Chastity, forced male chastity, and Eroticism.

[RandyRants]

Male chastity is one of my favourite topics, and I have quite a bit of experience with it. It's a delicious form of control and surrender, merciless tease and denial, and, just so you know, an incredibly sexually satisfying endeavor.

I've always, always, been into bondage, ropes, and knots, as a top or bottom (I'm a switch). Discovering chastity was like discovering multi-day bondage instead of just a two hour session.

There is so much to the psychology, physiology, and relationship dynamic to chastity that volumes of stories could be written and never cover it all. I'm working on that! My first polished story will hopefully be published soon (under my new user name Randy Rants once that goes through as well).

You will find that most stories and content around male chastity often include humiliation, feminization, cuckolding, etc., but totally not required to enjoy letting your partner tease you for days, even weeks. The orgasm at the end will either be the most intense orgasm you've ever had, or ruined leaving you horny and frustrated until next time. There's the mystery and anticipation...will I get to come today? Also...the male p-spot orgasm. Indescribable and once you start having those, you may never want a normal orgasm again.

 

[Norway_1705]

Reviews are the hardest thing ever.
They take a lot of time, and the result would either be BORING, or ALL the authors involved or mentioned would feel offended.
For example. I could compile a database and prove that until 1999, stories about forced male chastity only talked about very tight underwear or latex pants without an opening in the front. And that the first chastity cages only appeared after 2001, with a wave of notoriety only after their first appearances on mainstream TV (Californication). But that would be boring! Who cares? I would have to spend months compiling a database that would not help anyone reach orgasm. Or I could list all the stories that associate the presence of a man with a caged penis with a wife who will inevitably seek penetration by another man (the Hotwife theme in Loving Wives).
I could also prove that this stems from the habits of porn film directors, who traditionally ‘have’ to end with a climactic ejaculation: if the husband's penis is locked away, the ejaculation required by the script is missing, and the laziest and most banal solution is to introduce another male actor who ejaculates in the husband's place.
But this would upset the many authors and readers who associate “caged husband” with “insatiable wife,” whereas—statistics don't lie—women on average have much less desire than their husbands and much less frequently over weeks and months, so much so that some wives live happily without sex for months (and years). It's called SDBM - Sad Dead Bedroom Marriage - and it's perpetrated by vanilla women on poor husbands who have been made chaste by scolding and nagging.

 

[Norway_1705]

Male chastity is one of my favourite topics...

Absolutely. I can imagine it somehow affects even female submissives, but in my humble opinion, we males we are wired to "think about eiaculation" 24/7/365, and a chastity device may be super effective.
I don't believe in calendars with pre-dealed dates, because I feel too cocky near it. I mean, if you already know she "Must" release you penis at yout birthday's day, you may be sassy and unrespectful because she "MUST" release. And if you already know there is non hope until 41 days, why act so sweetly? The same about "earn it" after 10 cooked dinners or after 5 female selfish orgasms, as if sex is like a cookie boxes' points collection. Bleah!
If you are curious I published 3 or 4 tales against the calendar and against the "earning", only giving all the ABSOLUTE POWER to the caring and sweet Keyholder. Maybe the more clear about calendar is a Gregory House MD parody, https://www.literotica.com/s/chastity-resort-a-halloween-tale .
IMHO, the best use of "precise dates" is to deny the husband more than ever: giving a new meaning to the loving sign "Do not open until Xmas... and more... yet counting."

 

[Norway_1705]

