Denial.... and how to deal with it.

[BabblingBrooke]

There is absolutely no way they would have signed her out against advice unless something like this happened.
She was on intraveinous pain medication, and now her pain control is much less effective.

And they are searching for a new doctor as a result.

No-one does that without a bloody good reason! Not at this stage of illness

Was there no nurse advocate at the hospital?

If she's in that level of pain, perhaps signing her out AMA was a mistake? At the stage you're describing, she would likely be much more comfortable in Hospice care. I would caution her husband and family from responding emotionally and making rash decisions. She needs people thinking reasonably right now, which isn't easy, but the business side of all of this never is, you know.

Either way, this is their situation, her decisions. In your shoes, Id focus on being a very good friend and companion while you're together.

 

[warrior queen]

Either way, this is their situation, her decisions. In your shoes, Id focus on being a very good friend and companion while you're together.

That's what I'm doing. Letting her dictate the day
So far, we're having a reasonable time, in between sleeping and oxygen therapy.
She's lucid except after taking the pain meds.

 

[allateup]

This deal is going to have one of those trademarked wanker queen endings, isn't it?

 

[chillywilly2]

A good hospice is a great place to be when its time...makes it easier on family and the person most affected.

I know a few people that went to them..my buddies mom spent 5 months in one till they kicked her ass out...that was 2 years ago

 

[warrior queen]

After a loooooong talk late last night, it is clear now that both sis and her hubby know what the score is - but they are choosing not to vocalise it (sortof like 'if we don't say it, it won't happen').

Equally clear is that she's fighting like crazy, but losing
At most, if luck holds, she'll see in the New Year....
(She's lost 1.5kg in the few days I have been here.)

I want to stay longer but I am not sure if I can.

 

[Aella_]

Must be horrible and heart-breaking for all of you guys.
I wish I could come up with something soothing, but

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

After a loooooong talk late last night, it is clear now that both sis and her hubby know what the score is - but they are choosing not to vocalise it (sortof like 'if we don't say it, it won't happen').

Equally clear is that she's fighting like crazy, but losing
At most, if luck holds, she'll see in the New Year....
(She's lost 1.5kg in the few days I have been here.)

I want to stay longer but I am not sure if I can.

Are you there for her or you? Narcissists like yourself don't make the best caregivers.

 

[Pairaclities]

After she dies are you going to tap the hubby?

And you were upset about a rape parody? Un-fucking- believable.
This woman is laying out her heart over a "sister" and you come up with that.
Apologize.

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

And you were upset about a rape parody? Un-fucking- believable.
This woman is laying out her heart over a "sister" and you come up with that.
Apologize.

I don't believe this story for a minute.

 

[Pairaclities]

I don't believe this story for a minute.

And maybe I don't either, however the point was reciprocal sensitivity - unless the Bronze part was parody or vendetta, in which case I have mis-read the dynamic here.

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

And maybe I don't either, however the point was reciprocal sensitivity - unless the Bronze part was parody or vendetta, in which case I have mis-read the dynamic here.

Anyone who comes the the GB seeking sympathy should have their head examined.

 

[bg23]

Anyone who comes the the GB seeking sympathy should have their head examined.

Weren't you acting all outraged about people mocking your bullshit cancer story like 5 minutes ago?

You know...because they didn't believe your load of bullshit?

But it's fine for you to be an asshole to WQ because you don't believe her story.

WQ had cancer too, you know. You should be nice to her. According to you, people should never be mean to people who had cancer.

 

[Pairaclities]

Anyone who comes the the GB seeking sympathy should have their head examined.

Perhaps true,
however you have avoided the point which leads me to believe your motive in one or both threads are completely more in line with revenge - petty at best.

 

[Aella_]

The last 2 posts: kinda true…
Although no excuse for any of the attackers (towards Ann or WQ)

 

[bg23]

The last 2 posts: kinda true…
Although no excuse for any of the attackers (towards Ann or WQ)

my personal opinion is that you can, and should be an asshole to whoever you like -- just be prepared to be called an asshole, and to receive the same.

using personal issues like some kind of shield and whining about people being mean to you -- only to turn around and do the exact same thing to someone else is just some fucking weak shit.

 

[Aella_]

my personal opinion is that you can, and should be an asshole to whoever you like -- just be prepared to be called an asshole, and to receive the same.

using personal issues like some kind of shield and whining about people being mean to you -- only to turn around and do the exact same thing to someone else is just some fucking weak shit.

