Divorce with kids sucks

[86camaro]

Ignore the not so original screen name, I joined back in my college days.

Figured this would be the best place to vent because my wife does not even know this site exists (have not really been on untill she left) and she does not know this screen name so though it's a bit off topic it's my best way to talk and vent and know nobody is watching.

I'm early 30's have a great job, nice car, nice house, financially stable. Have 3 boys oldest is 5.

Marriage was going down hill fast but we were trying to make things work... long story short before she left she trashed the car and house...... I have spent a few days alone cleaning the car and have $5000 in repairs to the house.

Early December I came home from work and her and the kids were gone.

Her family was tight liped and I later found out the car was ditched in a public parking lot about an hour away.

Found out we're she was (and is now) and filed for legal separation and full custody... Since then she has changed it to divorce and is filing motion after motion to cost me more money because she thinks I will be paying for all this.

She keeps throwing me under the bus to everyone and our kids. I was not able to talk to them untill the court orderd it about a month ago. This will all be over end of May but I still have not even seen pictures of the kids.

My case is soild, tons of witnesses, she has nothing so I know I will get the kids.

She tells people now that I cheated when everyone knows I did not, tells people I abused her when everyone knows I was not. She tells everyone I have a kid from a previous relationship when everyone knows I do not.

Since she has left I have found out all these horrific things she has been talking people before she left.

Come to find out it seems she said she was on birth control when she was not.... She admitted to people that she would only occasionally have sex with me because it was fun to deny me (I was likey to get it once a month)..... Found out she was doing things like dressing the kids in jeans and heavy king sleeve shirts when it was near 100 degrees outside. She was a stay at home mom, said she was him schooling our oldest when come to find out she was not. She expected me to work and then come home and take care of the house for her. She took care of the finances and I found out after she left that she was blowing around $1000 every 3 months or so.... All sorts of crap....

I have good days and bad days...... Mostly because I am around guys all day and not having a women to talk to anymore is surprisingly hard.... Not having someone to come home to at all is even harder.


Just looking for advise and a women around my age that has maybe been in my shoes and wants to talk and let me vent and what not.

Nobody I am around has been in this bad or a situation so I have yet to find anyone I can relate to.

Edit:not saying my situation is worse then others or anything like that, I realize there are those out there that have it or had it worse.

Pm me

 

[badbabysitter]

plenty of people have been in worse situations... yours sucks, no doubt.... but you're not the only one thats been done wrong by their spouse in horrible ways

 

[Debbie]

Ignore the not so original screen name, I joined back in my college days.

Figured this would be the best place to vent because my wife does not even know this site exists (have not really been on untill she left) and she does not know this screen name so though it's a bit off topic it's my best way to talk and vent and know nobody is watching.

I'm early 30's have a great job, nice car, nice house, financially stable. Have 3 boys oldest is 5.

Marriage was going down hill fast but we were trying to make things work... long story short before she left she trashed the car and house...... I have spent a few days alone cleaning the car and have $5000 in repairs to the house.

Early December I came home from work and her and the kids were gone.

Her family was tight liped and I later found out the car was ditched in a public parking lot about an hour away.

Found out we're she was (and is now) and filed for legal separation and full custody... Since then she has changed it to divorce and is filing motion after motion to cost me more money because she thinks I will be paying for all this.

She keeps throwing me under the bus to everyone and our kids. I was not able to talk to them untill the court orderd it about a month ago. This will all be over end of May but I still have not even seen pictures of the kids.

My case is soild, tons of witnesses, she has nothing so I know I will get the kids.

She tells people now that I cheated when everyone knows I did not, tells people I abused her when everyone knows I was not. She tells everyone I have a kid from a previous relationship when everyone knows I do not.

Since she has left I have found out all these horrific things she has been talking people before she left.

Come to find out it seems she said she was on birth control when she was not.... She admitted to people that she would only occasionally have sex with me because it was fun to deny me (I was likey to get it once a month)..... Found out she was doing things like dressing the kids in jeans and heavy king sleeve shirts when it was near 100 degrees outside. She was a stay at home mom, said she was him schooling our oldest when come to find out she was not. She expected me to work and then come home and take care of the house for her. She took care of the finances and I found out after she left that she was blowing around $1000 every 3 months or so.... All sorts of crap....

