Boredom

[Shadowsdream]

Foolish games in submission bring Me boredom. Boredom entices My lack of interest. Lack of interest earns my disregard. Disregard causes Me to look past you. Looking past you brings My vision to others. Bringing My vision to others opens doors to one who may not play games. That one may find him/herself in heaven. Which could leave you in the hell of loneliness once again.
My silence is the sound you should listen for. It is louder than any word I may speak for your comfort or humiliation.

How do you as a submissíve or a Dominant react to boredom when your intellect is continually fed bullshit?

 

[A Desert Rose]

Foolish games in submission bring Me boredom. Boredom entices My lack of interest. Lack of interest earns my disregard.

My silence is the sound you should listen for. It is louder than any word I may speak for your comfort or humiliation.

OH my Ma'am....... so much said in so few words. I will digest this and maybe have more to say at a later date. Games, disregard, silence...... Words that mean much to me.

Rose

 

[lovetoread]

Honestly?

I react badly. I cant seem to be able to set the emotions aside and keep going. When he does some things,I have a hard time keeping my anger in check.

I just think that with all the hell I went through to get here,how dare you treat me this way.

But rarely do my real thoughts come out. I dont think he even realizes what he is doing most of the time.

He's used to things like this.

I am not.

I was in a nilla marriage for 13 years. We may not have done the things I wanted to do,but he didnt play mind games with me either.

 

[Ebonyfire]

How do you as a submissíve or a Dominant react to boredom when your intellect is continually fed bullshit?

At first I may try to see if I am being unfair. After a bit, I hit ignore. I call it swatting flies.

Eb

 

[WillowPuss]

Foolish games in submission bring Me boredom. Boredom entices My lack of interest. Lack of interest earns my disregard. Disregard causes Me to look past you. Looking past you brings My vision to others. Bringing My vision to others opens doors to one who may not play games. That one may find him/herself in heaven. Which could leave you in the hell of loneliness once again.
My silence is the sound you should listen for. It is louder than any word I may speak for your comfort or humiliation.

How do you as a submissíve or a Dominant react to boredom when your intellect is continually fed bullshit?

If all my attempts and regaining interest have fallen on stony ground, I withdraw into myself.
I try and find other things to occupy my time. Tp keep my hands and my mind busy from dying a slow death ... because, to me, that is what boredom must be. Like a living death.

 

[Desdemona]

In all honesty, I have neither the time nor the interest in dealing with bullshit. I would not waste my time on that sort of game. Accordingly, I try very hard not to waste anyone else's time with games.

For me, bullshit indicates a massive lack of respect; it doesn't matter whether the individual is labeled Dom/me, sub, or switch.

I have heard the profound sound of silence. For me, it was worse than any other punishment that could have been delivered.


edited for a typo

 

[Ebonyfire]

I have heard the profound sound of silence. For me, it was worse than any other punishment that could have been delivered.

It is the only punishment that worked with my daughter. Silence and isolation. "Go to your room", was like a slap in the face to her.

Eb

 

[A Desert Rose]

R-E-S-P-E-C-T

I try very hard to ignore bullshit. If I am being fed it, I try to look for the reason why he would be doing that. Anyone who knows me for any length of time knows, that I cut through the bullshit. So I would have to wonder why someone would be feeding it to me.

I expect people (in a relationship especially) to treat me as I treat them. That means with: honesty, affection, concern..... you know all the nice stuff. Games annoy me. I will lose interest quickly because game playing is indicative of a lack of honesy and a lack of respect for me.

There is the core for me- RESPECT. If this is as much respect for me as someone has, to play games and feed me crap, that person does not deserve my presence.

Make sense? I wrote in a hurry, hope it does.

Rose

 

[Desdemona]

It is the only punishment that worked with my daughter. Silence and isolation. "Go to your room", was like a slap in the face to her.

Eb

I don't know about your daughter, but I would go to great lengths to avoid this punishment again.

 

[A Desert Rose]

Am I your evil twin?

I just read your post, Des. How do we do that? Say nearly the same things soooo often. You're scarin' me pal. I hear the Twilight Zone theme now, every time I see you.......

Rose

 

[WillowPuss]

I am very much the same as des and Rose ... but I tend to give people second and third chances.
After that though ... no way.


If ever I recieved that from Robuck I would be devastated. I would examine myself very closely to see where I may be in error and seek to rectify that.


Being ignore, blanked, to me is the worst thing imaginable.

 

[Ebonyfire]

I don't know about your daughter, but I would go to great lengths to avoid this punishment again.

That is exactly what would happen. She was the least punished child in her circle of friends. To this day, if she thinks I am ignoring her, she gets really upset.

Eb

 

[Desdemona]

That is exactly what would happen. She was the least punished child in her circle of friends. To this day, if she thinks I am ignoring her, she gets really upset.

Eb

I am the same way. But, in a D/s relationship, I have to struggle not to panic and to avoid assuming I'm being ignored. It is very hard.

Rose, we scare each other every day, pal.
Willow, I know exactly what you mean.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Honestly?

