Damn, she Justa did it again. Still nothing to see.

[draconus_infernus]

well thanks. though I would describe my singing voice more along the lines of ritual feline sacrifice than along the lines of sexy.

Really? Mine is more like nails down a chalkboard. Let me get my banjo and we can destroy everyone’s hearing.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

I have seen exasperated strippers, it is not a pleasant sight.

But the look they give me when I say 'no' might be very different than the one you got when you could not lope around in 8" platform heels.

haha, well yes, would be very different exasperation, in my case it was the funny shaking head while laughing kind, in yours it is the ouch that hurt my wallet type. The 1st is funny, the second is death glare.

Clits have folds, now? Wtf; why did I not receive that memo?

Fuck.
Maybe my vision went bad long before I realized.

lol

Now, see...that's the show I wanna watch in the strip club!

well me trying to learn how to twerk was hilarious. And you'd have even got to watch me fondle strippers asses.

Sexy is also subjective. And the way you described yourself, sexy.

true. I will meet you half way and go with blue collar sexy. You know, the men who don't mind getting dirty and are rough around the edges themselves. I could see it. But I tend to be too much and too out there for those more reserved white collar guys.

 

[TANSTAAFL58]

Now, see...that's the show I wanna watch in the strip club!

Soon. You know you're getting old when you reach for your glasses to make sure you can find the target when going down. (I wish I was kidding).

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

Really? Mine is more like nails down a chalkboard. Let me get my banjo and we can destroy everyone’s hearing.

oh a torture duet. So what song? let me see, the absolute worst recording I have heard of myself was girls just wanna have fun, though drunk total eclipse of the heart duet was a close second, especially when it gets all passionate and strong lol. At least my singing partner was just as bad. Honestly, I think anything soprano will result in the police being called to investigate animal scarifies where as alto would be more animal control trying to find that annoying howling tom cat.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

Soon. You know you're getting old when you reach for your glasses to make sure you can find the target when going down. (I wish I was kidding).

only made funnier because it is true haha.

 

[kdunn762012]

I'd meet you halfway to hell for a crack at your luscious form. Might as well, I'm going that way anyway........

 

[Shyguy1369]

thanks, it was a very fun thread. And my cats seem to think they are comfy.

Oh, I have no doubt they are very comfy indeed

 

[blade_rocknut]

Soon. You know you're getting old when you reach for your glasses to make sure you can find the target when going down. (I wish I was kidding).

Haha! The way my vision has declined in the last year, I believe you. For now though; I'm good with rooting around by tactile cues.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

I'd meet you halfway to hell for a crack at your luscious form. Might as well, I'm going that way anyway........

haha. yeah, I know that trip well.

Oh, I have no doubt they are very comfy indeed

though they are not so comfortable when I am laying on them. Yeah I am that chick at the beach digging holes in the sand before I lay down lol

Haha! The way my vision has declined in the last year, I believe you. For now though; I'm good with rooting around by tactile cues.

ah. yes. I haven't gotten there yet, my best guess is I probably only have a year or two though. Bifocals...so not looking forward to it.

 

[draconus_infernus]

oh a torture duet. So what song? let me see, the absolute worst recording I have heard of myself was girls just wanna have fun, though drunk total eclipse of the heart duet was a close second, especially when it gets all passionate and strong lol. At least my singing partner was just as bad. Honestly, I think anything soprano will result in the police being called to investigate animal scarifies where as alto would be more animal control trying to find that annoying howling tom cat.

And since my banjo playing is still below amateur, the playing will match with our singing. Now that I think about it, our torture duet may be a violation of the Geneva Conventions.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

And since my banjo playing is still below amateur, the playing will match with our singing. Now that I think about it, our torture duet may be a violation of the Geneva Conventions.

Lol. And I am not sure. I will say some the CIA's preferred sound torture songs are some of my favorite songs. Not sure what that says about me.

 

[Shyguy1369]

though they are not so comfortable when I am laying on them. Yeah I am that chick at the beach digging holes in the sand before I lay down lol

Can completely understand that lol... need to be comfy as well

 

[clark_kent]

Lol. And I am not sure. I will say some the CIA's preferred sound torture songs are some of my favorite songs. Not sure what that says about me.

Did I miss all the singing? Mine is worst of all. But I’d be happy to sing Thunder Road to you. Or perhaps a duet of Paradise by the Dashboard Light.
Ok, I better stop. Someone’s eardrums may burst.