I have good days and bad days...... Mostly because I am around guys all day and not having a women to talk to anymore is surprisingly hard.... Not having someone to come home to at all is even harder.


Just looking for advise and a women around my age that has maybe been in my shoes and wants to talk and let me vent and what not.

Nobody I am around has been in this bad or a situation so I have yet to find anyone I can relate to.

Pm me

My best advice.

Dont drag the kids into it EVER. This means not bad mouthing their Mum when they are around or on the phone etc.

If you think you need to go see a counsellor or therapist or find a support group to go to. So that you can vent and work through this rough patch in your life and to be ok to help parent and love your children.

Dont sweat the petty stuff like which of you gets the fugly vase from off the mantel piece that your Great Aunt Flo left you but you hate and it has no sentimental value or is valuable.

Good luck

 

[eyer]

Ignore the not so original screen name, I joined back in my college days.

Figured this would be the best place to vent because my wife does not even know this site exists (have not really been on untill she left) and she does not know this screen name so though it's a bit off topic it's my best way to talk and vent and know nobody is watching.

I'm early 30's have a great job, nice car, nice house, financially stable. Have 3 boys oldest is 5.

Marriage was going down hill fast but we were trying to make things work... long story short before she left she trashed the car and house...... I have spent a few days alone cleaning the car and have $5000 in repairs to the house.

Early December I came home from work and her and the kids were gone.

Her family was tight liped and I later found out the car was ditched in a public parking lot about an hour away.

Found out we're she was (and is now) and filed for legal separation and full custody... Since then she has changed it to divorce and is filing motion after motion to cost me more money because she thinks I will be paying for all this.

She keeps throwing me under the bus to everyone and our kids. I was not able to talk to them untill the court orderd it about a month ago. This will all be over end of May but I still have not even seen pictures of the kids.

My case is soild, tons of witnesses, she has nothing so I know I will get the kids.

She tells people now that I cheated when everyone knows I did not, tells people I abused her when everyone knows I was not. She tells everyone I have a kid from a previous relationship when everyone knows I do not.

Since she has left I have found out all these horrific things she has been talking people before she left.

Come to find out it seems she said she was on birth control when she was not.... She admitted to people that she would only occasionally have sex with me because it was fun to deny me (I was likey to get it once a month)..... Found out she was doing things like dressing the kids in jeans and heavy king sleeve shirts when it was near 100 degrees outside. She was a stay at home mom, said she was him schooling our oldest when come to find out she was not. She expected me to work and then come home and take care of the house for her. She took care of the finances and I found out after she left that she was blowing around $1000 every 3 months or so.... All sorts of crap....

I have good days and bad days...... Mostly because I am around guys all day and not having a women to talk to anymore is surprisingly hard.... Not having someone to come home to at all is even harder.


Just looking for advise and a women around my age that has maybe been in my shoes and wants to talk and let me vent and what not.

Nobody I am around has been in this bad or a situation so I have yet to find anyone I can relate to.

Pm me

PM a chick named "Jennifer"...

...she came in here whining and moaning about her husband behind his back just like you're whining about your wife behind her back. You might need to PM a bozo called "rimmy", though, to see if you have his permission to ask her if she can lend you a pitiful shoulder to whine on.

She may even want to give you a mercy BJ...

...I mean, with a un like "86camaro", who wouldn't?

And you're no doubt right that absolutely no one has ever been in such a Woe is me! situation as yours...

...just like I'm no doubt right that my 2-incher is the biggest herman the world has ever known.

Have I posted GTFOH, yet?

 

[pollynova]

I'm sorry you are going through all this. Be strong and be there for your kids. They'll need you.

 

[parodyluvr75]

Ignore the not so original screen name, I joined back in my college days.

Figured this would be the best place to vent because my wife does not even know this site exists (have not really been on untill she left) and she does not know this screen name so though it's a bit off topic it's my best way to talk and vent and know nobody is watching.