I react badly. I cant seem to be able to set the emotions aside and keep going. When he does some things,I have a hard time keeping my anger in check.

I just think that with all the hell I went through to get here,how dare you treat me this way.

But rarely do my real thoughts come out. I dont think he even realizes what he is doing most of the time.

He's used to things like this.

I am not.

I was in a nilla marriage for 13 years. We may not have done the things I wanted to do,but he didnt play mind games with me either.

Do you think you should set the emotions aside? If you sensed boredom tin the Dom would you question your part in the boredom?

Boredom is an insiduous killer of emotions don't you think?

I always enjoy your additions to the conversations.

 

[Ebonyfire]

I am the same way. But, in a D/s relationship, I have to struggle not to panic and to avoid assuming I'm being ignored.

I think it is true for any relationship. Especially if you are out in the world, where so many times we are invisible to many people. They do not "see"us, we do not matter.

A relationship may the the only place where we are "seen" or "seem to matter". If we are ignored there isn't that the ultimate insult?

Eb

 

[Hecate]

Boredom - something I detest with a vengeance

Boredom is a killer!

A killer not only for the BDSM relation but in my opinion in all inter-human contacts.

Boredom leaves us dull, and that leaves us falling back into a "no more effort" mode - deadly for any relation but so much more a BDSM one.

Boredom is the opposite of challenge (allow that artistic freedom here), and if you are no longer challenged how can you grow? And when growth stops, what else is there but standstill at the best, detirioration more likely?

Boredom makes a fun bit into duty - and duty is usually no fun ... and no fun is something I don't like doing - and what I don't like doing ... I won't if I can avoid it. And I can avoid boring subs and boring relations - and I will!

Looking at it from a different angle: it would be unfair towards my sub if I were bored, turned dull, even annoyed and therefore couldn't dedicate the witt and spirit my sub deserves to further her growth.

So for me - in as many parts of my life as possible - boredom is to be avoided at all times - simply because it makes me loose that precious stimulation of being ALIVE!

 

[Ebonyfire]

Re: Boredom - something I detest with a vengeance

Boredom is a killer!

A killer not only for the BDSM relation but in my opinion in all inter-human contacts.

Boredom leaves us dull, and that leaves us falling back into a "no more effort" mode - deadly for any relation but so much more a BDSM one.

Boredom is the opposite of challenge (allow that artistic freedom here), and if you are no longer challenged how can you grow? And when growth stops, what else is there but standstill at the best, detirioration more likely?

Boredom makes a fun bit into duty - and duty is usually no fun ... and no fun is something I don't like doing - and what I don't like doing ... I won't if I can avoid it. And I can avoid boring subs and boring relations - and I will!

Looking at it from a different angle: it would be unfair towards my sub if I were bored, turned dull, even annoyed and therefore couldn't dedicate the witt and spirit my sub deserves to further her growth.

So for me - in as many parts of my life as possible - boredom is to be avoided at all times - simply because it makes me loose that precious stimulation of being ALIVE!

\

Well put!

Eb

 

[Rubyfruit]

Foolish games in submission bring Me boredom. Boredom entices My lack of interest. Lack of interest earns my disregard. Disregard causes Me to look past you. Looking past you brings My vision to others. Bringing My vision to others opens doors to one who may not play games. That one may find him/herself in heaven. Which could leave you in the hell of loneliness once again.
My silence is the sound you should listen for. It is louder than any word I may speak for your comfort or humiliation.

I don't think I have ever seen so much communicated in so few words before.

I really enjoy your posts, Shadows. Thank you.

I believe I have an acutely sensitive bullshit meter. I can feel it when somebody is being less-than-honest with me, and I have no tolerance for it.

I am real in my personal interactions with friends, lovers and family and I expect the same in return.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Re: R-E-S-P-E-C-T

I try very hard to ignore bullshit. If I am being fed it, I try to look for the reason why he would be doing that. Anyone who knows me for any length of time knows, that I cut through the bullshit. So I would have to wonder why someone would be feeding it to me.

I expect people (in a relationship especially) to treat me as I treat them. That means with: honesty, affection, concern..... you know all the nice stuff. Games annoy me. I will lose interest quickly because game playing is indicative of a lack of honesy and a lack of respect for me.

There is the core for me- RESPECT. If this is as much respect for me as someone has, to play games and feed me crap, that person does not deserve my presence.

Make sense? I wrote in a hurry, hope it does.

Rose

It makes perfect sense for if there is no RESPECT you can bet your butt there will be a full load of bullshit smelling up the yard.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Re: Boredom - something I detest with a vengeance

Boredom is a killer!

A killer not only for the BDSM relation but in my opinion in all inter-human contacts.

Boredom leaves us dull, and that leaves us falling back into a "no more effort" mode - deadly for any relation but so much more a BDSM one.

Boredom is the opposite of challenge (allow that artistic freedom here), and if you are no longer challenged how can you grow? And when growth stops, what else is there but standstill at the best, detirioration more likely?

Boredom makes a fun bit into duty - and duty is usually no fun ... and no fun is something I don't like doing - and what I don't like doing ... I won't if I can avoid it. And I can avoid boring subs and boring relations - and I will!

