Dear Laurel

[Noor]

Dear Laurel,

Three weeks ago, before I left town I got a Hoover Floormate.
The cleaner packaged with it made me wheeze so I found something else to use instead.
I vacuumed all my floors in preparation, but so far I haven't gotten up the whatever to actually try the thing.
I was thinking start small like the bathroom or the kitchen where the floors won't be ruined if I mess up.
Any advice?

Noor, needing some whatever

 

[silver gurl]

Dear Laurel,

Please help Noor with her dilemma.

Please ignore the other Dear Laurel thread. If you don't, please have a nice glass of wine on me. You will need it.

Thank you for putting up with us.

 

[Adjudicator]

Dear Laurel,

What suggestions would you have for someone who is highly disturbed by certain posters etal when those posters aren't violating Lit's terms of service and rules and so on?

A

 

[lovetoread]

Dearest Laurel,

I had to have Sean shoot me a link to figure out this thread. It actually has cool gifs in it.

Love,
LTR

 

[Super-Surprise]

Dear Laurel,

It seems like a good time to change my username.
I am open to you choosing one for me at random.
Please surprise me.

Thanks

 

[RobDownSouth]

Dear Laurel,

It seems so unlike you not to come to the immediate aid of someone plainly in need of vacuuming advice. Is everything okay at home?

Your concerned and devoted favorite librul,
Rob

 

[Pookie]

Dear Laurel,

Let me know if you need me to "take care" of "anything".

Love and kisses,

Pookster <---- blood spattered

 

[Stewart_Pidd]

deer Laurel, is it hunting season there bro?

Stew

 

[RoryN]

Dear Laurel,

Right-wing nutjobs on the GB have been complaining about having their feelings hurt, which they say means free speech doesn't exist here.

Please provide the Safe Space they have requested, wherein their ideas are not challenged by logic or facts, and they cannot be banned under any circumstances.

Also, please pet them and tell them they're good. Behind the ears is the preferred spot.

 

[hashtag45]

Dear Laurel,

Please ask Rory to stop pretending that he has Anne and myself on iggy.

 

[phrodeau]

Dear Laurel,

It seems like a good time to change my username.
I am open to you choosing one for me at random.
Please surprise me.

Thanks

I suggest spelling it in reverse.

 

[Adre]

Dear Laurel,

We know that Hashtag, Hashfag, Hashdrag, and Hashslag are all alts of Query, Conager, and Que. Could you consolidate them into just one annoying poster? Many thanks.

 

[hashtag45]

Stop emulating the creep.

 

[Hashfag45]

Dear laurel,

Ban the vile, perverted paki that has those fetishes about humans below a certain age.

 

[RobDownSouth]

Dear Laurel,

We know that Hashtag, Hashfag, Hashdrag, and Hashslag are all alts of Query, Conager, and Que. Could you consolidate them into just one annoying poster? Many thanks.

Collectively, they comprise the Queerbait Invective Collective.

#LitsAngryLittleMan
#HeTriesSooooHard
#CreativeWritingExercise

 

[Noor]

Dear Laurel,

It seems like a good time to change my username.
I am open to you choosing one for me at random.
Please surprise me.

Thanks

I liked the old one!

 

[Noor]

Dear Laurel,

It's just staring at me! I am trying to work on my dragon costume and that Floormate won't let me be, it keeps calling "Try me," but then the green scales pull me back.
I feel like I am watching a ball in a tennis match and getting nothing done.

Help, Please!

Noor, needs some wings, preferably green.