I'm early 30's have a great job, nice car, nice house, financially stable. Have 3 boys oldest is 5.

Marriage was going down hill fast but we were trying to make things work... long story short before she left she trashed the car and house...... I have spent a few days alone cleaning the car and have $5000 in repairs to the house.

Early December I came home from work and her and the kids were gone.

Her family was tight liped and I later found out the car was ditched in a public parking lot about an hour away.

Found out we're she was (and is now) and filed for legal separation and full custody... Since then she has changed it to divorce and is filing motion after motion to cost me more money because she thinks I will be paying for all this.

She keeps throwing me under the bus to everyone and our kids. I was not able to talk to them untill the court orderd it about a month ago. This will all be over end of May but I still have not even seen pictures of the kids.

My case is soild, tons of witnesses, she has nothing so I know I will get the kids.

She tells people now that I cheated when everyone knows I did not, tells people I abused her when everyone knows I was not.She tells everyone I have a kid from a previous relationship when everyone knows I do not.

Since she has left I have found out all these horrific things she has been talking people before she left.

Come to find out it seems she said she was on birth control when she was not.... She admitted to people that she would only occasionally have sex with me because it was fun to deny me (I was likey to get it once a month)..... Found out she was doing things like dressing the kids in jeans and heavy king sleeve shirts when it was near 100 degrees outside. She was a stay at home mom, said she was him schooling our oldest when come to find out she was not. She expected me to work and then come home and take care of the house for her. She took care of the finances and I found out after she left that she was blowing around $1000 every 3 months or so.... All sorts of crap....

I have good days and bad days...... Mostly because I am around guys all day and not having a women to talk to anymore is surprisingly hard.... Not having someone to come home to at all is even harder.


Just looking for advise and a women around my age that has maybe been in my shoes and wants to talk and let me vent and what not.

Nobody I am around has been in this bad or a situation so I have yet to find anyone I can relate to.

Edit:not saying my situation is worse then others or anything like that, I realize there are those out there that have it or had it worse.

Pm me

.....

I'm sure the PMs will be pouring in.

 

[ChinaBandit]

...just like I'm no doubt right that my 2-incher is the biggest herman the world has ever known.

Admission he is in possession of a 2 inch cock...

 

[Riles]

I find the "self help" section of Chapters is much more therapeutic for this stuff than random people online.

 

[RobDownSouth]

I find the "self help" section of Chapters is much more therapeutic for this stuff than random people online.

True, but sometimes people just want to vent. God knows we've heard some pretty odious divorce stories in here before.

 

[Riles]

True, but sometimes people just want to vent. God knows we've heard some pretty odious divorce stories in here before.

Of course.

But it can be a simple flip of the coin as to whether this will turn out as desired, or make him wish he never logged on again.

For helpful advice, a book can be ones' best friend.

 

[Sinny]

Ignore the not so original screen name, I joined back in my college days.

Figured this would be the best place to vent because my wife does not even know this site exists (have not really been on untill she left) and she does not know this screen name so though it's a bit off topic it's my best way to talk and vent and know nobody is watching.

I'm early 30's have a great job, nice car, nice house, financially stable. Have 3 boys oldest is 5.

Marriage was going down hill fast but we were trying to make things work... long story short before she left she trashed the car and house...... I have spent a few days alone cleaning the car and have $5000 in repairs to the house.

Early December I came home from work and her and the kids were gone.

Her family was tight liped and I later found out the car was ditched in a public parking lot about an hour away.

Found out we're she was (and is now) and filed for legal separation and full custody... Since then she has changed it to divorce and is filing motion after motion to cost me more money because she thinks I will be paying for all this.

She keeps throwing me under the bus to everyone and our kids. I was not able to talk to them untill the court orderd it about a month ago. This will all be over end of May but I still have not even seen pictures of the kids.

My case is soild, tons of witnesses, she has nothing so I know I will get the kids.