Looking at it from a different angle: it would be unfair towards my sub if I were bored, turned dull, even annoyed and therefore couldn't dedicate the witt and spirit my sub deserves to further her growth.

So for me - in as many parts of my life as possible - boredom is to be avoided at all times - simply because it makes me loose that precious stimulation of being ALIVE!

Welcome to the conversation...I have been waiting for you!

I must totally agree that boredom also removes the fun from BDSM, the stimulation and the joy...tinge that with anger and annoyance and You cannot escape self defeat in continuing to pretend there is a BDSM relationship still going on.

 

[Shadowsdream]

Re: Re: Boredom

I don't think I have ever seen so much communicated in so few words before.

I really enjoy your posts, Shadows. Thank you.

I believe I have an acutely sensitive bullshit meter. I can feel it when somebody is being less-than-honest with me, and I have no tolerance for it.

I am real in my personal interactions with friends, lovers and family and I expect the same in return.

How wonderful that you have come to add your voice to O/our conversation. I am pleased that you are finding value in these discussions and hope that you will feel comfortable to hang out and enjoy.

Bullshit certainly is the destruction of reality.

 

[SexyChele]

I might react differently, depending on the person involved and the relationship expectation.

If the relationship is more casual, then I will probably return the game-playing until I tire of it all and leave. (Usually lasts no longer than a week)

If the relationship is something I feel strongly about, I would question why the games. I would be more likely to see if something is going on and see if the relationship might still work.

If a Dom bores me? The relationship is over.

 

[Shadowsdream]

you wanted to run from yourself but you were held trapped, mesmerized with Her indifference. Once again you tried to trick Her into Domming you online. Her response was quick and lethal as She told you of all the sex chat locations online. She wished you luck in your search for the 3rd time. you sensed Her boredom and bid Her a hasty good-bye.
you sat stunned in the early morning. Amazed at the time that had slipped by so quickly and the emotions that drove you from confusion to desire. Only your willpower kept you from reconnecting to see if She was still online. Could those really be your own hands that shook half in fear and half in anticipation? Did you really feel the NEED to drop to your knees to dream? Could a man of such every day strength be reduced to this scrap of humanity that sought nothing but Her approval? Could you be so hard that you think you will explode without more than the thought of Her watching you entertain Her with your slutty behavior for no other reason than Her amusement? Even closing your eyes will not shake Her from your mind. you begin to doubt Her reality for it is the only way you can hold onto your sanity. Even the bite of a cold shower does nothing to soothe your ardor. your mind constantly returns to the desire to run like a fool to the keyboard of hope.
you can't resist! But your hopes are dashed when you find Her gone. Like a balloon popped by the careless brush of a burning cigarette tip you feel the deflation of your energy. Depression fills the pit of your stomach as you wonder if you caused offense with your stupidity. She has left you much to think about even though Her Domination was Her natural way. She could not be drawn into your games and this single fact made Her stand out like the beacon you had been searching for. you knew that you would have to conform to Her high standards to get Her respect. It became the only thought your mind could digest. The day was spent in listless wanderings throughout the tasks you must complete. Each hour became an endurance test to your patience. All speed records were made to return home as you feared She would not be online.
But She was! you couldn't believe how your heart pounded with relief. you knew this time you better think before you spoke.
Such relief when Her response was cordial and accepting of your new demeanor.
She taught you pride with only a few strokes of Her keyboard as She gently showed you the reality of Her world. Only reality could touch this Domme and the miles that separated Her Domination from your submission seemed to evaporate. Not once would She bend Her standards to fit another, which gave you the courage to show your own NEED. No longer could you hide from yourself. She showed you empathy and compassion. A new peace and contentment settled over you that nothing had prepared you for. Such a calmness as only true acceptance could bring. No more games could be played, for reality was so much more than fantasy could dream of. She soothed with the information that you never knew existed. She taught you about patience that should replace desperation. Showed you that submission was a journey to be slowly taken. Encouraged you to grow emotionally with Her pride in your new found respect for yourself. Her brand of Domination did not need commands or whips to keep you craving your place at Her feet. you knew without even meeting that She had the strength and Power to provide an umbrella of safety. Now the only question that would haunt you was.....would you ever be Hers?

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I think this passage illustrates that second chances can occur, lessons can be learned, LDR is no excuse for testing nor obligation. There is much to lose in stupidity and much to gain in honesty...


any comments?

 

[A Desert Rose]

Good morning, Ma'am and yes, I soon will have something to write here. This is an excellent passage.

Rose

 

[A Desert Rose]

I think this passage illustrates that second chances can occur, lessons can be learned, LDR is no excuse for testing nor obligation. There is much to lose in stupidity and much to gain in honesty...

Can you see that there are circumstances where all can be lost by honesty? And sometimes there are no second chances?

Is it ALWAYS best to be honest? Are there times when one should hold back?

I have tested myself regarding my honesty. Now I am questioning how wise I was to be so honest. Can one be foolish to be so honest? Or appear the fool to others?

I am seriously doubting my judgement.

Rose