can anyone help me find any help on transgender stuff

[flnorg]

can anyone help me find any help on transgender information

hello everybody um i normally do not post because i do not trust most people. i have been questing my sexuality for some time now. i was wondering if i could talk to some people about this. sorry for any spelling errors because i suck at spelling. and contact me if you want.

 

[Etoile]

hello everybody um i normally do not post because i do not trust most people. i have been questing my sexuality for some time now. i was wondering if i could talk to some people about this. sorry for any spelling errors because i suck at spelling. and contact me if you want.

Hi there, we are here to help. You mention that you're questioning your sexuality but you say you're looking for help on transgender stuff. Sexuality means who you are interested in - same sex/opposite sex - and transgender means changing your own gender. Are you confused about both, or just about changing your gender?

Feel free to ask any questions you like, you're anonymous here and this is a safe place to ask questions.

 

[Tymeless]

Like i told you on MSN this place has a lot of good helpful people here don't be afraid to speak up or talk to them. We are all in the same boat together and like she said your anonymous here right now.

 

[flnorg]

I am confused about both.

 

[emap]

fl don't worry, most of us won't call you names or anything, the ones who will are not in this section anyway.

Probably would be best to straighten out who you are attracted to before figuring out if you are actually a woman or a man, what you have between your legs not always being a good indicator. So in semi keeping with that, who are you attracted to? Celebrities and well people you see everyday, both if you happen to live in a nice section of Los Angeles.

Now keep in mind, looking at a guy and going I would so fuck him doesn't mean your gay, or bi well OK it does kinda mean your bi, but it mostly just means your alive. On the other hand, if you only see a couple women you would want to have in bed with you and alot of guys that kinda says your gay, or at least bi strongly attracted to men and rather picky on women.

Now moving on to the other side of your questioning. Liking to wear frilly panties doesn't mean much besides you have good taste in underwear. Wanting to dress up in a full dress, with bra and panties and fake breasts does mean you are a transgender, just means you like to be feminine sometimes. Just because you like to wear feminine things doesn't have to mean you are a woman trapped in a man's body. Heck when I was growing up, still do even I wore pants alot, don't always wear a dress, and spiked heels are not a normal footwear for me, I do dress up for my guy though mostly he likes me to dress down.

What you like to wear is not indicative of an underlying desire to be the opposite sex, sometimes it means you have brains and will wear what is best for your activities or you just like to be pretty.

You know I really hope I did not offend, or scare you off. I'm not an expert, your talking to one already. I just wanted to come in and show that I at least won't judge and will help in any way possible. Etoile won't either, and if I or anyone else gets really dumb she will come along and bitch slap them for ya.

 

[flnorg]

I am attracted to guys for the most part every so often there is a girl that will sweep me off my feet but that does not happen much. and as far ass the other thing goes um i always liked dressing up i get really excited and feel really good and sexy. um i really do not know what to say now so yeah.

 

[flnorg]

i realized i just said ass in the post just before this one i meant to say as sorry.

 

[emap]

Oh hun don't worry about that, there is an edit button at the end of every post you have made in the forums, just in case you made a booboo or want to change it for some other reason.

Though it made me giggle, especially when I read your second post talking about it. Ashamed to say I mostly just translated it when I read it the first time.

Anyway, about the liking mostly guys, hun you are either gay, or bi with strong same sex tendencies. Nothing wrong with it, personally I like both, men more than though there are some women I would so go lesbian for. Jessica Alba, though of course who wouldn't. Not to mention Etoile, she is just so sexy hot.

Psshhhttt, don't say anything, I'm trying to see if she is paying attention.

Now as for clothes, honestly you sound more like you enjoy the feel of silk and satin and frilly things than being a woman in a man's body. Of course to really tell I bet we would have to delve alot deeper. To do that we either need to find a pshrink or get Tymeless back in here.

 

[Etoile]

Ha! I read the thread, hopped in the shower, came out, and hit Post Reply. I thought "I should see if anybody else has replied first" so I check and sure enough, emap was there with a lovely compliment for me! http://www.amanita.net/images/smilies/blush.gif

flnorg, I agree with what emap said. You've only told us a little tiny bit, but it sounds like you prefer guys and you like dressing up in women's clothing. Absolutely nothing wrong with that! In fact my best friend is a gay guy who likes to wear panties and the occasional skirt.

