Distance Domination-Support Thread

[FluteMaster]

yeah congrats Itw and FM.

My Master is the same myinnerslut, funny considering we met here *laugh*
He comes on very rarely...the last time was about a month ago.

Though I know its because of the limited time we get together....he says when we have the time he wants to spend it with me and not here!

Thanks Minx.

Of course, there is a lot of talk that goes on "behind the scenes" with E-mails and Yahoo. However, as we met in conversation on the forum and have threads we still post to we thought it would be good to have a thread where we always met up.

In addition, the time difference isn't as difficult for us.

 

[minx1]

A once said that this was my place to vent, to learn, adn to feel free to express my opinions without fearing his reaction or editing myself due to his presence

Yeah my Master has pretty much said the said the same and actively encourages me to come on here and chat and share...particularly with other subs

 

[FurryFury]

Wow!

There's been so much posting on this thread. I can't keep up!

LOL.

*smiles* well with all due respect, Fury, P IS in control of me, and basically i AM co-dependent on Him, that is the dynamic of our relationship....though i do understand how it's not right for you, but that doesn't make it 'unhealthy' for me and Him, is what i was saying. and also, you have a primary relationship besides your Dom, i on the other hand, have P, which is my primary relationship, i don't have someone else to fill in the gaps or whatever. i don't think you were putting me down, but the last post did feel as if you were saying what we were doing is unhealthy...*shrugs* different strokes for different folks i suppose

I never said it was unhealthy for you and P. I said it would feel unhealthy to me.

Just as what you say applies to what you feel and that you are not judging others or telling them how to do, that is also how my comments are meant. It should be clear in how I say things like "for me" or "to me" you know?

Having someone else to fill in the gaps really doesn't have a lot to do with it IMO. I mean you have kids, friends and family, same as I do. These people are all important in our lives. I may be different in that I have a husband and an online Dom but the real difference is what we all seek from the other person in our lives, IMO.

I also suspect that our definitions of co-dependency and control may be different. I'm sure our needs in those areas are. That doesn't mean one of us is right and the other wrong. I'm not trying to one up anyone on having a better relationship. I don't know anyone intimately enough to do that even if I wanted to. In any case I don't want to.

exactly!

im in a bit off a blah mood and missing A bad right now

Aww, I'm sorry.

*hug*

i did it...i took an easy way out by emailing Him, telling Him that there was something i would like to discuss and to please ask me...we did and i was reminded He can't fix things unless he knows...now, however i am left with more questions, worries and what ifs than before...trying to accept something that maybe i shouldn't even try to *sighs*

suddenly MP's idea of a blog or a journal sounds tempting

I created one...put things into reality. Thank you MP.

I'm glad you found a way and the courage to let him know. Communication is the only way to do that work things out and it can be so hard at times. Keep it up and I'm sure you'll both feel better and better about things. You have to keep trying though.

*hug*

Congrats on the first step!

Hello all,

I just got back from a weekend with pet and of course I am now depressed and feeling lonely. We had a wonderful time together in and out of the bedroom (yes we left the hotel room for a few hours!)

I missed a lot of conversation on here and I don't have the energy to catch up right now, maybe later.

I hope you are all doing well.
SD

Man! I'm so sorry!

*HUGS*

I think that's it exactly. I was very gunshy when I met Jounar. The last year I was married I did everything to keep my husband in my sight because I sinced he was loosing interest. I wanted to spend all of my time with him so that no one else could. Of course this just caused more problems.

So when Jounar came along, and I found myslef falling for him it was even more difficult. Not only could I not know what he was doing every second of the day, but I didn't know when I'd be able to physically be with him or even chat with him most of the time. It took a lot of trust in him, and in us for me to get over the feelings that he was more than likely with another there and playing with me when he had a free moment. I was very insecure and it nearly tore us apart a few times.

But I love him, and I've grown to trust him more than I have anyone in my life. And our time is more special now, I think, because I'm not spending the moments we are not chatting thinking about him messing with some other girl. I can focus on him and on us, rather than my own insucurities and unfounded suspicions.

That makes total sense to me!

First of all, its really interesting to hear about the differences in peoples LD relationships and I find it heartwarming to hear whatever the dynamics, that in the main they work really well. For someone like me who is in the early stages of one, its a great comfort.

