deep sadness

[Starfish]

Jade darling, I am worried about you because you said that you think the baby didn't want you. I hope you were just saying that and don't really think that. You are a wonderful person. Sometimes it is all a matter of cell division. It has nothing to do with your baby not wanting you.

It is so sad, but so many women loose their babies in the first trimester because there are so many factors that effect meitosis and so much that can go wrong. It is our bodies way of preventing a baby from being born with genetic problems. It is natural, but painfull all the same.

I hope you have the courage to try again, once you have emotionally recovered. It seems that you reallly want a baby, and that you would be a wonderful mommy.

(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((Jade)))))))))))))))))))))))))

 

[mistyc]

My prayers are with you Jade.

I too have been through it. Not once, nor twice, but three times. The pain will ease, this I can promise. But the thought or the love will never leave.

The Creator had his reasons, and it is up to us to trust them and not to question.

I know this is hard to accept at the moment.

It is definitely NOT because your baby did not want you, you must never think that. All the love in the world will is not a guarantee to keep a child safe, no matter how much it is loved.

What helped me through, was not the love of family, but my love for my lost babies, knowing that they are now in the gentle hands of the Creator. And will always be able to look down on us as we carry them in our hearts for all time.

I know these are just words, but they are words from one grieving mother who has been through the loss. Even though it has been 21 years since my first one left me.

I will forever love my lost little ones.

 

[Chuckus]

Hugs to you Jade.

 

[Bindii]

Jade I am so sorry to hear of your loss. You will find that many of us understand what you are going through, its heartwrenching for the soul. Its not a case of your baby not wanting you, please don't feel this way. In life there are some things that cannot be explained; sadly this is one of them.

I have shared your pain, it will ease; you will never forget but it will ease.

 

[KillerMuffin]

She wanted you Jade, very much. She wanted you enough to try to be born even though she knew how much it would hurt you. My heart goes out to you.

 

[sigh]

i saw the name of the thread and who posted it, and i just knew what had happened...i didn't want to come inside, but i had to

i just had to come tell you how sorry i am

 

[Silverlily]

I too, didn't want to open this thread, I knew what it meant. Regardless at what point a pregnancy ends, it hurts. I know, I've lost two. There is a hollowness, a void.

Grieve Jade, don't bottle it up. If you need someone, you can always come here. We will catch you.

 

[Cheyenne]

Oh, Jade. I'm sorry you lost your baby, but I'm glad you had the chance to first decide you really wanted her. She gave you the gift of knowing you can love another child after your son, and maybe also the idea that there really IS another baby for you in your future now that your heart is open to hope. I know you have to grieve, first. But I believe that hope is still there.

 

[erosman]

hugs Jade, your sorrow is shared

Can a thing conceived or created not burn with passion to know its Creator? I think not...only in the callousness of adult hardness...never in the innocence of a child's tenderness.

This little one possessed the very fabric of your soul...you were its one desire.

Grieve for your loss, not for what you believe were its choices. A child's love extends beyong this life.

 

[Black_Bird]

Jade...

Peace be with you, dear. Time will heal.

 

[Guest]

 

[SweetBrat73]

I can't say I know what you're feeling because I don't. I've never miscarried but I feel deeply for you. I'm so sorry for your loss Jade. *HUGS*


Brat

 

[Jade]

All of your replies helped so much

I was shocked to see how many people responded to this thread.


I'm extremely sad and desolate right now

But the sympathy has helped

I know you are all out there somewhere

that you are real people

people that care


Thanks for being just that

Sorry not much more to say right now

thoughts unclear

and still very sad

take care everyone

~J~

 

[LukkyKnight]

No apology is needed, Jade.

 

[Ree]

Jade,
I am so sorry for your loss. I know the struggle you are going through and how difficult this time is for you. You are doing a brave and wonderful thing by giving your daughter a name and being able to remember her with love and joy as the sadness will fade with time. I can't say that it will ever go away but it will become easier to remember and to be grateful that you will see her again someday. My daughter, Kendall Nicole, would have be born in October of 1994 and we lost her not long after finding out we were pregnant. It was a difficult loss and I still have a ring my husband bought to signify her birth month. There are support groups for women who have lost children and your ob/gyn might know of one locally. There are also online support groups that will help you through this time and we are all here for you also. You can PM anytime you feel the need to talk. Take care of yourself and our prayers are with you.