At the level of historical essay (therefore: BORING), two elements are the most conspicuous, or rather three.
The first is that male chastity devices did not exist until 1999, and the only way to prevent an erection was to insert the penis into very tight leather or latex shorts, sometimes even two or three layers thick.
The second is that the first male chastity devices became widespread after 2001, mainly in Las Vegas and San Francisco: two cities with historically large gay male populations. It is not difficult to imagine that in a gay relationship, the ‘erect’ male and the ‘caged’ male would play two specific roles, one active sadist and one passive masochist. How much of that peculiar dynamic has remained in the imagination of pornographers, both in videos and in stories? A lot, if we consider the frequency with which even WIVES (who should be, by definition, heterosexual females, at least in the statistical majority) eagerly choose to peg their caged husbands, impaling his anus but without feeling any female physical pleasure? Of course, some women may claim that they are intoxicated by the ‘idea of Power’ and the ‘situation of domination’, but anyone who has used a strap-on knows that it requires a lot of physical effort from the woman's hips, in a form of exercise that is quite different from ‘natural’ exercise, and that many women tire after a few seconds (not professionals, who do it as physical exercise without emotion: I'm talking about married wives).
The third is that pornographers have focused for decades on spectacular, eruptive male ejaculation. A ten-minute video could contain a montage of several separate scenes (a blowjob, a footjob, a titjob, anal) but always culminated in an ejaculation with gallons of semen erupting in ropes and ropes of white cream spread over her face and eager breasts (yes, because in order to make the male orgasm VISIBLE, it was necessary for the semen to be “OUTSIDE” the vagina, not inside. Even the camera angle was always such that the penetration could be “SEEN,” whereas when a man and a woman do it IRL, you can't see anything at all). If the husband has his penis locked away, directors and writers don't know how to reproduce the ejaculation TROPE.
So there are only two lazy and banal solutions. Either the wife, in a fit of generosity, frees him to ejaculate (nullifying the whole situation and depriving his sacrifice of meaning), or the wife introduces another man as a BULL of a HOTWIFE in front of a CUCKOLD. This solution is very popular with fans of the “Loving Wives” category, but it always seems implausible in written fiction. In fact, while it is always easy to find a plumber, a postman, a carpenter, a pizza delivery guy, etc. on a video set without any motivation, as usul.
BUT in written fiction, a credible motivation is needed. Instead, in most stories, these Bulls are completely flat and stupid: tall, muscular, handsome, hunged like a giant horse, yet willing to fuck a 50-year-old woman with wrinkles, and what's more, in front of her husband (something that many Bulls would try to avoid out of prudence, just in case) and always ready to have their cocks sucked by him (while many Bulls would be very careful not to tarnish their reputation as womanizers by being seen performing gay acts with men).
And the icing on the cake... Many readers are heterosexual and would only like to read Gentle Femdom stories without sudden gay twists. But instead, I get the impression that many writers are more interested in recounting gay exploits, and use domineering wives only as a pretext to turn husbands into cuckolds, and not just cuckolds, but also gay, sissy, and transsexual.
I understand perfectly well that the Loving Wives category seems to have a larger readership (though still less than “Taboo”), but I don't think it's right to reduce the vast majority of stories about forced male chastity to cucks, gays, and sissies.

Maybe I'm wrong. But I feel that this theme would be much more productive and interesting if more authors focused on the “caged husband and caring wife” dynamic without introducing another man... who serves to show an eruptive ejaculation in videos, but serves little or no purpose in written tales.

 

[Norway_1705]

A friend of mine... yes, that's right... a friend of mine was a male virgin. At 24 years old.
His girlfriend had already had some disappointing experiences with very selfish and unreliable guys: the classic “two pumps and chumps,” and that was it.
That girl took advantage of the power that Mother Nature had wired into his body. The testosterone of a young man who doesn't ejaculate for weeks takes over everything else.
She teased him mercilessly. The two saw each other three times a week, and every time she sent him home with a dramatic case of blue balls. And every time, after kissing him passionately with her tongue, after rubbing her free nipples against his chest, after making him feel how wet her pussy was (spoiler: pussy is always wet, like saliva in your mouth), she dismissed him, ... whispering ".... oh dear.... don't jerk off! Will you be a good boy for me? Promise me you won't play with your little dick by yourself!" And he obeyed, as a good boy does...
Long story short.
How many guys have been dismissed after an expensive date, with blue balls?

What explains this behavior on the part of girlfriends?

And why don't WIVES ever do it (in percentage terms, the majority, don't all answer “my wife does it even after 30 years of marriage,” exceptions don't count)?
I would say that wives are lazy: and that girlfriends NEED to tease and deny, to push that boyfriend to marry them (which is a huge economic mistake) with the promise that AFTER he will have the chance to have sex very often, and that he will be able to empty his blue balls.
But wives reason with the opposite strategy. After the first few years, the wife takes it for granted that her husband will never leave her. With every excuse, the wife begins to reject his advances: both in bed and in choosing things to do (the classic “Which restaurant do you want, dear?” “Oh, it's all the same to me, you choose, husband!” and immediately afterwards she sulks because you didn't “GUESS” the right one. Spoiler: she's lying, it was the right one, but she wants to make you feel like a loser). Children are born, and with the most absurd excuses she rejects your sexual advances, starts walking around the house in a baggy sweatshirt with her hair uncombed, doesn't wear makeup or comb her hair, doesn't wear heels or lingerie. If you touch her, she spanks you. Scolding and nagging for... just everything. This is the path to a SDBM: Sad Dead Bedroom Marriage.
Now I ask you: how many girlfriends have teased you for weeks on end, sending you home with blue balls?
And how many wives have rejected you for months on end, making you sleep on the living room sofa with blue balls?
And why do millions of husbands read the Literotica website with one hand while their wives sleep soundly snoring in their completely unused marital beds?

