Dear Litster... (continued)

[IhateClowns]

Dear Turkey Baster Litsters,

I'm a sure thing. I will give you the best 22 seconds of your life. If you're lucky then I can hold out for 29 seconds.

Signed,

Quick Draw Clowns

 

[aussiegeekygal]

Dear father of my illegitimate child,

You told me if we did it up the ass I couldn't get pregnant. Jokes on you!

Welcome to child support...

 

[numeniusa]

Dear Turkey Baster Litsters,

I'm a sure thing. I will give you the best 22 seconds of your life. If you're lucky then I can hold out for 29 seconds.

Signed,

Quick Draw Clowns

Dear Quick Draw Litster

I really want to see the next picture in the 'blowing the bubble gum bubble' series. The exploded one.

Please...

'Can't quite imagine the scene' Litster

 

[IhateClowns]

Dear father of my illegitimate child,

You told me if we did it up the ass I couldn't get pregnant. Jokes on you!

Welcome to child support...

Dear Immaculate, yet shitty, conception,

How much is child support for a virtual kid,

Signed,

I have BitCoin and Coupon Reward Points.

 

[aussiegeekygal]

Dear virtual baby daddy,

I'll take that Bitcoin.

Someone who knows what a Bitcoin is worth

 

[IhateClowns]

Dear Quick Draw Litster

I really want to see the next picture in the 'blowing the bubble gum bubble' series. The exploded one.

Please...

'Can't quite imagine the scene' Litster

Dear Imagining,

Thank God it went back in since I haven't shaved in a few days.

Signed,

 

[aussiegeekygal]

Dear bubbly litster,

All I can see is a clit in your mouth.

Willing to volunteer mine, litster

 

[IhateClowns]

Dear virtual baby daddy,

I'll take that Bitcoin.

Someone who knows what a Bitcoin is worth

Dear Currency Counter,

You sure? Double Coupon Tuesday's can save you bunches on TP!

Signed,

Love me soft ultra soft Charman.

 

[IhateClowns]

Dear bubbly litster,

All I can see is a clit in your mouth.

Willing to volunteer mine, litster

Dear Volunteer,

Can I blow a bubble with yours?

Signed,

Hubba Bubba

 

[aussiegeekygal]

Dear Volunteer,

Can I blow a bubble with yours?

Signed,

Hubba Bubba

I once tried to blow a bubble with my boyfriend's foreskin. As cool as it was for me, he was less than impressed.

 

[IhateClowns]

I once tried to blow a bubble with my boyfriend's foreskin. As cool as it was for me, he was less than impressed.

What's a foreskin? Is that one of those penis mud flaps.

 

[aussiegeekygal]

What's a foreskin? Is that one of those mud flaps for a penis?

It's a receptacle for smegma. You can put it on salads.

 

[IhateClowns]

It's a receptacle for smegma. You can put it on salads.

I use it in place of cottage cheese in my lasagna. I had no idea that's where Heinz Smegma came from. Interesting.

 

[aussiegeekygal]

The things you learn on lit

 

[IhateClowns]

The things you learn on lit

Interesting new thread idea. Life lessons learned in lit.

 

[funluvinaj]

Dear Litster...

So wonderful to hear from you. One of my longest friendships here! You were missed, even if you are an MSU fan!

Lets go Hawkeyes Litster!

 

[Misshotndeep]

Dear Lister,

I am glad we meet. Over the last few months you have become a part of my every day and my deepest confidant. As we go though life I hope that we will always be friends and have each others backs. My hope is that you find all the true love your heart can hold, have those kids you are starting to picture in your head and that you find a place where you don't feel so odd and out of place.

Hugs, chuckles and sci-fi


Tumbleweed

 

[Azuldrgon]

Dear Litster...

So wonderful to hear from you. One of my longest friendships here! You were missed, even if you are an MSU fan!

Lets go Hawkeyes Litster!

Dear Hawkeye Litster:
Great to see you.

Admirer Litster.

 

[EroticRomanticMan]

Dear flag waving litster, thank you for the nice exchange!

 

[Papa_Cali]

Dear Litster...

It feels wonderful to be back and reconnected to wonderful friends!

don't be jealous we are just better!

 

[SalaciousWords]

Dear Litster,

Sulking doesn't suit you.

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

Dear Litster-Who-Will-Never-Read-This,

Mistakes are inadvertent errors. I made them but I can no longer regret them. I am human and imperfect, so mistakes are inevitable on this level of life. All anyone can do in response to mistakes, is to take responsibility for them, apologize to any injured parties, try to work to undo what damage was done and act to do what is possible to ensure that the same mistakes are not repeated.

Because I did these things, I know I did what I could to repair our relationship. One thing I could never do is get you to accept my repeated apologies, or allow me to try to act to repair the damage. I couldn't even get you to talk with me about what happened. That will always make me sad, but not regretful; I know in my heart I did everything I could to make things right, or rebuild them on new ground.

One thing I do regret is accepting full responsibility for "killing us" by my two errors. I did need to accept responsibility for my errors and their impact - that part was true. Truthfully, I would have said anything at that point to try to save us and have a chance at repairing the damage I'd caused; I was and am deeply sorry that I caused you and us such pain.

But culpability in this case was shared, even if I bore the bulk of the blame. There were choices you made, words you could have spoken in the moment and actions you could have taken. You're big on "owning your shit." Well, I have owned mine; in this case, you never have.

I believe we could have repaired or rebuilt things, but one person can't make another try. I couldn't make you listen, or even respond. Silence in response to my 13 attempts stands in testament.

I didn't kill us. I injured us, and I'm deeply sorry for that. You let the injured body bleed to death on the floor, while I banged on the door with the EMS personnel.

 

[Miasorrow]

Dear Litster-Who-Will-Never-Read-This,

Mistakes are inadvertent errors. I made them but I can no longer regret them. I am human and imperfect, so mistakes are inevitable on this level of life. All anyone can do in response to mistakes, is to take responsibility for them, apologize to any injured parties, try to work do undo what damage was done and act to do what is possible to ensure that the same mistakes are not repeated.

Because I did these things, I know I did what I could to repair our relationship. One thing I could never do is get you to accept my repeated apologies, or allow me to try to act to repair the damage. I couldn't even get you to talk with me about what happened. That will always make me sad, but not regretful; I know in my heart I did everything I could to make things right, or rebuild them on new ground.

One thing I do regret is accepting full responsibility for "killing us" by my two errors. I did need to accept responsibility for my errors and their impact - that part was true. Truthfully, I would have said anything at that point to try to save us and have a chance at repairing the damage I'd caused. I was and am deeply sorry that I caused you and us such pain.

But culpability in this case was shared, even if I bore the bulk of the blame. There were choices you made, words you could have spoken in the moment and actions you could have taken. You're big on "owning your shit." Well, I have owned mine; in this case, you never have.

I believe we could have repaired or rebuilt things, but one person can't make another try. I couldn't make you listen, or even respond. Silence in response to my 13 attempts is pretty strong evidence.

I didn't kill us. I injured us, and I'm deeply sorry for that. You let the injured body bleed to death on the floor, while I banged on the door with the EMS personnel.

 

[SassySheDevil]

Double beautifully spoken.

 

[Deprived_in_AZ]

Dear didn't kill us Litster,

I forgive you!!!!

Oh wait, that wasn't for me. Crap.

Hope your heart heals soon Litster