Defining Love

[midwestyankee]

Yank how can you take my initial response to your post from disagreement and end up agreeing with you? Man you're good.

Interesting perspective...kind of a glass half full approach. I like it. Actually I like it very much. Going to put that one to good use. Thanks hon.

If it looks like a compliment and feels like a compliment, then it must be a compliment.

Thanks.

 

[tn_greeneyez]

Some people love roller coasters (I'm one for certain) and others absolutely hate the

I am a roller coaster kind of girl........*smile*.

Thank you for the welcome Yannk.

 

[Peteslaw2]

what memo??? get out the red sharpie and circle it next time....
Yankee u need a good long kiss from a real Yankee fan...kissing you slow and deliberate...sucking your tongue tasting you,biting your bottom lip..losing all rationale wrapping my one leg around you i begin to grind my hips against you..your head falls back and i trail soft kisses up your neck before whispering in your ear,"what time do the yankees play tonight?"

Not to put to fine a point on defining love, but you can get the game times in the paper.

 

[midwestyankee]

Not to put to fine a point on defining love, but you can get the game times in the paper.

And the scores, too.

 

[Cathleen]

Well Yank.... sorry to say but your latest theory presented.... I agree....now what is the fun of that! Damn, you'll have to give me another so I can get all worked up again! LOL Its no fun agreeing!

 

[midwestyankee]

Well Yank.... sorry to say but your latest theory presented.... I agree....now what is the fun of that! Damn, you'll have to give me another so I can get all worked up again! LOL Its no fun agreeing!

So you're in agreement that Red Sox lovers do it best: in color, right?

 

[Cathleen]

So you're in agreement that Red Sox lovers do it best: in color, right?

but of course!

 

[midwestyankee]

So today's theory didn't provoke anywhere near enough controversy. And what fun is that going into a weekend? So here's something else to stir the pot. A few questions that came to an idle mind on a dreary afternoon:

What sense (touch, sight, smell, etc.) evokes love most powerfully for you?

Is your earliest memory of romantic love positive or negative? How do you think this has shaped your life in love since then?

Which has taken you the furthest from the norm: the high of gaining love or the low of losing it?

If you had the opportunity to change one thing you had done in a relationship with a beloved (and thus change the course of your own history), what would it be and why would you do it?

Right now, are you more in love than ever, about the same, or less so than ever?

On that same scale, where do you think you will be one year from today?

If you could make a composite person by combining the best features of beloveds from your past, would you do it? Why or why not?

 

[Shoshisexy]

So today's theory didn't provoke anywhere near enough controversy. And what fun is that going into a weekend? So here's something else to stir the pot. A few questions that came to an idle mind on a dreary afternoon:

What sense (touch, sight, smell, etc.) evokes love most powerfully for you?

Is your earliest memory of romantic love positive or negative? How do you think this has shaped your life in love since then?

Which has taken you the furthest from the norm: the high of gaining love or the low of losing it?

If you had the opportunity to change one thing you had done in a relationship with a beloved (and thus change the course of your own history), what would it be and why would you do it?

Right now, are you more in love than ever, about the same, or less so than ever?

On that same scale, where do you think you will be one year from today?

If you could make a composite person by combining the best features of beloveds from your past, would you do it? Why or why not?

Opportunity to change one thing...Yes. I would never have had a sexual relationship with my best friend.

More in love than ever and the same next year.

Composite person: Not just no, but Hell, no! I love the people in my life for who and what they are, not for specific attributes.

 

[frustratedpoodle]

So today's theory didn't provoke anywhere near enough controversy. And what fun is that going into a weekend? So here's something else to stir the pot. A few questions that came to an idle mind on a dreary afternoon:

What sense (touch, sight, smell, etc.) evokes love most powerfully for you?

Touch for sure, as it means physical closeness.

Is your earliest memory of romantic love positive or negative? How do you think this has shaped your life in love since then?

Definitely positive. My first bf and I are great friends to this day, and together, we learned that respect and honesty are key to keeping a relationship alive, no matter how it evolves.

Which has taken you the furthest from the norm: the high of gaining love or the low of losing it?

The low of losing it, or thinking I had, put me in one of the worst tailspins in the history of me.

If you had the opportunity to change one thing you had done in a relationship with a beloved (and thus change the course of your own history), what would it be and why would you do it?

I wouldn't change a thing. We are who we are in part because of those that touched us and what we go through. I like who I am.

Right now, are you more in love than ever, about the same, or less so than ever?

More than ever.

On that same scale, where do you think you will be one year from today?

Hopefully saying the same thing.

If you could make a composite person by combining the best features of beloveds from your past, would you do it? Why or why not?

I'm perfectly happy with what I have now, so no.

 

[midwestyankee]

Opportunity to change one thing...Yes. I would never have had a sexual relationship with my best friend.

More in love than ever and the same next year.

Composite person: Not just no, but Hell, no! I love the people in my life for who and what they are, not for specific attributes.

That sounds like quite a significant reversal you would get by changing that act.

But no interest in creating the perfect love, eh? Not even tempted just a little?

 

[midwestyankee]

Poodle, thanks for replying. You sound like a very happy person.

 

[frustratedpoodle]

Poodle, thanks for replying. You sound like a very happy person.

It's my pleasure. I love these "slam book" type threads. All the responses are so fun to read.

And yes, I am, and damn I ever embracing that because it's taken a long time to get there.

 

[midwestyankee]

It's my pleasure. I love these "slam book" type threads. All the responses are so fun to read.

And yes, I am, and damn I ever embracing that because it's taken a long time to get there.

Do you have any secrets to share from your success?

 

[frustratedpoodle]

Do you have any secrets to share from your success?

I'd like to think I am a wise sage on the matter, but really I sort of made my mistakes and stumbled into an epiphany on a few things that had plagued my existence up until that point.

