Battlescar Galactica

[Lovely Latina]

Hey everyone...'member me? Lovely Latina?...LL?...Loooooofah Lovely?...Smiley Girl?...Lovely Lashina?...ummm...Grape Juice Woman?...ahhh fuck it!

It's good to be back.

I just returned from an out-of-town trade show in lovely Las Vegas, NV...home of gambling and free alcohol (Ha!...tell me they DON'T know what they're doing); home of legalized prostitution and our beloved Weird Harold (implication of direct correlation not intended...hehe <wink> ); and home of cheap all-you-can buffets and Elvis impersonators (direct correlation intended). Oh! And can't forget Nexxus' "pink taco juices" (whatever the fruck THEY are...seems like I missed out somehow...oh well <shrug> ). BUT...Hubby and I more than doubled our money two nights in a row at the blackjack tables ("dangerous" is the irresistable allure, Laurel...lol), so I'm a happy, little (addicted) gambler.

Anywhoooo...<cue theme from "Jaws">

"Duhn nuh"

Watched some scenes from the movie "Jaws" earlier tonite.

"Duhn nuh duhn nuh"

There was a scene on the boat where the three men were discussing the various "battle scars" they had incurred during their adventures at sea, and I thought it would be interesting to learn about the injuries, broken bones, scars and dismemberments that our fellow BBer's have experienced. Here are my "major" ones:

1-year-old: I was running around the living room like a lunatic...slipped and fell hitting the sharp, pointed edge of the glass coffee table right above my left eye. Half an inch lower and you'd all be calling me "Lovely Patchina." Had stitches and the hair still doesn't grow on that one little line across my eyebrow.

10-years-old: Being the ultimate tomboy, I was playing "crash up derby" on my dirt bike with the other "boys" from the neighborhood, when I went flying onto the cement chin-first and fractured my jaw. I had to have my mouth wired shut for 6 weeks and carry around a pair of pliers JUST IN CASE I had to puke. (Yeah...like I'd really be able to cut all those wires in time...I think I was 18 before I realized that they just didn't want to tell me that I would choke on my own vomit and die. lol)

23-years-old: I was ice-skating when this sudden "je ne sais quois"(sp?) came over me, making me believe that I had magically transformed into Michelle Kwan. I went to do a spin and fell hard on my ass. Then my leg started to hurt. I was wearing black stretch pants and felt that they were wet on the spot that hurt. I thought that I just must have scraped myself, but when I got home and removed the pants...I had put a big gaping hole in my right calf with my skate blade!! Holy Frijoles! This can't be good, I thought. Hubby enjoyed watching them stitch me up, as well as commenting in awe on the white globules of fat cells oozing forth. (Ahh...gotta love him...da bastage. lol)

K...so those were my major physical traumas...pretty tame...but cool, nonetheless. Anyone else wanna share?

[This message has been edited by Lovely Latina (edited 06-10-2000).]

 

[Laurel]

LATINA!!!!

*grabs her & hugs her so hard I break two of her ribs, poor dear*

I was going to start a "Has Anyone Seen LL Lately?" thread! I was going to send out a search party. No wait - I was going to have a party, that's it. I knew it was something like that... Either way, welcome back, chickie! The board has been so much less silly with you gone!

 

[Lovely Latina]

Awwwwwwwwwwwww...

WHO LOVES YA, BABY!!

*MMMMMMMMWHUH!*

HUUUUUGE

(Ummm...can someone please call 911 for these fractured ribs??? Ummm...ow? <hehe> )



[This message has been edited by Lovely Latina (edited 06-10-2000).]

 

[Laurel]

Add that one to your list, baby! Ribs broken by webmistress of porn site! There's one for the grandkids...

I've never broken a bone. Well, I broke my toe once, but that hardly counts - everyone breaks toes. But I've never had a cast that people could crowd around and sign, never got to walk on crutches at school... I got really hopeful once when I slipped in a creek, but the doctor said it was just a sprain. Damn! But I did get braces on my teeth, which weren't as cool as casts but damn close enough.

