E.L. James teaches how to write smut

[StephenMiletus]

Just saw this story:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...es-release-new-DIY-book-write-mummy-porn.html

While I won't be buying this book, I am curious about what the rest of you think.

Sorry if this has been discussed elsewhere. Just point me to that thread, close this one, & I'll be happy.

 

[eWoman]

Thanks for posting this...I wouldn't have known about this otherwise...won't buy it, but I don't write either. I could never achieve the heights that's so abundant on Lit! Take care...

 

[JackLuis]

After the beating ELJ took on the AH for her book, I doubt that many here will run out and buy her new book.

Of course, what the fuck do I know for sure?

Don't worry about posting here, at worst all you do is stimulate some discussion,

 

[sr71plt]

No, there's worse. This will stimulate regurgitation of same old, same old ranting.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Mummy porn? i don't know..

I kinda have a thing for the sarcophagi, but for fucking? I'd rather have one without all the dust and bones in it.

(I refuse to comment on E.L. James)

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Will it help me cleanse my scribbles of prepositional phrases? I just gotta know!

 

[Stella_Omega]

Will it help me cleanse my scribbles of prepositional phrases? I just gotta know!

I just can't wait for the kindle preview! *nods*

Not that we would be able to tell anything from that. Have you noticed how many chapters of these kinds of books are sales pitch? Most of the how-to authors I've tried only give you meat around the last third of the book.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I just can't wait for the kindle preview! *nods*

Not that we would be able to tell anything from that. Have you noticed how many chapters of these kinds of books are sales pitch? Most of the how-to authors I've tried only give you meat around the last third of the book.

What I like about Joseph M. Williams is how his writing books come with directions for how to fix the crap, and rules of thumb to recognize potential trouble. He doesnt mess around with the usual fare, he addresses what craps up your prose, and what motivates readers to keep reading.

I also own his THE CRAFT OF ARGUMENT book.

 

[StephenMiletus]

After the beating ELJ took on the AH for her book, I doubt that many here will run out and buy her new book.

Maybe the fact no one here cares about this book shows it will only be a best seller only if the mommies who bought her other 3 books buy this one.

Of course, what the fuck do I know for sure?

Don't worry about posting here, at worst all you do is stimulate some discussion.

I was expecting to find some novel variations on "E.L. James teach writing erotica? LOL". Or maybe lines like "This book really left me aroused. It fit between my legs & touched that special spot very nicely. And I didn't need to buy it to get that good feeling; I availed myself of its usefulness in the bookstore lave, & after I was done, I returned it to its place on the shelf."

 

[TxRad]

Maybe the fact no one here cares about this book shows it will only be a best seller only if the mommies who bought her other 3 books buy this one.



I was expecting to find some novel variations on "E.L. James teach writing erotica? LOL". Or maybe lines like "This book really left me aroused. It fit between my legs & touched that special spot very nicely. And I didn't need to buy it to get that good feeling; I availed myself of its usefulness in the bookstore lave, & after I was done, I returned it to its place on the shelf."

The question is how many of those mommies write?

 

[Stella_Omega]

I was expecting to find...

We don't much live up to expectations around here. And E.L James has been minced to a fine powder anyway.

The question is how many of those mommies write?

I won't say that most mommies write porn, but I'll bet that most (not all, please notice, but a majority) women who write it are mommies. There are reasons for that. After a day of being for everyone else but yourself, you kind of want to take over the sandbox on your own account. And one's personal fantasy is yours alone. Nothing you need to share with the kids or hubby. It's an enormous motivator!

 

[TxRad]

We don't much live up to expectations around here. And E.L James has been minced to a fine powder anyway.
I won't say that most mommies write porn, but I'll bet that most (not all, please notice, but a majority) women who write it are mommies. There are reasons for that. After a day of being for everyone else but yourself, you kind of want to take over the sandbox on your own account. And one's personal fantasy is yours alone. Nothing you need to share with the kids or hubby. It's an enormous motivator!

I like that. It makes sense on so many levels.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Prediction: We're gonna learn that E.L.James is Milli Vanilli.

 

[chocolatecookie3]

We don't much live up to expectations around here. And E.L James has been minced to a fine powder anyway.
I won't say that most mommies write porn, but I'll bet that most (not all, please notice, but a majority) women who write it are mommies. There are reasons for that. After a day of being for everyone else but yourself, you kind of want to take over the sandbox on your own account. And one's personal fantasy is yours alone. Nothing you need to share with the kids or hubby. It's an enormous motivator!

I agree with Stella! I'm a mommy porn writer. I like having some fantasies to myself!

 

[carlieplum]

I'd hazard a guess that you can get better advice, for free, from the How-To section of literotica.

But it's human nature. E.L. James got lucky. People don't want to believe she just got lucky, so they'll read her book instead of something better by Selena_Kitt, thinking that will give them a leg up. (Nassim Taleb nailed it in his book Black Swan.)

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I'd hazard a guess that you can get better advice, for free, from the How-To section of literotica.

But it's human nature. E.L. James got lucky. People don't want to believe she just got lucky, so they'll read her book instead of something better by Selena_Kitt, thinking that will give them a leg up. (Nassim Taleb nailed it in his book Black Swan.)

BLACK SWAN, good book

 

[carlieplum]

I'm a mommy porn writer too, but I make sure Mr. CarliePlum reads my stuff. It has more benefits than keeping it a secret.

 

[lovecraft68]

I'd hazard a guess that you can get better advice, for free, from the How-To section of literotica.

But it's human nature. E.L. James got lucky. People don't want to believe she just got lucky, so they'll read her book instead of something better by Selena_Kitt, thinking that will give them a leg up. (Nassim Taleb nailed it in his book Black Swan.)

I thought it was just luck at first until I realized she is/was a tv producer with a ton of connections.

I'm just wondering if the book wouldn't be better titled as "how not to"

I sure as hell am glad she is not writing a how to on BDSM.

 

[TE999]

Her book should be titled "How To Write Sexual Fantasy Crap For Fun and Profit: Fifty Ways To Make Middle Aged Housewives Horns Grow."

 

[Stella_Omega]

Her book should be titled "How To Write Sexual Fantasy Crap For Fun and Profit: Fifty Ways To Make Middle Aged Housewives Horns Grow."

You say "middle aged housewife" like it's a bad thing.

 

[slyc_willie]

You say "middle aged housewife" like it's a bad thing.

No, I think he was identifying his target audience.

 

[Stella_Omega]

No, I think he was identifying his target audience.

Reminds me of a song;

CUUUU-pid, draw back your bow-eo

And let your arrow go-eo...

 

[TxRad]

Reminds me of a song;

CUUUU-pid, draw back your bow-eo

And let your arrow go-eo...

If you ever even thought about your pecker gettin' caught in a bow string, you would more fully understand why the merry men of old wore tights.

 

[sensualwhispers]

e.l james

Well im a mommy and i write "mommy porn" as it is called, but fifty shades what utter trash. badly written and implausible, even for porn. So please take it as read i will not be purchasing her new book.

 

[lovecraft68]

I'll give you the cliff notes.

Step one, find a wildly successful series aimed at an audience half your age(which is your level of maturity anyway)

Write a full blown fan fic based on it where you even use the names of the original characters (let's say, oh, I don't know Ed and Bella)

Go back and re write your own copy cat story and change names.

Substitute tell tale vampire traits to um,....something else you have no clue about! BDSM!

Next step after the success of your rip off(that you have to kick some money over to the original author for) scratch your head and say duh when your publisher wants more.

Wait! That's it, write another book about something you know nothing about! Sex!