 

[chanticleer]

Well happy monday. First I will start with cross posting of all the things from the titties. I like to keep everything together as if I am looking for something, I can just keyword search my threads.

first I official have titties (as in plural now) Yeah, don't ask how I bribed the magic wheel, just leave it at I spun it real hard, several times

I already shared the one for my many wardrobe malfunctions
http://forum.literotica.com/showpost.php?p=91973817&postcount=164

for posting the most titties on the thread
http://i.imgur.com/RLu0Bxum.jpg

for a bizarre rebuttal
http://i.imgur.com/N9WFPQym.jpg
http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?p=90398046#post90398046

and for my talented boobies
http://i.imgur.com/Yykcedcm.jpg
http://forum.literotica.com/showpost.php?p=92001776&postcount=7774

I also presented a few awards, which included some voice and a video with a disclaimer. here is that weirdness
Just a little voice introduction
https://voca.ro/oKx0qDbSJsG


Anyway. On to my introduction drumroll.

First a disclaimer
1) Viewer discretion is advised. You will see things that can’t be unseen and hear things that cannot be unheard. yes, it is that bad.
2) I sincerely apologize to Mr Rapper Dude for butchering his song. Who would have thought that a white rural Floridian chick couldn’t rap. Yes, even Karen is looking at Becky drinking her pumpkin spice latte, waiting for the manager, going “OMG Becky, could this chick be any more white”.
3) Views expressed in this production are expressed solely by my tits and I. Lit or thread owners are released of any responsibility
4) If you or any viewers are butthurt, you can send letters to my tits at Iambutthurtandhaveladycramps@gmail.com attention Tittyofmammothproportion and Slagathor. If only offended by one tit, Slagathor is the left one and Tittyofmammothproportion is the right one. They will give your concerns all the consideration they deserve.
Anyway, without further ado put your hands together as we welcome this years winner of whatever I am introducing.
https://www.***********/s/cikmp7x6u1j1gtt/V_20200302_1253.mp4?dl=0

and of course, my duties as the bouncer of titties

http://i.imgur.com/dtywQGO.gif
http://i.imgur.com/TMhbMHR.gif
http://i.imgur.com/l1SyaDK.gif
http://i.imgur.com/b4ERAP0.gif

then the ending titty applause
http://i.imgur.com/1gckyFc.gif

or video version
https://www.***********/s/m2apr7swzuuytm3/V_20200322_1932244.mp4?dl=0

then my after party outfit, which of course like 2 seconds after the taking this picture, the fed ex guy came. Seriously, I need to stop unintentionally sexually harassing delivery guys. I need like text alerts when they are near

http://i.imgur.com/UZUhlIYm.jpg

and a Titty after party wardrobe malfunction.
http://i.imgur.com/NIPxtlj.gif

and now you are caught up on my sunday selfies.

I want to chime in to thank you again for your wonderful posts. I am such a big fan of you, and to be honest, I flat out worship your tits. Not only do I love your tits, but I'm a big fan of bouncing tits especially, and you have blessed us with bountiful amounts of bouncing lately! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I've been playing a number of your boob bouncing videos on endless loops, over and over, because I enjoy them so much!

And because I've been staying home so much lately to try to remain virus free, your bouncing breasts have been endlessly entertaining! Your bouncing boobs encourage good health! As always, I just can't get over your boobs and I don't want to. Congrats on your titty victories!

 

[TANSTAAFL58]

Haha! The way my vision has declined in the last year, I believe you. For now though; I'm good with rooting around by tactile cues.

I'm just glad i don't have to fumble with a condom.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

Did I miss all the singing? Mine is worst of all. But I’d be happy to sing Thunder Road to you. Or perhaps a duet of Paradise by the Dashboard Light.
Ok, I better stop. Someone’s eardrums may burst.

minimal bad singing from me. oh Meatloaf Duet

I want to chime in to thank you again for your wonderful posts. I am such a big fan of you, and to be honest, I flat out worship your tits. Not only do I love your tits, but I'm a big fan of bouncing tits especially, and you have blessed us with bountiful amounts of bouncing lately! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! I've been playing a number of your boob bouncing videos on endless loops, over and over, because I enjoy them so much!

And because I've been staying home so much lately to try to remain virus free, your bouncing breasts have been endlessly entertaining! Your bouncing boobs encourage good health! As always, I just can't get over your boobs and I don't want to. Congrats on your titty victories!

Thank you. I am glad you enjoy my big bouncing boobs. Just don't stare too long an horizontal stripe videos. it is very dizzying. yes, I suspect those stuck indoors at home need to find ways to entertain themselves. Bouncing boobs might not be too bad of an idea

I'm just glad i don't have to fumble with a condom.

haha. If I can't see well enough to put a condom on someone, there are bigger issues than my eyes. or smaller issues as the case may be. Never had a vision issue with a condom, though have had some wrapper issues that once led to a flying condom. I am good like that.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

happy tuesday. yes, of course I am sharing the traditional titty tuesday titty trifecta

We have me playing around with my tits in bed this morring

http://i.imgur.com/1xQsWOAm.jpg
http://i.imgur.com/Syidc2Em.jpg

conference room titties
http://i.imgur.com/wQELcl8m.jpg

and as a weird little bonus, my titties sleeping peacefully, prior to me waking them. ah reality
http://i.imgur.com/QgWguGjm.jpg

 

[Todger65]

I like Tuesdays. Conference room, branching out. Love it.

