Communication

[impressive]

This is a HUGE thing with me. What's the real question here? How to communicate in order to understand and be understood?

Good way to put it. Not all communication is effective. If attempts at understanding or being understood fail, when/how/why did they fail?

How likely is it that we keep using that same methods of ineffective communication rather than trying a new approach?

 

[mismused]

Okay -- I can see this somewhat. I can definitely see the frustration in beating one's head against the walls of another's reality while pleading, "Let me in!"

Again, we're back to understanding and being understood ...

=========================

Okay, since you bit on it (you poor thing ), I'll go another step for you:

Other scientists say that it is impossible for any of us to apprehend/know directly, any other person. ????

What, we're told, it is that we see is a reportage of another being in our midst, our area, and this is reported by our senses, albeit at, most likely, the speed of light (186,000 miles per second) so that what we think we sense is made to seem as real time, but actually isn't.

Our senses project what is apprehended to a dark area in our brain (dark because we're the only light there, so to speak), and, again, at most likely the speed of light, we have the interpretations according as we've learned to interpret.

Heck of a mess, huh? If it's true, that is. BTW, this was all reported by a national "financial" newspaper in three parts on the front page, and extensively so.

That brings us back to who, how do we communicate. If the above is true, we communicate indirectly, and, most likely, with a lot, or possibly a few, assumptions.

So, how well do we really know the person? How well do we understand ourselves, and how well do we put it all together. Since each of the other persons is a different reality (?), then it follows the the fun/frustration follows.

Something like empathy comes into play here, but how much of it is from BOTH sides, or is it just from the one side? IOW, how well a "connection" do we have with that person already.

Okay, okay, I'll shut up. Hope this doesn't kill your thread as some of my posts often do (sorry, Mat, I have a better track record of that ).

mismused, and often confused

 

[impressive]

Other scientists say that it is impossible for any of us to apprehend/know directly, any other person. ????

Oh, I don't think you're a thread-killer. The whole subject of communication -- as it pertains to understanding and being understood -- is fascinating to me.

How many of us don't open ourselves up to understanding out of fear? How many of us don't truly seek to understand others for fear of coming face-to-face with our own demons?

How in the hell do we get ANYTHING accomplished living in multiple realities with no true connections?

I dream of the ultimate relationship in which communication is THE foundation upon which trust and joy flourish. Doesn't even have to be a sexual relationship -- although once such a nirvana is attained, I think sex is a natural part of it.

Gettin' deep here, peoples. Love it!

 

[mismused]

Oh, I don't think you're a thread-killer. The whole subject of communication -- as it pertains to understanding and being understood -- is fascinating to me.

How many of us don't open ourselves up to understanding out of fear? How many of us don't truly seek to understand others for fear of coming face-to-face with our own demons?

How in the hell do we get ANYTHING accomplished living in multiple realities with no true connections?

I dream of the ultimate relationship in which communication is THE foundation upon which trust and joy flourish. Doesn't even have to be a sexual relationship -- although once such a nirvana is attained, I think sex is a natural part of it.

Gettin' deep here, peoples. Love it!

=========================

Ooops! Now you're getting into meditation/yoga, and maybe a bit of mind melding, if that's possible. Buddhists may think it is.

If so, maybe then you're into non-thought, and as far as sex, er, hmm, you may well be surprised to find that tantra isn't the best sex after all. Lots of possibilities here (both for communication, and for sex, which, after all, is communication of a sort).

mismused, and now bemused

 

[impressive]

Lots of possibilities here (both for communication, and for sex, which, after all, is communication of a sort).

Arguably the ultimate in communication. Are we EVER more open than when climaxing?

 

[ABSTRUSE]

I have comprehension problems right now, so if I missed this, just ignore me.

what about the silent communication? ya know the connection you have with someone to read their mind?

I talked to someone on IM I haven't chatted with in a while and it was just like we spoke yesterday, we would type the same thing at the same time and then laugh.

or the look you give someone and they know you've both spotted the lady wearing the spandex biker shorts and both know that it is sooooo wrong and you laugh.

what the hell am I rambling on about?

 

[lucky-E-leven]

I dream of the ultimate relationship in which communication is THE foundation upon which trust and joy flourish. Doesn't even have to be a sexual relationship -- although once such a nirvana is attained, I think sex is a natural part of it.