 

[MillieDynamite]

Actually, male chastity has only been two snips away since ancient Egypt. Though sometimes, they still could become erect, and then when the owner discovered that, well, dead men don't fuck.

At the level of historical essay (therefore: BORING), two elements are the most conspicuous, or rather three.
The first is that male chastity devices did not exist until 1999, and the only way to prevent an erection was to insert the penis into very tight leather or latex shorts, sometimes even two or three layers thick.
The second is that the first male chastity devices became widespread after 2001, mainly in Las Vegas and San Francisco: two cities with historically large gay male populations. It is not difficult to imagine that in a gay relationship, the ‘erect’ male and the ‘caged’ male would play two specific roles, one active sadist and one passive masochist. How much of that peculiar dynamic has remained in the imagination of pornographers, both in videos and in stories? A lot, if we consider the frequency with which even WIVES (who should be, by definition, heterosexual females, at least in the statistical majority) eagerly choose to peg their caged husbands, impaling his anus but without feeling any female physical pleasure? Of course, some women may claim that they are intoxicated by the ‘idea of Power’ and the ‘situation of domination’, but anyone who has used a strap-on knows that it requires a lot of physical effort from the woman's hips, in a form of exercise that is quite different from ‘natural’ exercise, and that many women tire after a few seconds (not professionals, who do it as physical exercise without emotion: I'm talking about married wives).
The third is that pornographers have focused for decades on spectacular, eruptive male ejaculation. A ten-minute video could contain a montage of several separate scenes (a blowjob, a footjob, a titjob, anal) but always culminated in an ejaculation with gallons of semen erupting in ropes and ropes of white cream spread over her face and eager breasts (yes, because in order to make the male orgasm VISIBLE, it was necessary for the semen to be “OUTSIDE” the vagina, not inside. Even the camera angle was always such that the penetration could be “SEEN,” whereas when a man and a woman do it IRL, you can't see anything at all). If the husband has his penis locked away, directors and writers don't know how to reproduce the ejaculation TROPE.
So there are only two lazy and banal solutions. Either the wife, in a fit of generosity, frees him to ejaculate (nullifying the whole situation and depriving his sacrifice of meaning), or the wife introduces another man as a BULL of a HOTWIFE in front of a CUCKOLD. This solution is very popular with fans of the “Loving Wives” category, but it always seems implausible in written fiction. In fact, while it is always easy to find a plumber, a postman, a carpenter, a pizza delivery guy, etc. on a video set without any motivation, as usul.
BUT in written fiction, a credible motivation is needed. Instead, in most stories, these Bulls are completely flat and stupid: tall, muscular, handsome, hunged like a giant horse, yet willing to fuck a 50-year-old woman with wrinkles, and what's more, in front of her husband (something that many Bulls would try to avoid out of prudence, just in case) and always ready to have their cocks sucked by him (while many Bulls would be very careful not to tarnish their reputation as womanizers by being seen performing gay acts with men).
And the icing on the cake... Many readers are heterosexual and would only like to read Gentle Femdom stories without sudden gay twists. But instead, I get the impression that many writers are more interested in recounting gay exploits, and use domineering wives only as a pretext to turn husbands into cuckolds, and not just cuckolds, but also gay, sissy, and transsexual.
I understand perfectly well that the Loving Wives category seems to have a larger readership (though still less than “Taboo”), but I don't think it's right to reduce the vast majority of stories about forced male chastity to cucks, gays, and sissies.

Maybe I'm wrong. But I feel that this theme would be much more productive and interesting if more authors focused on the “caged husband and caring wife” dynamic without introducing another man... who serves to show an eruptive ejaculation in videos, but serves little or no purpose in written tales.

 

[Norway_1705]

only been two snips away since ancient China, indeed.
But - yes I'm boring, yes I'm a teacher, yes I can't speak English - but the root of the whole genre is precisely avoid those two snips.
And yes, I am one of those people who, when asking for the salt, or simply saying “no,” adds the note “No: Hamlet Act 3, Scene 3, Line 87.”
The Keyholder Wife... (1)
Note (1): where by “wife” I mean girlfriend, fiancée, bride-to-be, in short, a female (2) heterosexual emotionally attached (2) to the man who has voluntarily handed over to her the key that decides his erections, giving up both sex and masturbation without her consent...

