Drinking Songs (Hic!)

[AmberLGreen]

What good can drinkin' do, what good can drinkin' do?
Lord, I drink all night but the next day I still feel blue.
There's a glass on the table, they say it's gonna ease all my pain,
And there's a glass on the table, they say it's gonna ease all my pain.
But I drink it down, an' the next day I feel the same.
Gimme whiskey, gimme bourbon, give me gin.
Oh, gimme whiskey, give me bourbon, gimme gin.
Cause it don't matter what I'm drinkin', Lord, as long as it drown this sorrow I'm in.
I start drinking Friday, I start drinking Friday night.
Lord, I start drinking Friday, start drinking Friday night.
But then I wake up on Sunday, child, there ain't nothin' that's right.
My man he left me, child, he left me here.
Yeah, my good man left me, went away and left me here.
Lord, I'm feelin' lowdown, just give me another glass of beer.
What good can drinkin' do, what good can drinkin' do?
Well, I drink all night but the next day I still feel blue!!!

 

[Modern_drunkard]

Waking Up Drunk- Spider Bags

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QssASLurwJI

I know more about my future
Than I do about my past
If you got something that you wanna tell me
Baby, you better make it fast

Shot of whiskey, glass of stout
That'll cure or go south

Waking up drunk makes me happy
Lately you just bring me down

 

[Mr_bogey]

And as I went home on Wednesday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw a pipe up on the chair where my old pipe should be
Well, I called me wife and I said to her, "Will you kindly tell to me"
"Who owns that pipe up on the chair where my old pipe should be?"
Ah, you're drunk, you're drunk
You silly old fellow, still you can not see
That's a lovely tin whistle that me mother sent to me
Well, it's many a day I've travelled a hundred miles or more
But tobacco in a tin whistle sure I never saw before
And as I went home on Thursday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw two boots beneath the bed where my old boots should be
Well, I called me wife and I said to her, "Will you kindly tell to me"
"Who owns them boots beneath the bed where my old boots should be?"
Ah, you're drunk, you're drunk
You silly old fellow, still you can not see
They're two lovely Geranium pots me mother sent to me
Well, it's many a day I've travelled a hundred miles or more
But laces in Geranium pots I never saw before
And as I went home on Friday night as drunk as drunk could be
I saw a head upon the bed where my old head should be
Well, I called me wife and I said to her, "Will you kindly tell to me"
"Who owns that head upon the bed where my old head should be?"
Ah, you're drunk, you're drunk
You silly old fellow, still you can not see
That's a baby boy that me mother sent to me
Well, it's many a day I've travelled a hundred miles or more
But a baby boy with his whiskers on sure I never saw before

 

[Modern_drunkard]

What Made Milwaukee Famous - Rod Stewart

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TWDAAyccvu4

It's late and she is waiting and I know I must go home
But every time I start to leave, they play another song
Then someone buys another round and whatever drinks are free
What made Milwaukee famous has made a loser out of me

 

[Modern_drunkard]

Gimme a Beer - Diamond Rugs

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rw_-VMbZkGc

I want the kinda watch so everyone who saw it says hey his is better than mine
I want the kinda chains golden and untamed don't look man you might go blind
I want the kinda feline like a tiger or a lion and listen to my baby purr
I want the kinda house where I sit down on the couch and say damn it feels good to be a gangster
But, Oh....who cares?
Gimme a Beer!
Gimme a Beer!

 

[Mr_bogey]

I was sitting in the Hollywood Hawaiian Hotel
I was staring in my empty coffee cup
I was thinking that the gypsy wasn't lyin'
All the salty margaritas in Los Angeles
I'm gonna drink 'em up

And if California slides into the ocean
Like the mystics and statistics say it will
I predict this motel will be standing until I pay my bill

Don't the sun look angry through the trees
Don't the trees look like crucified thieves
Don't you feel like Desperados under the eaves
Heaven help the one who leaves

Still waking up in the mornings with shaking hands
And I'm trying to find a girl who understands me
But except in dreams you're never really free
Don't the sun look angry at me

