Comedy Of Errors

[Guru]

OF SYRACUSE


I think thou art in mind, and so am I.

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE


Nay, master, both in mind and in my shape.
ANTIPHOLUS

 

[Guru]

OF SYRACUSE


Thou hast thine own form.

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE


No, I am an ape.

 

[Guru]

LUCIANA


If thou art changed to aught, 'tis to an ass.

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE


'Tis true; she rides me and I long for grass.
'Tis so, I am an ass; else it could never be
But I should know her as well as she knows me.

 

[Guru]

ADRIANA


Come, come, no longer will I be a fool,
To put the finger in the eye and weep,
Whilst man and master laugh my woes to scorn.
Come, sir, to dinner. Dromio, keep the gate.
Husband, I'll dine above with you to-day
And shrive you of a thousand idle pranks.
Sirrah, if any ask you for your master,
Say he dines forth, and let no creature enter.
Come, sister. Dromio, play the porter well.
ANTIPHOLUS

 

[Guru]

OF SYRACUSE


Am I in earth, in heaven, or in hell?
Sleeping or waking? mad or well-advised?
Known unto these, and to myself disguised!
I'll say as they say and persever so,
And in this mist at all adventures go.

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE


Master, shall I be porter at the gate?

 

[Guru]

ADRIANA


Ay; and let none enter, lest I break your pate.

 

[Guru]

LUCIANA


Come, come, Antipholus, we dine too late.

Exeunt

 

[Guru]

ACT III
SCENE I. Before the house of ANTIPHOLUS of Ephesus.



Enter ANTIPHOLUS of Ephesus, DROMIO of Ephesus, ANGELO, and BALTHAZAR




ANTIPHOLUS

 

[Guru]

OF EPHESUS


Good Signior Angelo, you must excuse us all;
My wife is shrewish when I keep not hours:
Say that I linger'd with you at your shop
To see the making of her carcanet,
And that to-morrow you will bring it home.
But here's a villain that would face me down
He met me on the mart, and that I beat him,
And charged him with a thousand marks in gold,
And that I did deny my wife and house.
Thou drunkard, thou, what didst thou mean by this?

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF EPHESUS


Say what you will, sir, but I know what I know;
That you beat me at the mart, I have your hand to show:
If the skin were parchment, and the blows you gave were ink,
Your own handwriting would tell you what I think.
ANTIPHOLUS

 

[Guru]

OF EPHESUS


I think thou art an ass.

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF EPHESUS


Marry, so it doth appear
By the wrongs I suffer and the blows I bear.
I should kick, being kick'd; and, being at that pass,
You would keep from my heels and beware of an ass.
ANTIPHOLUS

 

[Guru]

OF EPHESUS


You're sad, Signior Balthazar: pray God our cheer
May answer my good will and your good welcome here.

 

[Guru]

BALTHAZAR


I hold your dainties cheap, sir, and your
welcome dear.
ANTIPHOLUS

 

[Guru]

OF EPHESUS


O, Signior Balthazar, either at flesh or fish,
A table full of welcome make scarce one dainty dish.

 

[Guru]

BALTHAZAR


Good meat, sir, is common; that every churl affords.
ANTIPHOLUS

 

[Guru]

OF EPHESUS


And welcome more common; for that's nothing but words.

 

[Guru]

BALTHAZAR


Small cheer and great welcome makes a merry feast.
ANTIPHOLUS

 

[Guru]

OF EPHESUS


Ay, to a niggardly host, and more sparing guest:
But though my cates be mean, take them in good part;
Better cheer may you have, but not with better heart.
But, soft! my door is lock'd. Go bid them let us in.

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF EPHESUS


Maud, Bridget, Marian, Cicel, Gillian, Ginn!

 

[Guru]

DROMIO OF SYRACUSE


[Within] Mome, malt-horse, capon, coxcomb,
idiot, patch!
Either get thee from the door, or sit down at the hatch.
Dost thou conjure for wenches, that thou call'st
for such store,
When one is one too many? Go, get thee from the door.