Dear X:

Dear you,

For the year that we owned this house together, the year when you lived up north all week and just came home on the weekend, I did my best survive financially. Every month that you didn't give me the agreed-upon amount of money for your share of the bills, I steamed. And every month that you marveled at my "financial finesse" because I was somehow robbing Peter just enough to pay Paul so that we had electricity and phones, I wanted to verbally rip you apart. I don't even know how many times I told you I needed to sell the house. I was honest with you, telling you that I was drowning in a sea of debt, that my anxiety was causing the weight loss and the hair loss and the irritability. You begged me to keep the house. Each and every time, you said that you would start helping out. Then you'd bring 20 dollars worth of groceries and some used piece of furniture you'd picked up on craigslist. You got angry when I was not appropriately enthusiastic over your financial contribution. You made three times what I made last year, and I supported myself and my three kids on my income. You fell further into your own debt and didn't contribute one real dime to this household.

Well, I managed to keep the balls in the air for a while. In the process I destroyed my health and fell behind in school. I still work two jobs while raising a family and carrying as many as 17 credits in the honors program. And now that I've finally kicked you out of our life, I am trying to pay catch up. This week, I wrote checks to cover the phone bills. Because I was paying a minimum amount, I had over three hundred dollars in back bills. Because you agreed to pay for the neutering of the kitten, but didn't, I paid the vet the one hundred and fifty that you never did. The water bill? The one you said you were taking care of the whole time - it hadn't been paid in the entire year we lived here. That means you never paid it - not once. I paid three hundred to the water company this weekend.

My student loan money is just about gone for this semester. And today, the electric bill came. I haven't one spare cent to pay them all winter, and because they couldn't shut me off till April 15, that was the bill that didn't get paid. I opened it today. It was over two thousand dollars. I don't have the money. I just don't. And April 15 is coming fast. My brakes are bad on the car. I have an appt to get them fixed tomorrow. But I have to decide between brakes and a decent first payment for the electric to avoid shut-off.

It is entirely possible that we will not have power here in two weeks. Because you spent your money foolishly, and refused to fulfill your obligations. You cried when we broke up, saying you couldn't believe I was ending our relationship over money. But what I ended our relationship over was your lack of respect. I told you love was an action verb, and you made a list of things you did for me. You had the audacity to include on that list coming home every weekend to "visit" me. But in doing that, you were merely doing as you promised when you moved up north to work. And, as usual, you didn't even really do it the way you said you would (you skipped weekends, came late, left early and complained each time about the drive). But the amount of money I paid out this week, plus the amount I owe the electric company is only half of what you agreed to give me. If you had done what you offered to do, I wouldn't be where I am now. Love Is An Action Verb.

You didn't love me the way I loved you. I would have never done this to you. As a matter of fact, I repeatedly bailed you out of your small financial disasters because you were my partner and I loved you. I paid for payday loans, tanks of gas, forgotten gifts for your friends and family, overdraft fees, and car insurance. Never once did I let you fall.

Remember that next time you decide to ruminate on how unfair our break-up was.

Me.

I cannot express how much I want to give you a hug right now. :( :rose:
 
Dear you,

For the year that we owned this house together, the year when you lived up north all week and just came home on the weekend, I did my best survive financially. Every month that you didn't give me the agreed-upon amount of money for your share of the bills, I steamed. And every month that you marveled at my "financial finesse" because I was somehow robbing Peter just enough to pay Paul so that we had electricity and phones, I wanted to verbally rip you apart. I don't even know how many times I told you I needed to sell the house. I was honest with you, telling you that I was drowning in a sea of debt, that my anxiety was causing the weight loss and the hair loss and the irritability. You begged me to keep the house. Each and every time, you said that you would start helping out. Then you'd bring 20 dollars worth of groceries and some used piece of furniture you'd picked up on craigslist. You got angry when I was not appropriately enthusiastic over your financial contribution. You made three times what I made last year, and I supported myself and my three kids on my income. You fell further into your own debt and didn't contribute one real dime to this household.

Well, I managed to keep the balls in the air for a while. In the process I destroyed my health and fell behind in school. I still work two jobs while raising a family and carrying as many as 17 credits in the honors program. And now that I've finally kicked you out of our life, I am trying to pay catch up. This week, I wrote checks to cover the phone bills. Because I was paying a minimum amount, I had over three hundred dollars in back bills. Because you agreed to pay for the neutering of the kitten, but didn't, I paid the vet the one hundred and fifty that you never did. The water bill? The one you said you were taking care of the whole time - it hadn't been paid in the entire year we lived here. That means you never paid it - not once. I paid three hundred to the water company this weekend.