 

[Modern_drunkard]

The Slow Descent Into Alcoholism - The New Pornographers

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=DN1Foddvez8

I say my ever loosening grip
On the commonest courtesies slipped
From my hands, when I really need her
When I need change for the parking meters
I say my, my, my, my slow descent
Into alcoholism it went

 

[AlexBailey]

The Drunken Scotsman

Well a Scotsman clad in kilt left a bar one evening fair
And one could tell by how he walked that he'd drunk more than his share
He fumbled round until he could no longer keep his feet
Then he stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street
Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
He stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street

About that time two young and lovely girls just happened by
And one says to the other with a twinkle in her eye
See young sleeping Scotsman so strong and handsome built
I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath the kilt
Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath the kilt

They crept up on that sleeping Scotsman quiet as could be
Lifted up his kilt about an inch so they could see
And there behold, for them to view, beneath his Scottish skirt
Was nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth
Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
Was nothing more than God had graced him with upon his birth

They marveled for a moment, then one said we must be gone
Let's leave a present for our friend, before we move along
As a gift they left a blue silk ribbon, tied into a bow
Around the bonnie star, the Scots kilt did lift and show
Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
Around the bonnie star, the Scots kilt did lift and show

Now the Scotsman woke to nature's call and stumbled toward the trees
Behind a bush, he lifts his kilt and gawks at what he sees
And in a startled voice he says to what's before his eyes
O lad I don't know where you been but I see you won first prize
Ring ding diddle diddle I de oh ring di diddly I oh
O lad I don't know where you been but I see you won first prize

- Traditional, Robert Angus Black

 

[Modern_drunkard]

Barroom Bliss - Drag The River

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=72vTtESYixY

My mind doesn't work so well these day
I drink all my waking hours away
If I sit here long enough
Maybe I think of something
That'll makes you stay
Something tells me not think at all
I sit in the darkness starin at the wall
This lonliness is hell
I search for drinks and things
To make me well
I spend my life staring
Through my bloodshot eyes
I'll never know where I belong
With eyes closed fast
I play photographs of you
You stare at me and wonder
How I'm doing
I tell you that I'm fine
That thought echoes through my empty mind
I close my eyes again
With barroom bliss and a strangers kiss
I'm home
Cause noone ever wants to be alone
I doubt that there is a way
I'll ever speak the words
That'll make you stay
My mind doesnt work so well these days

 

[jaF0]

Private Jones came in one night
Full of cheer and very bright
He'd been out all day upon the spree
He bumped into Sergeant Smeck
Put his arms around his neck
And in his ear he whispered tenderly.....

Kiss me goodnight, Sergeant-Major
Tuck me in my little wooden bed
We all love you, Sergeant-Major,
When we hear you bawling, "Show a leg!"

Don't forget to wake me in the morning
And bring me 'round a nice hot cup of tea
Kiss me goodnight Sergeant-Major
Sergeant-Major, be a mother to me

And don't forget to shut the blinkin' door.




-----------------
Done by several with slightly different lyrics.

 

[pfflyerhot]

Appropriate for Lit, this song...

Hank Williams Jr.:

Well you head on out in the jungle
Looking for the girls to tumble
Up and down and all around the stage
But when the women start taking their clothes off
Now we have got some strange laws
The most hypocritical thing around these days
Cause where i live in Tennessee
Why an auto parts calandar
Hey that's pornography
But go right down the road, read what the sign says

Naked women and Beer
We got it all in here
For your eyes and your ears
They show it all in the clear
Way up north and down south
Whoo, somebody shut my mouth

Now i ain't saying it's right
But i ain't saying it's wrong
But myself i enjoy the site
Of pretty girls dancing to their songs
And it's been like that
Since way back when
From little Egypt to the Vegas strip
And when the music starts grooving
And the girls start moving
Ain't nothing gonna make them quit

Naked women and beer
We got it all in here
For your eyes and your ears
They show it all in the clear
Way up north and down south
Whoo, somebody shut my mouth

Nak-nak-nak-nak-nak-naked women
Nak-nak-nak-naked women
Ice cold beer
It's all together in here
Naked women and beer

Come on in out of the rain
We got the girls that will make you
Spend all your change
Naked women and beer
(repeat chorus)

 

[AmberLGreen]

Fucker of skanks sent this to all of those who can’t hold their liquor

https://youtu.be/QssASLurwJI

 

[jaF0]

Moonshine, Tennessee wine,
Running around my head.
Moonshine, friend of mine,
Help me to find my bed.

