Dear Litster... (continued)

[mwmnpa]

Dear Holier Than Thou, Not Up For Fun Threads Lister,

Yes. Three days of board drama is better than talking about hockey. Id'drather have my vasectomy reversed by a monkey with Tourette's.

Sincerely,

Likes Board Drama Lister

Dear Board Drama Whatever,

Holier than thou? Stop projecting your horseshit on me. Go cut up where you feel like it, and let the ones who want to have fun alone. Your snark is about as funny as a heart attack, get over yourself.

Oh yeah, step outside, pick up a ball, and hopefully run with it. But even soccer (shudder) would do you good.

Amazed At Snarky Board Morons Litster

 

[ShelbyBubbles]

It's called the Cowslinger effect.

Is that like the Carbanaro effect?? Am I on a hidden.......camera..........magic......tv show? lol

 

[ShelbyBubbles]

Dear Board Drama Whatever,

Holier than thou? Stop projecting your horseshit on me. Go cut up where you feel like it, and let the ones who want to have fun alone. Your snark is about as funny as a heart attack, get over yourself.

Oh yeah, step outside, pick up a ball, and hopefully run with it. But even soccer (shudder) would do you good.

Amazed At Snarky Board Morons Litster

Dear Amazed,

Spoken like a TRUE hockey fan

Signed,
Glad I'm not in these fireworks

 

[Katie_80]

Dear Holier Than Thou, Not Up For Fun Threads Lister,

Yes. Three days of board drama is better than talking about hockey. Id'drather have my vasectomy reversed by a monkey with Tourette's.

Sincerely,

Likes Board Drama Lister

LMAO

 

[mwmnpa]

Dear Amazed,

Spoken like a TRUE hockey fan

Signed,
Glad I'm not in these fireworks

Dear Fireworks,

He's a somewhat more intelligent troll, but a troll nonetheless. He doesn't realize the greatness of hockey. Hockey talk is fun, and the NHL is, after all, a man's league. That kind of explains a lot.

As far as the ball comment, that's another story.

Seriously, whatever gets discussed here shouldn't be criticized. He wants board bullshit, hey, have at it. Just leave the intelligent people alone.

 

[ShelbyBubbles]

Dear Fireworks,

He's a somewhat more intelligent troll, but a troll nonetheless. He doesn't realize the greatness of hockey. Hockey talk is fun, and the NHL is, after all, a man's league. That kind of explains a lot.

As far as the ball comment, that's another story.

Seriously, whatever gets discussed here shouldn't be criticized. He wants board bullshit, hey, have at it. Just leave the intelligent people alone.

Dear Serious,

Wait....I love hockey! And....I'm a woman! I have boobs to prove it lol I bounce and they go *boingity boingity boingity*
And I said spoken like a true hockey fan cause you shuddered at soccer
AND I gave Pman a lot of drama here last night, probably enough to keep him fat and happy for weeks til he digests it all.

Signed,
Go Sharks!

 

[mwmnpa]

Dear Serious,

Wait....I love hockey! And....I'm a woman! I have boobs to prove it lol I bounce and they go *boingity boingity boingity*
And I said spoken like a true hockey fan cause you shuddered at soccer
AND I gave Pman a lot of drama here last night, probably enough to keep him fat and happy for weeks til he digests it all.

Signed,
Go Sharks!

Dear Winged Shark,

I get you love hockey, are indeed a woman. I understand. So, I guess I didn't make myself clear - any man who doesn't like the Stanley Cup Playoffs should just send his testicles back to God.

I shudder at soccer because I'm a rugby player.

Looking forward to the June Internationals Litster

 

[barefootgirl69]

Dear Litsters,

If you don't like it, start your own thread.

Simple.

Signed,
I like hockey, but I like to laugh, too

 

[ShelbyBubbles]

Dear Litsters,

If you don't like it, start your own thread.

Simple.

Signed,
I like hockey, but I like to laugh, too

Dear Laughy,

I aim to please! In the past 2 days I've talked hockey and added drama and made people laugh. I'm ready for the weekend, how bout you??

Signed,
A little bit of this, A little bit of that.

 

[mwmnpa]

Dear Litsters,

If you don't like it, start your own thread.

Simple.

Signed,
I like hockey, but I like to laugh, too

Dear Like,

Why can't we have both? Isn't that what this thread is about? It's the unicorns and mermaids who are making trouble.

Just sayin' Litster

 

[ElasticMermaid]

Dear Like,

Why can't we have both? Isn't that what this thread is about? It's the unicorns and mermaids who are making trouble.

Just sayin' Litster

How dare you, sir.

 

[mwmnpa]

How dare you, sir.

Couldn't resist, but you started it. LOL!

 

[barefootgirl69]

Dear Laughy,

I aim to please! In the past 2 days I've talked hockey and added drama and made people laugh. I'm ready for the weekend, how bout you??

Signed,
A little bit of this, A little bit of that.

I'm ready for a glass of... something lol.

Dear Like,

Why can't we have both? Isn't that what this thread is about? It's the unicorns and mermaids who are making trouble.

Just sayin' Litster

Unicorns? I missed the unicorns? Now, I'm mad.

 

[ElasticMermaid]

I'm ready for a glass of... something lol.




Unicorns? I missed the unicorns? Now, I'm mad.

(They're everywhere.)

