Distance Domination-Support Thread

[DomWharfsBitch]

Well I have a task to complete for my Master tomorrow, which involves me going shopping..... so that will be fun.

May try and catch up with some friends, though I had one stay all last weekend so am quite happy to have a quiet one and just potter around the house and garden (depending on the weather!)

How was lunch today?

I had a task for master so I got it done before anything else tonight...I hope that you have fun shopping..

I hear you about liking the quiet and hope you can have it that way this weekend..

Lunch was nice..was good to spend about 45 minutes with master

 

[minx1]

I had a task for master so I got it done before anything else tonight...I hope that you have fun shopping..

I hear you about liking the quiet and hope you can have it that way this weekend..

Lunch was nice..was good to spend about 45 minutes with master

oh thats great hon.....and you will get to spend some time over the weekend too?

 

[DomWharfsBitch]

oh thats great hon.....and you will get to spend some time over the weekend too?

I hope that we will but I don't know yet..He told me he would see me tomorrow when we parted at lunch so I hope we do see each other

 

[minx1]

I hope that we will but I don't know yet..He told me he would see me tomorrow when we parted at lunch so I hope we do see each other

Hey hon, hope you are having a good weekend and that you got to see your Master today

 

[DomWharfsBitch]

Hey hon, hope you are having a good weekend and that you got to see your Master today

Hey Hon

My weekend is okay so far..Got to see Master for about 10 minutes this morning before I had to go run errands...But he is off Monday and I am too so we will be able to spend time together...So I look forward to that!

how is your weekend going? Did you do your shopping yet?

 

[minx1]

Hey Hon

My weekend is okay so far..Got to see Master for about 10 minutes this morning before I had to go run errands...But he is off Monday and I am too so we will be able to spend time together...So I look forward to that!

how is your weekend going? Did you do your shopping yet?

oh thats great hon...roll on Monday eh!

Yes *laugh* I went on my little shopping trip...now I have to complete the next part of the task and write about it

I think I will eat now though as its getting late and have a bath and write first thing tomorrow morning.

I was just reading some of the first email exchanges my Master and I had last year......oh my, they make me laugh! My naivety is something else! *laugh*

 

[DomWharfsBitch]

oh thats great hon...roll on Monday eh!

Yes *laugh* I went on my little shopping trip...now I have to complete the next part of the task and write about it

I think I will eat now though as its getting late and have a bath and write first thing tomorrow morning.

I was just reading some of the first email exchanges my Master and I had last year......oh my, they make me laugh! My naivety is something else! *laugh*

Yes Monday get her soon! LOL...

Glad that you went on your shopping trip and got what was requested and hope you finish up and have a fun time writing about it..

I just ate..I had peas and cornbread for my supper..was so good..LOL..

I like to go back and read Master and I's earlier emails too..I have grown so much since the beginning.LOL...I also like to go back and read Archived messages of our talks on Yahoo

 

[minx1]

Yes Monday get her soon! LOL...

Glad that you went on your shopping trip and got what was requested and hope you finish up and have a fun time writing about it..

I just ate..I had peas and cornbread for my supper..was so good..LOL..

I like to go back and read Master and I's earlier emails too..I have grown so much since the beginning.LOL...I also like to go back and read Archived messages of our talks on Yahoo

Yeah me too. Except I learnt the hard way to backup all my files, when my laptop broke and I lost all our archived IM conversations.

I was devastated...I know some might think thats daft, but I really was cut up. It had our first conversation on it, when I first became his and generally our journey over about 6 months

I love reading his words. I find them really comforting sometimes when I am missing him or just need to feel close to him.

Hope Monday comes round really quickly for you *hugs*

now.....think I will have pizza! *grin*

 

[DomWharfsBitch]

Yeah me too. Except I learnt the hard way to backup all my files, when my laptop broke and I lost all our archived IM conversations.