I said I'd never do a town again,
But here I go, I'm paintin' it red.
Forgetting all the easy words I said,
Now I'm walkin' out the door.
I just got to get some more of that...

Moonshine, Tennessee wine,
Running around my head.
Moonshine, friend of mine,
Help me to find my bed.

Now they say that it's closin' time again,
And I'm lookin' around for my new best friend.
I gotta find a place to lay my head,
Cause I think I'm gonna cry,
I believe I'm gonna die,
Or maybe just fall down by the road side.

Moonshine, Tennessee wine,
Running around my head.
Moonshine, friend of mine,
Help me to find my bed.
Help me to find my bed.



-- Five Man Electrical band.

 

[HumpDayHoratio]

B double, E double R U N beer run
B double, E double R U N beer run
All we need is a ten and fiver
A car and key and a sober driver
B double, E double R U N beer run

A couple of frat guys from Abilene
Drove out all night to see Robert Earl Keen
At the Kpei swine and sworay dance
They wore baseball caps and khaki pants

They wanted cigs so to save a little money
They got one from this hippie who smelt kinda funny
And next thing they knew they were both pretty hungry
And pretty thirsty tooo

B double, E double R U N beer run
B double, E double R U N beer run
All we need is a ten and fiver
A car and key and a sober driver
B double, E double R U N beer run

Found a store with a sign said, "Their beer was coldest"
So they sent, in Brad, 'cause he looked the oldest
He got a case of beer and a candy bar
Walked over to where all them registers are

Layed his fake ID on the counter top
The clerk looked and turned and looked back up
And stopped and said, "Boy, I'm not gonna call the cops
But I'm gonna have to keep this card"
The guys both took it pretty hard

B double, E double R U N beer run
B double, E double R U N beer run
Oh, how happy we would be
Had we only brought a better fake ID
B double, E double R U N beer run

They found this another old hippie named Sleepie John
He claimed to be the one from the Robert Earl song
So they gave him all the cash, he bought 'em some brooze
Was a beautiful day out in Santa Cruz

They were feelin' so good it shoulda been a crime
The crowd was cool and the band was prime
They made it back up front to their seats just in time
To sing with all their friends
"The road goes on forever and the party never ends"

B double, E double R U N beer run
B double, E double R U N beer run
All we need is a ten and a fiver
A car and key and a sober driver
B double, E double R U N beer run
B double, E double R U N beer run

Todd Snider

 

[jaF0]

Well, show me the way
To the next whiskey bar
Oh, don't ask why
Oh, don't ask why
Show me the way
To the next whiskey bar
Oh, don't ask why
Oh, don't ask why
For if we don't find
The next whiskey bar
I tell you we must die
I tell you we must die
I tell you, I tell you
I tell you we must die


The Doors

 

[HumpDayHoratio]

I've seen the bright lights of Memphis and the Commodore Hotel
And underneath a street lamp, I met a Southern Belle
Well, she took me to the river where she casts her spell
And in that southern moonlight, she sang the song so well

If you'll be my Dixie Chicken, I'll be your Tennessee Lamb
And we can walk together down in Dixieland
Down in Dixieland

Well, we made all the hot spots, my money flowed like wine
And then that lowdown southern whiskey began to fog my mind
And I don't remember church bells or the money I put down
On the white picket fence and boardwalk of the house at the edge of town
Oh, but boy do I remember the strain of her refrain
And the nights we spent together, and the way she called my name

If you'll be my Dixie Chicken, I'll be your Tennessee Lamb
And we can walk together down in Dixieland
Down in Dixieland

