Arousing problems

[alrem]

I've seen so many good questions here and great replies so I think I'll gonna ask something important too.

For several years (maybe 2-3) I've noticed that it's harder for me to be aroused even in the presence of a fully naked woman. Not that they were not good for me but I think, doing this for so many times with different partners somehow makes me too fed up. In fact I think, I'm more aroused while reading stories at Lit rather than being with a partner.

What I do now was to read a good story first or watch movie then use the urge to bang someone.

Aside from that there are times that I'm having an erection only if I'm laying straight on the bed. If I get up or change my position, sometimes I loose the stiffnes that I use to have specially when wearing a rubber. Even if I masturbate, I still need to straightened my legs to have an erection. But I can force my self by closing my eyes and thinking of a very arousing event I know.

Do you think this is still healthy?

 

[TBKahuna123]

Just sounds to me lik eyou are getting old and less visually aroused, happens to the best of us. Seriously though, my wife brought this up the other day because she notice that I don't get hard just seeing her or while I'm going down on her or things like that. Without direct stimulation or some other form of arousal other than simply visual, I don't stay rock hard. She thought maybe I didn't find her attractive anymore. Silly girl.

The fact is I think this is normal for men of advancing age, as in over say 25. Not all men, but many. i'm in my 30's and I'm not in the best shape of my life, which I'm sure also plays a factor. I have noticed that during hockey season when I'm exercising all the time, I am more sexually healthy, so to speak. Problem is I'm also horny all the time. Go figure.

I think it's also just maturity. I find that cerebral as opposed to visual stimulation has more of an effect on me as well. I guess you just reach that stage where a sexy voice and a hot personality is more of a turn on than a nice set of tits. Not that I don't like tits, mind you.

I sounds to me like it's normal, though the lying down thing might be indicitive of some urilogical difficulties. It might not be a bad idea to get checked out, just in case. How old are you and when was your last physical?

 

[alrem]

Thanks for your sharing, I'm just 25 and I think I'm still young for this kind of problems. Although It's quite a time since I had a physical examination and I can't remember when.

I'm really planning to consult an expert when I get the chance.

Do you think that having an active sexual life at an early age can cause this? It started for me when I was 13 or 14 as of what I remember

 

[lizaveta]

You know, some of this might actually be self-fulfilling, too. If everything with your doctor checks out, you might consider that your trouble maintaining an erection without a specific position could be that you had trouble ONCE, or even a couple of times, and now worry about it, and that worry CAUSES the problem to happen again.

I generally don't know what I'm talking about, ever, so this is just something I wanted to throw in the mix.

Good luck to you!
L

 

[TBKahuna123]

You hit it, it could all be mental and these kind of things ARE self feeding. 25 is young, but that even makes it worse! Heck I'm just over 30 and had that problem once. It bugged me for weeks! Now, I was exhausted, both mentally and physically, which I'm now sure was the cause of the episode. Heck I was on vacation when it happened, and I was on vacation for a reason after all. Burnout. It's amazing how it works, or doesn't as the case may be.

It could be that you've had an active sex life, because it may just mean you've hit that point of sexual maturity where it's not jsut about the size of a woman's tits anymore, but rather how sensual and erotic her personality and demeanor are. That's not a bad thing, IMO, just part of a natural progression to maturity.

You should still get checked out, I would say. Heck I went in when I had my issue just to be sure and while I was givien a clean bill of health, I was told that it's not unheard of for men in our age bracket(late 20's - early 30's) to have prostate problems or testicular cancer. Uncommon, dare I say rare, yes but not unheard of. What concerns me is the straightening of the legs part. That might indicate a circulatory problem, but THAT IS JUST A GUESS. I'm not a doctor afterall.

 

[Shankara20]

Do you think that having an active sexual life at an early age can cause this? It started for me when I was 13 or 14 as of what I remember

hmmm, sound sorta like a brag

I'm 58. I have had problems, not had problems, had problems starting aroud 30.
Most of them were emotional - in my head, but messed up how my body responded.

Most men get hard-ons while sleeping. A not-for-sure test is the quality of your wakes-me-up-in-the-morning-hard-on. If it is as hard and as strong as ever the issue may be emotional, if not it may be physical.

Anyway - talk to your Dr. Make him/her take time to discuss your concern.

 

[alrem]

Thanks for all of your replies.

Most men get hard-ons while sleeping. A not-for-sure test is the quality of your wakes-me-up-in-the-morning-hard-on. If it is as hard and as strong as ever the issue may be emotional, if not it may be physical.

Every morning I'm always horny and have a very nice Hard on . But I think every male does it and it confuses me why can't I do it any time I want. Considering that I'm sleeping in different position and I can still get stiff as long as I have just woken up. LOL

I guess, the best thing to do is to get an examination on both physical and psychological.

 

[teacherman570]

The more you think about not being able to stay hard, the more of a problem it will be. I've always been a very anxious person and I'm very nervous when it comes to sex, even though I'm in a long term relationship and my girlfriend and I have a great sex life. I psyche myself out sometimes when I lose my erection. Don't fret about it. If your partner is supportive and helpful the problems will go away. Talk about whats bothering you (if anything) make sure you get your excercise. I'm 26 and I'm dealing with the same issues, and of all the solutions I've tried, talking about with my girlfriend helps the most.

 

[alrem]

The more you think about not being able to stay hard, the more of a problem it will be. I've always been a very anxious person and I'm very nervous when it comes to sex, even though I'm in a long term relationship and my girlfriend and I have a great sex life. I psyche myself out sometimes when I lose my erection. Don't fret about it. If your partner is supportive and helpful the problems will go away. Talk about whats bothering you (if anything) make sure you get your excercise. I'm 26 and I'm dealing with the same issues, and of all the solutions I've tried, talking about with my girlfriend helps the most.

Atleast, it's nice to know that my problems have been heard before.

This happens occationally and it only bothers me because I found it humiliating. Sometimes my girl thinks she's the problem and I don't find her interesting anymore. But were still doing it atleast once a day (mostly every morning because those are the time where I found myself horny ) not like before that were completing three to six rounds a day

 

[lizaveta]

Atleast, it's nice to know that my problems have been heard before.

This happens occationally and it only bothers me because I found it humiliating. Sometimes my girl thinks she's the problem and I don't find her interesting anymore. But were still doing it atleast once a day (mostly every morning because those are the time where I found myself horny ) not like before that were completing three to six rounds a day

Well hell, maybe you're just tired.