I was devastated...I know some might think thats daft, but I really was cut up. It had our first conversation on it, when I first became his and generally our journey over about 6 months

I love reading his words. I find them really comforting sometimes when I am missing him or just need to feel close to him.

Hope Monday comes round really quickly for you *hugs*

now.....think I will have pizza! *grin*

No I don't think that is daft at all..I would have been upset too...

Yes the words are very comforting when we are missing them..I have a piece of thread that we have used in play that I keep tied to my key chain I can rub at times when I am missing HIM really bad..

Thanks hon! I appreciate that *hugs*

Pizza sounds YUMMY

 

[minx1]

No I don't think that is daft at all..I would have been upset too...

Yes the words are very comforting when we are missing them..I have a piece of thread that we have used in play that I keep tied to my key chain I can rub at times when I am missing HIM really bad..

Thanks hon! I appreciate that *hugs*

Pizza sounds YUMMY

I wish I had something like that .......I read on here about some subbies who have a shirt of their Masters or something. God I would LOVE that! *laugh*
Just for those moments....

Though to be honest I just need to get there now and spend some time with him. God to touch him...

 

[xxbadshychickxx]

im driving myslef crazy.
i havent talked to my Owner for about 3 weeks now.
and i havent recived any emails either.
and its starting to get to me.
more so the past couple days then ever.
each time my phone rings i jump hopeing that its him

and its not

i dident to anything bad....
or at least i hope i dident.....

i dont know what to do
all i can do is sit and wait....

and now i think that i am going to take a nap
thanks for letting me ramble on

 

[DomWharfsBitch]

I wish I had something like that .......I read on here about some subbies who have a shirt of their Masters or something. God I would LOVE that! *laugh*
Just for those moments....

Though to be honest I just need to get there now and spend some time with him. God to touch him...

Yes I have read about them having their Master's shirt..that would be awesome to have to smell them and wrap ourselves in it..Exaclty just for those moments..

I hear you about needing to be there with our Masters..would be heavenly but oh so hard to part..

 

[minx1]

Yes I have read about them having their Master's shirt..that would be awesome to have to smell them and wrap ourselves in it..Exaclty just for those moments..

I hear you about needing to be there with our Masters..would be heavenly but oh so hard to part..

*smile* I know and it seems silly sometimes to worry about parting before you even get there! But I already have done and how awful leaving would be!

 

[DomWharfsBitch]

*smile* I know and it seems silly sometimes to worry about parting before you even get there! But I already have done and how awful leaving would be!

Yeah I guess it does sound silly but it can't be helped you know..LOL..I would be crying my eyes out and so upset..

 

[minx1]

Yeah I guess it does sound silly but it can't be helped you know..LOL..I would be crying my eyes out and so upset..

OMG me too! Well guess we'd just have to stay then........lol

Unless he told me to go home of course!

 

[DomWharfsBitch]

OMG me too! Well guess we'd just have to stay then........lol

Unless he told me to go home of course!

LOL..hey that sounds good to me...

Oh I don't think he would tell you to go home..he wouldn't want you to leave either!

 

[minx1]

LOL..hey that sounds good to me...

Oh I don't think he would tell you to go home..he wouldn't want you to leave either!

*wide smile* I hope so hon! and I know the same would go for yours! How do you around the distance thing? Do you make plans?

 

[DomWharfsBitch]

*wide smile* I hope so hon! and I know the same would go for yours! How do you around the distance thing? Do you make plans?

Glad to see you smiling hon!! Yes the same would go for mine too I know..We just make the most of our time together when we can and I try not to think of the distance which is hard sometimes you know...we have not made any plans yet but I know we will..

 

[minx1]

Glad to see you smiling hon!! Yes the same would go for mine too I know..We just make the most of our time together when we can and I try not to think of the distance which is hard sometimes you know...we have not made any plans yet but I know we will..