Well, it's been a year since she ran away
Guess that guitar player sure could play
She always liked to sing along, she's always handy with a song
Then one night in the lobby of the Commodore Hotel
I chanced to meet a bartender who said he knew her well
And as he handed me a drink, he began to hum a song
And all the boys there at the bar began to sing along

If you'll be my Dixie Chicken, I'll be your Tennessee Lamb
And we can walk together down in Dixieland
Down in Dixieland

Little Feat

 

[Ingenue844]

My friend named Jack
He's got my back
He always seems to know right where I'm at
My friend Jose
He likes to play
He's always up for anything I say

Little bit of red, lotta bit of crown
Don't matter what it is
I'm gonna drink it down, down, down

The wine, the beer, the whiskey
Are the only things that fix me
I'm not saying it's a problem
I can stop it if I wanna
But the wine, the beer, the whiskey
They always get me

My friend named Gin
She's got some friends
I'm talking Brandy, Sherry, and their brother Jim
My friend, the Captain
We call him Morgan
He likes to anchor down and hang over 'til mornin'

Little bit of red, lotta bit of white
Don't matter what it is
It's gonna make it all alright

The wine, the beer, the whiskey
Are the only things that fix me
I'm not saying it's a problem
I can stop it if I wanna
But the wine, the beer, the whiskey
They always get me

My friend named Tito
He's my amigo
I'm gonna follow him around wherever he go

The wine, the beer, the whiskey
Yeah, I got all my friends here with me
I'm not saying it's a problem
I can stop it if I wanna
But who would wanna?
When the wine, the beer, the whiskey
They always get me
They always get me
They always get me
Yeah, they always get me

 

[HumpDayHoratio]

Whiskey River take my mind,
Don't let her mem'ry torture me.
Whiskey River don't run dry,
You're all I've got, take care of me.

Whiskey River take my mind,
Don't let her mem'ry torture me.
Whiskey River don't run dry,
You're all I've got, take care of me.

I'm drowning in a whiskey river,
Bathing my mem'ried mind in the wetness of its soul.
Feeling the amber current flowin' from my mind.
And warm an empty heart you left so cold.

Whiskey River take my mind,
Don't let her mem'ry torture me.
Whiskey River don't run dry,
You're all I've got, take care of me.

I'm drowning in a whiskey river,
Bathing my mem'ried mind in the wetness of its soul.
Feeling the amber current flowin' from my mind.
And warm an empty heart you left so cold.

Whiskey River take my mind,
Don't let her mem'ry torture me.
Whiskey River don't run dry,
You're all I've got, take care of me.

Willie Nelson.

 

[AlexBailey]

Gone are the days when the ox fall down
You take up the yoke and plow the fields around
Gone are the days when the ladies said
"Please, Gentle Jack Jones, won't you come to me"

Brown-eyed women and red grenadine
The bottle was dusty but the liquor was clean
Sound of the thunder with the rain pourin' down
And it looks like the old man's gettin' on

1920, when he stepped to the bar
He drank to the dregs of the whiskey jar
1930, when the wall caved in
He made his way selling red-eyed gin

Brown-eyed women and red grenadine...

Delilah Jones was the mother of twins
Two times over and the rest were sins
Raised eight boys, only I turned bad
Didn't get the lickin's that the other ones had

Brown-eyed women and red grenadine...

Tumble down shack in Big Foot county
Snowed so hard that the roof caved in
Delilah Jones went to meet her god
And the old man never was the same again

Daddy made whiskey and he made it well
Cost two dollars and it burned like hell
I cut hick'ry just to fire the still
Drink down a bottle and be ready to kill

Brown-eyed women and red grenadine...

