Are gay relationships more prone to emotional claustrophobia?

[sexy-girl]

i don't think it's a 100% accepted idea but i've heard many people say gay relationships are very emotionally close and more so than straight relationships


i'm not going to argue if that's true or not but i do think gay relationships can be prone to emotional claustrophobia ... my closest female friend is my girlfriend we live together and all our interests are shared ... when we do have arguments i think it comes from claustrophobia and needing emotional space

sometimes we've found it healthy to have a few days doing separate things or even time apart ... even though we find it very difficult to be apart sometimes its more healthy in the long term (although we won't be doing this for quite a while as i just had a long working holiday abroad )

we've got a very strong relationship and have less bumps and problems than my friends in straight relationships but this is one issue i guess we seem to have to address from time to time


anyway any thoughts has anyone experienced this same sort of thing?

 

[Queersetti]

Do you think that claustrophobia is inherent in homosexuality, or an effect of the social attitude towards it?

 

[sexy-girl]

well i'm not too sure even if its just something thats inherent in me ... or my relationship that's why i started the thread to see if people would agree it's something homosexual couples are prone too

but speaking with just an experience of one gay relationship i would say i think its something thats inherent in homosexuality ... not because of our sexuality but just because it's two people of the same gender in a relationship

but probably social factors come into it as well ... i'm reluctant to say that because living in london and having a great group of friends we don't have to deal with many social pressures against our relationship ... but there are little things like every straight couple i know will have boys nights out or girls nights out


anyway i will have to think about that some more

 

[Queersetti]

well i'm not too sure even if its just something thats inherent in me ... or my relationship that's why i started the thread to see if people would agree it's something homosexual couples are prone too

but speaking with just an experience of one gay relationship i would say i think its something thats inherent in homosexuality ... not because of our sexuality but just because it's two people of the same gender in a relationship

but probably social factors come into it as well ... i'm reluctant to say that because living in london and having a great group of friends we don't have to deal with many social pressures against our relationship ... but there are little things like every straight couple i know will have boys nights out or girls nights out


anyway i will have to think about that some more

I think that in many same sex couples the commonality of interests can lead to an insular situation. I don't think it's healthy for any couple. of any orientation, to focus entirely on each other and have no independent outside interests.

 

[Never]

I think that in many same sex couples the commonality of interests can lead to an insular situation. I don't think it's healthy for any couple. of any orientation, to focus entirely on each other and have no independent outside interests.

That's very true. I've always thought it important that

 

[John Doe]

Well, that was a short thread.

 

[Never]

Hmm, my cat sometimes likes to jump on my back and lick my ear while I'm posting. I think that's what happened to the above post.

I think I was saying something about Queersetti being right.

I also think I said something about lesbian being prone to unhealthy closeness in their relationships. Call it nature or nurture but women seem capable of crushing amounts of emotional togetherness when they feed on one another.

Then again, I am... biased.

 

[sexy-girl]

Well, that was a short thread.

sorry i wasn't sure there was a time limit on threads in the GBLT forum?

but seriously if its a short thread its probably because i answered my own questions

Hmm, my cat sometimes likes to jump on my back and lick my ear while I'm posting. I think that's what happened to the above post.

I think I was saying something about Queersetti being right.

I also think I said something about lesbian being prone to unhealthy closeness in their relationships. Call it nature or nurture but women seem capable of crushing amounts of emotional togetherness when they feed on one another.

Then again, I am... biased.

so maybe it isn't a same sex thing but just a woman thing

do gay men have to deal with the same sort of claustrophobia i wonder?


i agree with queersetti that i'm sure it can happen in all relationships it just maybe seems more prone for our relationship ... i'm sure if we just always went with our heart and did things we wanted we'd end up crushing each other ... sometimes we just have to be careful and stop and think that it might be a good idea to get some space every so often

 

[John Doe]

sorry i wasn't sure there was a time limit on threads in the GBLT forum?

but seriously if its a short thread its probably because i answered my own questions

No, if I thought there were or should be a time limit, then I would not comment on it as it would not seem to be unusual.

And actually, I think becasue Q answered your questions. Fart smeller he is..err, smart feller...it's late, you know what i mean.

so maybe it isn't a same sex thing but just a woman thing

do gay men have to deal with the same sort of claustrophobia i wonder?


i agree with queersetti that i'm sure it can happen in all relationships it just maybe seems more prone for our relationship ... i'm sure if we just always went with our heart and did things we wanted we'd end up crushing each other ... sometimes we just have to be careful and stop and think that it might be a good idea to get some space every so often

If it's more prone in your relationship, then maybe it's just the two of you and not necessarily because it's a homosexual relationship or even two women (although you might be onto something in general with the latter thing).

 

[sexy-girl]

If it's more prone in your relationship, then maybe it's just the two of you and not necessarily because it's a homosexual relationship or even two women (although you might be onto something in general with the latter thing).

that's what i'm trying to find out


and yeah Q is a smart feller

 

[deezire1900]

I thought about this thread all night, and I think I woke up early just to write in here...but...

I lost a relationship to this. She would not give me my alone time and i always tried to convince myself I didn't need it. It wore and wore on us until finally one day I just couldn't take it any more. She and I shut out the world and became best-friends and it was like we didn't care about the rest of the world...oh and we got fat together.

WHen I am single I notice my couple friends dont want to hang out or get together. It is so odd. Like I am a threat to their claustrophobia.

I know my words above are jumbled, but this is a subject I have a hard time getting my head around.

Do couples just like to be with other couples?

 

[Pookie]

I think everyone in relationships need their own space from time to time. I know I do. I think it's probably much easier for most gay couples to become insular and quite dependent on each other though. I think the society the couple lives within can dictate this more than anything. This is probably also true with interracial couples, etc.

 

[Pookie]

... Do couples just like to be with other couples?

Not totally, at least I don't believe so. But birds of a feather ...