Domination in a marital relationship question.

[Lavared]

I almost feel like I should begin this post with "Greetings, fair people of Earth. I am a sojourner from another planet." because I spend all of my time on the general board and this is my first post on the BDSM forum.

I am writing a story and want to know if one of my basic premises is feasible. What is the likelihood that a dominant man and dominant woman would ever marry? Does this happen in real life and if so, are their chances for a successful marriage good?

 

[Chicklet]

Well, it's not as if I can quote you any statistics, but I see dominant couples and am contacted by Dominant couples online all the time.. two tops looking for a submissive for their relationship. It seems to happen often enough, and I'm sure they have the same problems with relationships as vanilla people or D/s people do.

I think the way to think about it would be... these people aren't necessarily in it because their partner satisfies THAT part of their sexual life... like when a submissive woman ends up in a relationship with a vanilla guy, or a dominant woman finds a vanilla guy... the relationships can still work out, just without the kink. but they could find a way to incorporate their dominating sexual personalities with a third

 

[lust4us]

I believe that in every Dominant there is a submissive. In fact in order to be a good Dom you would have to know what it is like to be a submissive. We all have our preferences but my husband is a switch and I always thought I was a Dom. When in fact is was because I needed a woman to bring out the sub in me. I had to be real hot and excited and then I was able to experience the submissive side. Because of that I am a much better Dom. Hope this helps! Oh and yes, I think any marriage can work if you are both committed to it!

 

[A_Kefka]

Don't know how much my thoughts are worth on the subject, lacking any expirience with D/s. But if they are both Dom, and enjoy having subs of the same gender, or if they like either gender, then they would have a lot in common in that area, which can make them enjoy it. adn if everything else about them makes them want to be together, then it soulnd like it could work to me.

 

[chezzabel]

Absolutely yes!

I recently became engaged to my Master. Being a submissive is such an essential part of my nature, I don't think I could marry someone who was not dominant.

 

[Lavared]

Thank you to all who responded.

 

[LadyAria]

I almost feel like I should begin this post with "Greetings, fair people of Earth. I am a sojourner from another planet." because I spend all of my time on the general board and this is my first post on the BDSM forum.

I am writing a story and want to know if one of my basic premises is feasible. What is the likelihood that a dominant man and dominant woman would ever marry? Does this happen in real life and if so, are their chances for a successful marriage good?

I suppose it could happen. I mean what if they married young and found their sexuality later in life. Most marriages I've seen as D/s, but it isn't unthinkable.

 

[Lavared]

Would you say that put into simplistic terms (sadism = inflicting pain) and (domination = control or subjection) is a fair assumption?

 

[raven2]

Would you say that put into simplistic terms (sadism = inflicting pain) and (domination = control or subjection) is a fair assumption?

That would seem logical.

 

[A_Kefka]

sounds like the definitions to me

 

[catalina_francisco]

Would you say that put into simplistic terms (sadism = inflicting pain) and (domination = control or subjection) is a fair assumption?

It is on track though if you are writing a story it always helps add strength if you understand the concepts, psychology of the individuals more so than just presenting it as a state of being without any substance. Simply put, there is more to being sadistic then inflicting pain in a vacuum...and being sadistic is also not necessarily limited to being Dominant, it can also be found in a submissive.

Catalina

 

[Lavared]

Simply put, there is more to being sadistic then inflicting pain in a vacuum...and being sadistic is also not necessarily limited to being Dominant, it can also be found in a submissive.

Two sides of the same coin I suppose.

I'm setting up the background on the sadistic female in my story and have written that while she likes to give pain, comforting her partners afterwards is also part of what brings her pleasure. I hope that is within the realm of possibility and also that there is (as I'm sure there must be) a difference between a sexual sadist and an out-and-out sadistic person. Surely a sexual sadist brings pain but wants to also bring pleasure.

 

[Never]

You're from the GB too? I feel like I should throw rocks at you to make you feel more welcomed.

Yes, that's realistic.

 

[Lavared]

You're from the GB too? I feel like I should throw rocks at you to make you feel more welcomed.

LOL. Better have good aim, I'm a talented ducker.