 

[draconus_infernus]

happy tuesday. yes, of course I am sharing the traditional titty tuesday titty trifecta

We have me playing around with my tits in bed this morring

http://i.imgur.com/1xQsWOAm.jpg
http://i.imgur.com/Syidc2Em.jpg

conference room titties
http://i.imgur.com/wQELcl8m.jpg

and as a weird little bonus, my titties sleeping peacefully, prior to me waking them. ah reality
http://i.imgur.com/QgWguGjm.jpg

That last picture begs the question of how one rouses sleeping titties.

 

[clark_kent]

Your tits look very peaceful sleeping there in bed. Are they morning tits, or do they take awhile to wake up. Do they like to play in the morning or do they prefer to lie lazily in bed? Clearly your conference room boobs have had their Red Bull and are ready for the day. I hope they get a lot done today.

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

I like Tuesdays. Conference room, branching out. Love it.

well, ya know, I thought I'd try

That last picture begs the question of how one rouses sleeping titties.

lol. then generally wake up with a little movement.

Your tits look very peaceful sleeping there in bed. Are they morning tits, or do they take awhile to wake up. Do they like to play in the morning or do they prefer to lie lazily in bed? Clearly your conference room boobs have had their Red Bull and are ready for the day. I hope they get a lot done today.

well they wake up relatively fast, but they generally don't appear alert until I have started getting dressed. And they like both, depends on the day. We shall see what they manage to get in to today

Absolutely perfect !!!

thank you.

 

[TANSTAAFL58]

minimal bad singing from me. oh Meatloaf Duet



Thank you. I am glad you enjoy my big bouncing boobs. Just don't stare too long an horizontal stripe videos. it is very dizzying. yes, I suspect those stuck indoors at home need to find ways to entertain themselves. Bouncing boobs might not be too bad of an idea



haha. If I can't see well enough to put a condom on someone, there are bigger issues than my eyes. or smaller issues as the case may be. Never had a vision issue with a condom, though have had some wrapper issues that once led to a flying condom. I am good like that.

I was more thinking about the condom package than my package. Years ago I sent a few flying as well.

happy tuesday. yes, of course I am sharing the traditional titty tuesday titty trifecta

We have me playing around with my tits in bed this morring

http://i.imgur.com/1xQsWOAm.jpg
http://i.imgur.com/Syidc2Em.jpg

conference room titties
http://i.imgur.com/wQELcl8m.jpg

and as a weird little bonus, my titties sleeping peacefully, prior to me waking them. ah reality
http://i.imgur.com/QgWguGjm.jpg

I may need to arrange a conference at my new office (AKA the fireplace room / whisky room).

 

[Justadesperatewifeandmom]

I was more thinking about the condom package than my package. Years ago I sent a few flying as well.



I may need to arrange a conference at my new office (AKA the fireplace room / whisky room).

haha, so glad I am not the only one that has had technical difficulties. I still laugh about the time that I was trying to be all cute and sexy and I was going to put one on using m mouth. But yeah, I can't even get the package open without it flying and bouncing off his forehead. Then of course, I can't stop laughing to even be try to pretend that I can be cute and sexy. yeah, still very funny to me. I plan to share that story in vivid detail the first time I attend a dinner with a grandchild's romantic interest.

And whisky would sure make a conference room better.

 

[Goldenfool87]

happy tuesday. yes, of course I am sharing the traditional titty tuesday titty trifecta

We have me playing around with my tits in bed this morring

http://i.imgur.com/1xQsWOAm.jpg
http://i.imgur.com/Syidc2Em.jpg

conference room titties
http://i.imgur.com/wQELcl8m.jpg

and as a weird little bonus, my titties sleeping peacefully, prior to me waking them. ah reality
http://i.imgur.com/QgWguGjm.jpg

If you started a tittie journal you would be bestselling in days... so much interesting stories to tell...
Now that I have seen them sleeping I have to wonder... do they have fond dreams? What woukd they dream of? Maybe that day you went on the trampoline? Or would they concider that a nightmare?

Love,

The fool

 

[TANSTAAFL58]

haha, so glad I am not the only one that has had technical difficulties. I still laugh about the time that I was trying to be all cute and sexy and I was going to put one on using m mouth. But yeah, I can't even get the package open without it flying and bouncing off his forehead. Then of course, I can't stop laughing to even be try to pretend that I can be cute and sexy. yeah, still very funny to me. I plan to share that story in vivid detail the first time I attend a dinner with a grandchild's romantic interest.

And whisky would sure make a conference room better.

I was thinking of trying a new drinking game. Every time some moron sends me an idiotic email (from work) I take a drink. I did a quick count: I would have been impaired by 8:45 and completely hammered an hour later.