Bad from the git-go.

[TxRad]

Yes scouries, JBJ lives in North Florida like you live in South Florida.

And the only reason he mentioned you was to piss everyone else off. You're useful that way.

If someone can find it, there was a thread called, Happy hookers by Rumpledforeskin that was very informative on opening hooks. Maybe someone can revive it for the newer folks around.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

Yes scouries, JBJ lives in North Florida like you live in South Florida.

And the only reason he mentioned you was to piss everyone else off. You're useful that way.

If someone can find it, there was a thread called, Happy hookers by Rumpledforeskin that was very informative on opening hooks. Maybe someone can revive it for the newer folks around.

I dont live in North Florida.

You and Scouries are the two best LIT writers I've read. But top-notch writers are as rare as NFL pros, prolly more scarce. However I do believe 2/3rds of all writers could be lots better if they spent less time writing and more time learning the nuts & bolts of the craft. My old pal Dickens managed to put his hook on the first page, every time, and most of them are gems.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

just try to remember, adults don't talk about peepees. Or weewees, or tee tees or ta tas.

Well, some adults talk about ta tas.

The adults I associate with talk about peepees.

 

[colddiesel]

I dunno whether James can write, let alone write a good hook for a story, but he knows a good hook for a thread - just use the Scouries fly and the AH fish will come a jumpin'.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

I dunno whether James can write, let alone write a good hook for a story, but he knows a good hook for a thread - just use the Scouries fly and the AH fish will come a jumpin'.

My idea of a good all-around hook is something unexpected that can go plenty of different places.

Like these hooks from real life: I'm sitting in a livingroom talking to a guy, he has his back to his bedroom door, and his wife opens the door naked. He has no idea of the show I'm getting from wifey. Another time, in a marriage counceling session, the couple are parked on the sofa holding hands, and wifey opens her legs for some SHOW BUT DONT TELL. Yet another time a friend goes to the bathroom, and while he's away wifey opens wide and plays with herself. And during a session with mom and kid, the kid unbuttons mom's blouse exposing mom to me. The examples are endless. How about this one: Pregnant mom wants you to feel the baby move and presses your paw against her crotch.

 

[trysail]

From the GB (which you so abhor):

Snow Fall

The Avalanche at Tunnel Creek

Interesting story. Archetypal people. I'll bet that's the precursor of a book.



____________
As an aside, trying to read the story on-line absolutely re-confirmed that I will never do any serious reading in any form except hard copy. It was awful trying to read that thing. Give me a book.


E-reading blows.

 

[jomar]

...

The method to my madness was stimulated by the thread about Multi-Chapter Stories. So I'm writing one, and I wanna see if I can elicit a different outcome from readers. I think if I set it up correctly readers will wanna see what happens in the other chapters. Really serialize it.

If your really going to try this, pay attention to the views. They tend to dwindle with each chapter...at least mine do.

 

[mikey2much]

I got to hand it to you JBJ

It is too soon to say if you can write a good story. But it seems that you are on the path to promoting it pretty well.

You got us all waiting to see what you can do.

 

[sr71plt]

And the only reason he mentioned you was to piss everyone else off. You're useful that way.

I guess I misread JBJ's comment. I read it to mean that he thought Scouries's stories started off well and then failed as they continued. It would be fun if that's what he meant and is now changing course because of the reaction the comment got.

 

[sr71plt]

I dunno whether James can write

That's rather the point. Because he does this "I'm working on X and gonna show you" stuff routinely, and nothing ever happens. Two months from now someone can pull up this thread and dollars to donuts nothing will have been written/posted.

 

[sr71plt]

If your really going to try this, pay attention to the views. They tend to dwindle with each chapter...at least mine do.

I thought the whole point of the exercise is to make the chapter view numbers go up with each additional chapter. I think I can see being able to do that--keep the number of chapters down, end each one with a bigger cliff hanger than the previous one, and write increasinging provocative blurbs. It's worth a try--perhaps by someone who actually writes and posts to Literotica, though.

 

[scouries]

http://forum.literotica.com/image.php?u=884614&dateline=1351690612
I dont live in North Florida… You and Scouries are the two best LIT writers

Okay this means that your first post didn’t disprove the almost universally accepted theory about North Floridians. So where do you live?

It’s been clearly demonstrated many times that I am the best writer on LITEROTICA which means you are batting .500 on your second statement. Which isn’t a bad average.

And guys, who knows if jimmie johnson can write a good story? But we all know that he has great hair and that he was a great college football coach. So lets all just give him the benefit of the doubt.

As for ace and his continuing problem with reading comprehension I’m afraid that, given his advanced age, there is little hope for improvement in 2013. But let's all hope and pray that he doesn’t get any grumpier… It's funny though - a guy can lose it as senility aproaches but can still make rational comments on other issues. Like this whole gun debate where ace is actually making sense...

http://forum.literotica.com/image.php?u=777159&dateline=1292162962

Oh my gawd! A jomar sighting! Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year man…​

 

[Stella_Omega]

My idea of a good all-around hook is something unexpected that can go plenty of different places.