This was always my dream. When I was in college (the first time, people ) I used to think that it was impossible to merge two minds/hearts/souls completely, especially in the area of communicating all thoughts and feelings. I was in a relationship for 11 years where it was common practice to just hold it in if it would rock the boat. Not that I even did that very well, but it was the unwritten rule. It worked (mostly) for a long time. Key word: worked. At the end of that relationship, I realized that understanding held the same kind of indescribable power/joy that love does. I must say, mixing them both into a relationship is as close to bliss as it gets.



~lucky

p.s. I think there are only two people in the entire world that completely understand me.

 

[impressive]

I must say, mixing them both into a relationship is as close to bliss as it gets.

*envious*

Oh, the potential's definitely there. *sigh* Maybe someday ...

 

[impressive]

what about the silent communication? ya know the connection you have with someone to read their mind?

Very real to me. We discussed it a bit re empathy earlier. That sort of connection is priceless -- HOWEVER, I still think verbal communication is needed.

 

[Guest]

 

[lucky-E-leven]

*envious*

Oh, the potential's definitely there. *sigh* Maybe someday ...

It's funny, because as much as I dreamt of it, I'm not sure I fully believed it was possible. Still boggles the mind and I can't help but wait for the other shoe to drop, only I'm not sure how that can happen. No secrets and no holding back doesn't leave much room for in-communication. Just gotta stay on top of mis-communication. *shrug*

~lucky

p.s. I think you're trying too hard to communicate. P'raps you need to try a little more tongue action?

p.p.s. Here's an image... You and her (best girlfriend) heatedly discussing when suddenly, you lean in and slide your tongue into her mouth....

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Very real to me. We discussed it a bit re empathy earlier. That sort of connection is priceless -- HOWEVER, I still think verbal communication is needed.

I like to yell alot, does that help?

 

[lucky-E-leven]

I like to yell alot, does that help?

Gets the dog in out of the rain, doesn't it?

~lucky

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Gets the dog in out of the rain, doesn't it?

~lucky

Not my stupid dog.

 

[impressive]

p.s. I think you're trying too hard to communicate. P'raps you need to try a little more tongue action?

p.p.s. Here's an image... You and her (best girlfriend) heatedly discussing when suddenly, you lean in and slide your tongue into her mouth....

Geez, Lucky -- the kids are due home any second and you pick NOW to plant that image! Thanks a LOT!

 

[lucky-E-leven]

Not my stupid dog.

and one for Molly

 

[lucky-E-leven]

Geez, Lucky -- the kids are due home any second and you pick NOW to plant that image! Thanks a LOT!

Anytime, love.

~lucky

Imp

 

[ABSTRUSE]

and one for Molly

thank you, I didn't think anyone heard me.

 

[impressive]

I like to yell alot, does that help?

Depends. Yelling in ecstacy? Ayup!

The other kind? Often not.

I yell at the wrong people -- typically my kids. When I need to shout and be confrontational, I'm not. I absorb it, go home, and then write a 10-page letter in response. LOL

 

[mismused]

Arguably the ultimate in communication. Are we EVER more open than when climaxing?

==========================

Maybe not so open "open," as revealing our joy so openly. However, I understand that is what usually happens with each orgasms, even in a drunken stupor. Yeah, I know that's not what you meant, just trying to keep you straight. Silly me, huh?


I think Lucky is ready for none-thought melding. Bet you'd love it if it was done with sex. There are some interesting things that our bodies can do. May the Goddess bless you in your efforts.

mismused

 

[ABSTRUSE]

Well I had some prolific words that I posted and they were lost in cyber hell and now I can't remember them.

 

[impressive]

... just trying to keep you straight.

Lost cause.

 

[impressive]

Well I had some prolific words that I posted and they were lost in cyber hell and now I can't remember them.

I fuckin' HATE it when that happens! (Now's a good time to yell.)

 

[ABSTRUSE]

I fuckin' HATE it when that happens! (Now's a good time to yell.)

Fuckshitdamn!!!

okay, I'm leaving here since this is going to turn into therapy for me and that's not the intent of this thread...sorry.

 

[impressive]

okay, I'm leaving here since this is going to turn into therapy for me and that's not the intent of this thread...sorry.

It's been therapy for ME -- and I am a sharing type of person. Stay. Pull up a couch. Tell me about your childhood.