Gone are the days when the ox fall down
You take up the yoke and plow the fields around
Gone are the days when the ladies said
"Please, Gentle Jack Jones won't you come to me"

Brown-eyed women and red grenadine
The bottle was dusty but the liquor was clean
Sound of the thunder with the rain pourin' down
And it looks like the old man's gettin' on
And it looks like the old man's gettin' on

(Brown Eyed Women - Robert Hunter)

 

[HumpDayHoratio]

Well, like to explain to you all before
I ain't no drinkin' man
I tried it once and it got me highly irregular
And I swore I'd never do it again
I promised my brother in-law that I'd go up watch his still
While he went in to town to vote
It was right up on the mountain
Where the map said it would be
Friends let me tell you one thing
Though it wasn't no ordinary still
It stood up on that mountainside
Like a hugh golden opal

God's yeller moon shinin' on the cool clear evenin'
God's little lanterns twinklin' on and off in the heavens
Like I explain'd to you once before I ain't no drinkin' man
But temptation got the best of me
And I took a slash
That yella whiskey runnin' down my throat
Like honey dew vine water

And I took another slash
Took another'n an another'n an another'n
For you knew I'd downed one whole jug of that shit
And commenced to gettin' hot flashes
Goose pimples was runnin' up and down my body
And a feelin' came over me
Like somethin' I'd never experienced before
It was like, like I was in love
In love for the first time, with anything that moved
Animate, inanimate it didn't matter
It's like there's a great neon sign flashin' on an' off
In my brain sayin' "Jimmy Buffett there's a great day a comin'"
'Cause I was drunk
I wasn't knee crawlin', slip slidin', Reggie Youngin'
Commode huggin' drunk

I was God's own drunk and a fearless man
And that's when I first saw the bear
He was a Kodiak lookin' fella 'bout nineteen feet tall
He rambled up over the hill
Expectin' me to do one of two things
Flip or fly, I didn't do either one
It hung him up

He started sniffin' around my body tryin' to smell fear
But he ain't gonna smell no fear 'cause
I'm God's own drunk and a fearless man
It hung him up
He looked right in my eyes, and my eyes
Was a lot redder than his was
It hung him up

So I approached him, I said "Mr. Bear, I love
Every hair on your twenty-seven acre body
I know you got a lot of friends over there
On the other side of the hill
There's ole' rare bear, tall bear, Freddy bear, Kelly bear
Really bear, smelly the bear, smokey the bear
Pokey the bear
I want you to go back over there tonight
And tell them I'm feelin' right
You tell them I love each and everyone of them
Like a brother and a sister

But if they give me any trouble tonight
I'm gonna run every God damn one of them off the hill"
He took two steps backwards and didn't know what to think
Neither did I but bein' charitable and cautious
Well hell I approached him again
I said "Mr. Bear, You know in the eyes of the Lord
We're both beasts when it comes right down to it

So I want you to be my buddy, Buddy bear"
So I took ole' buddy bear by his island size paw
And I led him over to the still
He's a sniffin' around that thing cause
He's smellin' somethin' good
I gave him one of them jugs of honey dew vine water
He downed it up right
Looked like one of them damn bears in the circus

Sippin' sasparilly in the moonlight
I gave him another'n an another'n an another'n
For I knew it he downed eight of them
And commenced to doin' the bear dance
Two snips, a snort, a fly turn, and a grunt
It was so simple like the jitter bug
It plum evaded me

We worked ourselves into a tumultuous uproar
And I was awful tired and went over to the hillside
And I laid down and went to sleep
Slept for four hours and dreampt me some tremulous dreams
When I woke up, there was God's yeller moon
Shinin' on the clear cool evenin'

God's little lanterns twinklin' on and off
In the heavens
My buddy the bear was a missin'
Want to know something else friends and neighbors
So was that still

Written by Lord Buckley

Performed by Jimmy Buffett

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

Nightrain

Loaded like a freight train
Flyin' like an aeroplane
Feelin' like a space brain
One more time tonight

Well, I'm a west coast struttin
One bad mother got a rattlesnake suitcase under my arm
Said, I'm a mean machine, been drinkin' gasoline
And, honey, you can make my motor hum
Well, I got one chance left in a nine lives cat
I got a dog eat dog sly smile
I got a Molotov cocktail with a match, to-go
I smoke my cigarette with style
And I can tell you, honey, you can make my money tonight
Wake up late, honey, put on your clothes
An' take your credit card to the liquor store
An' that's one for you, and two for me by tonight