If I could single out any lessons learned that made a difference, they would be:

1. Problems exist no matter what. Deal with them or ignore them, but don't think about them when you lay your head on that pillow.
2. Don't sweat the small stuff.
3. Be honest if not blunt about your feelings on anything. Saves a lot of bullshit when you aren't beating around the bush.
4. Games are for kids and drunks. Not relationships.
5. Be true to you, because you have to live with your choices, no one else does.

Otherwise, I just wake up each morning thinking it's going to be the best day ever until something proves me wrong.

I don't know that any of that is any big secret, but it improved my outlook. A few years ago I was chopping up a garden hose with a machete and considering the joy of carbon monoxide poisoning in a Mazda. No meds. No counseling. Just grew up a little.

The Poodle

 

[midwestyankee]

I'd like to think I am a wise sage on the matter, but really I sort of made my mistakes and stumbled into an epiphany on a few things that had plagued my existence up until that point.

If I could single out any lessons learned that made a difference, they would be:

1. Problems exist no matter what. Deal with them or ignore them, but don't think about them when you lay your head on that pillow.
2. Don't sweat the small stuff.
3. Be honest if not blunt about your feelings on anything. Saves a lot of bullshit when you aren't beating around the bush.
4. Games are for kids and drunks. Not relationships.
5. Be true to you, because you have to live with your choices, no one else does.

Otherwise, I just wake up each morning thinking it's going to be the best day ever until something proves me wrong.

I don't know that any of that is any big secret, but it improved my outlook. A few years ago I was chopping up a garden hose with a machete and considering the joy of carbon monoxide poisoning in a Mazda. No meds. No counseling. Just grew up a little.

The Poodle

I'd say you grew more than a little.

 

[frustratedpoodle]

I'd say you grew more than a little.

Aw, shucks. *blush* I think we never cease to grow and learn. We just all do it differently.

 

[midwestyankee]

Aw, shucks. *blush* I think we never cease to grow and learn. We just all do it differently.

Unfortunately, some of us learn far too slowly.

 

[frustratedpoodle]

Unfortunately, some of us learn far too slowly.

But as long as we aren't backsliding, then we're okay. And everyone has different lessons to learn. Everyone's issues are different. No one is better or smarter, or has some certain something that makes it easier or harder. It's just taking life by the horns and making it your bitch.

The Poodle

 

[shyly curious]

It's theory time again, folks. So I won't be offended if you just skip over this and wait for the next amusing post from someone else.

Love hurts, they say. I disagree.

<snip>...

Love is the journey. Do not blame the journey for the ills that befall you along the way. Do not blame the journey for the weather you encounter as you travel, nor for the poor condition of the road as you pass through unkempt places. It is not the fault of the journey when travelers quarrel as they go.

Love hurts? No, it does not. But the loss of love or the fear of that loss? That, my friends, is the original hurt.

i agree, life is a journey, and love is part of that journey. To experience my life i have to be open and available to what comes along, the exciting and the mundane, the thrilling and the scary.

too bad i was absent the day they handed out the maps and candles, cause i sure have gotten pretty lost a few times and boy can it get weird with no map and so dark without the candles.

 

[midwestyankee]

i agree, life is a journey, and love is part of that journey. To experience my life i have to be open and available to what comes along, the exciting and the mundane, the thrilling and the scary.

too bad i was absent the day they handed out the maps and candles, cause i sure have gotten pretty lost a few times and boy can it get weird with no map and so dark without the candles.

Map?

Candles?

 

[shyly curious]

So today's theory didn't provoke anywhere near enough controversy. And what fun is that going into a weekend? So here's something else to stir the pot. A few questions that came to an idle mind on a dreary afternoon:

What sense (touch, sight, smell, etc.) evokes love most powerfully for you?

Is your earliest memory of romantic love positive or negative? How do you think this has shaped your life in love since then?

Which has taken you the furthest from the norm: the high of gaining love or the low of losing it?

If you had the opportunity to change one thing you had done in a relationship with a beloved (and thus change the course of your own history), what would it be and why would you do it?

Right now, are you more in love than ever, about the same, or less so than ever?

On that same scale, where do you think you will be one year from today?

If you could make a composite person by combining the best features of beloveds from your past, would you do it? Why or why not?

#1 for me is sight, i am visually based. #2 would be touch.

When i was young, probably about 14, a like aged girl visited my neighbors from Calif. I still remember her name these 36 years later. She swept me off my feet, she was happy, fun, smart, and just plain nice. To this day my desires for personality are the same. Whether that is because of her i do not know.

I have been taken to incredible highs of emotional bliss, and been taken to incredible lows as well. Fortunately not by the same people. I think i have been given far more highs then lows.

I am who i am because of my experiences, to go back and change something would alter who i am, so i am not interested in altering some past experience. They were all helpful in my growth.

i am less in love then i have been in the past.

next year, sheesh, i was just hoping to make thru the weekend. Seriously, i hope i am more in love a year from now then i am today.

i would not want to make a composite of the women who have graced my life. Each was a vital and vibrant unique individual who will always be remembered as herself.

I can't disect them and treat them as Legos, they were the sum of all their facets, indivisable from their parts.

 

[shyly curious]

Map?

Candles?

the map to guide me on the journey of love and life ... the candles to light the way ...


sorry, guess i was too obscure again ...

 

[midwestyankee]

the map to guide me on the journey of love and life ... the candles to light the way ...


sorry, guess i was too obscure again ...

No, I was too obscure. I was remarking that I too had not been in the proper line when these life aids were dispensed.

 

[shyly curious]

No, I was too obscure. I was remarking that I too had not been in the proper line when these life aids were dispensed.

which of course raises the question, ... how did we both get this far without the map and candles????????