*hugs* well you do wonderfully well hon and even just knowing that you will make plans to meet helps eh!

ok I am finding it difficult to type now I am so tired! *laugh*

I think I will go and chill for a bit before bed. Its been great chatting DWB!

See you soon and take care

 

[DomWharfsBitch]

*hugs* well you do wonderfully well hon and even just knowing that you will make plans to meet helps eh!

ok I am finding it difficult to type now I am so tired! *laugh*

I think I will go and chill for a bit before bed. Its been great chatting DWB!

See you soon and take care

Thanks hon! I do try to be optimistic...

I am about to get off here and watch some tv or pop a movie in myself..

It has been great talking to you tonight!!

Have a great night..sweet dreams!!

 

[littleone77]

Someone please...

I was gone for about a week. During that time my Sir sought out a female sub on Lit to ask questions. Questions about how best to be a Sir and to give me what I supposedly need. Never once has he asked me those questions, just her. I feel hurt, anger and humiliation. In one of his emails to me he said that he knows now that I am normal. Ack.

This is totally new to me. Always before in relationships he and I have asked the other if questions, concerns rose. If there was a need after that we sought out a third party. Now I feel as if our whole relationship is going to be tainted with her opinion or perception. How can I trust him or his actions? And make him understand what exactly he has made me feel.

I feel hopeless.

 

[serijules]

I was gone for about a week. During that time my Sir sought out a female sub on Lit to ask questions. Questions about how best to be a Sir and to give me what I supposedly need. Never once has he asked me those questions, just her. I feel hurt, anger and humiliation. In one of his emails to me he said that he knows now that I am normal. Ack.

This is totally new to me. Always before in relationships he and I have asked the other if questions, concerns rose. If there was a need after that we sought out a third party. Now I feel as if our whole relationship is going to be tainted with her opinion or perception. How can I trust him or his actions? And make him understand what exactly he has made me feel.

I feel hopeless.

Let me ask you this...if you are/were a parent and you were feeling unsure about your parenting techniques and wanting advice to try to understand your kids better, would you ask them?

Probably not. You would likely be afraid of looking less authoritative in their eyes.

I think it's hard for dominants to admit they are not perfect sometimes, that they don't know it all or understand it all. I often take concerns I have about my relationship to my Owners other submissive before I approach her with them, to get another perspective and help sort out my thoughts so that what I bring to Ma'am is really how I feel and not just emotional outbursts. I rarely take my issues to strangers, granted, but I don't think his actions are as big of a betrayal as you seem to be feeling, but perhaps moreso just a misjudgment. That's just my opinion though, not dismissing your feelings.

Tell him how his actions hurt you and work with him to resolve this rather than take the same course he did and look to others for advice on what ultimately comes down to his actions and feelings...something no one but him can help you understand and vice versa. Any advice we give you could possibly taint the outcome of how you react to his words on the matter, couldn't it? So it's a two way street really...if you both are committed to communicating your feelings and listening to the other, others' advice shouldn't impact the results and if it does, perhaps that is a red flag and an area to focus on improving.


Good luck.

 

[littleone77]

Thank You.

I understand your analogy of the parenting technique. But at the same time, after receiving the advice you would not tell the child "so and so told me to do this to you." Plus the situations are different but I am being childish about this. I do not expect him to be the alpha male all the time. He is not God nor do I expect that. I do however want him to ask me first instead of another over what is best for me. *sighs*

He is well aware of my feelings on this. He has yet to do anything about it. I do not want to wait for him to figure it out either. There is a difference between asking advice concerning something like this and something basic like collaring or bdsm.

You have helped and for that I am grateful.

Let me ask you this...if you are/were a parent and you were feeling unsure about your parenting techniques and wanting advice to try to understand your kids better, would you ask them?

Probably not. You would likely be afraid of looking less authoritative in their eyes.

