Conversation

[rlaflamme]

I have had more misses than hits so far on here. On going conversation seems to consist of me going on for a couple of paragraphs followed by a reply of one sentence! I never thought conversation was a lost art but, blimey, since being on here it seems to be holding true.

Now here is the positive, I have made a connection and only recently, the chat is light and friendly as we are getting to know one another but it's clicking and full of whole paragraphs.

Maybe we are dinosaurs and nowadays our connections are meant to be brief. A throwaway society in everything now.

This is a common problem that I hear about, a paragraph sent and a one line received in reply, almost like they are just replying to keep you going because it is fun and makes one smile to see they have a message waiting for them.

Conversation does seem to be a lost art for many people, and with that makes one wonder about communication as a whole. How do we get people to talk? To get people to open up a bit? It is interesting isn't it? Such simplicity laced with more difficulties than we ever thought.

 

[GeekyhubbyUK]

This is a common problem that I hear about, a paragraph sent and a one line received in reply, almost like they are just replying to keep you going because it is fun and makes one smile to see they have a message waiting for them.

Conversation does seem to be a lost art for many people, and with that makes one wonder about communication as a whole. How do we get people to talk? To get people to open up a bit? It is interesting isn't it? Such simplicity laced with more difficulties than we ever thought.

I work in retail as a manger one of my key jobs is making sure my team can talk and hold a conversation. Some people simply cannot do it, and it's not all about sell, sell, sell it's getting to know people, to converse on a level that allows you to understand them and interact better.

I totally agree with your assessment on the one sentence typers, I also think it makes them feel popular and wanted too, when you keep getting messages that you actually have no interest in.

 

[rlaflamme]

I work in retail as a manger one of my key jobs is making sure my team can talk and hold a conversation. Some people simply cannot do it, and it's not all about sell, sell, sell it's getting to know people, to converse on a level that allows you to understand them and interact better.

I totally agree with your assessment on the one sentence typers, I also think it makes them feel popular and wanted too, when you keep getting messages that you actually have no interest in.

Isn't it odd, we live in a digital age where people cannot keep their eyes off of their phones and continue to text for hours, but try to get them to actually talk and there is nothing but flubber coming from them. It is crazy.

I think there are people that like the attention, for whatever reason, and to keep people strung along with a one sentence reply every time makes them feel needed. Is it intentional? I don't know, maybe, I have no idea. I do smile when I see I have mail waiting for me to read as I am sure most people do when they see the little envelope lit up, it's just the little things I guess.

What it comes down to is conversation is hard, even if it shouldn't be, it is. And I believe most people are afraid of it for some reason.

 

[Reed8]

I work in retail as a manger one of my key jobs is making sure my team can talk and hold a conversation. Some people simply cannot do it, and it's not all about sell, sell, sell it's getting to know people, to converse on a level that allows you to understand them and interact better.

I totally agree with your assessment on the one sentence typers, I also think it makes them feel popular and wanted too, when you keep getting messages that you actually have no interest in.

You made me think of a word that isn't used much outside sales meetings, and corporate offices - Rapport. Rapport consists of understanding and communicating well with another person. It takes patience and determination to get to the second and third layers of the onion. (sometimes) You may not find the treasure on the first shovel full of dirt. You might have to keep digging.

What I find is that the effort doesn't want to be made.I could be jaded in this notion but it flows over into other aspects of the world. Making an attempt once and then giving it up as an impossible state seems to be status quo. For anyone who has ever had a good relationship with good communication has experienced an existence of a natural ebb and flow in conversation. One can not expect that it be perfect, but one must realize that it takes a bit of effort from both parties. And there is nothing we can do if the other party doesn't want to give.

 

[Reed8]

Isn't it odd, we live in a digital age where people cannot keep their eyes off of their phones and continue to text for hours, but try to get them to actually talk and there is nothing but flubber coming from them. It is crazy.

I think there are people that like the attention, for whatever reason, and to keep people strung along with a one sentence reply every time makes them feel needed. Is it intentional? I don't know, maybe, I have no idea. I do smile when I see I have mail waiting for me to read as I am sure most people do when they see the little envelope lit up, it's just the little things I guess.

What it comes down to is conversation is hard, even if it shouldn't be, it is. And I believe most people are afraid of it for some reason.

There is a little bit of a high that bursts through my body when I see that I have a private message or an email from someone I have been conversing with.Its exciting in an opening a present kind of way. You may not know what is under the wrapping.

