Bringing Up STD Testing

[center_stage]

My boyfriend and I have finally reached the point in our relationship where we would like to sleep with each other.

Before we do so, I would like to get an STD test just to be safe. I always used condoms with my ex, but once I found out that he cheated on me, I got nervous and scheduled an STD test for myself to be safe. My test is in two weeks (Planned Parenthood offers them every once in a while, and they get full fast, therefore this was the earliest I could get).

I would like to bring up STD testing to my boyfriend, but I am a bit worried that he will think I don't trust him. I do believe that I am the only one he has been with for the past two months, but recently I have some suspicions that he was with another woman before we were "official."

How do I bring up STD testing without offending him or making things awkward between us. I am usually not this reserved about issues like this, I normally would just blurt it out, but I don't want to lose this guy because I like him a lot. Any suggestions?

 

[SweetErika]

If he cares about you at all, he'll be more than happy to get tested (but remember HIV can take 6 months to show up, tests often don't include HSV and men aren't tested for HPV, so you still need condoms). "I'm getting tested for everything in two weeks, and I'd like you to do the same before we have sex," should work just fine. If he has a problem with that or you can't communicate this, don't have sex, plain and simple.

 

[tanyachrs]

You should use condoms at the start whether he's been tested or not. Somewhere down the road when he whines about using condoms, tell him you'll consider stopping if he gets a test. If you would consider it, that is. I know some people would use a condom regardless but if I'm at the point where I trust someone's future behavior and have learned their past and have been with them for a while and am on a better form of birth control anyway, I, personally, am willing to quit at that point. Your mileage may vary.

 

[bgr]

Just ask him to do so. If he is sincere he will understand and be thankful for the honesty. If he gets upset and leaves the relationship wasn't going to go anywhere.

 

[Dirtco]

Testing

I would for sure ask him to be tested if you are willing to sleep with him love and respect yourself enough to look out for your self. If he turns a blind eye good riddence..........

 

[curvacious]

if he's not mature enough to handle you asking him if he will also get tested then he's not mature enough to be having sex. congrats on getting tested----scary how many people don't or think that if there's no symptoms that everythings fine.

 

[helix27]

Just ask him to do so. If he is sincere he will understand and be thankful for the honesty. If he gets upset and leaves the relationship wasn't going to go anywhere.

I agree.

 

[center_stage]

You should use condoms at the start whether he's been tested or not

Trust me, I would use condoms no matter what. I am currently on BC but I still use condoms no matter what the situation.

Just ask him to do so. If he is sincere he will understand and be thankful for the honesty. If he gets upset and leaves the relationship wasn't going to go anywhere.

If he doesn't get tested for STD's I am definitely not sleeping with him. I hope that he does not get upset because I am not quite sure what there is to get upset about when it comes to safety. I just worry that he will get upset because he will feel that I don't trust him. I'm just doing it because an STD is the last thing I need. Thanks for the advice.

 

[JessieSexpot]

Good for you to stand up for yourself. If only more women were smart like this. We have to protect ourself.

 

[deliciously_naughty]

I just said to my husband that I wanted us both to get tested considering neither of us had a single digit sexual past. He whole-heartedly agreed. We both got tested and then proceeded to fuck like bunnies.

 

[center_stage]

I just said to my husband that I wanted us both to get tested considering neither of us had a single digit sexual past. He whole-heartedly agreed. We both got tested and then proceeded to fuck like bunnies.

Sounds like fun

 

[ammre]

If he cares about you at all, he'll be more than happy to get tested (but remember HIV can take 6 months to show up, tests often don't include HSV and men aren't tested for HPV, so you still need condoms). "I'm getting tested for everything in two weeks, and I'd like you to do the same before we have sex," should work just fine. If he has a problem with that or you can't communicate this, don't have sex, plain and simple.

HPV and HSV can both be transmitted arround a condom.

 

[deliciously_naughty]

Sounds like fun

Grin...it still is 2 years later

 

[KokopelliRises]

If you can't be completely honest and straightforward with each, I'd reconsider the whole sex thing, maybe scale it down a notch until you both are tested or can talk candidly about your past sexual relationships and the possibility of infection.

No matter what kind of rap condoms get, other than complete abstinence (not fun really), they are the best method of preventing the transmission of STIs and STDs.