I think it's hard for dominants to admit they are not perfect sometimes, that they don't know it all or understand it all. I often take concerns I have about my relationship to my Owners other submissive before I approach her with them, to get another perspective and help sort out my thoughts so that what I bring to Ma'am is really how I feel and not just emotional outbursts. I rarely take my issues to strangers, granted, but I don't think his actions are as big of a betrayal as you seem to be feeling, but perhaps moreso just a misjudgment. That's just my opinion though, not dismissing your feelings.

Tell him how his actions hurt you and work with him to resolve this rather than take the same course he did and look to others for advice on what ultimately comes down to his actions and feelings...something no one but him can help you understand and vice versa. Any advice we give you could possibly taint the outcome of how you react to his words on the matter, couldn't it? So it's a two way street really...if you both are committed to communicating your feelings and listening to the other, others' advice shouldn't impact the results and if it does, perhaps that is a red flag and an area to focus on improving.


Good luck.

 

[serijules]

Thank You.

I understand your analogy of the parenting technique. But at the same time, after receiving the advice you would not tell the child "so and so told me to do this to you." Plus the situations are different but I am being childish about this. I do not expect him to be the alpha male all the time. He is not God nor do I expect that. I do however want him to ask me first instead of another over what is best for me. *sighs*

He is well aware of my feelings on this. He has yet to do anything about it. I do not want to wait for him to figure it out either. There is a difference between asking advice concerning something like this and something basic like collaring or bdsm.

You have helped and for that I am grateful.

No, you are right, you wouldn't tell the child "so and so told me to do this to you" but I assumed we know we ARE talking about adults here despite the analogy and so communications are expected to be more detailed. I often compare the dynamic of D/s to parent/child because the control and trust involved is very similar, even if the actual people are not.

You are right in that he should have asked you first for what is best for you, but he made a mistake...does he realize that? Does he understand your hurt? Has he indicated he will make efforts to work with YOU on this instead of others? Those are all important things and while he may not have done anything about it yet, he may just need the time to process not only what you are feeling but perhaps any embarrassment he is feeling as well. I know my own Ma'am and I often are at odds because I like to talk about things NOW and she tends to take far more time thinking them out to herself before discussion than I am comfortable with. We deal We fight too. LOL

btw, for what it's worth, nothing in BDSM is basic, certainly not collaring and obviously not feelings and emotions. Your hurt is valid and very understandable, but so is his mistake.

I hope it works out for you.

 

[littleone77]

*smiles* Yep. We are on the same path concerning the parenting analogy. For me its quite apt due to the nature of our relationship and the rather large age difference between us. Trust is a tricky thing. This has def. rocked that a bit...not cracked it but nudged it.

You are right in that I do not think he has fully realized what his 'mistake' has caused. I am willing to guess by the time he gets online Tuesday he will get a nice clear picture of that. Nothing is ever simple in life, especially in this world where everything is based on trust and instinct. (Please excuse the generalization in the last bit).

This is just one of those times when I want to get on a box or a stool, get eye level with him and tell him exactly what I think of his q and a with a woman who claims to be a sub and cannot spell to save her life.

There. I feel better.

No, you are right, you wouldn't tell the child "so and so told me to do this to you" but I assumed we know we ARE talking about adults here despite the analogy and so communications are expected to be more detailed. I often compare the dynamic of D/s to parent/child because the control and trust involved is very similar, even if the actual people are not.

You are right in that he should have asked you first for what is best for you, but he made a mistake...does he realize that? Does he understand your hurt? Has he indicated he will make efforts to work with YOU on this instead of others? Those are all important things and while he may not have done anything about it yet, he may just need the time to process not only what you are feeling but perhaps any embarrassment he is feeling as well. I know my own Ma'am and I often are at odds because I like to talk about things NOW and she tends to take far more time thinking them out to herself before discussion than I am comfortable with. We deal We fight too. LOL

btw, for what it's worth, nothing in BDSM is basic, certainly not collaring and obviously not feelings and emotions. Your hurt is valid and very understandable, but so is his mistake.

I hope it works out for you.