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Defining Love

Lit is such an amazing community. Friendships form, sometimes even very strong friendships. People support one another here on a very regular basis. All this has led me to do some wondering.

I wonder if being in a loving community - and I see enough examples of loving acts between friends here that I would classify Lit as a loving community - makes it easier to love.

Here is my theory: familiarity does not breed contempt. Instead, it breeds comfort and confidence. The comfort comes with repeated exposure to new things, or perhaps to things that aren't entirely new but may still have been outside our comfort zone. The confidence comes to us in much the same way, as we consider, maybe even experiment with new ideas.

What do you think about this? My own experience is that spending time in Lit has changed me in ways that surprise me still. How about you?
 
midwestyankee said:
Lit is such an amazing community. Friendships form, sometimes even very strong friendships. People support one another here on a very regular basis. All this has led me to do some wondering.

I wonder if being in a loving community - and I see enough examples of loving acts between friends here that I would classify Lit as a loving community - makes it easier to love.

Here is my theory: familiarity does not breed contempt. Instead, it breeds comfort and confidence. The comfort comes with repeated exposure to new things, or perhaps to things that aren't entirely new but may still have been outside our comfort zone. The confidence comes to us in much the same way, as we consider, maybe even experiment with new ideas.

What do you think about this? My own experience is that spending time in Lit has changed me in ways that surprise me still. How about you?
Click to expand...

I'm looking for the spies you have tailing me!! Or have you been reading my journal??

I will consider this and get back to you..... ya big surprise I know!
 
Cathleen said:
I'm looking for the spies you have tailing me!! Or have you been reading my journal??

I will consider this and get back to you..... ya big surprise I know!
Click to expand...

Wuss. ;)
 
midwestyankee said:
Lit is such an amazing community. Friendships form, sometimes even very strong friendships. People support one another here on a very regular basis. All this has led me to do some wondering.

I wonder if being in a loving community - and I see enough examples of loving acts between friends here that I would classify Lit as a loving community - makes it easier to love.

Here is my theory: familiarity does not breed contempt. Instead, it breeds comfort and confidence. The comfort comes with repeated exposure to new things, or perhaps to things that aren't entirely new but may still have been outside our comfort zone. The confidence comes to us in much the same way, as we consider, maybe even experiment with new ideas.

What do you think about this? My own experience is that spending time in Lit has changed me in ways that surprise me still. How about you?
Click to expand...

I think that you are right to a certain extent. As long as we remember that while this can be a loving and supportive community, as in any community, it has it's fair share of liars, cheats, and fakes.

It has made me far more aware of the nature of people and not to trust quite so easily.
 
Missingmeds said:
I think that you are right to a certain extent. As long as we remember that while this can be a loving and supportive community, as in any community, it has it's fair share of liars, cheats, and fakes.

It has made me far more aware of the nature of people and not to trust quite so easily.
Click to expand...
Good point, as I think many of us have had the same experience.
 
midwestyankee said:
Lit is such an amazing community. Friendships form, sometimes even very strong friendships. People support one another here on a very regular basis. All this has led me to do some wondering.

I wonder if being in a loving community - and I see enough examples of loving acts between friends here that I would classify Lit as a loving community - makes it easier to love.

Here is my theory: familiarity does not breed contempt. Instead, it breeds comfort and confidence. The comfort comes with repeated exposure to new things, or perhaps to things that aren't entirely new but may still have been outside our comfort zone. The confidence comes to us in much the same way, as we consider, maybe even experiment with new ideas.

What do you think about this? My own experience is that spending time in Lit has changed me in ways that surprise me still. How about you?
Click to expand...

I'm back with my ponderings Yank, I know you were sitting on the edge of your computer chair waiting!

To say my Lit experience has changed me would be the understatement of the last two centuries. There are so many areas where this is evident to me.

Regarding the obvious, sex, I have learned so much I couldn't begin to tell you. My experience is limited as well was my knowledge. However, it was something I wanted to learn and this was the place I found for that education. Yes, it has brought a confidence in me that I've never had and I'm glad. Astounded actually.

The less obvious, the interaction and friendships I've been lucky to make, is a gift. I never expected anything here actually. I did come for the stories! Honest! And when I found the BB I was surprised. I'd never participated on a BB before and jumped in with both feet but holding my breath. The closeness I feel for some of the people here is so real that if one doesn't experience online life, I could never explain completely. I know I've made a few life long friends here and I don't take friendship lightly. For those people I am grateful.

The even less obvious would be my personal education and confidence. I've learned about myself here with discussions such as I find here in your thread. I've learned to listen better and understand more. I've learned that timing is present in my life and I am ready to receive knowledge. I am here at the right time in my life. I have gained an inner self confidence that had been lacking in me.

I have had the opportunity to challenge my beliefs and have made changes where I thought appropriate. I have learned about different kinds of love from different points of view. I've been able to relax and allow things to come to me in their own time.

I have had all these traits and qualities and brought them here to Lit with me; I realize that some of these things have been made more sharp or soft where needed. I agree this is a loving community, without a shadow of a doubt. I feel the love here as well as see it. This place ceased to be about sex to me a long while back.

