Beau-tay or not Beau-tay

[Oscuridad]

I'm new here (obviously) and thought I'd introduce myself by being dreadfully boring and starting an argument or two.

I'll start by saying that I am an avowed enemy of the advertising, cosmetics and weight-loss industires. I'm none to keen on high-fashion and see no point in the "models" currently be-dotting the covers of periodicals everywhere.

The reason is this. I think theyre all full of it. I think they lead people to want things or admire things they would not normally have wanted or admired. Why? Beacuse that is where they make thier money (follow the money).

I think they harm women by creating a intentionally daunting "goal" to attain, and then slide their product out from behind their backs and before our noses saying "but this will get you there". They make you feel like crap so they can sell you something to make you feel better. And then 30 seconds later, they do it again.

It would be less bad if this were something one could just brush off (I know a few who can) but for others the condidtioning of self-perceived imperfection is so deeply rooted in the acceptance of their peers and even parents - dating back to their birth - that there is small hope of ever getting fully past it.

Men I think get coralled by a sort of "not wanting to be left out" of whatever look, woman, etc. is now popular. So they all say to each other "_ is so hot!" regardless of whether they think so or not. It's the sort of place seeking hierarchical behavior that also will set goals for coolest car, job, or what have you. For those of us not blessed with all the money it takes to win these pointlessly superficial battles, it just becomes a game of "I wanna be like Mike" only far more evil.

Sure, some DO think model "x" is hot. However I think that even they do not have so narrow or restricted an idea of what is beautiful. So even the retort i've heard a million times "it's what men want" rings so very hollow regardless of who says it. No, its what men have been told to want. Even when it is, its not the only end-all and be-all. For meit's not at all.

I come finally to my personal view and my point.

Beauty IS in the eye of the beholder. It is that quality that quickens the pulse and brings a hot feeling to the face which can be anything... Visual, aural, textual... You name it. It can be they way they held you that time when you needed it most. Or the way they called you an absolute moron when you thought you were at the top of your intellectual game.

What engages one human to desire another cannot be and should not be dictated as it has been for as log as anyone can remember. We all need to be free to love and be loved without being mocked, or to have to feel someow inadequate in ourselves. We should be free to reach out, unshackled bu self-doubt. Then whatever happens happens, that's life.

For my part I cannot abide any woman who is intentionally thin. I think it's sick in a world with so much suffering from hunger to play a rich Man's game of who is thinnest and prettiest. Besides, it is NO fun to cuddle a stick (unabashed personal opinion).

Makeup, fancy or provocative clothes I can take it or leave it. Of all the people I have adored, they have always been able to be just as alluring to me in a shapeless mass of bulky clothes as in anyting else (here's a hint... sexy is in the eyes before it's anywhere else). Dress to please yourself. If pleasing yourself means pleasing your partner, fine. So be it.

What attracts my attention, what will always attract my attention is a stark individuality. Not blue hair and spikes sort of canned individuality, but a look of comfort in one's own skin. Confidence. Which is why these things I mentioned way back at the beginning are my foes. They destroy that precious confidence. That self-worth that makes a goddess of every woman and a god of every man... At least in the eyes of those that would cherish them, if in no other place.

I will now stop ranting and duck behind this modest pile of cinderblocks.

 

[penguindance]

 

[Purple Haze]

Welcome!

Take your shoes off,

Tell us a little about yourself...

 

[Stout chap]

The atypical covergirl female is a disgrace to the feminism movement, b'god! These women aren't looking good for themselves; they're doing it for the gratification of men, you follow?

I find it important to study the advertising campaigns of the merchandise I buy, otherwise I won't know which lifestyle I'm endorsing. (lol!)

What is fashion other than a conspiracy to make you throw out perfectly good clothes before they have worn out? And don't tell me it's about self-expression, because you'd just ignore it if you were truly individual.

 

[lost]

LOL, welcome

 

[Rubyfruit]

That was quite an introduction, Oscuridad.

It's nice to learn a little bit about you.

Welcome to the madness.

 

[bluemuse]

Please don't hold back, Oscuridad.

Welcome to Lit.

 

[Oscuridad]

*blink* was expecting that someone was going to disagree.

Wow, this place is unlike anywhere else I've stated that opinion.

Perhaps I have at least immediately secured a reputation for talking too much

 

[peachykeen]

Well, the way I see it, God did not create all of the ingredients for Breyer's Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream in order for me to NOT eat it.

I do, however, like a bit of girlie girl-ness in my life. I'm not often to be found without my lipstick, I like getting my nails done, you won't catch me out with scraggly eyebrows, and I'm never late for a leg wax. But that's my choice.

High heels, though, are the work of Satan.

 

[Stout chap]

High heels, though, are the work of Satan.

My sentiments precisely, peachy. They play havoc on the old heels, b'god!

 

[Guest]

 

[Pyper]

Did someone call for oposition?

Okay, I'll give some opposition. Please don't take this as hostility directed towards you, Oscuridad. I don't want to scare off an intelligent newbie. We need all that we can get.

[rant]
I'm sick and tired of this backlash against the fashion industry resulting in hostility towards thin women. It seems to be okay nowadays to insult thin women at will, as if it is their fault that they are skinny. Imagine the uproar there would have been if Oscuridad had said, "it's no fun to cuddle a whale". When insults like this are flung, the masses rise up in defense, but no one makes a peep when thin women are called sticks, anorexic, bags of bones, or accused of not eating to maintain their image.

