BlackShanglan
Silver-Tongued Papist
- Joined
- Jul 7, 2004
- Posts
- 16,888
In re-reading the Tain lately, I found myself marvelling at the spectacle of 8th-to-12th-century pickup lines enshrined in the wonderful work. Surely there's room here for a thread on literature's best (and worst) "lines." I nominate:
Worst Pickup Line in a Work of Epic Prose and Poetry:
Naisi, son of Usna, on seeing the most beautiful woman who will ever live in Ireland:
"Fair is the heifer that walks by me."
Hmmmm let's all try that: "Nice lookin' heifer there." Sounds like the locals where I live. Has this ever worked for anyone?
Best Pickup Line in a Work of Epic Prose and Poetry:
Cuchulainn, staring at the breasts of his future wife as she embroiders:
"In that green valley I will lay my sword." (And repeats this to every attempt to discourage him.)
And the Special Award for Quick Thinking ...
Ness, a queen: "Hail, druid! What is it a lucky hour for?"
Cathbad the druid, passing, and noticing that the king and all of the male warriors are out of the fort: "It's a lucky hour for a queen to conceive a great son!" And pleasurable conception-related activities ensue.
Shanglan
Worst Pickup Line in a Work of Epic Prose and Poetry:
Naisi, son of Usna, on seeing the most beautiful woman who will ever live in Ireland:
"Fair is the heifer that walks by me."
Hmmmm let's all try that: "Nice lookin' heifer there." Sounds like the locals where I live. Has this ever worked for anyone?
Best Pickup Line in a Work of Epic Prose and Poetry:
Cuchulainn, staring at the breasts of his future wife as she embroiders:
"In that green valley I will lay my sword." (And repeats this to every attempt to discourage him.)
And the Special Award for Quick Thinking ...
Ness, a queen: "Hail, druid! What is it a lucky hour for?"
Cathbad the druid, passing, and noticing that the king and all of the male warriors are out of the fort: "It's a lucky hour for a queen to conceive a great son!" And pleasurable conception-related activities ensue.
Shanglan