I'll be loaded like a freight train
Flyin' like an aeroplane
Feelin' like a space brain
One more time tonight

I'm on the nightrain, bottoms up
I'm on the nightrain, fill my cup
I'm on the nightrain, ready to crash and burn, I never learn
I'm on the nightrain, I love that stuff
I'm on the nightrain, an' I can never get enough
I'm on the nightrain, never to return, no

Loaded like a freight train
Flyin' like an aeroplane
Speedin' like a space brain
One more time tonight

I'm on the nightrain, an' I'm looking for some
I'm on the nightrain, so I can leave this slum
I'm on the nightrain, an' I'm ready to crash and burn
Nightrain, bottoms up
I'm on the nightrain, fill my cup
I'm on the nightrain, ah, ah, ah, whoa yeah
I'm on the nightrain, love that stuff
I'm on the nightrain, an' I can never get enough
Ridin' the nightrain, I guess I, I guess, I guess, I guess, I never learn
On the nightrain, float me home
Oh, I'm on the nightrain
Ridin' the nightrain, never to return
Nightrain

 

[Mo_Bandy]

Hungover and Horny - Diamond Rugs

Last night I went looking for fun
I took it just a little to far
It's such a drag getting slapped in the face
When you're sittin in the back of a car
Hungover and horny
Too sick to call
I'm as hard as a rock
I should be havin' a ball

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

Drink Drank Drunk Hellyeah

I'm a madman and I came to go,
I'm on the move, I wanna screw, I wanna fuck till' I'm sore,
Gather up your women and children, we're here to throw down,
And drink up all the booze that you've got in your house,
There ain't a god damn thing that you can do,
Cause we're gonna trash this party like we did in high school,
Tap up the barrel and twist up the weed,
Law that I decree, it's our time now so everybody scream yeah!
Let's get fucked up, till we fall down,
So everybody get drink drank drunk right now,
Let's get tore up, till we're face down,
Because the HELLYEAH drink, drank, drunks are back in town
Right now
To all the hellions all around the globe,
Slam your fist on the bar demand a round of shots
Half rack, a joint and a bottle of booze,
I can't walk a straight line but that's the life I choose,
Call me an animal, but I'm bringin' the hope,
If this party was the Vatican then I'd be the Pope,
Tap up the kegger, twist up the weed,
Law that I decree, it's our time now so everybody scream... Yeah!
Let's get fucked up, till we fall down,
So everybody get drink drank drunk right now,
Let's get tore up, till we're face down,
Because the HELLYEAH drink, drank, drunks and we're back in town
Right now, let's get fucked up
Right now
There's only two reasons, that we showed up here,
To party and kick some ass, and we're almost outta beer
There's only two reasons that we showed up here,
To party and kick some ass, and we're almost outta beer

 

[Mo_Bandy]

Theme From Cheers - Titus Andronicus

So let's get fucked up, and let's pretend we're all okay
And if you've got something that you can't live with save it for another day, all right?
Save it for another day

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

My own worst enemy


Can we forget about the things I said when I was drunk?
I didn't mean to call you that
I can't remember what was said, or what you threw at me
Please tell me
Please tell me why
My car is in the front yard
And I'm sleeping with my clothes on
I came in through the window last night
And you're long gone, gone
It's no surprise to me, I am my own worst enemy
'Cause every now and then, I kick the living shit out of me
The smoke alarm is going off, and there's a cigarette
Still burning
Please tell me why
My car is in the front yard
And I'm sleeping with my clothes on
I came in through the window last night
And you're long gone, gone
Please tell me why
My car is in the front yard
And I'm sleeping with my clothes on
I came in through the window last night
it's no surprise to me, I am my own worst enemy
(Ah-ooh) 'cause every now and then, I kick the living shit out of me
(Ah-ooh) can we forget about the things I said when I was drunk?
(Ah-ooh) I didn't mean to call you that