Well, listen up people. I'm thin because that's the way I am. I can't control my body type any more than you can control yours. I don't appreciate being called a stick any more than you would appreciate being called a lardbucket.

I think women who take our their anger on thin women or blame their insecurities on the fashion industry are suffering from deeper insecurities that may not always have to do with their appearance. They believe themselves to be fat already, and their fears are only heightened by what they see in the media.

Fashion models are incredibly tall, not just thin. Why aren't women insecure about their height if they are using fashion models as the perfect prototype? There are male fashion models as well, who are usually well-muscled and athletic. Do men accuse the fashion industry of abusing them by making them think they should be well-muscled and athletic? Do they viciously attack athletic men for being as such? No.

Women know, just as all humans know, being overweight is unhealthy and unattractive (I'm going to get flamed for this). Americans are the most overweight people on earth, but try to fool themselves into thinking that they are average by setting up people in the media who are within the normal range as too thin. I can't cast any moral judgement on overweight women for being overweight, and I all would ask that people stop casting moral judgement on me for being too thin.

[/rant]

 

[MissVictoria]

Women know, just as all humans know, being overweight is unhealthy and unattractive

*takes a deep breath and prepares to rant* ... ah, nevermind. I'll let someone else say it for me.

 

[asenath]

I agree 100% with Pyper. I have no idea why it's okay to bash thin women, but it's beyond annoying.

 

[Pyper]

Damn, and I haven't been flamed in so long!

What I meant with that inflammatory statement is that "normal" weight is not just a number. It's a large range depending on your height and other factors. Women who are voluptuous or heavy-hipped are not necessarily overweight, and are more likely to get pregnant and bear healthy children that a thin woman.

That said, I stand by my original statement.

 

[Pyper]

hijack

BTW, damn you Miss Victoria (and Never too) for getting me involved in Neopets! May I visit your incredibly over-priced shop?

/hijack

 

[asenath]

I should clarify one thing, though. What’s attractive to one person may not be attractive to another. I don’t find thin men attractive, and I’m not into the muscled look either. A little tummy on a man is appealing to me for some reason even though it's not really healthy.

 

[MissVictoria]

hijack

BTW, damn you Miss Victoria (and Never too) for getting me involved in Neopets! May I visit your incredibly over-priced shop?

/hijack

Actually I don't really have any overpriced items in my shop right now besides the cloud aisha stuff which I'm collecting.

Knock yourself out!

And... yes, it is addicting, isn't it?

http://www.neopets.com/browseshop.phtml?owner=nazca1978

 

[Oscuridad]

Re: Did someone call for oposition?

Okay, I'll give some opposition. Please don't take this as hostility directed towards you, Oscuridad. I don't want to scare off an intelligent newbie. We need all that we can get.

[rant]
I'm sick and tired of this backlash against the fashion industry resulting in hostility towards thin women. It seems to be okay nowadays to insult thin women at will, as if it is their fault that they are skinny. Imagine the uproar there would have been if Oscuridad had said, "it's no fun to cuddle a whale". When insults like this are flung, the masses rise up in defense, but no one makes a peep when thin women are called sticks, anorexic, bags of bones, or accused of not eating to maintain their image.

Well, listen up people. I'm thin because that's the way I am. I can't control my body type any more than you can control yours. I don't appreciate being called a stick any more than you would appreciate being called a lardbucket.

I think women who take our their anger on thin women or blame their insecurities on the fashion industry are suffering from deeper insecurities that may not always have to do with their appearance. They believe themselves to be fat already, and their fears are only heightened by what they see in the media.

Fashion models are incredibly tall, not just thin. Why aren't women insecure about their height if they are using fashion models as the perfect prototype? There are male fashion models as well, who are usually well-muscled and athletic. Do men accuse the fashion industry of abusing them by making them think they should be well-muscled and athletic? Do they viciously attack athletic men for being as such? No.

Women know, just as all humans know, being overweight is unhealthy and unattractive (I'm going to get flamed for this). Americans are the most overweight people on earth, but try to fool themselves into thinking that they are average by setting up people in the media who are within the normal range as too thin. I can't cast any moral judgement on overweight women for being overweight, and I all would ask that people stop casting moral judgement on me for being too thin.

[/rant]

Well said. I agree that Coming down on someone for "the way they naturally are" is just nasty. In my thread I had said:
"For my part I cannot abide any woman who is intentionally thin."
Note the word 'intentionally'. If you are thin of nature's accord, then I have nothing to say on the matter.

The thing that upsets me is the forcible inadequacy that gets jammed down the throats of others. "Beauty Mummies" like Helen Gurley Brown (cosmo) ram thier skeletal-ness down the throats of women who might have never stared at a mirror in despair if they hadn't called them out as "fat". But the same thing happens (albeit less frequently) with thinness.

I have certainly not taken your post as an attack. Not at all, I just want my position to be clear. I did also say that "Besides, it is NO fun to cuddle a stick (unabashed personal opinion)". But that is a personal opinion built on personal experiences. For that i owe something of an apology to those I have offended.

Thank you for chiming in Pyper, asenath, and Miss Victoria