I see a lot of myself in you Fury, though it hasn't always been that way. `

In many of my more serious RL relationships including my marriage I think it was always the case that I wanted to be with that person every hour of every day and like wench, that need was often made worse with the feeling that my partner was losing interest. In my case I think they wanted different things and saw me as being needy...and ironically I knew I was pushing them further away, yet the more they backed off, the more I clung on for dear life!

I think I learnt to my cost...when I left my husband a couple of years ago, I had lost all my friends, infact I had lost everything.
In the two years since I left I spent time getting new jobs, moving house, making new friends and repairing the damage with old ones and more importantly getting my confidence back.
Now I am in a LDR with my my Master and really happy, yet I know that if I ever moved to be near him I would never want to return to my old ways of thinking....being with him every moment of every day. He has a life and family and other interests and importantly, so do I.
I have changed a lot, and I love my independence (lol does that sound daft for a sub?!) and my new found confidence and my 'me' time.

It doesn't come naturally to me to think like that *laugh*

I think my personality will always mean I'm prevalent to those feeling...a bit like an addict really *smile*...they will always be there, but for me, I will always try to keep a balance. No one knows what happens in the future and I will never be in the situation where I was left with nothing again.
Besides I love my life now

It sounds like you have made some tough choices and are happier for it.

*hugs*

Go you!

Well, I'm not exactly a newbie on Lit, but I feel that somehow I'm introducing myself from scratch.

I discovered my interest in D/s and BDSM through a LDR with someone in the US, (to be fair, we discovered a mutual interest), and from that I learnt that I also like to write. However, that relationship ended after about 5 months last Summer, and since then I had been "subless" for a while.

A little while into the new year, however, I found a new partner in kink, also based in the US. It's tough, of course, and not for the faint hearted. But, when the right person comes along and you click....

So, with that intro, I am sure that we will be adding our own thoughts and experiences to those of everyone else on this brilliant thread.

That time difference between the States and England can be rrrrough. I happen to know.

I'm glad you've found someone you click with though.

Ok, deep breath. I'm somewhat new here around here. I discovered my interest in D/s not too long ago, and I lurked in this forum for a long time before posting.

I think that's my cue. I feel very lucky to have met someone with whom I click, but not so lucky that he's so far away. So here we are.

Aha!

Another happy couple in the thread.

*sighs and smiles*

Congrats!

Fury

 

[myinnerslut]

Aww, I'm sorry.

*hug*

thank you

its always rough having to walk away from A, knowing i wont see him again for months... i guess i just have to deal, but that doesnt mean i can always stop myself from moping a bit as im dealing

 

[FluteMaster]

That time difference between the States and England can be rrrrough. I happen to know.

I'm glad you've found someone you click with though.

Yep - it is, but c'st la vie.

and thanks for the kind words.

 

[minx1]

Hey we are on the same train. *passes the bottle of whiskey*

Please can I have a sip?

Today I miss him sooooo much, even though we spent time together.

I'd have chewed my own arm off to be with him! *laugh*

 

[myinnerslut]

I'd have chewed my own arm off to be with him! *laugh*

ewww.... messy!!!

 

[intothewoods]

Thanks, everyone, for the kind thoughts.

A once said that this was my place to vent, to learn, adn to feel free to express my opinions without fearing his reaction or editing myself due to his presence

Oh, that's what emails to my girlfriends are for! Kidding, kidding.

As FM said, we did meet here and, he was on here before me. We both have our own things to say, I think.

 

[lil_slave_rose]

Do you know, I can really relate to that...I was shy with him at first, though now sometimes even though I'mnot...I'm quiet just because I'm listening to his voice...the tones, the inflections..*sigh*

Funny considering the distance we don't have crackles!

LOL i'm not ever quiet, hehe, i pretty much 'dominante' the conversation (haha) most of the time, except during 'play' then i will very rarely say anything except, yes Sir, Pleeeeeeeeease Sir, or certain other things *giggles*

 

[lil_slave_rose]

on both partners posting on Lit, Master and i do, as everyone knows and for the most part it's not been a problem, until recently when he made a thread about the way he was feeling with something that he didn't realize he had already told me, but that was the only problem we've ran into so far, i don't have a problem posting my questions or whatever for advice on certain things, because before i post them on here, we've pretty much already discussed it and i'm just looking for other opinions and views.

 

[FurryFury]

thank you

its always rough having to walk away from A, knowing i wont see him again for months... i guess i just have to deal, but that doesnt mean i can always stop myself from moping a bit as im dealing

I don't blame you a bit. I think anyone would feel that way.

