Bad Valentines Day Love Pomes.

[Betticus]

Since Valentines day is coming up and since it is a totally made up fake holiday used to sell people stuff they don't need or ever knew they wanted....

Let us poke fun at those who take stuff way too seriously with some witty humor and purposefully bad grammer and speiling.

 

[Betticus]

roses are red,
my car is filled with blow,
i'll bail you out,
and let's go to mexico

 

[Betticus]

Roses are red
And so are your lips
Probably because of the psychology of makeup-makers because the lips are used as a symbol of a woman's vagina, which becomes redder, fuller and plumper when aroused and engorged with blood. By painting the lips red, it symbolizes that the woman is aroused and interested in a mate and is using it as a signal to attract attention to that fact.
Something about your nips.

 

[Betticus]

Red is the rose
And blue is the sky
Bite the pillow, my darling
I'm going in dry

 

[Betticus]

Roses are red
Wine is too
Are you feeling sleepy?
Roofies'll do that to you.

 

[KoPilot]

roses are red
violets are blue
I'm really lazy
let's go get ramen

 

[Niam1985]

Roses are red
And so is that rash
Pardon me, Darling
But Ive gotta dash

 

[midwestyankee]

Roses are red
And daisies are not
Look at this flogger
That I just bought.

 

[midwestyankee]

Roses are good
Violets are fine
I prefer Valentines
Held down with twine.

Bravo!

 

[DeepGreenEyes]

The love-hushed whispers
Of a muted tern
Lost in dusky pink
Preening the silence.

That's a fancy way
To say be quiet
When you suck my dick
During overtime.

Now, more multigrain
Tostitos scoops. Quick.

 

[Curious_in_Cali]

Love. Love. Love.
Magic fluffy unicorn romances
with syrupy slow kisses
and longing lingering glances.

Sweet. Can we fuck now?

 

[Collar_N_Cuffs]

Roses are pink
Like your ass.
If you don't believe me
Turn around and look

 

[sensualsharon]

Roses are red,
violets are blue.
They'll need dental records
to identify you.

I only wish I could claim that little gem, but it was in a movie and always stuck with me.

 

[Betticus]

How do I love thee
Let me count the ways

Sandwiches.

 

[Ahlam]

First names are blurry,
and donkeys are asses
Your twat smells like curry
and I want to fog your glasses.

 

[Collar_N_Cuffs]

Hello Valentine!
Can I get a kiss from you
for this bad haiku?

 

[Miles Long]

When thou dost suck it,
Thou art more perfect than e'er could be devised.
For I like thee how I like mine coffee:
Silent.

 

[FurryFury]

Roses are red
Whatever
Here is some candy
Are we good yet?

 

[Miles Long]

Roses are red
Your soul is pitch black
When I see your face
You'll get a bitch smack.

 

[midwestyankee]

Callebaut is brown
And I can no longer run
Come lay 'cross my knee
So we can have some fun.