She tells people now that I cheated when everyone knows I did not, tells people I abused her when everyone knows I was not. She tells everyone I have a kid from a previous relationship when everyone knows I do not.

Since she has left I have found out all these horrific things she has been talking people before she left.

Come to find out it seems she said she was on birth control when she was not.... She admitted to people that she would only occasionally have sex with me because it was fun to deny me (I was likey to get it once a month)..... Found out she was doing things like dressing the kids in jeans and heavy king sleeve shirts when it was near 100 degrees outside. She was a stay at home mom, said she was him schooling our oldest when come to find out she was not. She expected me to work and then come home and take care of the house for her. She took care of the finances and I found out after she left that she was blowing around $1000 every 3 months or so.... All sorts of crap....

I have good days and bad days...... Mostly because I am around guys all day and not having a women to talk to anymore is surprisingly hard.... Not having someone to come home to at all is even harder.


Just looking for advise and a women around my age that has maybe been in my shoes and wants to talk and let me vent and what not.

Nobody I am around has been in this bad or a situation so I have yet to find anyone I can relate to.

Edit:not saying my situation is worse then others or anything like that, I realize there are those out there that have it or had it worse.

Pm me

She's accusing you of cheating and the first thing you do is troll a porn site known for dirty stories and mouth breathers looking for hookups? Yeah, you have great judgment.

Are you sure you are not a control freak? Spending $1,000 in three months amounts to less than $100 a week. So if you make good money, spending $100 or less a week on nonsense stuff is ridiculous to be pissed about. You should be glad it wasn't more. What you should be pissed about and should be your first line of action is making sure your kids are ok. That is all that matters.

Something about your story just rings so false.

 

[GiggLeGasm]

I don't know enough about your situation to presume that my advice would be anything more than what your attorney could give you.. but
you're sure that you're getting the kids because "she has nothing."
In most states, unless you have some pre-arranged deal that split your marital assets, she has half of what you have. Also, the fact that "everyone knows" is of very little value to either of you.

People don't care that she ran off.
People don't care if you cheated.
People don't care about any of the gossip related to your situation.
People care about your children. Find the patience and kindness needed to deal with your situation in a way that does not carry a face of vengeance and those involved will eventually find peace.

 

[dolf]

Just looking for advise and a women around my age that has maybe been in my shoes and wants to talk and let me vent and what not.

Pm me

nothing more attractive than a man who wants to bitch about his wife with me *fap*

 

[Killswitch]

nothing more attractive than a man who wants to bitch about his wife with me *fap*

lol...

 

[Killswitch]

Something about your story just rings so false.

You read all that?

 

[parodyluvr75]

nothing more attractive than a man who wants to bitch about his wife with me *fap*

He started off as a woman.

http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?p=14770143#post14770143

 

[desertslave]

I just find it interesting that you list your house, car, and finances before your children.

 

[Sinny]

nothing more attractive than a man who wants to bitch about his wife with me *fap*

Ohhhhmyfuckkkk, when I was dating and meeting divorced men via online dating sites, I kept encountering men who sounded just like the OP. Those type of men strike me as insufferable, obtuse, egotistical and come with a heavy load of blame-everyone-for-everything.

I would never meet those ones or reply after an exchange or two.

 

[dolf]

Ohhhhmyfuckkkk, when I was dating and meeting divorced men via online dating sites, I kept encountering men who sounded just like the OP. Those type of men strike me as insufferable, obtuse, egotistical and come with a heavy load of blame-everyone-for-everything.

I would never meet those ones or reply after an exchange or two.

they are secretly resentful that she never cut his sandwiches the way is mommy did.

 

[Que]

No woman who plays the sympathetic ear for you is going to find you attractive Yes you will need to vent, but think about prioritizing your social interactions.

Women grieve the loss of a relationship while in it and are much quicker to rebound. No matter what the warning signs all guys report feeling blindsided.
It will be a year after the divorce is final before you can probably handle social interaction. You can start practicing now. Start telling yourself that the good news is you have a chance to meet new people and do so without agenda.