 

[Jacqline]

Deep Sadness

Jade........I am so very sorry for your loss. You have a new angel watching over you..........

 

[SilverVeil]

I am sorry for your loss Jade. I can only hope you have comfort and support in this time of sorrow.

 

[batter]

Jade

i am so sorry to hear of the loss.
i can relate as my first wife and i had a miscarrage when we were first married.
it was heartbreaking, but we also learned to try again later and not to be afraid. we were blessed with our first born the following year and it was well worth the wait.
big hugs.

 

[Shy Tall Guy]

Jade,

All I can say is that I grieve for you and your loss.

I am sure your baby loved you as only a child can love a mother.

 

[Guest]

I guess my baby didn't want me

she left me this morning

I named her Noel Celeste b/c she was conceived christmas eve and is now an angel

I am back from the hospital and am very sad

I will never regret not aborting

The fetus was conceived 3 weeks ago, how did you know it was a girl? How do you know for sure you were pregnant and not just late? Why did you have to go to the hospital? It isn't like you have to get a DNC for that early of a miscarriage.

~sniff sniff~ I smell a line of bullshit.

and no, i'm not a troll. I'm a guttless regular.

 

[Oliver Clozoff]

Jade,

I'm so sorry for your loss. I know it's all the worse given what you went through with your first pregnacy. Listen to what the other lit folks are saying. 15-20% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage and most of them are never medically explained. I know that doesn't make it much easier, but worrying about cosmic questions like "why?" might make this even harder than it already is.

I wish you the best.

Gutless regular,

you're ignorant and an asshole. I know Jade and she wouldn't lie about this. You're right that she couldn't have known the sex this early, but plenty of women have their suspicions about the sex of their child without ultrasound evidence. Does that mean the whole thing is "bullshit"?

Second, over-the-counter pregnacy tests are crude but can still detect levels of Beta HCG present in urine by 2 weeks after conception (that's before a woman realizes she's missed a period). Blood tests can detect pregnancy even sooner.

And when did she say she'd had a D&C? (it's D and C, by the way, for "dilation and curetage", not "DNC". What does the Democratic National Committee have to do with this?). She said she'd gone to the hospital. Women frequently come to the ER with vaginal bleeding during early pregnacy fearing a miscarriage. I treated one just the other night.

Please crawl back under your rock until such time as you're willing to voice your ignorant accusations from behind your regular handle.

 

[KillerMuffin]

Ollie, you are lavishly adored.

 

[SweetBrat73]

Got the same thing on here twice...so I took one off.

Brat

 

[Cheyenne]

Oliver- has anyone thanked you lately for being the unofficial Lit Doc? You carry more clout here than I think you know.

Thanks.

 

[SweetBrat73]

Originally posted by Oliver Clozoff [/i

Gutless regular,

you're ignorant and an asshole. I know Jade and she wouldn't lie about this. You're right that she couldn't have known the sex this early, but plenty of women have their suspicions about the sex of their child without ultrasound evidence. Does that mean the whole thing is "bullshit"?

Second, over-the-counter pregnacy tests are crude but can still detect levels of Beta HCG present in urine by 2 weeks after conception (that's before a woman realizes she's missed a period). Blood tests can detect pregnancy even sooner.

And when did she say she'd had a D&C? (it's D and C, by the way, for "dilation and curetage", not "DNC". What does the Democratic National Committee have to do with this?). She said she'd gone to the hospital. Women frequently come to the ER with vaginal bleeding during early pregnacy fearing a miscarriage. I treated one just the other night.

Please crawl back under your rock until such time as you're willing to voice your ignorant accusations from behind your regular handle. [/B]

I second that!!! And from what I recall...she only told us about it 3 weeks ago...you don't know how far along she was...

Hope you don't let that jerk bother you Jade.

Brat