Bad Random Life Tips.

[mulehead61]

When in quick need of a breath mint at the bar you can use the ones in the urinals.

 

[stickygirl]

If you hit your thumb with a hammer and it hurts like hell, hit another finger and it'll half the pain

 

[mnbreastluver]

Break up with your significant other so you don’t have to buy them a Christmas present.

 

[mnbreastluver]

Never underestimate the power of an unexpectedly generous tip. The next time you get a delivery, slip a $20 bill in the driver’s thong. Their expression will be priceless.

 

[sally_sparrow]

If your friend is jumping off of a bridge it's probably because they know something that you don't, so go ahead.

 

[mnbreastluver]

Establish a history of mental illness in case you ever need to prove yourself insane in a court of law.

 

[MrPractical]

If your friend is jumping off of a bridge it's probably because they know something that you don't, so go ahead.

Admire a red headed girl...

 

[sally_sparrow]

Lower your standards and you will enjoy everything.

 

[MrPractical]

Know your standards.. and make sure you are flexible

 

[mnbreastluver]

If you have a GF always wear an hair tie around your wrist for a quick deployment ponytail in BJ situation

 

[Deleted member 3041612]

Run in the direction of the coughing/sneezing person you see.

 

[mnbreastluver]

Always undercook your food so you don’t have to wait for it to cool down.

 

[sally_sparrow]

If you want to know what the rooms are like in a hotel chain that you will be visiting, search the hotel chain's name on PornHub.

 

[mnbreastluver]

Do you feel like your house is cold? Just light it on fire, it will get very warm within a matter of seconds.

 

[sally_sparrow]

If you're feeling sick, drink boiling water to sterilize your insides.

 

[mnbreastluver]

If your foot is sleeping and you get that tingling sensation, put a toothpick between your large toe and its nail, then kick the wall. That'll fix the sleeping foot issue.

 

[JerseyJade]

If you're feeling sick, drink boiling water to sterilize your insides.

Good lord!

9 out of 10 people want to have Sally as their doctor. Don't be the one that doesn't.

 

[sally_sparrow]

Good lord!

9 out of 10 people want to have Sally as their doctor. Don't be the one that doesn't.

If you are unsure how to train your new puppy to not go to the bathroom in the house, pee on your walls to mark your territory.

 

[mnbreastluver]

Now that it’s winter, if you get a buildup of ice on your windshield, place sandpaper under both blades and let it run for a few minutes. Use low grit for best results.

 

[Rainydaythings]

.....

 

[Deleted member 3041612]

Make eye contact with strangers in an elevator.

I actually do this, depending on who.


Fart in an elevator by yourself and get out leaving AIR of suspicion.

 

[peterherring425]

If toast lands butter side down ... butter the edges instead

 

[mnbreastluver]

Use Plastic Wrap As A Waterproof Phone Case

 

[stickygirl]

If you have a leaky bay window and the drips fall on your duvet, drive a nail into the ceiling with a piece of string attached. Set at an angle, the string will now lead the water away from your bed and into a bucket. YW

(You should then contact your landlord and tell the fucker come and fix his shitty house and not use his mate to bodge it again.)

 

[mnbreastluver]

Annoyed of getting random erections during the day and in public? Always carry a condom on you. When you get a random boner, just put the condom on and your dick will go soft instantly!