I see the changes in me and embrace them all. I see myself in my off-line life putting to practice the changes I've made and it feels good and right. This is part of my "r/l" so I no longer want to separate the two, they co-mingle very well for me right now. I see changes with my capacity to love now that I didn't find a few short months ago. I am more open to love people instead of running from them. There are many wonderful people in this world to love and I have found some of them here. My experience here at Lit has allowed me to see people to love right in my own back yard too.

I consider this place to be fun for sure, I have a blast. But there is so much more and that is the appeal for me. I want to think about the parts of my life that most meaningful and discover more parts too. One step outside my comfort zone at a time. I've always been analytical and now its time to live a bit in the affective domain of my brain. Here I am able to do this.




edit: a spacing error.... oh gawd I'm getting like Yankee!!;)
 
Last edited:
Cathleen said:
I'm back with my ponderings Yank, I know you were sitting on the edge of your computer chair waiting!

To say my Lit experience has changed me would be the understatement of the last two centuries. There are so many areas where this is evident to me.

Regarding the obvious, sex, I have learned so much I couldn't begin to tell you. My experience is limited as well was my knowledge. However, it was something I wanted to learn and this was the place I found for that education. Yes, it has brought a confidence in me that I've never had and I'm glad. Astounded actually.

The less obvious, the interaction and friendships I've been lucky to make, is a gift. I never expected anything here actually. I

did come for the stories! Honest! And when I found the BB I was surprised. I'd never participated on a BB before and jumped in with both feet but holding my breath. The closeness I feel for some of the people here is so real that if one doesn't experience online life, I could never explain completely. I know I've made a few life long friends here and I don't take friendship lightly. For those people I am grateful.

The even less obvious would be my personal education and confidence. I've learned about myself here with discussions such as I find here in your thread. I've learned to listen better and understand more. I've learned that timing is present in my life and I am ready to receive knowledge. I am here at the right time in my life. I have gained an inner self confidence that had been lacking in me.

I have had the opportunity to challenge my beliefs and have made changes where I thought appropriate. I have learned about different kinds of love from different points of view. I've been able to relax and allow things to come to me in their own time.

I have had all these traits and qualities and brought them here to Lit with me; I realize that some of these things have been made more sharp or soft where needed. I agree this is a loving community, without a shadow of a doubt. I feel the love here as well as see it. This place ceased to be about sex to me a long while back.

I see the changes in me and embrace them all. I see myself in my off-line life putting to practice the changes I've made and it feels good and right. This is part of my "r/l" so I no longer want to separate the two, they co-mingle very well for me right now. I see changes with my capacity to love now that I didn't find a few short months ago. I am more open to love people instead of running from them. There are many wonderful people in this world to love and I have found some of them here. My experience here at Lit has allowed me to see people to love right in my own back yard too.

I consider this place to be fun for sure, I have a blast. But there is so much more and that is the appeal for me. I want to think about the parts of my life that most meaningful and discover more parts too. One step outside my comfort zone at a time. I've always been analytical and now its time to live a bit in the affective domain of my brain. Here I am able to do this.
Click to expand...
Cate, it was worth the wait. :rose:

I knew you'd take this one to heart and make it worth far more than it was originally.
 
midwestyankee said:
Cate, it was worth the wait. :rose:

I knew you'd take this one to heart and make it worth far more than it was originally.
Click to expand...
Oh Yankee!!!! Now that is just so nice of you to say!! Thanks.
:rose:
 
GiveawayGirl said:
Another favorite......or how about The Philidelphia Story ....that way DLL gets her Jimmy Stewart, I get my Cary Grant, and you can have your Kate
Click to expand...

What a happy ending
 
midwestyankee said:
Who wants to be a part-time smartass? The pay sucks and the benefits are lousy. ;)
Click to expand...
How would I know that.... I'm not a smartass, full or part time! But thanks for that info.... I won't apply for the job!! :D
 
Cathleen said:
How would I know that.... I'm not a smartass, full or part time! But thanks for that info.... I won't apply for the job!! :D
Click to expand...
Good idea. When I came to Lit, GG was the queen of the smartasses and I hear she is a tough employer. ;)
 
midwestyankee said:
Good idea. When I came to Lit, GG was the queen of the smartasses and I hear she is a tough employer. ;)
Click to expand...
Well it would appear to me that in her abscence you are king!! LOL
 
Cathleen said:
Well it would appear to me that in her abscence you are king!! LOL
Click to expand...
No thank you. Uneasy is the head that wears the crown.

Besides, she can hide hers under that hat when she needs to. ;)
 
midwestyankee said:
No thank you. Uneasy is the head that wears the crown.

Besides, she can hide hers under that hat when she needs to. ;)
Click to expand...
LOL Great reply!!:)
 
Didn't your mothers ever tell you two that it's not nice to talk about people when they are not around :D
 
GiveawayGirl said:
Didn't your mothers ever tell you two that it's not nice to talk about people when they are not around :D
Click to expand...
Conjured you right up!!! Hi GG.... great to see you!!;)
 
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