If you want to give us a little bit more info, we might be able to help out a little better.

 

[emap]

I am good at that sometimes.

I'm not so sure you prefer dressing up in womens clothing so much as you have a really good fashion sense.

Seriously, most of the guy clothes are just so bleh, I enjoy a nice suit, love a hunky guy in uniform, and I adore mine in a t-shirt and shorts, easier to get him out of those.

Though OK funny thing, we get playboy, free subscription for ordering porn, or was it a replacement bullet, I forget now, anyway we got a free subscription to Playboy, it is an interesting read don't look at me like that.

They have a fashion pictorial sort of thing every couple of months, love the dresses they pick out, though the guy clothes are just well, feminine. Or well shoddy makes alot of appearances to, you know the suits with an unbottoned jacket hanging off the shoulders a tie that isn't tied worth a crap and a shirt pulled up so it is poofy and unbottoned here and there. So looks like the guy slept in a crashing train and then gets up to go sit with a model. Ascots are making a come back according to Playboy.

I did have a point I swear, or did it sorta creep in there? Anyway, I think a guy wanting to wear women's clothes is a great thing, shows a good fashion sense instead of the whole tossing on a torn shirt and pants thingy. Not that it is a bad thing mind, well sometimes not, but when we go out, I make him wear a nice shirt, when we get home I take it off him carefully then he almost tears my dress off.

Not complaining.

Oh, I got a question too, why do you like wearing women's clothes? That actually is something of the heart of the matter.

Oh and Tymeless get your behind back in here, Etoile and I were both born women, you weren't so your more of an expert on this than either of us.

 

[flnorg]

ever since i was a little one i liked dressing up. my first memory was when i was five and i first dressed up i loved it. i still love dressing up. i really do not know why i like it i just do. it is really hard to explain why i like it. it frustrates me on why i can't explain it.

 

[Dumpling]

ever since i was a little one i liked dressing up. my first memory was when i was five and i first dressed up i loved it. i still love dressing up. i really do not know why i like it i just do. it is really hard to explain why i like it. it frustrates me on why i can't explain it.

http://forum.literotica.com/showthread.php?p=25095507#post25095507
try this

 

[emap]

Talk to some of the people in the link she gives, at least one is a crossdresser and hopefully can help you figure it out.

As for what I think, so far as I can tell you like looking that way but it has nothing to do with your sexuality. There are straight crossdressers and drag queens after all.

If at all possible, you really should find a sex therapist and talk to him/her about all this. Since none of us have the training we can't do anything beyond guess and this is a teensy too important to just go with guesses.

 

[flnorg]

well i now have a therapist which is helping me out a lot now.

 

[Tymeless]

awesome therapy is nice but it isn't the end all of end alls.

If there is anything I can help you with just let me know

 

[Etoile]

Therapy is not the end...but it is the beginning.

 

[Nimbikarana]

flnorg may what you seek be found by you

 

[stlpenguin]

Yeah, I'm going through a little bit of this now, too, which is what brings me back to the forums after all this time.

Some of you may remember me as a straight (kinda bi) crossdresser. I've posted some pics and some stories about my Domme and I. My alter-ego is Sara.

Just last night, I had a long heart-to-heart with my wife and my Domme about my crossdressing, what it means, and what it's leading to. The more I let Sara out of the closet, the more she grows into her own woman. My fantasies have never been about wearing something silky - though that certainly is pleasant - nor is it just slipping on a pair of panties and getting off. My interests as a crossdresser have been about 'passing'. I wanted to be a woman in the eyes of others. I wanted to be pretty. I wanted to be able to be soft and gentle. I didn't want to be feared by other women because I have a penis. I didn't want to be on the team that had all the beer-swilling, football-watching, cat-calling testosterone junkies on it anymore.

So I crossdress to get away from all of that. I let Sara out for a bit, and I feel like a woman, and it's LIBERATING. But as I was out shopping with Ma'am the other day at a great little 2nd Hand store down the block from Her place, I came to a realization - I'll never be a woman.