 

[Earthgoddess]

Yeah-doing Dirk Benedict was what I thought this might be, but no it's even better!!!
It's our dear friend LL people have been asking,know why??
Because we missed you!!!!
And look I have a roll of ace bandages right here,*leaning over to hand them to LL*
my physical wounds list is a bit grisly-
age2-broken leg after running from mother on newly waxed kitchen floormother yelled"Be careful you could slip."
age4-broken leg(other leg this time)running in living room,slipped on Disney comic and bashed my shin into mahogany coffee table. Mother's vioce wafting over me as I fall in slow motion-"Careful you are going to slip".
I broke both my leg and the table.
age12-Mom and I are playing tag and she runs into the kitchen and goes to slam the door-I was doing a 3Stooges thing and stuck my foot in the door just in time to have her break it.
age16-working with lighting crew in highschool-directing them from stage while walking backwards-falls of stage-breaking ankle.
age 18-working in college theatre-nailgunned self to set-hand only.
age19-doing movement theatre piece with a complicated lift-partner did not release me as he threw me-held onto both wrists-dislocated both shoulders.
age 22-working in cafe-my staff(comprised of hubby and best friend) are arguing-I repeatedly ask for help since I am carrying a 50 pound cont. of flour...they keep yelling,I drop cont. I break toe. We have no insurance I fix it myself.
age23-same cafe,finger caught in door-broken-no insurance,set it using spoons for splint.
age31-helping friend move I decide to be butch and carry a huge air conditioner by myself-did fine until door swung open and bashed my hand-two broken fingers-once again no insurance-set them using a spatula and medical tape.
age32-insurance and odd looks from doctor as hubby forces me to tell him how often I have set my own stuff-xrays done, doctor surprised at how well I did-ordered to never do this again unless we are stuck in wilderness.

 

[Magic Merlin]

Also runs up to Lovely and gives her a big hug......Your back!!

Yipee...yay.......We Missed You, LL.....

Hey everyone, she's baaaccckkkk.....

..Now, don't you ever do that again, young lady.....going off and not telling us where you've been.....We were worried sick.....madam had search parties out all over the place looking for you.....Of course, looking in Las Vegas never occurred to us....thats Weird Harold's territory.....

Whew! Now that I got that out of my system.....You've missed intrigue....you've missed bickering.......You've missed sex.....the longest party thread in the world....You've missed Xander impersonating a fireman..you've missed...uh.....Nope, I guess things are pretty much the same as when you left.....except..

<whispers softly in LL's ear>check out Wizard and his 'fish kissing'...darndest thing I ever did see..

Scars, huh...Get this..an eight year old boy who thinks he is superman and attempts to leap a tall building with a single bound (actually small concrete block), catches lead foot on corner of building as he leaps, sending him face first into opposite corner of building, landing with a thud as head hits sharp corner of concrete leaving a gaping hole above right eye...

Wouldn't have been as bad, except the closest doctor lived more than 30 miles at the time..Gave me three stiches....so cool.....

And pissed my older sisters off at the time cause I got lots of attention for the next week or so.....How's that.....has left me with 'battlescar' aboe right eye....Coool, huh?

Welcome back, Lovely...As Madam said, we missed you lots...especially your silliness

Earth, dear, OUCH!! Please be careful....Don't want you falling over one of these threads and tripping We want you around here for a long time

[This message has been edited by magic merlin (edited 06-10-2000).]

 

[Shylady]

Welcome back LL
i have a scar on the toe next to the big one on my right foot. I had 3 stitches from almost cutting it off!
When i was 12 a boy was on his bike was trying to knock me down and i fell as i was trying to make it to safety broke my right wrist.
And I have the scar from my 3 c-sections. But would rather have those 3 scars than not have my kids.

 

[Cheyenne]

Battle scars, huh?

Age 18 broken big toe at bottom of water slide. Don't ask.

Age 28 Jart landed on head. Reading a book (of course) sitting under a tree away from other relatives at a boring party, child lofts a Jart accidently and it lands right in the middle of my head. No wonder these Jarts were pulled from the market. Lots of blood, first trip to emergency room in my life. Luckily, I have a hard head.

Age 32: Ugly mole removed from chin. First stitches in my life.

Age 36 Black ice on driveway (I thought it was just rain!). Fell and cracked elbow, lots of blood again. Emergency room, stitches again. Try not leaning on your elbow for a few months. Your table manners improve.

Age 37 Carrying niece, fell on broken edge of road. Landed niece safely on top of me, but sprained BOTH my ankles at the same time. Back to same emergency room to receive compliment that they didn't even have to change the admitting cause since the last time since "Fall" still applied. Don't let anyone fool you, sprains take MONTHS to heal properly.

Age 37 again (bad year) - cancer scare and moles cut off stomach and arm. No cancer, lovely white scars from yet more stitches.