Even if she was absolutely in the wrong in every way imaginable, she is who you decided to have kids with. I went through a phase where I wore myself the fuck out much less anyone else within earshot and it was debilitating. As a means of avoiding the "what happened' conversation I started vocalizing positive things about my ex when the subject or any tangent to that subject came up. A remarkable thing happened. Women found that compelling.

I was having lunch with a nurse I had met that was far too young and far to attractive for what most people would assume a guy with my general attributes would pull. I said something offhand and her eyes sparkled. She put her hand on mine and said I really like the way you talk about your ex-wife.

It has messed up the line for me now because it feels fake now but it was genuine then.

Unless you are an idiot or a masochist you loved that woman for a definable reason. Perhaps you were delusional and she was never actually the person that you loved. Kind of sounds like it. Pretend she was. Pretend she died. Not in some horrible, vengeance-filled, retribution-from-on-high manner, give her a quick, painless, maybe funny death. Pretend you miss her. Because you miss the version of her, even if that was never real.

 

[Sinny]

He started off as a woman.

http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?p=14770143#post14770143

Oh, crap! He started as a "cute girl" with an email address. Posted on Lit. What. The. Hell. Like his wife won't find that.

http://forum.literotica.com/showpost.php?p=14766926&postcount=2

Hey im a cute 20 year old girl from indiana. My fiance and I are looking for someone to help us have some fun. We are both very good looking. I am about 5 foot 4 with blonde hair.I wear a d cup and weigh about 140. My fiance is 6 foot 2, and has a 7 inch dick. Trust me ladies, he can please. LOL. He has dark hair and blue eyes. My fantacy Is to watch him with another woman one day. we want to start out with phone play however. He does it all. He loves to lick pussy, but he also knows how to make a girl feel loved. His dick is very thick. He deffinately knows how to work that tongue. We really want to let loose and enjoy being young. I am open for anything. We want each other to have fun. We have even discused the idea of another couple. But of course for now we will settle for a little phone fun. Oh and he always tells me how amazed he is that my pussy is so tight. It doesnt matter how hard or long he bangs me, it always stays tight. Sometimes it even gets tighter the next day. Basically, we are a very kinky couple looking for someone to help us out. If you are a hot chick looking to get off by an amazing big cock, then give us an email. He does wonders for you on the phone. And maybe one day he can show you in person. Im a very sharing person. LOL
rf805@yahoo.com
Please title mail erotica

 

[dolf]

http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y203/Ninapearl/smilies/train-wreck-o_zps26a90404.gif

 

[parodyluvr75]

He also replied to female dom seeking female sub but edited it later.

 

[Sinny]

That was the advice I was going to give you. No woman who plays the sympathetic ear for you is going to find you attractive. Yes you will need to vent, but think about prioritizing your social interactions.

Your post before the edit was spot on. The advice to avoid trash talking exes was exactly right. It poisons children, they simply don't need to hear that ugliness. I just couldn't give any respect to a man who would talk that way about the mother of his children.

 

[Que Va]

Your post before the edit was spot on. The advice to avoid trash talking exes was exactly right. It poisons children, they simply don't need to hear that ugliness. I just couldn't give any respect to a man who would talk that way about the mother of his children.

(I should switch back but this ID will be fine, it is an openly acknowledged alter-ego.)

I give that hard-earned advice to all of the shell-shocked soon to be divorced men. I only edited because, well, I am thinking he isn't ready.

Funny your phrasing. Now with out context, I'll give the line. As a way of making it clear that I am single, without sounding bitter, or using the word divorce I developed a mental hiccup that helped me. Because she had been my first and we were together one week say of twenty years from our first date, at the time ALL of my stories had her in them somewhere, it seemed like. I really hated saying "my Ex" (still do) since I had never planned to have one of those.

I would say, "In happier times, the lovely mother of my children and I used to...." I think I was getting mileage out of that unwittingly. When it was pointed out to me it is a panty dropper I had to watch overusing it.

As far as saying things in front of the kids I am still walking back some much regretted intemperate remarks. It does not matter whose fault it is, it is not their fault, and you cannot put them in a position of needing to take a side.