"Drowning"...(feedback please)

[~Dream~]

I submit this poem without the knowledge of my Master Artful,so I'll probably get my A** chewed for it but it's so beautifully done ..He used each 1st word of Jewelz 1st Diary entry posts and composed a poem from it and I think that it takes talent to do that (JMHO) and I wish to share the poem here with other poets.. thank-you..
Drowning

Out of control for much of my life
Losing myself in needless strife
Desperate to find a love that's true
Crashing deep 'neath oceans blue
Fallen angel I perceive as me
Lost not found while tears run free
Boundaries gone hope had given
Spirit broken yet anger driven
Pain I feel like not before
Scared little girl not sure no more
Dancing feet now stuck like glue
Tears that stream not just a few
Love hurts so bad when it's denied
Scars cry out loud just let me die
Sleep I try but can't succeed
Passion lures the core that's me
Feverish lust that raged my soul
Forsaken now my blood runs cold
Staring blindly at wished for scenes
Mindless battles of dreams unseen
Numb and weak no strength to find
Craving touch so soft and kind
Aching souls reach out to share
Drowning sorrows with truth not dare

©Jewelz 7/'02