Dirty talk

[jupiter lilly]

Sometimes talking dirty just doesn't come easy to people.
My partner and I have good comunications in our relationship and feel comfortable expressing feelings.
I know he wouldn't talk dirty to me in bed but we both love to read sex stories.
Now we read sex stories to each other and I find it a huge turn on.
I can't have the dirty talk but I do get the chance to share the experiance of stories together.

Wow...that's a good idea...I enjoy dirty talk on occasion, but I don't think my guy would get into it too much...at least not to the degree that some of you are describing...

but the idea of reading sex stories to each other is incredibly arousing...I can just imagine hearing all those naughty ideas in his voice...yum!

 

[SlvrTongueDevil]

She loves hearing dirty talk when she gets worked up ... but it's a threshold thing. Can't start too early.

 

[ridddder]

My opinion

Why is it embarassing? If you are intimate, and have sex why is sex embarassing? When ever I have done so, it has been with someone I totally trusted, that I was as comfortable lying naked as was with washing their ass in the shower. If you know someone well enough they it is easy to share such intimacy, if you don't then well perhaps you both need to grow as a couple to get to that point in being just that close. However, even more than this I think confidence, self confidence means just as much. If you aren't able to do the same, how can you expect someone else to show you that kind of trust, confidence, and intimacy.
Lastly, it is about being open, discussing feelings, sharing thoughts, ideas, and fantasies. If you were raised to not show your emotions, if you are afraid to cry in front of your gf, if you can't share just simple feelings, then you may never be ready to be dirty for someone you care about because you will not let them into your inner soul.

 

[Phoenix Stone]

We're all different ridddder. some people show their inner soul without words. We're not all talking types. Admittedly most literotica folks like to communicate with words or we wouldn't be here. but some of us are involved with folks who are more visual or tactile/kinesthetic. words just don't do it for these folks or feel awkward and unreal.

I'm not speaking for all who have posted here. I'm sure there are people for whom your words will have resonance and meaning and be helpful. Just want to point out that it's not always a matter of embarrassment or lack of intimacy that stops people from talking.

For me, married for a long time to someone who isn't naturally a talker, it's important to figure out how to get my need for words met. Also, I realized after reading this thread that it wasn't that I was looking for talk, or even dirty talk, during sex, it was certain types of talk. For instance, turns out I like commands, and having the other person kind of state the obvious, such as saying, 'you love that when i XYZ, don't you?'

And when I'm doing my husband's bidding, I shut up during sex. Which I don't mind at all, if He would just talk. lol

Hey, we can't be compatible in All ways, can we? (Or if we can, we just got Darn lucky. ) So, how do we work out compromises, or alternatives that work for both? Maybe I should start a thread on that?

 

[SlvrTongueDevil]

For me, married for a long time to someone who isn't naturally a talker, it's important to figure out how to get my need for words met. Also, I realized after reading this thread that it wasn't that I was looking for talk, or even dirty talk, during sex, it was certain types of talk. For instance, turns out I like commands, and having the other person kind of state the obvious, such as saying, 'you love that when i XYZ, don't you?'

And when I'm doing my husband's bidding, I shut up during sex. Which I don't mind at all, if He would just talk. lol

Hey, we can't be compatible in All ways, can we? (Or if we can, we just got Darn lucky. ) So, how do we work out compromises, or alternatives that work for both? Maybe I should start a thread on that?

I wouldn't say you're necessarily incompatible with your husband on this ... maybe he just doesn't realize what it would do for you. Maybe a sly seductive comment.

 

[ecstacey]

dirty talk is always good. but if rushed to quickly it can be a totally turn off.

 

[sheath]

Re: Re: Dirty talk

Hi, me Too!! Only problem is, I Have asked and slavegirl is about as far as he'll go. One thing he liked, and that we'll try again, is when I play voice-activated sextoy (or slavegirl or whatever.) he says it, I do it. He stops talking, I stop moving. (Only with my guy we this is more a foreplay and masturbation thing because he doesn't care if I move at all once he gets his hands on me. He loves to watch though, so I'm playing on this.)

Huh...VERY cool idea!



To the original question, talking dirty...

Talk about it first, maybe, in a non-sexual setting. Bring up the difference between what words mean when they are uttered in bed, and what they mean when they are spoken in other situations. Then at least he knows you don't mind being called a slut or a whore when you're having sex with him.

When you are actually in bed, then you can prompt him and see just how naughty he can get.

S.

 

[Stiffy Says...]

On the same vein...