Note (2) because, as I mentioned earlier, in 1999, chastity cages were used almost exclusively by gay men in BDSM circles in San Francisco and Las Vegas. Probably to emphasize the absence of erection in the male submissive to the dominant male (with an erect penis), or to highlight the “forced feminization” of the caged man. Hence, probably, the continuous and enduring association between chastity cages and sissification, which, in my humble opinion, alienates rather than attracts millions of straight men. “L'histoire n'est pas une bourgeoisie” (Hugo, Les Miserables).
Note (3) and by “emotionally attached” I mean to exclude all those women who “play the part”: actresses, porn stars, OnlyFans content creators who pretend to be interested just because the topic is trendy, and even prostitutes who agree to say and do the extravagant things that a strange client who wants to pay without fucking asks them to do (strange, though, in recent decades we have accepted any sexuality that is alternative to the mainstream, yet everyone is surprised if a man prefers to lick pussy rather than penetrate it).
Where were we? (3) (Note 3: How I Met Your Mother, Season 2, Episode 1, 2006).
Ah, yes. The Keyholder wife doesn't want a castrated husband. Who in the world would want a castrated husband? Sometimes illness or accident renders a man impotent (especially in ancient and medieval times!), but no one “wishes” or “desires” it (and a couple of dozen dystopian writers who talk about gynarchies and superiority stir up unconscious fears, but no one “wants” to castrate the husband they are married to, except on a metaphorical level: in that sense, millions of vanilla wives push their husbands towards mental castration in an SDBM: Sad Dead Bedroom Marriage).
The Keyholder wife wants her husband to be aroused and also denied. She wants him to still be strong, full of testosterone, skilled, and willing... even if “maybe” she won't let him cum today! But the tension must be there.
Stories about male chastity are all about tension. About desire. About a purpose, which is a hope but also a motivation to behave and improve oneself. And, of course, to give orgasms to one's wife: millions of people-pleasers who prefer to give rather than receive. (Note: I've heard this one before).
TLDR: In my opinion, the trend has only just begun, and we will read much more about it in the coming years. The plots will be very diverse because the devices will become increasingly comfortable and hygienic. But above all because the market for straight men is very large.

 

[Norway_1705]

5 stars. I thank DaltonOtt for his wise analysis, and since some readers may be interested in ‘serious’ reflections beyond simply ‘reading with one hand’, here are my two cents.

Keep in mind that I am a history teacher and that English is not my native language.

1): “I really hope my wife reads this”. Come on, guys: why? Why do so many men who write about forced male chastity always hope that, like a message in a bottle, these written words will reach their beloved woman? Read Reddit, advice sites, how-to sites, and you'll find lots of men writing “I hope my wife reads this”.

2) My response to point 1? Men KNOW that their wives will NOT understand. Even men like Dalton, who now has a wife with whom he shares so much, knows that she does NOT understand him. So he pins his hopes on the assumption that his wife will... read this message. 3) Wives don't understand for three main reasons. A) The first is biological: women are made to receive penile penetration. Mother Nature knows best. I know that in America many pretend not to know what a woman is, but the answer is very simple, just ask a biologist. B) The second is psychological: many men feel an urgent need to ejaculate often (every day and even twice or three times a day), while most women feel no need to be penetrated for... days, or even weeks. Women fear “loneliness”, but it is easy to see that if you say “Darling, I'm tired, I'm going to bed” on Tuesday evening, she will not rush to masturbate for four hours while her husband sleeps. c) The third is social.

Culture, films and songs have convinced women that a man will always want to FUCK, and therefore, a husband who announces ‘I give up taking the initiative and will rely on your guidance’ destabilises them - in fact, most wives (on social media and websites) comment ‘I don't want you to burden me with an extra domestic chore’. Incidentally, males in chastity often perform all the chores, as do many vanilla husbands stuck in a dead bedroom marriage. What is this obsession with chores? Considering that we no longer live in the 1800s and that most chores are done by home automation. [footnote: What is this obsession with chores? Considering that we no longer live in the 1800s and that most chores are done by home automation. As for the phrase “a keyholder could obtain anything from that man”, I fear that by now any boring vanilla wife can get anything from any husband, even without the cage.]