I like attention and I have resolved that some people may not be able to express them selves verbally in the way they like. I prefer a one sentence reply to no reply. I am more than happy to give someone attention. Yeah sure some may be attention whores and it can be easily recognized. But for me at the end of the day I think I just prefer letting things play out to see what happens next.

 

[GeekyhubbyUK]

There is a little bit of a high that bursts through my body when I see that I have a private message or an email from someone I have been conversing with.Its exciting in an opening a present kind of way. You may not know what is under the wrapping.

I like attention and I have resolved that some people may not be able to express them selves verbally in the way they like. I prefer a one sentence reply to no reply. I am more than happy to give someone attention. Yeah sure some may be attention whores and it can be easily recognized. But for me at the end of the day I think I just prefer letting things play out to see what happens next.

I play things out, but I cannot get a feel for someone if their replies give me nothing to really work with and single sentences give me nothing "Wow that's great tell me more", "Well I work late shifts", "i am too shy to tell you much, can you just tell me stuff we can get off together with." These are actual responses, maybe I am asking too much but I don't want to put effort in if others don't want to.

I get the high of a new message too! It should be bottled and sold.

 

[Reed8]

I play things out, but I cannot get a feel for someone if their replies give me nothing to really work with and single sentences give me nothing "Wow that's great tell me more", "Well I work late shifts", "i am too shy to tell you much, can you just tell me stuff we can get off together with." These are actual responses, maybe I am asking too much but I don't want to put effort in if others don't want to.

I get the high of a new message too! It should be bottled and sold.

Yeah that can be frustrating. I have been down that road many times myself and still continue to get those types of responses. A few gems pop up every now and again and those are the ones that keep me going. Sometimes I feel people just don't want to give up too much as a protection to themselves. In the end their responses seem curt, hollow and generic. People to some degree will only give you want they want to give you.

 

[rlaflamme]

Trying to get information to work on from people can be like pulling teeth at times. It seems although we are here on a site that gives all sorts of information we hold in a lot of what we are. Is it because we have been burned? Because we worry about being judged? Worried about getting to close? Who knows. If you are on here enough you will most likely get ghosted at least once, say good-bye to someone you prefer to keep talking to, and there is a good chance at some time, you will figure out who you are talking to is actually the opposite gender pretending to be the gender you think you are talking to.

Everything is a risk, from little to a lot, you just have to decide how much you are willing to put out there.

 

[Bjerget]

Happy Friday afternoon to everyone. I hope this weekend will be a nice one. Time has, once again, gotten away from me, but now I have a little while to catch up.

Today's drink: Gin and Tonic. I got a really nice dry London gin and a glass of original Schewps Tonic water to go with it. I'm really enjoying it.

 

[The_gladiator]

Happy Friday afternoon to everyone. I hope this weekend will be a nice one. Time has, once again, gotten away from me, but now I have a little while to catch up.

Today's drink: Gin and Tonic. I got a really nice dry London gin and a glass of original Schewps Tonic water to go with it. I'm really enjoying it.

Was this put in the wrong thread by chance? It feels a touch out of place. But awesome to see you , it’s been too long.
I’m working so so far no alcohol for me, but perhaps tonight.

 

[Bjerget]

Was this put in the wrong thread by chance? It feels a touch out of place. But awesome to see you , it’s been too long.
I’m working so so far no alcohol for me, but perhaps tonight.

It was not but thanks for checking in. I do, on occasion, post in other threads that catch my fancy. I'm not sure why it feels that out of place but *shrug* okay.

It has been a while since we chatted last. I've given up skype, but I'm using discord these days if you fancy a chat, otherwise here or there is fine.

What are you doing for work these days? I can't drink on my job either. Alcohol and machinery do not mix!

 

[rlaflamme]

Good to see you both again

A bit of a drink huh? Some whiskey straight up would be great. No drinking on the job of course

 

[SophiaRose7]

Good to see you both again

A bit of a drink huh? Some whiskey straight up would be great. No drinking on the job of course

Hiya friend

 

[rlaflamme]

Hiya friend

Greetings! I hope all has been well for you

 

[The_gladiator]

It was not but thanks for checking in. I do, on occasion, post in other threads that catch my fancy. I'm not sure why it feels that out of place but *shrug* okay.

It has been a while since we chatted last. I've given up skype, but I'm using discord these days if you fancy a chat, otherwise here or there is fine.

What are you doing for work these days? I can't drink on my job either. Alcohol and machinery do not mix!