Yep - it is, but c'st la vie.

and thanks for the kind words.

You're very welcome!

Fury

 

[minx1]

ewww.... messy!!!

*giggles* Ouch!! and a bit sore!!!

 

[minx1]

on both partners posting on Lit, Master and i do, as everyone knows and for the most part it's not been a problem, until recently when he made a thread about the way he was feeling with something that he didn't realize he had already told me, but that was the only problem we've ran into so far, i don't have a problem posting my questions or whatever for advice on certain things, because before i post them on here, we've pretty much already discussed it and i'm just looking for other opinions and views.

I think its kinda nice that both of you come on Lit...as a secret lurker, I have enjoyed both your postings and at times as I said earlier I have actually found it comforting, not to mention very sweet

I know that there will be times when my Master will come on...though I'm guessing it will be usually when I am in bed or at work lol, but if we 'bump' into eachother here that will be lovely too.

I think you are right Rose....that its all down to communication with one another, I 've got myself into the habit now of asking him if I'm thinking of starting a thread...mainly because it will involve him!

 

[FluteMaster]

I'd have chewed my own arm off to be with him! *laugh*

I also suspect that he would be a tad upset at losing such a vital part of you...

 

[FluteMaster]

As FM said, we did meet here and, he was on here before me. We both have our own things to say, I think.

And to be honest, you find all sorts of interesting threads and I love reading the comments you post.

 

[minx1]

Felt really great today...My Master D called. Only thing was he called while I was underground on my way to a meeting so I missed him.....bummer!

Except of course and wenchy you might appreciate this...he left a voicemail...so I get to hear him for three days! *laugh*

Its almost worth 'missing' calls on purpose....
(I know you will read this and I am only joking! )

 

[Sprinkles22]

Felt really great today...My Master D called. Only thing was he called while I was underground on my way to a meeting so I missed him.....bummer!

Except of course and wenchy you might appreciate this...he left a voicemail...so I get to hear him for three days! *laugh*

Its almost worth 'missing' calls on purpose....
(I know you will read this and I am only joking! )

*smiles and nods* Uh huh .... it sure is

Hearing a special voice anytime you want to is wonderful. It can make a bad day turn good.

 

[minx1]

*smiles and nods* Uh huh .... it sure is

Hearing a special voice anytime you want to is wonderful. It can make a bad day turn good.

*giggles* ssshh Sprinkles you are filling my mind with naughty thoughts.

Yup I can feel a plan coming together here......Just keep it to yourself ok

 

[Sprinkles22]

*giggles* ssshh Sprinkles you are filling my mind with naughty thoughts.

Yup I can feel a plan coming together here......Just keep it to yourself ok

My Motto:

I hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil

Ok, well maybe that's a little white lie .... but your secret is safe with me

 

[minx1]

My Motto:

I hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil

Ok, well maybe that's a little white lie .... but your secret is safe with me

*grins* my kinda girl

He'll never notice anyway....too busy peeking at the AM pics

 

[Sprinkles22]

*grins* my kinda girl

*giggles* you must like t-r-o-u-b-l-e spelled with a Capital *T

 

[minx1]

*giggles* you must like t-r-o-u-b-l-e spelled with a Capital *T

*giggles* Its the ONLY way to spell it!

'Oh yeah we got trouble right here in lit city....' *sniggers*

 

[Sprinkles22]

*giggles* Its the ONLY way to spell it!

'Oh yeah we got trouble right here in lit city....' *sniggers*

*rolls eyes* Ain't that the truth?? Have you seen the General Board??? That place scares me!!!

My opinion on *Trouble* is that I like to BE it, not CAUSE it

 

[minx1]

*rolls eyes* Ain't that the truth?? Have you seen the General Board??? That place scares me!!!

My opinion on *Trouble* is that I like to BE it, not CAUSE it

Yeah me too!! There was one thread about hating the British......I nearly contributed, but then saw sense and chickened out!! *gulp*

I kinda figured they weren't the kind to listen to a reasoned argument

 

[Sprinkles22]

Yeah me too!! There was one thread about hating the British......I nearly contributed, but then saw sense and chickened out!! *gulp*

I kinda figured they weren't the kind to listen to a reasoned argument

Reason? OMG ... that's unheard of over there!!!!

They will chew you up and spit you out on those threads. It makes me realize what a *nice girl* I really am