My student loan money is just about gone for this semester. And today, the electric bill came. I haven't one spare cent to pay them all winter, and because they couldn't shut me off till April 15, that was the bill that didn't get paid. I opened it today. It was over two thousand dollars. I don't have the money. I just don't. And April 15 is coming fast. My brakes are bad on the car. I have an appt to get them fixed tomorrow. But I have to decide between brakes and a decent first payment for the electric to avoid shut-off.

It is entirely possible that we will not have power here in two weeks. Because you spent your money foolishly, and refused to fulfill your obligations. You cried when we broke up, saying you couldn't believe I was ending our relationship over money. But what I ended our relationship over was your lack of respect. I told you love was an action verb, and you made a list of things you did for me. You had the audacity to include on that list coming home every weekend to "visit" me. But in doing that, you were merely doing as you promised when you moved up north to work. And, as usual, you didn't even really do it the way you said you would (you skipped weekends, came late, left early and complained each time about the drive). But the amount of money I paid out this week, plus the amount I owe the electric company is only half of what you agreed to give me. If you had done what you offered to do, I wouldn't be where I am now. Love Is An Action Verb.

You didn't love me the way I loved you. I would have never done this to you. As a matter of fact, I repeatedly bailed you out of your small financial disasters because you were my partner and I loved you. I paid for payday loans, tanks of gas, forgotten gifts for your friends and family, overdraft fees, and car insurance. Never once did I let you fall.

Remember that next time you decide to ruminate on how unfair our break-up was.

Me.
*hugs* :rose::kiss:
 
Dear ................

I have no idea how the conversation turned the way it did tonight. One minute we were talking 'what ifs' and the next thing I knew it was about me asking for money. In all this time I have never done that. If you know anything about me, you should realize I am the one that repeatedly said you were out of my league because of your wealth.

When you speak of a gift, it's major. Today a new Porsche was mentioned. To me that is inconceivable. I know you come from a different world than I do. Yet caring for someone, in my opinion, is not based on how much they can spend on me.

You left with that as our last conversation tonight. It hurts that you might have even a tiny bit of doubt in what I said. I guess it hurts that I had to defend myself. Yes, we are in a unique situation. We both know that. If money was all I wanted you would have discovered that a long time ago.

I know you won't read this. It's more to get it out of my head than anything. A venting of sorts. Maybe tomorrow will be better for both of us.


Lynn
 
Dear X,

Here's a suggestion. Print this on index cards & give one to every person you talk to.

"Anything you say to me is subject to being repeated whenever I am drunk or bored and have an audience to entertain. My love for the sound of my own voice is much stronger than any sense of respect I feel for you."

J
 
Dear you,

For the year that we owned this house together, the year when you lived up north all week and just came home on the weekend, I did my best survive financially. Every month that you didn't give me the agreed-upon amount of money for your share of the bills, I steamed. And every month that you marveled at my "financial finesse" because I was somehow robbing Peter just enough to pay Paul so that we had electricity and phones, I wanted to verbally rip you apart. I don't even know how many times I told you I needed to sell the house. I was honest with you, telling you that I was drowning in a sea of debt, that my anxiety was causing the weight loss and the hair loss and the irritability. You begged me to keep the house. Each and every time, you said that you would start helping out. Then you'd bring 20 dollars worth of groceries and some used piece of furniture you'd picked up on craigslist. You got angry when I was not appropriately enthusiastic over your financial contribution. You made three times what I made last year, and I supported myself and my three kids on my income. You fell further into your own debt and didn't contribute one real dime to this household.

Well, I managed to keep the balls in the air for a while. In the process I destroyed my health and fell behind in school. I still work two jobs while raising a family and carrying as many as 17 credits in the honors program. And now that I've finally kicked you out of our life, I am trying to pay catch up. This week, I wrote checks to cover the phone bills. Because I was paying a minimum amount, I had over three hundred dollars in back bills. Because you agreed to pay for the neutering of the kitten, but didn't, I paid the vet the one hundred and fifty that you never did. The water bill? The one you said you were taking care of the whole time - it hadn't been paid in the entire year we lived here. That means you never paid it - not once. I paid three hundred to the water company this weekend.