What wives often do NOT understand is that teasing is not difficult. Dalton, here, confesses that he gets erections just by watching his wife brush her teeth, sweaty from the gym, and that's 100% true, because we are cavemen like Neanderthals and we get turned on by tiny, primal details. Women think it would be necessary to “get ready”: women who put on lipstick to go grocery shopping imagine that to be a Keyholder they should wear latex trousers and thigh-high leather stiletto boots (and special makeup, and a special hairstyle with a ponytail, and special nail polish, etc.: because women think that way). Nothing could be more wrong: a man in chastity gets aroused just by seeing a bare little finger sticking out from under his pyjamas.

Dalton wrote admirably that sex without devotion does not give the same pleasure as having sex with the woman you love, knowing that she loves you sincerely. I imagine that the deduction to be drawn from this syllogism is that we are not attracted to chastity, but to the daydream of meeting a woman so deeply in love with us that she is a sweet but strict Keyholder. Upsetting everything (biology, psychology and culture) just to be able to love us.

And, yes, I also agree that every man's dream is to find a woman who loves him so much that SHE MAKES HIM A BETTER MAN. Just in our imagination, of course, as in a literary site…

 

[Gamblnluck]

As a reader, my problem is the way male chastity is often presented in the stories. Often the man has a tiny cock and the wife or GF decides to lock the tiny thing away. The fallacy is. if it is so small that it is useless, why bother? She is often going to go fuck other better endowed men anyway.
If it is a matter of control, then work on that story line. A chronic masturbater will be just as frustrated after two days as two weeks. As a matter of fact, more so.

Look at guys in the Army or other services who spent time in communal situations like basic training. Especially in the past, there was no privacy. Guys who'd beat their meat often could not do it. (Hell toilets were in the open.) Then NOT being able to cum became normal. Balls didn't swell up and threaten to explode, etc.
Even if the cock was fairly restricted for a short time, it would adapt. It wouldn't drop a man to his knees in agony.

If you want to write a story about the man's sex life being controlled, fine. Do it. Make it feel logical. There is SO much room for the story to go then. AND the reader will identify even more.

 

[Norway_1705]

Personally, I can't stand writers who create male characters with small penises, precisely for the reason you mention.
In my opinion, if there is any pride on the part of the wife in keeping a penis under lock and key, it is precisely because she knows that if it were free, it would be proud, strong, and domineering.
I can't help but remember that, in the beginning, chastity cages were only used in gay circles, with the idea of a “free” male being perceived as superior to the submissive male. I have no objection to that, of course, but it's not my cup of tea.

 

[Norway_1705]

Has there ever been a woman who chose a weak man? I'm not saying that he became weak after his injuries or mutilations: it's clear that Admiral Nelson's wife loved him both before and after he lost an eye.
But what woman would choose to marry a micro-endowed man and then lock him up? This is clearly a projection of male desires. I wonder if some authors insist so much on the protagonist with an undeveloped penis in order to perceive themselves as the son of a mother who forbids him to masturbate (and this too would be an important but different literary theme).

 

[Norway_1705]

Some key points that separate real life from pornographic fantasies.
1) Many women (maybe 30%?) do NOT orgasm with vaginal penetration; check any scientific journal. They “conceive children” that way, but they do not orgasm.
2) Many men (maybe 60%?) ejaculate BEFORE their wives reach orgasm. This is “premature” in the literal sense. It doesn't matter if you lasted 3 seconds or 3 minutes if she needed another 5 minutes.
3) Many men ENJOY seeing their wives orgasm. It's a powerful feeling, even if you didn't use your penis but only your hands, mouth, or a sex toy.
4) Sales of chastity cages are on the rise. It's not possible that only gay men are buying them. They must also be bought by straight couples. And it's not credible that they are all obsessed with the “Hotwife+Cuckold+Bull” paradigm, also because if your wife wants to have an affair, it's easier to slip away secretly when you're at the office: while the cage forces her to be too honest. Women are born for secretive and suggestive things (they are perfect at this!), blunt sincerity is just an ideal of male writers.
Erotic Literacy may offer something to gentle, caring, faithful, straight couples exploring this kink.

 

[Astrotrain]

Personally, I can't stand writers who create male characters with small penises, precisely for the reason you mention.

Well small penis humiliation is a kink as well, and I guess some male subs have both and put them in their stories. I never really cared for SPH but lately I've kind of gotten into the gentle femdom version which I think I've heard called small penis adoration. Regular SPH would be "Look at that pathetic little thing! You're not even a real man! Do you really think you could satisfy a woman with that tiny little dicklet?" while SPA would be more like "Awww, look at that little thing! It's absolutely adorable! Look at it standing up erect like that, it's like a little puppy barking at the mailman not realizing how tiny and precious it really is! It's so cute I want to tie a little pink bow around it and sprinkle it with glitter!"