Ancient Irish Pick-Up Lines, and Other Literary Flirtations

BlackShanglan

Silver-Tongued Papist
Joined
Jul 7, 2004
Posts
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In re-reading the Tain lately, I found myself marvelling at the spectacle of 8th-to-12th-century pickup lines enshrined in the wonderful work. Surely there's room here for a thread on literature's best (and worst) "lines." I nominate:

Worst Pickup Line in a Work of Epic Prose and Poetry:

Naisi, son of Usna, on seeing the most beautiful woman who will ever live in Ireland:

"Fair is the heifer that walks by me."

Hmmmm let's all try that: "Nice lookin' heifer there." Sounds like the locals where I live. Has this ever worked for anyone?


Best Pickup Line in a Work of Epic Prose and Poetry:

Cuchulainn, staring at the breasts of his future wife as she embroiders:

"In that green valley I will lay my sword." (And repeats this to every attempt to discourage him.)


And the Special Award for Quick Thinking ...

Ness, a queen: "Hail, druid! What is it a lucky hour for?"

Cathbad the druid, passing, and noticing that the king and all of the male warriors are out of the fort: "It's a lucky hour for a queen to conceive a great son!" And pleasurable conception-related activities ensue.



Shanglan
 
i can't think of any off the top of my head. i shall research.

though, there's bound to be something from King Arthur.
 
I can't think any. I'm just here to thank you for posting them. :)
 
From Excaliber:

Merlin: Looking at the cake is like looking at the future, until you've tasted it what do you really know? And then, of course, it's too late.
[Arthur takes a bite]
Merlin: Too late.


Morgana: Your eyes never leave me, Merlin.
Merlin: Can't I acknowledge beauty?
Morgana: Can't you acknowledge... love? Perhaps you ache for what you've never known.
Merlin: Perhaps you lust for what you cannot have.
 
Merlin: Looking at the cake is like looking at the future, until you've tasted it what do you really know? And then, of course, it's too late.
[Arthur takes a bite]
Merlin: Too late.

I love this....from the movie, yes?

The guy who played Merlin was awesome...could convey so damn much with just the lift of an eyebrow, or the expression in his eyes.
 
cloudy said:
Merlin: Looking at the cake is like looking at the future, until you've tasted it what do you really know? And then, of course, it's too late.
[Arthur takes a bite]
Merlin: Too late.

I love this....from the movie, yes?

The guy who played Merlin was awesome...could convey so damn much with just the lift of an eyebrow, or the expression in his eyes.
From the movie, yes. :)

And Nicol Williamson made an outstanding Merlin. :kiss:
 
Those were brilliant, BS. (I hope you don't mind me calling you BS).

Can't think of any from literature, so here's a few from my large stock of failed attempts. I hereby place them in the public domain (yes, in varying degrees of intoxication, I really have used them all)

1 You look like my mother. I fancy my mother.
2 You've got a really nice body. Which is all I care about, really.
3. I'm going through a bad time with my wife right now.
 
BlackShanglan said:
Best Pickup Line in a Work of Epic Prose and Poetry:

Cuchulainn, staring at the breasts of his future wife as she embroiders:

"In that green valley I will lay my sword." (And repeats this to every attempt to discourage him.)
And I'll bet he gets lucky, right?

Beautiful thread, Shanglan. Fifteen minutes earlier and I'd have been googling for more of these.

<aak; collapses onto keyboard at 5:45 a.m.>

zzzzzzz

:eek:
 
Hey sher, it's a beautiful morning! Rise and shine!
 
shereads said:
I've got your morning right here. Bite me.

God, I'm tired of being tired.

Go to sleep, darling. And don't reply to this post. 'morning.
 
Sub Joe said:
(quickly turns off webcam)

No I'm not!

ive got it on film...im saving it for *post*erity
we've now got proof for your carpel tunnel syndrom.
 
Sub Joe said:
Those were brilliant, BS. (I hope you don't mind me calling you BS).


Do feel free; everyone does, and if the shoes fits ... (the farrier's going to nail it to me whether I like it or not).

I enjoyed your lines. I particuarly liked one acquaintances choice of "Hi, I'm not very imaginative. Would you sleep with me anyway?"

Shanglan
 
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