Chastity, forced male chastity, and Eroticism.

[Norway_1705]

In my ideal scenario the sub never knows when or if

Exactly.
I get annoyed by captioning that mentions “release on your birthday” (what about... friends and relatives?) or “release in two weeks, but I'll add a day if you don't do... the dishes.” (!)
I can see how it might be exciting for the readers, but not for the character. The character will be bored, resigned, lacking enthusiasm for all the time already scheduled!
I agree, too, that it is much more effective if a potential release could happen any day, any time. That way, any minute could be “the magic one” and he would be perpetually on tension.

 

[Norway_1705]

According to an adage circulating on the Net (both from social psychologists and women experts in “misunderstood males”), it is this:

A), women never talk about facts but only about emotions, ... whereas,

B), men only talk about facts but never about emotions.

Obviously, an erotic literature site is the least appropriate place. The most obtuse and brutal males do not look for long novels: they jerk off to a three-minute clip and then shut down the Internet.

On an erotic literature site, chances are that a large percentage of the readers are either very sensitive men (straight), gay men, or women (straight or lesbian).

Thus, it is very likely that authors write about males talking about feelings, and females talking about emotions.

Or, and this is what happens most often in the “Forced Male Chastity - Caged Cock – FLR” category, the roles between the two genders are reversed.

The wife behaves like the traditional male figure of the 1950s: she earns more than her husband, she comes back home always late in the evening, she always drives his big car, she travels more than he does, she always goes out while he stays home (making chores and cooking). [Sorry, I recently saw the movie “Don't Worry Darling” (2022) about gender stereotypes in the 1950s... a bad movie, but nice costumes.]

The husband behaves like the traditional female figure of the 1950s: kind, submissive, shy, willing to be useful as a servant, totally friendless, with no profession or any interest outside the home (or with an unimportant lesser job, that does not make him “important” anyway).

Consequently (or does it?), it seems obvious to both readers and writers to imagine a dialogue in which the wife gives only dry orders in an assertive tone (male), and the husband responds with emotionalism and tears (female).

Example.

Baroness Hildegard Von Aubsburg was a strong and highly successful woman. Her husband, nicknamed Tiny Tim, had given up his trade and stayed at home as a housewife.

Every night very late, his wife would come home after drinking with colleagues in the pub. He would open the door naked, on his knees, with the perennial cage worn.

He would say phrases full of emotion, such as, “Thank you for coming back to fill my useless day with light, my Goddess. How can I do to delight your precious rest? I hope you are serene, but if you are not, I will do everything to soothe your dinner...”

She gave only dry orders as if she were speaking to a strange servant in a hotel. “Pick up my coat from the floor. I want white wine: champagne. In the drawing room.”

He replied with a thousand emotions, “Oh, thank you for speaking to me, my Queen! This afternoon loneliness was oppressing me, and then I got your text message, the one with a padlock and a question mark. So I immediately took a picture of myself! From that moment on, ironing your clothes was sweet for me, even though the spikes were sticking into my locked-up cock, I felt that suffering filled my heart with a delicious passion for you, with the hope that you would still want to ... I won't say give me a release, which I dare not even imagine ... but at least that you would text me again before dinner!”

She replied dryly, “No. I was at the club with someone else. The room was hot.”

.

Am I wrong? Are traditional roles reversed in dialogues as well? Do we have examples other than this one?

 

[Norway_1705]

Horsebreaking. I know nothing about horses and equestrianism, but I read today that there was a fashion in Victorian England of training a wild horse to the point of “breaking” its wild will and forcing it into submission. (I guess the whole "bondage ponyplay" has to do with that but it's not my cup of tea, sorry.)
It seems that the concept was very fashionable because of the metaphor of how the “civilized” British subjugated the wild people, but I'll put that argument aside.
The question is this: why do I often read in Femdom tales, about the wife's willingness to “break” her husband?
Is this a distant echo of a Victorian trope?

Wait! Is this the reason, why riding crops and leather knee-high boots are "always" associater with the trope figure of a pro Dominatrix?
I personally prefer a Keyholder-wife more free and confortable, and less “forced” to... dress to impress: but I understand that a uniform... it may help.
The artistic reference is to Edwin Henry Landseer's painting, “The Shrew Tamed,” 1861 - most famous by the nickname “The Pretty Horse Breaker”. (maybe the model was Annie Gilbert, idk).

 

[AwkwardlySet]

Wait! Is this the reason, why riding crops and leather knee-high boots are "always" associater with the trope figure of a pro Dominatrix?

As much as I dislike the tropey depictions of what dominant women wear, that one is even preferable to the omnipresent depiction of a domme in full latex and high-heeled platform boots. Not only do I find that tacky, but it also goes against common sense unless we are talking about a professional dominatrix dressing up for clients, which isn't that often the case in the stories.