1.I don't personally agree with your first sentence: I see the limit being comments about life-threatening illnesses or someone's job/family/ kids outside of Lit.
- although several Litsters pointed out some holes in my argument or expectations

2.But I totally agree with your second sentence.
the double standards…

 

[bg23]

1.I don't personally agree with your first sentence: I see the limit being comments about life-threatening illnesses or someone's job/family/ kids outside of Lit.
- although several Litsters pointed out some holes in my argument or expectations

2.But I totally agree with your second sentence.
the double standards…

yeah, and that's fair. everyone has their personal rules and their personal code. i can respect sticking to what you believe in.

generally i don't go near that shit either -- regardless of my personal feelings towards the poster i don't go out of my way to kick people when they're down.

but i don't judge people who call out the fuckery that they see - someone who gets off on being a fuckbag day in day out doesn't get a free pass just because they claim some bad shit happened to them one day.

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

Perhaps true,
however you have avoided the point which leads me to believe your motive in one or both threads are completely more in line with revenge - petty at best.

Avoided what point? You need to be a lot more concise. First of all, Bronzeage's rape joke parody thread didn't upset me, it pissed me off. Yeah. I don't particularly like him and generally avoid him when he's not attacking me or making an obvious ass of himself.

Warrior Queen is Warrior Queen. She wouldn't recognize reality if it crawled up her butt and had kittens. But she's interesting. I'm not here to raise unicorns so, if you're going to be a dick to me, well, I'll probably return the favor.

 

[lovetoread]

my personal opinion is that you can, and should be an asshole to whoever you like -- just be prepared to be called an asshole, and to receive the same.

using personal issues like some kind of shield and whining about people being mean to you -- only to turn around and do the exact same thing to someone else is just some fucking weak shit.

Yea that one you are talking to does this.

Has the nerve to get upset at people for doing what he does with almost every post.

 

[Aella_]

Yea that one you are talking to does this.

Has the nerve to get upset at people for doing what he does with almost every post.

bg23 was talking to me.
Now I think (and hope) that you were referring to Ann instead of referring to me. Again.
Because, in the slim chance that you had the latter in mind, I would have plenty of "playgrounders and Blurt" jokes ready to be fired, too.

 

[Debbie]

After a loooooong talk late last night, it is clear now that both sis and her hubby know what the score is - but they are choosing not to vocalise it (sortof like 'if we don't say it, it won't happen').

Equally clear is that she's fighting like crazy, but losing
At most, if luck holds, she'll see in the New Year....
(She's lost 1.5kg in the few days I have been here.)

I want to stay longer but I am not sure if I can.

It isnt much consolation when you want to be there with her. But if you do have to go perhaps you could leave her some recorded messages. Or organize some of her favourite music. Music and hearing a loved ones voice really soothes terminal patients. Little things like making sure she has some comfy head phones, a few of her favourite treats, music, you leaving her messages, talking to her even when she is zonked on the pain meds. Get hubby to take some photos of you and her and put them in little frames so she can see them.



Ask hubby if there is anything you can do for him. Make a few easy to heat meals and freeze them. Anything that you can do to make this horrible situation a little easier is priceless.

 

[La damnee elle la licorne]

 

[Pairaclities]

Avoided what point? You need to be a lot more concise. First of all, Bronzeage's rape joke parody thread didn't upset me, it pissed me off. Yeah. I don't particularly like him and generally avoid him when he's not attacking me or making an obvious ass of himself.

Warrior Queen is Warrior Queen. She wouldn't recognize reality if it crawled up her butt and had kittens. But she's interesting. I'm not here to raise unicorns so, if you're going to be a dick to me, well, I'll probably return the favor.

Not here to be a dick to anyone. Sorry, I lied. I am never bothered, nor miss an opportunity to be a dick to LJ Retarded.
I was pointing out the dichotomy between you taking offense to Bronze's parody on rape, and being a dick toward WQ over what may or may not be a loss of life that qualifies as family.

It is hypocritical. Do you see that?

 

[ms_ann_thrope]

Not here to be a dick to anyone. Sorry, I lied. I am never bothered, nor miss an opportunity to be a dick to LJ Retarded.
I was pointing out the dichotomy between you taking offense to Bronze's parody on rape, and being a dick toward WQ over what may or may not be a loss of life that qualifies as family.

It is hypocritical. Do you see that?

Everybody dies.

 

[Pairaclities]

Everybody dies.

Why yes, everyone does.

What does that have to do with the issue at hand, other than someone may have a family death soon.