Knock on wood.... no more falls, etc. in the last 5 years.

 

[Sammyjo]

I have a scar over my left eye from when I was about 5. I tripped, fell into a dining room table, ended up with 5 stitches, and bragging rights in the Kindergarten class as the toughest chick!!! (cuz there was no crying...not cuz I thought I could beat everyone up)

I have a scar on my right leg from when I was 16 and the GD screw on the GD lawn mower reached out and cut me right to the bone. That one would have hurt if I wasn't drunk.

I also have a scar from my C-section. Which one guy claims to have NOT NOTICED...is he blind? or trying to make me feel better? This one doesn't bother me, and I actually didn't even think about it until Shylady mentioned hers...maybe it isn't all that noticeable.

 

[Guest]

Bonjour, Latina Belle!!! Wondered where you'd got to.

Broken bones? Nope never. I bruised my coccyx once falling down some stairs. OUCH!! (That's the bone above your ass... well, MY ass actually.) I felt like I'd been sharing a cell with a man named, Bubba, for way too many months

Apart from that, I'm relatively unblemished, barring a minor abrasion - a thin white scar - on the first finger of my right hand, where a test-tube broke in my chemistry class at school.

I'm feeling a bit left out. I haven't even managed to break a toe yet.

I think what all this means is I need to get out and about a bit more.

Once, though, Sammy Jo - a long time ago (in a galaxy far, far away... sorry, wrong film) I saw a C-section being performed. (I WAS supposed to be there, by the way, I was a trainee psychie nurse.) All I can say is, I've never watched 'Alien' since.



rog

 

[Nexxus]

Welcome back Lovely.
The "juice" you missed was superb. The Hard Rock Cafe has a resturant attached called, quite appropriately, The Pink Taco. It takes some folks a minute to get the meaning, but once they try the drink (ala Pink Taco Juice)its all you can do to not smile and giggle like a little school girl, which she wasn't I swear. Well try to prove it anyway.
As far as scars, i have to admit I am a severe scar virgin. I have a couple of boring scars (nothing that compares to the droves of lacerations I'm reading about!)but nothing that could even raise an eyebrow.
So welcome back and settle in, it seems general feeling is this BB is not the same without you. Long live the queen.

Nex

 

[Xander]

Welcome back LL. Good to have you back.
Oh and don't believe MM. I'm not a fireman I'm just faster than him LOL.

Anyway. Battlescars you say. Okay here is the long and sad line of Xander scars.

Age 1: Surgical scar from removewal of a cancer tumor. (I was born with it)

Age 6: Car accident 1#. Have my skull cracked open.

Age 9: Fell on a steep hill. Slided down on my butt and over a number of sharp rocks. Cut open my right thigh.

Age 10: Broke two fingers in a door.

Age 11: Broke four fingers working in the garden.

Age 12: Fell on my bike. Got a scar on my forhead and my right wrist.

Age 13: Skateboard accident 1#. Knee slided across a nail on a ramp.

Age 13: Skateboard accident 2#. Broke my right wrist & arm.

Age 14: Gym accident. Dislocated left shoulder.

Age 15: car accident 2#. Got from behind and side mirror slashed my back.
Got various fight scars that year also.

Age 16 - 20: Minor injuries from fights. Greatest hits I think is the time I got beaten with a baseball bat, and one time got kicked in the face.

Age 21: car accident 3#. Got hit while riding a bike. Send me flying about 6-7 feet.

Age 22: Car accident 4#. Got my left foot run over.

Age 24: Was attacked after a night out. had two rips kicked in.

Age 25: Right knee did a 180 on me. Had to have reconstructical surgery.

That's about it. And yes I am known as one of this countrys' most unlucky bastards. And I'm on a first name basis with the staff of the ERs' in Ringsted, Aarhus and Hobro.

 

[Sammyjo]

Roger, are you saying my child is an alien? or am I too stupid to understand what you are saying?

 

[Lasher]

Speaking of "Battlestar Galatica"... I could never quite understand the whole Lorne Green in space thing.

 

[Raindrop]

Earthgoddess and Xander... DAMN!!!
So glad y'all are still alive!

(Sorry I am in Texas, please forgive me...)

hmmmm scars
when I was two I feel down a full flight of stairs but landed on my ass haha

I think I was <b>9</b> (hope this bold thing works...) when my cat fell out of a tree and I caught him in my arms...but his claws were out and so I have this scar on my innter left breast.