My student loan money is just about gone for this semester. And today, the electric bill came. I haven't one spare cent to pay them all winter, and because they couldn't shut me off till April 15, that was the bill that didn't get paid. I opened it today. It was over two thousand dollars. I don't have the money. I just don't. And April 15 is coming fast. My brakes are bad on the car. I have an appt to get them fixed tomorrow. But I have to decide between brakes and a decent first payment for the electric to avoid shut-off.

It is entirely possible that we will not have power here in two weeks. Because you spent your money foolishly, and refused to fulfill your obligations. You cried when we broke up, saying you couldn't believe I was ending our relationship over money. But what I ended our relationship over was your lack of respect. I told you love was an action verb, and you made a list of things you did for me. You had the audacity to include on that list coming home every weekend to "visit" me. But in doing that, you were merely doing as you promised when you moved up north to work. And, as usual, you didn't even really do it the way you said you would (you skipped weekends, came late, left early and complained each time about the drive). But the amount of money I paid out this week, plus the amount I owe the electric company is only half of what you agreed to give me. If you had done what you offered to do, I wouldn't be where I am now. Love Is An Action Verb.

You didn't love me the way I loved you. I would have never done this to you. As a matter of fact, I repeatedly bailed you out of your small financial disasters because you were my partner and I loved you. I paid for payday loans, tanks of gas, forgotten gifts for your friends and family, overdraft fees, and car insurance. Never once did I let you fall.

Remember that next time you decide to ruminate on how unfair our break-up was.

Me.

Dear ................

I have no idea how the conversation turned the way it did tonight. One minute we were talking 'what ifs' and the next thing I knew it was about me asking for money. In all this time I have never done that. If you know anything about me, you should realize I am the one that repeatedly said you were out of my league because of your wealth.

When you speak of a gift, it's major. Today a new Porsche was mentioned. To me that is inconceivable. I know you come from a different world than I do. Yet caring for someone, in my opinion, is not based on how much they can spend on me.

You left with that as our last conversation tonight. It hurts that you might have even a tiny bit of doubt in what I said. I guess it hurts that I had to defend myself. Yes, we are in a unique situation. We both know that. If money was all I wanted you would have discovered that a long time ago.

I know you won't read this. It's more to get it out of my head than anything. A venting of sorts. Maybe tomorrow will be better for both of us.


Lynn

Dear X,

Here's a suggestion. Print this on index cards & give one to every person you talk to.

"Anything you say to me is subject to being repeated whenever I am drunk or bored and have an audience to entertain. My love for the sound of my own voice is much stronger than any sense of respect I feel for you."

J

*Hugs * and :rose: to all three of you
 
Dear ................

I have no idea how the conversation turned the way it did tonight. One minute we were talking 'what ifs' and the next thing I knew it was about me asking for money. In all this time I have never done that. If you know anything about me, you should realize I am the one that repeatedly said you were out of my league because of your wealth.

When you speak of a gift, it's major. Today a new Porsche was mentioned. To me that is inconceivable. I know you come from a different world than I do. Yet caring for someone, in my opinion, is not based on how much they can spend on me.

You left with that as our last conversation tonight. It hurts that you might have even a tiny bit of doubt in what I said. I guess it hurts that I had to defend myself. Yes, we are in a unique situation. We both know that. If money was all I wanted you would have discovered that a long time ago.

I know you won't read this. It's more to get it out of my head than anything. A venting of sorts. Maybe tomorrow will be better for both of us.


Lynn

:rose: :heart: :kiss:
 
dear headache

You know right where you can go. I don't have time for your bullshit right now:mad:

the shattering head
 
dear headache

You know right where you can go. I don't have time for your bullshit right now:mad:

the shattering head

Dear Chantily,

I'm with ya, I've had a migraine since last night:mad:. Come snuggle with me on the couch and I'll help you forget all about it.:devil:.

~K
 
Dear Zipper Head,

I hope you learned something from today. It isn't what you ride but the fact that you ride. I'm happy I was able to help you out and get you back on the road. Maybe from now on your'll stop looking down your nose at what others ride.

Cat
 
dear nhs,

fuck off, i guess you hit your targets getting rid of me. Thanks for a year of prodding and test to tell me not jack shit. I know your free but fuckoff

piised off
 
dear nhs,

fuck off, i guess you hit your targets getting rid of me. Thanks for a year of prodding and test to tell me not jack shit. I know your free but fuckoff

piised off

Dear Chantily

I know what you mean. If you can, keep bugging til they DO find out what's wrong.

*hugs*

H
 
Dear Chantily

I know what you mean. If you can, keep bugging til they DO find out what's wrong.