 

[PeteHulbert37]

Dear So. Dissappointed,

You're supposed to present your post in the form of a Dear John, or Mary or whomever and explain what you would like to say in that manner.

Signed,

Has Everyone Abandoned Thread Ettiquette?

 

[Lord Pmann]

Aww. Did you just try to defend my honor? I'm touched.

It's what I do. I'm known as the white knight of Lit for my diplomacy.

Dear Board Drama Whatever,

Holier than thou? Stop projecting your horseshit on me. Go cut up where you feel like it, and let the ones who want to have fun alone. Your snark is about as funny as a heart attack, get over yourself.

Oh yeah, step outside, pick up a ball, and hopefully run with it. But even soccer (shudder) would do you good.

Amazed At Snarky Board Morons Litster

Dear Amazed At Me Lister,

First off, only douchebags like soccer. Those little skinny fuckers fall down and cry if someone sneezes their way. It's like boring hockey.

Secondly, how old do you think I am? Step outside and pick up a ball? Should I play a game of kick the can too before I breakdance down to the arcade for a game of Pacman? Maybe I'll stop at the Tasty Freeze on the way home for a nickel ice cream.

Thirdly, when done properly, heart attacks are funny as hell. Ever seen Sanford and Son? "Oh it's the big one!!!" Funny as hell.

Sincerely,

Can't Run Because I'm Too Fat Lister

 

[Trekka]

Dear Walking at a Leisurely Pace Litster,

Soccer players are hot as fuck. And they've got... Endurance.

Signed,
Ball Loving Litster

 

[Bookishleigh]

Dear Didactic Litster (because it's one of your favorite and most overused words):

I realized today you can search WAY BACK through someone's posts - so ALL those times you told me you never hit on her and that she threw herself at you and you were just trying to be her friend, LIE! I'd link the posts (yes, plural) but I don't want to embarrass her (not that she should be embarrassed about anything other than trusting you).

It's quite obvious you don't know the meaning of the word faithful no matter what relationship you are in. Another post of yours discusses how you let your "true love" go because you were given an ultimatum of "her or me." NOT that I expected you to be faithful to me - I guess I just didn't expect you to be so full of shit.

I feel sorry for the next girl you ensnare with your bullshit - and judging from your posts you already have another one on the line (or those could be lies too - you're pretty good at that). Like I said to you before, I am quite sure you will just tell the next girl you were trying to be MY friend during a difficult time and I threw myself at you - I mean it's pretty much word for word what you told me about the last two women in your life from here.

Signed,
Got your number Litster

P.S. - Don't go throwing the love word around with the next one right away. That would make four of us.... although I'm sure you'll tell her the same lie you told me regarding all that.

P.P.S. - For everyone else I am sorry I didn't do a vocaroo to accompany this. It would have made it the epic rant, I know.

 

[IhateClowns]

Dear Got your Number,

Do I we need to go on Maury Povich regarding our virtual baby? I'm more than ready to get the results.

Signed,

IHC you are NOT the father of that virtual baby.


*sigh*

 

[JennyNo1]

Dear Number-Collecting Litster,

You can only do a vocaroo if you show us your sobbing skills in it. And I don't think you're sobbing over this one.

 

[DoRaMe]

Dear so called "stalker",

I know what people say and think, but you know what I think. I am glad I had the chance to meet you and you still make me happy when you smile. I am glad to call you my friend.

Signed,
Not concerned with others think....

 

[Bookishleigh]

Dear Got your Number,

Do I we need to go on Maury Povich regarding our virtual baby? I'm more than ready to get the results.

Signed,

IHC you are NOT the father of that virtual baby.

*sigh*

Dear Not My Baby Daddy,

It was a total false alarm - turns out you have to unwrap the pregnancy test BEFORE you pee on it. Good to know in the future.

Dear Number-Collecting Litster,

You can only do a vocaroo if you show us your sobbing skills in it. And I don't think you're sobbing over this one.

Yeah, there are NO tears with this one. I just had to get it out of my system because I have long had my suspicions and they have been confirmed (not even by "sad bitches" but the horse's mouth, er, Lit posts). Normally I am not so passive aggressive, but I honestly do not even WANT to open the door of personal dialogue to hear the bullshit I would hear yet again.

I feel better now and think I can finally let it go. I get we all have our baggage here, but don't fucking lie about it knowing your post history is going to trip you up.

Signed,

Dry-eyed Litster

 

[IhateClowns]

Dear Webbed Feet,


Remind me to just hug you and not shake your hands.

Signed,

Wet wipes are a God send

 

[DoRaMe]

Dear West Coast Litster,

Sorry, I am not on often. You know how to find me, the phone number is the same. Glad you are getting your "room" set up since we need to collaborate on a project.

Always your friend as you are mine.

 

[Twlightdreamer]

Dear PG litsters,

The sands in the hour glass are trickling down- nothing will halt their steady flow.

It's sad to see so many hurt or pissed due to other litsters. This is supposed to be our place to escape life's troubles (even if it's for a short time) and instead, it's become another temple of pain/anger.

I wish I could bear your burdens for you but I can't - my shoulders aren't that broad. Be kind to yourselves and forgive (but never forget.) Let karma sort things out in the next life- every one always reat what they sow. We have so few moments together... let's enjoy them while we can, please?

With hugs,
Just Another Flower