Bad Random Life Tips.

[HotBrand]

In the event of someone being stung by a jellyfish, immediately run to them, and piss on their leg.

If the person injured was stung in the leg, this is an added bonus.

 

[HotBrand]

If you are ever in the presence of a god of love and sex, always remember to show the proper respect by prostrating yourself.

 

[stickygirl]

A toilet brush, sprayed with pine-scented cleaner, and planted in a jam jar makes a novel and elegant centrepiece to table decoration

 

[HotBrand]

Wasps are easily intimidated.

If one stings you, swat it, and watch the rest fly away.

In the VERY HIGHLY UNLIKELY POSSIBLY COULD HAPPEN scenario that they *don't* retreat, calmly walk up to their nest while ignoring their stings, and stomp on said nest.

That'll show them.

 

[mnbreastluver]

If you know anyone that alone for the holidays let me know. I want to borrow some chairs.

 

[sally_sparrow]

Save money on exfoliating scrub by adopting a cat and letting them lick your face.

 

[mnbreastluver]

If your fingers get messy from eating Christmas treats and you don’t have anything to wipe them on, call your cat over and wipe them on it’s fur. Cats are neat freaks and will immediately clean themselves off.

 

[stickygirl]

Skin blisters ca easily be removed with a pumice stone or emery cloth

 

[HotBrand]

When holidaying in the Netherlands, remember that the Dutch are famous for their windmills.

Immediately integrate with local culture by spinning your penis around upon arrival.

 

[mnbreastluver]

To save money on alcohol, fast 24 hours beforehand to maximize the effects

 

[MrPractical]

Continue driving when your gas gauge is on E.....You have at least 200 miles left

 

[stickygirl]

Once you've been cold a while your body gets used to it, you feel warm again and you can fall asleep

 

[mnbreastluver]

You can drive as fast as you like when it's snowing really badly because the cops are busy dealing with accidents

 

[sally_sparrow]

Perseverance is the key to homewrecking. Never give up.

 

[HotBrand]

This is GENUINELY RECEIVED bad life advice:

When driving, don't worry about indicating if you are going to turn.

Indicators are for other people to tell you where they are going.

You already know you are going so there is no need to indicate.

 

[stickygirl]

Your neighbours will be grateful if you help them be environmentally prudent, by looking through their trash and making suggestions.

 

[sally_sparrow]

Get blackout drunk and go online shopping.

 

[HotBrand]

Your neighbours will be grateful if you help them be environmentally prudent, by looking through their trash and making suggestions.

I'm breaking a rule here but I *LOVED* this one. Loved. It.

 

[fisherfella]

Chainsaws are your friend...

 

[Lord Pmann]

That fever is no big deal.

 

[sally_sparrow]

It’s not a big deal, jump in. No one ever remembers this, but people just instinctually know how to swim.

 

[alwaysaway]

That fever is no big deal.

That’s true. Because you can cure it with more cowbell!

 

[Lord Pmann]

That’s true. Because you can cure it with more cowbell!

That’s probably why COVID is so rampant. They’re trying to treat with bullshit vaccines and they just need a little BOC inspired cowbell.

 

[sally_sparrow]

Don't smell it, just eat it quickly.

 

[Lord Pmann]

Don't smell it, just eat it quickly.

Is this food or sexual?