When I was 17 I was in an aweful horse back riding accident and was rammed into a tree and then fell head first onto a rock... (that certainly explains a lot now doesn't it?) so I had to have staples in my head for a while. My hair totally covers that scar but there was also one on my face by the bridge of my nose but it is so faint that I can only notice or even remember it every couple of months or so.

And of course, the emergency hack job of a c-section when I was 19 forever leaves me with a scar, inside and out.

That is all I can think of .... for now...

Welcome back LL, was missing you!

Luv
-raindrop

 

[Gil]

You've been gone? Well then, I guess I've missed you too

Scars hmmmm? ...the worst would be the invisible one from unrequited love. Damn thing just won't heal.

 

[Laurel]

Speaking of "Battlestar Galatica"... I could never quite understand the whole Lorne Green in space thing.

Yeah, it was really confusing when I was a kid watching reruns of Bonanza in the morning and reruns of Battlestar Galactica in the afternoon. I mean, who was the REAL Lorne - the calm, level-headed father in the wild west, or the calm, level-headed commander of the spaceship?

 

[Guest]

Originally posted by sammyjo:
Roger, are you saying my child is an alien? or am I too stupid to understand what you are saying?

Aw, Sammy, sorry - of course I'm not saying that. I just meant that watching the operation was a bit like that scene with John Hurt in 'Alien'. Medical humour's always a bit dark, sorry.

rog
xx

 

[Gil]

I'm guessing it was a "frontier" thing. Being the adventurous sort, I imagine Mr. Greene liked "to go where no man has gone before." Speaking of which...where's Melody?

 

[Sammyjo]

Ok Roger...I never saw the damn Alien movies so I have no f***ing clue what you are talking about...

 

[Guest]

That's ok, SJ - I've no idea what I'm talking about either.

I've just remembered my other wound - a big white scar on my right arm where I got a mole cut out by a trainee doctor. She made a bit of a mess stitching it back up. People keep asking me if I've had a tattoo removed.

 

[Wizard]

Welcome back LL!

Talk about scars, I have so many to mention but will two 14 inch scars on each side of me count? two kidney transplants later.

 

[Tony]

QUICK!!!! SOMEBODY GET A COFFEE MUGG AND A BUTTER KNIFE..EARTHGODESS NEEDS AN APPENDECTOMY!!!!!!

 

[Hullo_nurse]

And one year...
At band camp...

Ok, it wasn't at band camp, but it was in marching band. I twisted my knee reaalllly good. So good that I tore all the cartalidge and the ligaments and tendons. OUCH!!! I had knee surgery when I was 16. So now my left knee has a smiley face with 2 dimples (they tried to do laprascopic surgery & found I had fucked the knee up too bad & had to do open-knee instead).

#2 happened at the neighbor's across the street when I was about 12. The lawn chair didn't like me and when I got up the edge of the armrest sliced my wrist. It looks like I was a lamo and tried to commit sucide on thewrong side of my wrist. POrobably wouldn't even be there if the p's had actually taken me to the doctor to get stitches, but they said "it's not that bad.

#3 is on my left ankle. Imagine triping down the cement steps and landing on your face with your toes still on the bottom step but your ankle on the ground when you are rushing to catch dad before he leaves you behind. I bled like crazy!! Again, no stitches or I probably wouldn't have a scar.

And LL, welcum back hun!!

Sammyjo...why don't ya cum'ere and let me take a look-see at your tummy & I'll tell ya whether or not that scar still shows

 

[Tony]

AGE 5 SOME BRICKS I WAS PLAYING WITH FELL ON MY FINGER,BUT THE BAD PART WAS WHEN DAD USED A TINY DRILL BIT TO DRILL A HOLE IN MY FINGER NAIL TO RELIEVE THE PRESSURE.

AGE 8 PUT AN ICE PICK THROUGH THE PALM OF MY HAND WHILE TRYING TO PUT HOLES IN THE LID OF A GLASS JAR(I NEEDED THE JAR TO CATCH BEE'S WITH).

AGE 16 SMASHED 3 FINGERS ON MY LEFT HAND WHILE TRYING TO LOAD UP SOME BROKEN CONCRETE
SPLIT THE BONES ON THE INDEX AND MIDDLE FINGERS, AND LOST THE FINGER NAILS ON ALL 3.

AGE 34 TORE A.C.L AND CARTILAGE IN RIGHT KNEE,PLAYING HOCKEY