*hugs*

H

:kiss::rose::heart:

I know whats wrong they just need to listen and I guess I shouldn't have said it was free considering I pay taxes out the ass to have the nhs service. I'm going into bitch mode when i see the local doctor tomorrow.;)
 
:kiss::rose::heart:

I know whats wrong they just need to listen and I guess I shouldn't have said it was free considering I pay taxes out the ass to have the nhs service. I'm going into bitch mode when i see the local doctor tomorrow.;)

Amen.

Twelve years. *sigh*

Do you get on with your local doc?
 
Dear X,

Leave me the fuck out of your childish games and assorted other bullshit. Newsflash for ya: by the time you're 45, you're supposed to be an adult.

Starting acting like one instead of some pre-pubescent dumbass.

Cloudy
 
Amen.

Twelve years. *sigh*

Do you get on with your local doc?
:kiss:
I do yes. He's a saint who likes to tell me that I amaze him. He agreed with me in the beginning on what it was so we start there again. *shrugs* It'll work out one way or the other. Either they will fix it or we move back to the states so we can have it fixed there.

cloudy~ I'm willing to come kick ass hon;) :kiss::rose::heart:
 
cloudy~ I'm willing to come kick ass hon;) :kiss::rose::heart:

I swear, I've been sitting here with my mouth just hanging open, astonished at the fucking childishness of people who are 45, 47, etc., and they keep wanting to drag me into their mess.

Not gonna happen.
 
Dear ------------
What is with this shit? How many must suffer before the universe bends back on itself and sends but a chimera of relief?
Theres not enough money
Theres not enough maturity
theres not enough respect
theres not enough health
theres not enough of a whole lot of things that make life easier to bear.
Whats with all these fricking migraines people are suffering?
Why do they have to leave their homes and lives just to get appropriate and incisive care?
Why dont the fraggin Doctors LISTEN to women who are suffering? Oh thats right - we're hysterical. Fuck you. You havent seen hysterical or you would NEVER Call us that....
Whats with all these piss poor decisions that must be made because there is no other way it can be imagined to be done differently?
Fuckwads and Sob's wreaking havoc
Vulnerability and heart break the watch word of the days passing in fear and near hopelessness.

Now granted we are taught as a whole that we are fucked no matter what we do ... but Jesus! Sweet Goddess! Enough is enough -
 
Dear ------------
What is with this shit? How many must suffer before the universe bends back on itself and sends but a chimera of relief?
Theres not enough money
Theres not enough maturity
theres not enough respect
theres not enough health
theres not enough of a whole lot of things that make life easier to bear.
Whats with all these fricking migraines people are suffering?
Why do they have to leave their homes and lives just to get appropriate and incisive care?
Why dont the fraggin Doctors LISTEN to women who are suffering? Oh thats right - we're hysterical. Fuck you. You havent seen hysterical or you would NEVER Call us that....
Whats with all these piss poor decisions that must be made because there is no other way it can be imagined to be done differently?
Fuckwads and Sob's wreaking havoc
Vulnerability and heart break the watch word of the days passing in fear and near hopelessness.

Now granted we are taught as a whole that we are fucked no matter what we do ... but Jesus! Sweet Goddess! Enough is enough -


:(:heart:((hugs)):rose::kiss:
 
dear nhs,

fuck off, i guess you hit your targets getting rid of me. Thanks for a year of prodding and test to tell me not jack shit. I know your free but fuckoff

piised off

Dear ------------
What is with this shit? How many must suffer before the universe bends back on itself and sends but a chimera of relief?
Theres not enough money
Theres not enough maturity
theres not enough respect
theres not enough health
theres not enough of a whole lot of things that make life easier to bear.
Whats with all these fricking migraines people are suffering?
Why do they have to leave their homes and lives just to get appropriate and incisive care?
Why dont the fraggin Doctors LISTEN to women who are suffering? Oh thats right - we're hysterical. Fuck you. You havent seen hysterical or you would NEVER Call us that....
Whats with all these piss poor decisions that must be made because there is no other way it can be imagined to be done differently?
Fuckwads and Sob's wreaking havoc
Vulnerability and heart break the watch word of the days passing in fear and near hopelessness.

Now granted we are taught as a whole that we are fucked no matter what we do ... but Jesus! Sweet Goddess! Enough is enough -

* Hugs * :rose:
 
Asswipe...

I am not the one at fault here. YOU listen to everyone that says 'screw her' and you follow them. Damnit-all you never stood up for yourself before. NOW you find a backbone. I'm through with them all. Every single one of you.
 
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