It was a scary thought. I mean, I'd had thoughts like this before, and I've given a lot of consideration to why I do things, and why I crossdress, and why I feel the way I do about various things, but this one... this one seemed to take purchase and grow roots in my head, and before I knew it, this thought wasn't a speck, but a small oak tree. It needed to be addressed.

All of the thoughts I'd had on the matter seemed to mix all together, and I came to the conclusion that there were only three possible outcomes for all of this:

1) I have boy bits. Get over it, quit fooling myself, quit playing make-believe at being a girl. It's not real, I should just be happy being a boy. I don't see this as an attractive option, as it largely involves lying to my insides because they don't match my outside. This does not address the issue at all, but is the least socially impacting of my options. It will, however, drive me insane.

2) I can continue crossdressing. Sometimes I'll be Scott. Somtimes I'll be Sara. I'll continue with the fake boobs and clothes that don't quite fit the way I'd like them to. Continue to deal with the fact that I am straight on the sides instead of curvey, and this makes me look funny in girl clothes. Continue to deal with the makeup and beard shadow and going through razors like they're cough drops to keep my body shaved... and never truly be a member of either gender community. This is an unattractive option to me because I feel lonely in my gender. I feel utterly lost and alone in a room full of men, but I cannot gain access to being female either - I simply don't have the credentials. Being a crossdresser just enforces floating in the middle, rather than getting a membership card for either side.

3) I could say "Fuck it" and go the whole hog, and apply for SRS (Sexual Reassignment Surgery). I could go through all the therapy, hormones, and coaching classes of how to act and speak feminine. I could stand to lose my family, friends, job, and maybe even my wife, all so I can be happy with who I am. Even if I go through all the SRS, which, as I'm sure Tymeless can tell you, is not an easy process both physically and emotionally, there's no guarantee I'll be 'passable'. I'll have thrown it all away to turn myself into a noticeable tranny that will evoke sneers and jeers from passers-by for the rest of my life. It would be like I was in high school, only instead of walking down the hall and getting "hehe, here comes the nerd!" it'll be "hehe here comes the tranny!" But.... I'd be a girl like I want.

I guess I'm only saying this for two reasons : it helps me vent in a forum full of people fully qualified to talk about this (such as Tymeless, who's not only an absolute sweetheart, but knowledgeable on the subject matter), and it hopefully helps you, Flnorg, acknowledge that you're not alone out there. You're not a freak. There are others like you, and we know how you feel.

I'm looking for dialog on my above-posted conundrum. Perhaps we can work out our problems together, Flnorg, and find the answers we're looking for... or, in lieu of answers, maybe it's just enough to know that we're both confused people, and we can be confused together, so we won't feel so alone and in the dark.

-- Scott / Sara

 

[tommynova2001]

Hi there, we are here to help. You mention that you're questioning your sexuality but you say you're looking for help on transgender stuff. Sexuality means who you are interested in - same sex/opposite sex - and transgender means changing your own gender. Are you confused about both, or just about changing your gender?

Feel free to ask any questions you like, you're anonymous here and this is a safe place to ask questions.

That was my first thought

I am confused about both.

This is also common. Both because there is no reason why a person with transgendered issue can't have the same rough percentage likelihood of having same sex feelings and because the stereotypes that exist about the transgendered (and yes even here in this forum) suggests there is something 'gay' about dressing.

Look at the subtext for the name of the GBLT forum it says "Discussion of non-straight sexuality and life."..I don;t take it personally, but I'm not going to change my sexual orientation to fit in.. Accurately it should say queer sexuality but even that doesn't cover it because people assume Queer - Gay.

I will always think fondly of literotica as the place I happened to be reading on when the epiphany hit me that my seemingly random occurrences of dressing up over many decades were part of a pattern and that I had transgendered feelings. I will say though that this place is far far from the best resource for learning about transgendered issues. Our GLB brothers and sisters so called do make an effort to be inclusive, but I find them just as likely to have wrong perceptions as the general population. Just in the thread on lesbians above someone claims to be able to tell a gay man from the way he talks. Some gay men have effeminate traits or affect such culturally but they may or may not have transgendered feelings. Its complicated to explain to anyone that doesn't experience it, mostly because its complicated to arrive at how you actually feel inside apart from how society has imprinted on you what gender roles should be.