Discord is a pain in the behind. but I do have one. If I got suckered into adding a spam bot a few weeks ago I could try to ad you or have you add me.

I could at least send you a PM

I have been at my current job for a year now. I do a lot of paperwork and some educating and paperwork on educating and more paperwork... did I mention the paperwork?

you know I think the post felt out of place because I so often think of this thread as having metaconversation in it, you know conversation about conversation, to a point that in my mind it seemed out of wack to just have a conversation, but it seems as if you have started a trend and so lets actually have some conversation in the conversation thread. Who'd have thunk it. lol

yes, alcohol and machinery don't mix, ever... that would be bad lol.

I totally get that high feeling when you get a message. I get that all the time and have ben known to refresh my lit a lot waiting for a reply haha.

 

[rlaflamme]

Discord is a pain in the behind. but I do have one. If I got suckered into adding a spam bot a few weeks ago I could try to ad you or have you add me.

I could at least send you a PM

I have been at my current job for a year now. I do a lot of paperwork and some educating and paperwork on educating and more paperwork... did I mention the paperwork?

you know I think the post felt out of place because I so often think of this thread as having metaconversation in it, you know conversation about conversation, to a point that in my mind it seemed out of wack to just have a conversation, but it seems as if you have started a trend and so lets actually have some conversation in the conversation thread. Who'd have thunk it. lol

yes, alcohol and machinery don't mix, ever... that would be bad lol.

I totally get that high feeling when you get a message. I get that all the time and have ben known to refresh my lit a lot waiting for a reply haha.

Once in a while we get a decent little conversation going here, it is refreshing and nice to see

As for refreshing your page hoping to see the message symbol light up, yup, been there, done that lol.

 

[MrDevereaux]

I’m glad I’m not the only one that gets a little high when I get a new message!

Any conversation starter in a silence is a good one, even if it doesn’t generate conversation in the intended directions, it sets one going on any direction.

Tonic water is a staple of my liquid diet, without the gin, I don’t drink alcohol (four weeks without, at the moment). Schweppes is blooming expensive to drink it as I do. The Fever Tree tonics are supposed to be quite delectable, best paired with the expensive gins. I’ve heard that some are better paired with cucumber than lime/lemon.

It’s raining, again (insert song with word ‘rain’ in title) ... wasn’t on the forecast and quite relieved I didn’t set out for a walk that I had half planned.

 

[rlaflamme]

I’m glad I’m not the only one that gets a little high when I get a new message!

Any conversation starter in a silence is a good one, even if it doesn’t generate conversation in the intended directions, it sets one going on any direction.

Tonic water is a staple of my liquid diet, without the gin, I don’t drink alcohol (four weeks without, at the moment). Schweppes is blooming expensive to drink it as I do. The Fever Tree tonics are supposed to be quite delectable, best paired with the expensive gins. I’ve heard that some are better paired with cucumber than lime/lemon.

It’s raining, again (insert song with word ‘rain’ in title) ... wasn’t on the forecast and quite relieved I didn’t set out for a walk that I had half planned.

And really that is it, you sit in silence, just clicking away at the keyboard, scrolling the site with no real destination, and BOOM! the little message clicks up. You click in, read it, respond, or not I guess and the distraction of monotony is great.

You either continue to talk to the person or you don't. I am not sure if anyone has an expectation when starting a conversation or not. I think when we send a message we have a hope of finding a connection and that is the best we can do.

 

[Bjerget]

Good to see you both again

A bit of a drink huh? Some whiskey straight up would be great. No drinking on the job of course

I do like a really nice whiskey. Scapa comes to mind as one of my faves. I just had regular danish beer today... nothing exciting by any means, but it is nice to have with supper.

 

[Bjerget]

Discord is a pain in the behind. but I do have one. If I got suckered into adding a spam bot a few weeks ago I could try to ad you or have you add me.

I could at least send you a PM

I have been at my current job for a year now. I do a lot of paperwork and some educating and paperwork on educating and more paperwork... did I mention the paperwork?

you know I think the post felt out of place because I so often think of this thread as having metaconversation in it, you know conversation about conversation, to a point that in my mind it seemed out of wack to just have a conversation, but it seems as if you have started a trend and so lets actually have some conversation in the conversation thread. Who'd have thunk it. lol

yes, alcohol and machinery don't mix, ever... that would be bad lol.

I totally get that high feeling when you get a message. I get that all the time and have ben known to refresh my lit a lot waiting for a reply haha.

