I looked through a number of the forums and stories and enjoyed many of them, but I was always looking for thoughts or subjects similar to mine. I didn’t find any so I picked this site to post because if there is any group of people who have learned to live with the cards life has dealt them, it’s here. First off, I consider myself a straight male who has been in a long term heterosexual relationship, but then there are a few qualifiers to the straight male. In my mid teens, a serious illness apparently disrupted my hormone production and likely caused some hiccups in my development as a male. I could be sexually active, but with little beard and body hair. My hips never narrowed despite physical activity and my breasts enlarged slightly. I used to flex my pec muscles thinking that covered it but I still got razzed a lot by other boys. I obviously didn’t need a bra, but I was self conscious about them. When I was discharged from the Army, a doctor doing a physical exam actually measured my breast, I was embarrassed as hell. I’m not sure what all happened to my body during development because a radiology tech once told me my lungs are high and narrow like a woman’s instead of low and broad like a man. By the time I sought help, hormone supplements were not an option because of my families medical history.
Despite qualifying for what Arnold would call a “girly man”, probably more in behavior than appearance, I never considered myself anything but a man and I’ve never been attracted to another man or even curious. I’ve developed a pretty tough skin over the years, but even so there were times when I had to call some macho jerk out for referring to me as a “pussy” or “candy ass”. I usually ended up taking a beating, but hey, a mans got to do what a mans got to do, right. I enjoy the same subjects and activities of most men, but I’m more comfortable with women because I can be more relaxed in who I am. Most of that’s probably in my head, but a woman alcohol abuse counselor said I came across like her female clients. At the same time, I’m strongly attracted to women and I like to experience every inch of their female body with all my senses. I can relate to those who wish to undergo MTF probably because it would get me closer to a female body, but then I’d really have to be a contortionist to enjoy the experience. One of the best places I can think of is being buried in the crotch of a woman. I’m probably one of the few that can be jealous of a Tampax. If I did undergo a gender transfer to a female I’d definitely have to be a lesbian, but then nature’s last joke on me is that I would really make an ugly woman. I can be a reasonably strong male sexually in a relationship, although I would rather have a strong woman partner. Female domination is a turn on, but not a slave boy concept, just as the bottom or weaker member in a sexual relationship. I would enjoy wearing female things not to look “pretty”, but just to further confirm our sexual identity.
OK, can anyone relate to my experiences or suggest another forum? Please respond here or PM me.
Despite qualifying for what Arnold would call a “girly man”, probably more in behavior than appearance, I never considered myself anything but a man and I’ve never been attracted to another man or even curious. I’ve developed a pretty tough skin over the years, but even so there were times when I had to call some macho jerk out for referring to me as a “pussy” or “candy ass”. I usually ended up taking a beating, but hey, a mans got to do what a mans got to do, right. I enjoy the same subjects and activities of most men, but I’m more comfortable with women because I can be more relaxed in who I am. Most of that’s probably in my head, but a woman alcohol abuse counselor said I came across like her female clients. At the same time, I’m strongly attracted to women and I like to experience every inch of their female body with all my senses. I can relate to those who wish to undergo MTF probably because it would get me closer to a female body, but then I’d really have to be a contortionist to enjoy the experience. One of the best places I can think of is being buried in the crotch of a woman. I’m probably one of the few that can be jealous of a Tampax. If I did undergo a gender transfer to a female I’d definitely have to be a lesbian, but then nature’s last joke on me is that I would really make an ugly woman. I can be a reasonably strong male sexually in a relationship, although I would rather have a strong woman partner. Female domination is a turn on, but not a slave boy concept, just as the bottom or weaker member in a sexual relationship. I would enjoy wearing female things not to look “pretty”, but just to further confirm our sexual identity.
OK, can anyone relate to my experiences or suggest another forum? Please respond here or PM me.