Wow...that's a good idea...I enjoy dirty talk on occasion, but I don't think my guy would get into it too much...at least not to the degree that some of you are describing...

but the idea of reading sex stories to each other is incredibly arousing...I can just imagine hearing all those naughty ideas in his voice...yum!

Perhaps sharing movies, with those not so subtle hints being let out when the guy talks dirty to her (O my god, thjat just made me so wet), etc would help too.

When I was first starting relations with ladies, I admit, they had a handful of weird emotions of mine to deal with. I wanted to talk, wanted to smack her ass, but feared it wildly as I had been physically and somewhat emotionally abused as a child. Spankings are especially hard for me to dole out, due to the fact that those were used as punishment when I was a bad kid.

Patience and commitment are all I can suggest, just like so many others in this thread.

 

[Lailarenna]

My guy absolutely loves it when I talk dirty, so I do my best to oblige, although I have a tendency to get tongue tied. Not sexy. Lol. Usually I do fine unless he says "Don't hold back, be filthy." I know it's meant as encouragement to go that extra little bit, but as soon as he says that my mind goes completely blank, can't think of a thing to say. I mean insert Jeopardy theme song here. Part of the problem is I think I'll sound ridiculous if I venture into the aforementioned "cum slut" territory.

So, um, any help overcoming mental blocks? lol

 

[Mskey]

I actually got to test this out a little bit the other night. emboldened more by where we were then anything I suddenly seemed to be able to find inspiration to let myself really talk dirty.
I was giving hubby a blowjob and I suddenly stopped and simply started to manually stimulate him while pinching his poor nipples. I got up really close and started to whisper in his ear,
" Why are you so frustrated? Did you want me to finish sucking your cock baby? Hmmm? Did you want to feel my lips sliding over the head, my tongue teasing against your balls as you slide down into the back of my throat and fuck my mouth like you were fucking my pussy?"
WOW! I've never seen him come so totally alive like that before. All of a sudden my usually very quiet husband was moaning and talking and making all sorts of wonderful noises which only made things better for me. By the time I was ready to cum I was quite vocal, looking him in the eyes and telling exactly how to fuck me, exactly how I wanted him to cum for me. It was absolutley exhilirating!!

Even so, I will say that I don't think dirty talk is something I could bring out for every sexual encounter. The mood, the setting, the moment have to be just right in order for me to not feel as if I'm forcing it. It can be great under the right circumstances and with the right person, but without that it's to much of a chore to make it enjoyable.

Oh and Phoenix....that voice activated sextoy idea has such delightful potential.

 

[Derya]

Ahhh, ok then. How about a guy that doesn't say a word?
The most I have ever gotten out of him is "oh god baby, that feels good", when I was sucking his dick. And in response to me telling/asking him to talk to me "I want to hear every little moan you make". That's it. No "oh god, I'm cumming". NOT A DAMN THING!!!!

I love talk both playful fun and dirty talk and the guy I'm currently involved with doesn't say a thing....hardly makes a sound. During one blow job session I got him to grunt and moan a little as he came and I told him I liked that...getting some sound out of him and he was just like "you do?" Regarding talking we discussed that a couple of times and he said he doesn't like to talk because it takes away his concentration and on another occasion I asked does it bother him if I talk he said "if it helps you do it". The thing is I haven't gotten to where I've shared just how intensely dirty/filthy talk turns me on....I find it more stimulating to be on the receiving end than the talking end, but maybe some suggestions I've seen here like just going for it and talking dirty myself might spur something a little. I'm sure it may not be clear that it's dirty talk I'm really seeking...at least on some occasions. If I just went for it once that might test the waters a little see if he is more inclined once some words are rolling? or at least know whether it is a complete turn off for him or not?

These suggestions are good thanks!

 

[strgzr1230]

I have been in relationships that were very quiet.....Not much intensity in the vocal area. I myself used to be embarassed to make too much noise, Moan too loud, Etc.

However, Once you find you like the dirty talk, In my case anyway, I can't imagine going back to just moans and "Oh baby that feels so good..." My partner and I might say anything in the sack, We get really raunchy. But never talk disrespectful or curse at each other out of the moment.

We are very good friends, I think that is a big part of it. And it took a couple of years to progress to this point. I can imagine if you are someone who gets into this, Being with someone timid about it would be horribly frustrating. Be patient and introduce little new things....the reading stories sounds good. Just have patience. Good luck!

