Dearest Laurel...

[islandman]

...why won't you fix chat?

For one, have you any idea of the personal fortunes spent on upgrading RAM, the retaining of tech support to install and debug their java client, and the purchasing of high-speed internet access and penis/vagina-shaped mice in the hopes of getting past the "Initializing..." screen to the wonderful land of cybersex that is Lit. chat?

In fact, lots of people have left their computers running for years after seeing said screen in the hopes that they will one day be granted access. Imagine for a moment the collective computing power left to idle on your watch! Is it any wonder the that SkyNet has not yet become self-aware?

For another, from recent threads - this and that - there appears to be a large population of under-sexed Litsters. By fixing chat, these unfortunate souls could interact and work their way to being appropriately-sexed. Just imagine the outpouring of gratitude you'd receive from all of those making a love connection. Please help bring our world a little closer together!

Yours in love and lust,


Islandman

 

[Sean]

Dude, if you'd just let Kyle on your twitter you wouldn't have to go to these lengths.

 

[islandman]

Laurel is kyle?

 

[Saint Peter]

@kissass

 

[islandman]

Please focus your responses to the topic at hand, namely, how to get under-sexed Litsters appropriately-sexed via Lit. chat.

 

[Joeybagadonuts]

i get like no sex at all since chat is down!

 

[KyleW]

Laurel:

I volunteer to be the IT support for Lit.

Here are a list of my qualifications:

I used gabbly
I fix my wife's computer every time she fucks it up
I have spent years working at various offices that have old stupid people. I end up showing them how to operate their computer, because they're stupid.
I own ferrets, 3 of them.
I wear capes when I fight crime
I'm Kyle
Doves cry
I have pictures of you that I will leak to the press if you don't comply
I once jumped over a small dog while jogging and fell on my ass
That fell caused a small cut on my ass
I got an infection in said cut
I ended up in the hospital for a week and nearly died, (true story actually)
TMI
I hate grape soda
I shun republicans
I was amazing at NHL93 and 94 on the Sega Genesis
Dr who is awesome
daleks are dumb
Prometheus was a good movie
afk

 

[islandman]

i get like no sex at all since chat is down!

Laurel,

Please help Joey get his cybersexy on.

 

[SalviaDivinorum]

Dear Laurel,
Help find me some peasant cock.
Thank you.

 

[Byron In Exile]

What in the Seven Hells are you people on about?

 

[islandman]

What in the Seven Hells are you people on about?

I'm sorry, but I have neither the time nor the inclination to translate this thread into Latin.

 

[Byron In Exile]

I'm sorry, but I have neither the time nor the inclination to translate this thread into Latin.

Dost thou think that because thou art virtuous... that there shall be no more cakes and ale?

 

[islandman]

Dost thou think that because thou art virtuous... that there shall be no more cakes and ale?

Yes.

And gingers have always been pretty hot to me.

 

[Byron In Exile]

Yes.

And gingers have always been pretty hot to me.

Do you mean the one from Gilligan's Island?

 

[islandman]

Do you mean the one from Gilligan's Island?

Please limit your contributions to the topic introduced in the op.

Thank you.

 

[QueenLevitra]

I've never even attempted to enter the Lit chat room(s?).

Now back to following @kissass on the twat feed.

 

[eric60red]

...why won't you fix chat?

For one, have you any idea of the personal fortunes spent on upgrading RAM, the retaining of tech support to install and debug their java client, and the purchasing of high-speed internet access and penis/vagina-shaped mice in the hopes of getting past the "Initializing..." screen to the wonderful land of cybersex that is Lit. chat?

In fact, lots of people have left their computers running for years after seeing said screen in the hopes that they will one day be granted access. Imagine for a moment the collective computing power left to idle on your watch! Is it any wonder the that SkyNet has not yet become self-aware?

For another, from recent threads - this and that - there appears to be a large population of under-sexed Litsters. By fixing chat, these unfortunate souls could interact and work their way to being appropriately-sexed. Just imagine the outpouring of gratitude you'd receive from all of those making a love connection. Please help bring our world a little closer together!

Yours in love and lust,


Islandman

HERE HERE !!,, I thought it was my underpowerd steam powerd computer, that couldnt handle the chat rooms. Its good to know that I am not alone, Im fed up of looking at the " Initializing..." screen, and waitting, and waiting, and waitting, I can some time gain acess on a Monday or Tuesday, but never Fridays and weekends. I am missing my cyber sex, what can I do go to another web site perhaps?

 

[islandman]

Laurel,

This problem is in desperate need of your ministrations.

 

[XdOu™]

i'm down with whatever lol

 

[Saint Peter]

Fix scat?

 

[MidgetClown]

...why won't you fix chat?

For one, have you any idea of the personal fortunes spent on upgrading RAM, the retaining of tech support to install and debug their java client, and the purchasing of high-speed internet access and penis/vagina-shaped mice in the hopes of getting past the "Initializing..." screen to the wonderful land of cybersex that is Lit. chat?

In fact, lots of people have left their computers running for years after seeing said screen in the hopes that they will one day be granted access. Imagine for a moment the collective computing power left to idle on your watch! Is it any wonder the that SkyNet has not yet become self-aware?

For another, from recent threads - this and that - there appears to be a large population of under-sexed Litsters. By fixing chat, these unfortunate souls could interact and work their way to being appropriately-sexed. Just imagine the outpouring of gratitude you'd receive from all of those making a love connection. Please help bring our world a little closer together!

Yours in love and lust,


Islandman

 

[XdOu™]

hahah

 

[lovetoread]

Laurel,

This problem is in desperate need of your ministrations.

Thank you ever so much, iman, for looking out for those of us unsexed and in need.

There are not many people around here who would take time out of their day to make sure that others get the help that may be needed.

Let me take this time to ask Laurel to give you back your helpfulest lit member badge.

Yours in spirit,

LTR

 

[islandman]

Thank you ever so much, iman, for looking out for those of us unsexed and in need.

There are not many people around here who would take time out of their day to make sure that others get the help that may be needed.

Let me take this time to ask Laurel to give you back your helpfulest lit member badge.

Yours in spirit,

LTR

Remember when I said the other day that I should start a Personals thread in which under-sexed GeeBee'rs should post their skype names so as to facilitate some much-needed cybersexing?

I realized that chat was a much better vehicle for this as it allows groups of people to chat (aka the bar scene) before pairing off and heading to the dark, seedy bathrooms in the back (aka, Skype).

Currently under someone's skirt,

Islandman

 

[lovetoread]

Dear iman,

Could you please make the next helpful thread be about how to use Skype correctly and maybe give a demonstration?

Thank you for your time, I realize being under the skirt is hard work.

LTR