Sure I'll add you- message me with your handle (and remember the four numbers at the end otherwise it won't work!)

Ugh your job does sound a bit paperwork heavy. In a kind of soul crushing way. I hope it doesn't bog you down too much hehe.

And LOL okay! I heard you like conversation dog, so I got you some conversation for your conversation!! XD Hah, I slay me... *eyeroll and laughter*

Welllll... in the olden days, my coworkers used to drink in shifts and take naps after to pass the day by. But now we have all sorts of quality standards and bosses present on all three shifts, so those sorts of things don't fly anymore. But I'm sure it was awesome fun while it lasted!

I'm a little meh on PM's anymore. Most of them are standard issue guy. "Hi my name is ..... I'm a (insert age here) male from (insert location here) and if you ever want to chat, write me." Like what reason do I have to even write back? There is no substance, no personality nothing but a random dick attached to an uninteresting person who has no idea how to captivate a person. Ugh no thanks random dudes. I'm not interested! LOL

 

[Bjerget]

I’m glad I’m not the only one that gets a little high when I get a new message!

Any conversation starter in a silence is a good one, even if it doesn’t generate conversation in the intended directions, it sets one going on any direction.

Tonic water is a staple of my liquid diet, without the gin, I don’t drink alcohol (four weeks without, at the moment). Schweppes is blooming expensive to drink it as I do. The Fever Tree tonics are supposed to be quite delectable, best paired with the expensive gins. I’ve heard that some are better paired with cucumber than lime/lemon.

It’s raining, again (insert song with word ‘rain’ in title) ... wasn’t on the forecast and quite relieved I didn’t set out for a walk that I had half planned.

FeverTree is wonderful tonic water- very tasty. I like the blood orange flavoured one, myself. Congrats on the sobriety.

 

[PrivateBrowsingMode]

I like your post. I always feel this way.

 

[The_gladiator]

Sure I'll add you- message me with your handle (and remember the four numbers at the end otherwise it won't work!)

Ugh your job does sound a bit paperwork heavy. In a kind of soul crushing way. I hope it doesn't bog you down too much hehe.

And LOL okay! I heard you like conversation dog, so I got you some conversation for your conversation!! XD Hah, I slay me... *eyeroll and laughter*

Welllll... in the olden days, my coworkers used to drink in shifts and take naps after to pass the day by. But now we have all sorts of quality standards and bosses present on all three shifts, so those sorts of things don't fly anymore. But I'm sure it was awesome fun while it lasted!

I'm a little meh on PM's anymore. Most of them are standard issue guy. "Hi my name is ..... I'm a (insert age here) male from (insert location here) and if you ever want to chat, write me." Like what reason do I have to even write back? There is no substance, no personality nothing but a random dick attached to an uninteresting person who has no idea how to captivate a person. Ugh no thanks random dudes. I'm not interested! LOL

You were one of my favorite people to pm with, always worked better for us than when we tried IM wonder if that’s cause of the time difference, I dunno.
That brings up an interesting point sometimes pm conversation can differ slightly from instant messenger conversation. IM has that instant gratification thing going for it, but sometimes in pm I feel you can actually take your time to craft a response and sometimes even provide more details.

I see where you’re coming from I’m not sure I’d respond to that type of pm either ls.

 

[LadyJS]

Tonic water is a staple of my liquid diet, without the gin, I don’t drink alcohol (four weeks without, at the moment). Schweppes is blooming expensive to drink it as I do. The Fever Tree tonics are supposed to be quite delectable, best paired with the expensive gins. I’ve heard that some are better paired with cucumber than lime/lemon.

Congrats on that. Sobriety isn't an easy thing to maintain, especially if you were a heavy drinker like I was (2+ years sober). As a substitute, for a carbonated drink, I go through several caffeine-free Diet Coke's every day. Probably not good for me, but at least they don't leave me with a hangover.

 

[MrDevereaux]

Congrats on that. Sobriety isn't an easy thing to maintain, especially if you were a heavy drinker like I was (2+ years sober). As a substitute, for a carbonated drink, I go through several caffeine-free Diet Coke's every day. Probably not good for me, but at least they don't leave me with a hangover.

I’d been sober for almost five months when I decided to have one drink on my birthday. Didn’t enjoy it as much as thought i would. It is hard staying sober in a culture where alcohol is linked to celebration or the idea of relaxation.

If good root beer was readily available in the same way as Coke or its variants, i’d Drink that. There is a brand that is reasonably priced, which I get every so often and savour it!