Depression. It's a silent killer.

[Wetkitty09]

I find I use this space for journaling as well. When an idea is sparked I have a place to put it down and think about it. Getting positive feedback is a bonus.
Be safe out there.
Love you.

 

[Bassytian]

I got really depressed yesterday, self-reflection tends to cause me to spiral downward. It's nothing I haven't talked about on here before, loneliness, lack of success with dating, etc.

Such is the duality of schizoid personality disorder: we crave solitude above all else and yet we get lonely. We're not born with this disorder, it's largely believed to develop in late adolescence or early adulthood and is caused by rejection by our parents and/or peers during childhood. There are other symptoms, such as having a rich and highly detailed fantasy world inside our heads, the stories I post on here are born from that world.

While I haven't really said negative things to myself, I still can't help but compare myself negatively to those who have had more success than I have when it comes to dating/hooking up, I fall short compared to literally everyone I know. I tried everything the "experts" say to do, but still failed. I gave up trying in 2011, but the humiliation stings just as much as it ever has. I really need to only post on this thread too. Any time I browse the rest of this forum, I feel even more alone, like a failure.

One thing that really bothered me was the thought "Am I the same as those 'incels' I hear about?". The thought of being anything like those hateful people nearly drove me insane. I never blamed anyone other than myself for my failures, I only recently stopped blaming myself for it. It's not my fault either, God, nature, genetics, or whatever is in charge determined that I am meant to be alone, that's all.

I'm doing better now, I'll turn this pain into strength!

 

[Wetkitty09]

I’m having issues keeping myself from going crazy with anxiety and depression due to the current situation in the U. S. and how it will affect myself and those I love.
Be safe out there.
Love you

 

[ccs29745]

I’m having issues keeping myself from going crazy with anxiety and depression due to the current situation in the U. S. and how it will affect myself and those I love.
Be safe out there.
Love you

It's nuts. My wife worried she'll have to leave due to birthright business. Amazing how one idiot can make a country worry.
If you ever want to talk or unload what's on you mind, my dm box is open.

 

[rainsol]

I would like to chat about a big problem that not too many people discuss. Sorry to be a downer. But there are too many people out there who are dying because they are depressed. I suffer from depression (not sure why) but I wouldn't think of killing myself. I've always been told that is a perminant solution to a temporary problem. I think it would do a good service to discuss what has worked for you to overcome your depression or what has helped someone you know.

Never heard that, but I have heard that STROKES are the silent killer and have seen it first hand

 

[Fuqueue]

For me, i turned to drugs or a little while...If you are suicidal, getting high is better than dying! Eventually finding my passions and purpose in life got me to where I have some drive to accomplish my purpose here on earth. However, if you go this route i highly suggest you hide it...ESPECIALLY if it's involving that hooker Tina, she has a bit of a reputation

 

[Robbie527]

I’m having issues keeping myself from going crazy with anxiety and depression due to the current situation in the U. S. and how it will affect myself and those I love.
Be safe out there.
Love you

How do you see it affecting you and those you love?

 

[Wetkitty09]

How do you see it affecting you and those you love?

I have friends and family who are LGBTQ+, or have brown skin, or depend on assistance to survive. I am dependent on social security, Medicare/Medicaid myself.
How else should I see what is happening but as a threat?

 

[Robbie527]

I doubt having brown skin alone is a problem rather than having brown skin and being an illegal immigrant. Lifestyle choices do cause legitimate offence to others and balance needs to be restored. We cannot go on where a bunch of folks parade their lifestyles and expect the rest of the word to accept and often fund them. Disability is a different issue and I have not seen any real threat here.

 

[Wetkitty09]

I doubt having brown skin alone is a problem rather than having brown skin and being an illegal immigrant. Lifestyle choices do cause legitimate offence to others and balance needs to be restored. We cannot go on where a bunch of folks parade their lifestyles and expect the rest of the word to accept and often fund them. Disability is a different issue and I have not seen any real threat

I disagree.

 

[Wetkitty09]

This is not a political thread.
If the current issues going on in our country is causing my depression to be worse then I at least know what’s causing it for a change.
My fears are valid regardless of how others may feel about my feelings.

Be safe out there
Love you.

 

[Ssbbw4u1974]

I doubt having brown skin alone is a problem rather than having brown skin and being an illegal immigrant. Lifestyle choices do cause legitimate offence to others and balance needs to be restored. We cannot go on where a bunch of folks parade their lifestyles and expect the rest of the word to accept and often fund them. Disability is a different issue and I have not seen any real threat here.

