Bi problem

[Clarmane]

We had a nigt of fun with another couple,my wife and the other woman just could not get enough of each other(big turnon for me) the guy was about twice my size(a bit of a homopfobe),witch she also enjoyed.She knows that i am bi and wants to have a mmf 3some,but the idea of me and another man turns her off.No man has ever turned me on,but a penis does.I am not into anal sex,just oral.Why the double standards?

 

[bi_asian_guy]

*****

 

[Evan Ver]

the Double Standard

You asked why the double standard.

My guess is:

She wants a mmf threesome because two men servicing her and being into her is a turn on.

She does not want you to have any male action because in her eyes it will make you less "manly", or she may be worried about you liking the experience too much and deciding you are gay.

From what I've read these are pretty common thoughts/worries for some women.

 

[sunandshadow]

I would tell her that if she gets to try it it's only fair that you do too, but if she doesn't if she prefers not to participate then you can just do it without her present.

 

[neonflux]

It certainly doesn't seem fair. And without knowing more, or hearing from her, I find it a little disquieting that she enjoyed the fact that the other guy was a homophobe. Have you talked to her about the experience? And what has she said about explaining her feelings. All relationships are difficult and require work - I think that bringing others into it can often make it more so. This is coming from someone in an open relationship, btw, so I am not being judgmental of that choice.

I firmly believe that in order for poly, swinging, etc. to work, a couple must not only be exceedingly honest with each other, but they must also treat each other with upmost consideration - any third or 4th that they bring into the relationship must also be able to do the same... (I've played with couples in the past and this was always foremost in my own mind - to acknowledge and respect their relationship with each other first.)

It's hard to give advice without knowing more...

Neon

 

[PredatorSmile]

I would tell her that if she gets to try it it's only fair that you do too, but if she doesn't if she prefers not to participate then you can just do it without her present.

I agree with that statement. Selfishness has no place in a loving union.