 

[Norway_1705]

As much as I dislike the tropey depictions of what dominant women wear, that one is even preferable to the omnipresent depiction of a domme in full latex and high-heeled platform boots. Not only do I find that tacky, but it also goes against common sense unless we are talking about a professional dominatrix dressing up for clients, which isn't that often in the stories.

YES! That is Exactly what I meant to say. In the case of forced male chastity, we read all the time about husbands “proposing” this (as a toy or as a Lifestyle) but also about “reluctant” wives.
Why, I wonder? Perhaps precisely because “professional women” have long exhibited that complicated and uncomfortable “uniform,” which seems made more to satisfy the “visual gaze” of the male (victim or spectator) than to satisfy the lazy selfish indolence of the “Mistress.”
Perhaps it is no accident, if it appears from the posts that many women perceive the Keyholder role as “tiring additional chores”?
Perhaps an Owner, a Queen, a Goddess, should not wear some kind of latex trap on her body on purpose. Nor annoying heels, just to satiate the eyes of the beholder (who will often be blindfolded!).
Perhaps a real Keyholder-wife is more recognizable in this picture: a fully clothed woman, relaxed and comfortable, holding the reins of a real Stallion's gag with her hand: a muscular, but naked male (CFNM) and kneeling beside her.

 

[AwkwardlySet]

Why, I wonder? Perhaps precisely because “professional women” have long exhibited that complicated and uncomfortable “uniform,” which seems made more to satisfy the “visual gaze” of the male (victim or spectator) than to satisfy the lazy selfish indolence of the “Mistress.”

That was my point. Such uncomfortable clothing is mostly for the eyes of the sub, be it male or female, which makes sense only in cases where such clothing is expected from the domme, such as situations where professional dominatrixes indulge in the fantasies of their clients because they are paid to do so. In most other cases in Lit stories, I don't see any sensible reason why a domme in some d/s relationship would wear such an uncomfortable and unpleasant uniform for her own sake and enjoyment only.
I always cringe at such depictions. It also makes the d/s relationship banal, superficial, and predictable. This is fine if the story features a kind of mostly vanilla relationship with some roleplay in it, but that's not the case in most d/s stories as far as I have seen.

 

[John_Vandermeer]

For what it is worth, the latex catsuit clad Dominatrix has always been a turnoff for me. As a CFNM fetishist, a fully clothed Domme is my top choice. But I am much more partial to the fashionable snooty princess next door look! Low rise skinny jeans, four inch stiletto pumps, a slimfit cold shoulder turtleneck top…

 

[Astrotrain]

The outfit is sexy, but I don't know why it's associated with dommes. It's the attitude that makes a domme, not the clothing.

 

[Norway_1705]

The outfit is sexy, but I don't know why it's associated with dommes. It's the attitude that makes a domme, not the clothing.

Yes, I meant to limit it to men in forced chastity.
In BDSM I understand that sometimes, the Dominatrix fulfills specific requests of a male who “plays at being the victim” but in fact, he is the one who asked for handcuffs, an equestrian "riding crop", and for her to wear a provocative outfit.
Seen from a distance, she looks like the Dominant, and he looks like the victim. But I get the impression that if a wife (I know nothing about gay men) if a wife really dominates, she would choose to be comfortable. I don't say jumper and sweater, but a sort of something like that.
That's why the 1861 painting seems to me ... evocative. Latex and heels are demanding, encumbering, and tiring: a Goddess should be free to wear what SHE wants, regardless of her worshipper's silly demands. If she prefers an unbuttoned blouse, he has only to accept and obey.... She have the Absolute Power. Of course, any woman with a drop of malice knows full well that a thong, or bra without cups, will arouse an erection that locked bars will make frustrating... but without her being "forced" to wear a "stage costume" like a specifically paid professional.

 

[Norway_1705]

When I was 18 years old I first saw a BDSM book by John Willie, you know. Sweet Gwendoline (1946!), later taken up by Eric Stanton.
The original author had lived in Singapore and in the Army, so perhaps he had more about Bondage and Shibari than most readers.
But how absurd was the Tortureress's attire?
OK, inflicting pain and discomfort on the victim, Gwendaline, is perfectly obvious and predictable.
But what induced the author to design tight corsets that cinched the waist of the cruel Countess or the stern Agent U-89, and sky-high heels that nailed the calves and toes... tight pants of shiny black leather-why?
Why would a full powerful and unrestrained dominatrix have to put up with all that... hassle?
But more than that: Why should a KEYHOLDER, worshipped as a goddess queen with absolute power, do it? Just to satisfy the eyes of paying readers?
I really believe that a Keyholder should be lazy, comfortable, serene, and unencumbered.
and without chores and errands, of course: including not having the obligation to torture the submissive if SHE is not in the mood. Anyway, he'll get aroused himself (he's a male!) just by seeing a pinky finger.

 

[Rollinbones]

Day 405 of menopause... Licked a stamp. It got wet.