This also isn't the thread to judge others on what triggers them emotionally.. This is a safe space, free from judgement.

 

[Robbie527]

This also isn't the thread to judge others on what triggers them emotionally.. This is a safe space, free from judgement.

It also is not the place for attention seeking simply to show how caring you are.

 

[YourMasterorSub]

Depression is one of those things they I’ve always argued the case for and against, and having watched people suffer through this self diagnosis, I’m still not fully committed on the definition and whether is is wholly or partially self inflicted.

I used to be a person that would simply say “get fucking grip”, and still as an objective person, this does ring true for many situations. But during the first 5-8 months of my current relationship following a 5 year relationship, I was insanely unhappy on days when I was alone. I didn’t drink alcohol because of the loneliness, I think I deluded myself I was drinking for taste but in actual fact it was covering the real truth of stress from the trouble my ex was causing and unwillingness to admit I was lonely.

I know all of these self help articles blah blah say focus on things that make you happy, develop a new hobby etc, but it’s easier said than done. Even today, the gym is becoming hard - I can’t train with rage, I don’t enjoy cycling like I used to and always find an excuse to not play pool with friends.

If there is an old guy having an argument with a young dude, there would have been times where I’d say he is bang out of order, but now I’d reflect and think to myself “could someone of age really be so rude and lacking judgement”. I’m not suggesting that is an excuse but it suggests things below the surface can truly be the cause for hidden and uncharacteristic traits.

I’ve been a teacher for 6 years and without question, extreme behavioural problems stem from home, which can even be as simple as a one-parent household. Most kids, including myself, were in a one-parent household, but because I was also a kid, I couldn’t see it. In this instance, his parents simply didn’t spend any time with him. Once we found this as “almost fact” based on months of observation, we could apply this rationale to many students displaying the same attitude. I’d like to provide a scientific rationale for these problem students but I can’t, I can merely conjecture based on detailed observations.

 

[Wetkitty09]

This also isn't the thread to judge others on what triggers them emotionally.. This is a safe space, free from judgement.

Thanks for the support.

 

[Wetkitty09]

There are many reasons for depression. It’s up to the individual to explore, or not, themselves. But regardless of what causes your depression, you are depressed, and your feelings are valid. Others that say “suck it up” ,or whatever version of that statement used to invalidate your feelings, should be commended for being privileged to not have experienced depression but to otherwise keep their opinions to themselves.
Be safe out there.
Love you.

 

[Bassytian]

Agreed. It's FAR more complicated than "getting over it". While it has a lot to do with something in the brain's chemistry, a lot of it can and often is caused by trauma of some kind, as I'm sure mine is.

My doctor has encouraged me to think deeply about my childhood and recall as many details as possible. I have uncovered things I haven't thought about in years that have nearly broken me once again. But I'm thankful and stronger for it. I have been doing a lot of inner child healing practices that have been helping, and I'm also working with healing my inner teenager, he needs it more than my inner child does!

Lol, it may sound crazy, my brain is a very unusual place, but I like to think that I have formed an alliance with my inner child and teenager that we call "The United Front". Our goal is to kick depression's ass and reclaim inner peace!

 

[Wetkitty09]

Hello all. A little late checking in today.
I hope you’re having the best day you can.
Be safe out there. Love you.

 

[ccs29745]

Hello all. A little late checking in today.
I hope you’re having the best day you can.
Be safe out there. Love you.

Always a better day when you're checking on us.

 

[Wetkitty09]

Morning. It’s kind of a shit day for me so far.
I hope you’re having as good a day as you can.
Stay safe out there.
Love you.

 

[Mac7597]

Morning. It’s kind of a shit day for me so far.
I hope you’re having as good a day as you can.
Stay safe out there.
Love you.

Sorry to hear that. I hope it turns around for you.

 

[ccs29745]

Morning. It’s kind of a shit day for me so far.
I hope you’re having as good a day as you can.
Stay safe out there.
Love you.

Sorry it's a shit show today. You're a tough lady and can handle it. You got this.

 

[forgotmyantidepressants]

Some days, I can just *feel* my depression in my body. It's so heavy.

 

[Wetkitty09]

Morning.
I hope the day is the best it can be for you.
Be safe out there.
Love you.

 

[ccs29745]

Morning.
I hope the day is the best it can be for you.
Be safe out there.
Love you.

Have a good day and stay safe kiddo