 

[Phoenix Stone]

" Why are you so frustrated? Did you want me to finish sucking your cock baby? Hmmm? Did you want to feel my lips sliding over the head, my tongue teasing against your balls as you slide down into the back of my throat and fuck my mouth like you were fucking my pussy?"

I would LOVE to hear my guy say the equiv of that... sigh. lol -- saying it myself doesn't work for me because he'll just put his hand over my mouth, or whisper 'shut up slavegirl,' which is sexy... but I wish he'd keep talking, especially that kind of sweet torture you were doing. He is a moaner though, when he comes. lovely

(posting this as a hint in case he reads this post, as he doesn't like to be pushed... and he Is talking/commanding more these days. )

 

[Avery_Chisholm]

I agree. From my experience I have found that most men have a barrage of dirty things that they would like to say, they are just waiting for the green light from us dirty lil' cum sluts.

so true, i love to be told what a naughty little CUMSLUT i am it gets me sooo HOT

 

[SlvrTongueDevil]

My guy absolutely loves it when I talk dirty, so I do my best to oblige, although I have a tendency to get tongue tied. Not sexy. Lol. Usually I do fine unless he says "Don't hold back, be filthy." I know it's meant as encouragement to go that extra little bit, but as soon as he says that my mind goes completely blank, can't think of a thing to say. I mean insert Jeopardy theme song here. Part of the problem is I think I'll sound ridiculous if I venture into the aforementioned "cum slut" territory.

So, um, any help overcoming mental blocks? lol

On behalf of guys everywhere, let me just say .... let go!!

 

[kinky shy girl]

just read some of the responses I had missed...I enjoyed reading everyone's input. I especially liked the idea about reading stories together.

 

[lancewannabe]

oh, c'mon ya know you like it!

Oh.. I know for sure I like it, but was married to a shrew for 17 years that couldn't even say pussy. Dirty talk in the bedroom was as off limits as her back door... lol

 

[kinky shy girl]

oh wow, it's nice to see this thread again.

My boyfriend and I have gotten much better at the dirty talk lately. now we have no problem fantasizing about picking up a 3rd or another couple and doing naughty things with them. it's all talk (so far), but it really gets us going.

 

[SlvrTongueDevil]

oh wow, it's nice to see this thread again.

My boyfriend and I have gotten much better at the dirty talk lately. now we have no problem fantasizing about picking up a 3rd or another couple and doing naughty things with them. it's all talk (so far), but it really gets us going.

Keep talkin' kinky shy girl ... keep talkin' ....

 

[human_male]

This is one of those threads that almost makes me think all the women on here are actually guys. Or I've just lived a very sheltered life.

 

[Eilan]

This is one of those threads that almost makes me think all the women on here are actually guys. Or I've just lived a very sheltered life.

*strokes dick* Why would you say that?

 

[kinky shy girl]

*strokes dick* Why would you say that?

*chuckles* guess we can't fool some people.

 

[Theabee]

Man, I'm really dirty when I fuck... I love to call her pussy names and I hope she gets turned on by it too, and wants to tell me to fuck her that much harder.

I'm really dirty when I fuck, too. Or when I'm being licked or licking my guy. I love to tell him to fuck me, to let me have all of it, clear up to my belly. I beg him to tongue fuck me and suck my clit, and a whole lot more. I love getting as dirty as it gets. It's a HUGE turn on to me.

 

[Theabee]

This is one of those threads that almost makes me think all the women on here are actually guys. Or I've just lived a very sheltered life.

LOL Why do you think that? I LOVE talking dirty when I fuck. In fact, fuck is just about my favorite word.

 

[Theabee]

On behalf of guys everywhere, let me just say .... let go!!

Let go? Okay!

Fuck me. I want to feel your huge gorgeous cock rammed up in my hot, wet pussy so hard it feels like its in my belly.

Suck my pussy. It's hot and wet and throbbing just for you. I have to feel your tongue inside it! Fuck me with your tongue, then lick my clit. Tease it out from under its hood. Tease my pussy, baby. Tease it until it can't take anymore and it begs to be licked and sucked and fucked.

Let me cum in your mouth. I want to cum in your mouth so bad I'm almost insane with desire. I want to grind my pussy in your face until it's soaking wet with my pussy juices, then I want to straddle you and masturbate for you, very slowly, while you watch. You can't touch. Just watch as I tease my swollen, red pussy into an orgasm. Watch as I tease my clit into an erect, miniature cock. Watch as I hold my pussy lips wide open so you can see my cunt contracting wildly as I cum over and over and over again.

Something like that? Or more?