Like these hooks from real life: I'm sitting in a livingroom talking to a guy, he has his back to his bedroom door, and his wife opens the door naked. He has no idea of the show I'm getting from wifey. Another time, in a marriage counceling session, the couple are parked on the sofa holding hands, and wifey opens her legs for some SHOW BUT DONT TELL. Yet another time a friend goes to the bathroom, and while he's away wifey opens wide and plays with herself. And during a session with mom and kid, the kid unbuttons mom's blouse exposing mom to me. The examples are endless. How about this one: Pregnant mom wants you to feel the baby move and presses your paw against her crotch.

they are all loving wives scenarios. All the same.

 

[TE999]

So the much reviled and despised JBJ is putting gnarled fingers to keys and finally displaying his writing prowess ... or lack of same. Now this should be interesting given the ensuing build-up. Keeping a multi-chapter story afloat is no mean feat; especially here where the average reader's more interested in flogging the log or tickling the beaver than buckling down and reading something over 3,000 words in length.

I, for one, am curious. Post a link when your opus goes up, Jimbo.

 

[sr71plt]

So the much reviled and despised JBJ is putting gnarled fingers to keys and finally displaying his writing prowess

Umm, no, not that this thread evidences. Fooled you again, didn't he?

I guess he keeps doing this because it fools some folks into believing he's actually written anything.

 

[TE999]

Umm, no, not that this thread evidences. Fooled you again, didn't he?

I guess he keeps doing this because it fools some folks into believing he's actually written anything.

Clever ol' bastard, ain't he?

I would be curious to see what he's capable of writing, however. He appears to be reasonably erudite, if excessively critical, sarcastic and prickly. Proofs in the pudding as they say. Let's see what develops ... if anything.

 

[Stella_Omega]

Clever ol' bastard, ain't he?

I would be curious to see what he's capable of writing, however. He appears to be reasonably erudite, if excessively critical, sarcastic and prickly. Proofs in the pudding as they say. Let's see what develops ... if anything.

Ditto this.

 

[sr71plt]

Well, yes. But it's not like we haven't trotted around this barn with him 36 times already.

By talking with him as if he's actually going to write and post something, you serve his purpose of fooling posters here into thinking he already does that. He doesn't/hasn't, and if history can be believed, won't. It's called getting credence on the cheap.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

http://forum.literotica.com/image.php?u=884614&dateline=1351690612
I dont live in North Florida… You and Scouries are the two best LIT writers

Okay this means that your first post didn’t disprove the almost universally accepted theory about North Floridians. So where do you live?

It’s been clearly demonstrated many times that I am the best writer on LITEROTICA which means you are batting .500 on your second statement. Which isn’t a bad average.

And guys, who knows if jimmie johnson can write a good story? But we all know that he has great hair and that he was a great college football coach. So lets all just give him the benefit of the doubt.

As for ace and his continuing problem with reading comprehension I’m afraid that, given his advanced age, there is little hope for improvement in 2013. But let's all hope and pray that he doesn’t get any grumpier… It's funny though - a guy can lose it as senility aproaches but can still make rational comments on other issues. Like this whole gun debate where ace is actually making sense...

http://forum.literotica.com/image.php?u=777159&dateline=1292162962

Oh my gawd! A jomar sighting! Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year man…​

I live in Central Florida about a mile from the Gulf.

I dont claim to be as good as you or TEX but I have a reliable knack for setting peoples hair on fire with a pithy comment or two. You may be better at this than me but I aint far behind you!

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

So the much reviled and despised JBJ is putting gnarled fingers to keys and finally displaying his writing prowess ... or lack of same. Now this should be interesting given the ensuing build-up. Keeping a multi-chapter story afloat is no mean feat; especially here where the average reader's more interested in flogging the log or tickling the beaver than buckling down and reading something over 3,000 words in length.

I, for one, am curious. Post a link when your opus goes up, Jimbo.

I'm trying to keep the installments at 750-900 words, with sexual diverse themes.

 

[JackLuis]

I'm trying to keep the installments at 750-900 words, with sexual diverse themes.

SO, bite sized pieces of porn?

 

[sr71plt]

SO, bite sized pieces of porn?

A whole new way to look at flash fiction.

 

[JAMESBJOHNSON]

SO, bite sized pieces of porn?

Have you ever watched real fucking? Its around 15 minutes of choreographed moves, like a 1/2 time marching band. All I need do is paint a picture of each piece of it. Like, 'Tyrone poured oil over the bitches ass and kneaded it well, working the oil down her crack and pushing it inside her gash and rectum with his long fingers. Tyrone had plans for those holes after Peggy inflated his snake to the recommended size and pressure.'

 

[sr71plt]

So, is this an example of what your prose would be like if you did, in fact, write?

But, you're right--if you make it about a son fucking his mother, you'll do gang busters on Literotica.

 

[TE999]

'Tyrone poured oil over the bitches ass and kneaded it well, working the oil down her crack and pushing it inside her gash and rectum with his long fingers. Tyrone had plans for those holes after Peggy inflated his snake to the recommended size and pressure.'

Heh! I can see that sort of sexual whimsy appealing to the readers. Go easy on the jocular tone though or Laurel will put it in the 'Humor and Satire' cat.