 

[Norway_1705]

Day 405 of menopause... Licked a stamp. It got wet.

I hope you don't mean that all menopausal wives push their husbands toward a Dead Bedroom Marriage.
If that were true, then all those who abandon their wives and get involved with a 25-year-old would be right.
Right?
which, I do not want to believe is universally true (in the sense that Aristotle gave to this).

 

[Norway_1705]

A vintage panel from November of the year... 1970! , designed by illustrator Michael Berry.
The trope, of the husband who is in charge in the Company, but at home is completely subservient to his (much taller, younger and muscular, ergo stronger and “superior”) wife.
Trope in the trope: dominant wife “exhibits” her husband's submission to another woman (women crave for other women's approval? Or is it a form of challenge for supremacy, as in “I got this rare achievement,” perhaps?)
Perhaps Femdom has always existed throughout the ages. Perhaps emperors and kings were manipulated by assertive, authoritarian wives in every century of history.
If it can be said, perhaps the only difference is the production of effective metal devices, which industries only began to disseminate effectively after 2002, never before.

 

[John_Vandermeer]

A vintage panel from November of the year... 1970! , designed by illustrator Michael Berry.
The trope, of the husband who is in charge in the Company, but at home is completely subservient to his (much taller, younger and muscular, ergo stronger and “superior”) wife.
Trope in the trope: dominant wife “exhibits” her husband's submission to another woman (women crave for other women's approval? Or is it a form of challenge for supremacy, as in “I got this rare achievement,” perhaps?)
Perhaps Femdom has always existed throughout the ages. Perhaps emperors and kings were manipulated by assertive, authoritarian wives in every century of history.
If it can be said, perhaps the only difference is the production of effective metal devices, which industries only began to disseminate effectively after 2002, never before.

One shouldn’t assume, but seeing the other woman is older, I can not help think the other woman is mother in law, or maybe even mother. If the former, then female bonding, perhaps including approval, may be part of the appeal. If the latter, then show of force, so as to preempt challenge.

As you have said many times, most devices can be easily defeated. The true domination comes from the fact that they mess with your head. Once caged, male chooses not to defeat cage, showing his true submission.

 

[Norway_1705]

I've been ruminating on this topic for three months.

 

[Astrotrain]

Any interesting conclusions?

 

[Norway_1705]

oh, I don't have any conclusions. I just have a lot of curiosity and a lot of doubts, and I know that I don't know.

About SDBM. Right now, I'm reading a lot of stuff on SDBM. No, that's not a typo: Sad Dead Bedroom Marriages, thousands upon thousands of husbands kept in forced chastity by vanilla wives who reject their husbands' sexual advances every night out of pure laziness, old age, or boredom.

Devoted and faithful husbands, the classic Beta Providers, who work all week to allow their wives to live the lifestyle they want: husbands who spoil and offer all their time and energy to a wife who ignores them.

What is the difference between thousand of always-rejected vanilla husbands and a fictional character wearing for years a chastity cage?


I touched on this topic in a short tale I wrote a few months ago: https://www.literotica.com/s/mom-goes-to-a-lab-meeting-on-island

 

[Norway_1705]

I wonder if the explanation for the current trend for stories about male chastity can be traced back to one of these simple paradigms.
1) It often happens that a man sees an extraordinary woman from afar, but she does not want to marry him.
2) Many young men prefer to remain single rather than be falsely accused of harassment by some follower of Extreme Me Too (a sport excluded from the Olympics, yet).
3) Often a girl expects the boy to pay for everything and then sends him home with blue balls (they say that for this reason, girls save a lot of money while boys never save anything).
4) Often a wife earns more than her husband. In theory, this imbalance might not have any consequences for the couple. Instead, it often has serious consequences.
5) Often a woman is the female boss of a male subordinate employee. This was already happening in films in the 1990s, but it was very rare in real life. Now it happens more and more often. This is partly because girls graduate more easily (schools reject boys, and a boy has to earn money at 18 to pay for dates!). Today it happens much, much more often.
6) Thousands or even millions of couples are made up of a frustrated husband and a nagging and scolding wife who clings to any excuse to establish a SDBM - Sad Dead Bedroom Marriage. What's the difference between that and a Keyholder who yells at you if the floor isn't cleaned to Olympic perfection? In both cases, that woman won't let you cum.

Do you have any other ideas to add?

 

[ChuckWolf]

I had a story where the protagonist politely rebuffs the advances of his advanced physics professor and she punishes him by transporting him (and his girlfriend) into a computer-dimension (like Tron), where he finds himself naked except for the force-field restraints on his wrists and ankles that keep him immobile and spread-eagle.

Even worse are the Chasti-Teasers, vibrating force-field cock-rings and ball-spreader that are constantly coaxing him towards an orgasm, only to prevent it at the last minute - non stop edging, driving the protagonist insane.