Amazing response to my first chapter - all down hill from now

[leeanna19]

I had an idea for a story the other day and wrote it, around 3000 words in 3 hours. You never know what sort of response you'll get when you do it. I thought the idea was good , but I've been wrong so many times.

https://www.literotica.com/s/seven-years-as-a-wife

It's about a 20 something broke guy , who gets blackmailed into being a rich man's wife.

It has been on for a day and has had nearly 12k views and 45 comments. I have never had a response like that for a story. It was fairly well received on Fictionmania.

My worry now is that its all downhill from here. I have written chapter 2. This has some more background. I never know weather to go straight to the sex or build a background? I know whatever I do I'll never get that sort of response again. I'm reluctant to post it, as I'm sure there will be disappointed.

 

[SimonDoom]

You are psyching yourself out! Don't do that.

My gosh, you only published it yesterday, and it has 45 comments and 12,000 views. And only 3,000 words. That's great. The score is good. Enjoy the success.

Second chapters usually get fewer views, but higher scores. So it doesn't have to be downhill.

I haven't read the story yet, but I will and I'll offer additional thoughts. But just in the abstract here are things to think about for a second chapter:

1. Add a new wrinkle or obstacle to the relationship.

2. Make the second chapter a little longer. Readers tend to give a better reception to stories that are 2 Lit pages (7500 words) or more.

3. In the sex scene, have them try something new and spicy. Make it different.

You should feel very good about how it's done and not worry about how the next chapter will do. If you want to write it, write it.

 

[windar]

Look at it this way-Only one story can be your best story. It could be this one or it could be one you will write 5 years from now. There's no way to know. Even the pros have trouble predicting-publishing houses have rejected books that became huge hits for another publisher and have paid out big advances for books that bombed.

If you like the second chapter, go for it. As for background, I have stories with many chapters of background that have done extremely well. The sex act itself is interesting when you care about the people doing it. If you don't, you're better off reading a sex manual...

 

[leeanna19]

You are psyching yourself out! Don't do that.

My gosh, you only published it yesterday, and it has 45 comments and 12,000 views. And only 3,000 words. That's great. The score is good. Enjoy the success.

Second chapters usually get fewer views, but higher scores. So it doesn't have to be downhill.

I haven't read the story yet, but I will and I'll offer additional thoughts. But just in the abstract here are things to think about for a second chapter:

1. Add a new wrinkle or obstacle to the relationship.

2. Make the second chapter a little longer. Readers tend to give a better reception to stories that are 2 Lit pages (7500 words) or more.

3. In the sex scene, have them try something new and spicy. Make it different.

You should feel very good about how it's done and not worry about how the next chapter will do. If you want to write it, write it.

Thanks. I was going to stop putting stuff on here when I kept getting stuff refused. Turned out I had the word teenanger in a story. I took all my stuff off and I and re-writing some of it. This was a new idea. I just wonder if it the idea they like rather than my story. I have had 5 emails telling me what should happen in the next chapter(mainly the sex). I have written it already, but no sex.

Perhaps incorrectly, I consider this a sex story site. I put stuff on Bigcloset, which is a trans story site. Too much sex never goes down too well there. The problem is

Look at it this way-Only one story can be your best story. It could be this one or it could be one you will write 5 years from now. There's no way to know. Even the pros have trouble predicting-publishing houses have rejected books that became huge hits for another publisher and have paid out big advances for books that bombed.

If you like the second chapter, go for it. As for background, I have stories with many chapters of background that have done extremely well. The sex act itself is interesting when you care about the people doing it. If you don't, you're better off reading a sex manual...

Thanks, I will do that. The main character didn't even consider guys, she/he is enjoying the clothes and is offered 2 million for 7 years service.

 

[Lifestyle66]

It's a story obviously about a GUY who becomes the WIFE of another guy. You got 12,000 views within a day or two, and based on your enthusiastic view of 45 comments, I assume they are mostly positive.

With the trolls hitting the Loving Wives category for anything that's not a BTB story, and even other category stories struggling to get 1,000 to 2,000 views in the first two or three days, your success story says more about the general readers' leanings of LitE.

The readership is shifting.

 

[leeanna19]

It's a story obviously about a GUY who becomes the WIFE of another guy. You got 12,000 views within a day or two, and based on your enthusiastic view of 45 comments, I assume they are mostly positive.

With the trolls hitting the Loving Wives category for anything that's not a BTB story, and even other category stories struggling to get 1,000 to 2,000 views in the first two or three days, your success story says more about the general readers' leanings of LitE.

The readership is shifting.

Yes 45 positive comments, even the ones that moan about the odd mistake. TBH I have never looked at the Loving Wives category.

 

[Lifestyle66]

Yes 45 positive comments, even the ones that moan about the odd mistake. TBH I have never looked at the Loving Wives category.

I used the Loving Wives category as an example, not implying your story was related to it.

From reading the author forum comments here, years ago the LW category, was a friendly and tolerant place to post wife-sharing and swinger stories (as the cat descriptions says.) TODAY, if you post almost anything there about wife/spouse sharing or swingers that is not a BTB (burn the bitch) story, the story gets 1-bombed and hateful comments.

I'm suggesting your story response with its obvious title and one-line description being so well received is another indicator of the shift in the Literotica reader audience. Writers now need to either write to that changed audience, or find where their audience went and follow.

 

[leeanna19]

I used the Loving Wives category as an example, not implying your story was related to it.

From reading the author forum comments here, years ago the LW category, was a friendly and tolerant place to post wife-sharing and swinger stories (as the cat descriptions says.) TODAY, if you post almost anything there about wife/spouse sharing or swingers that is not a BTB (burn the bitch) story, the story gets 1-bombed and hateful comments.

I'm suggesting your story response with its obvious title and one-line description being so well received is another indicator of the shift in the Literotica reader audience. Writers now need to either write to that changed audience, or find where their audience went and follow.

I had heard about the comments on LW. I just had a look at a new story, It had 20k views. 32 comments , many of which were horrible. It really is odd. Lots of moaning about categories.

TBH I get pissed off when some prat says, "You missed an apostrophe out on it's, so I stopped reading". I have seen mistakes by major authors. Why do these trolls bother. It's free porn stories for God's sake!

Do they leave comments on porn video's like " The iighting at 2.30 was sub par, I never saw her clit property, the lux level should have been higher, so I stopped jerking off." I just realized today that you can delete comments like that.

I mainly write trans cd/tv stories. I may give LW a go for a laugh, perhaps I should just re-submit that story and change the guys gender to female and see if I get a shit storm.

 

[gordo12]

I had heard about the comments on LW. I just had a look at a new story, It had 20k views. 32 comments , many of which were horrible. It really is odd. Lots of moaning about categories.

TBH I get pissed off when some prat says, "You missed an apostrophe out on it's, so I stopped reading". I have seen mistakes by major authors. Why do these trolls bother. It's free porn stories for God's sake!

Do they leave comments on porn video's like " The iighting at 2.30 was sub par, I never saw her clit property, the lux level should have been higher, so I stopped jerking off." I just realized today that you can delete comments like that.

I mainly write trans cd/tv stories. I may give LW a go for a laugh, perhaps I should just re-submit that story and change the guys gender to female and see if I get a shit storm.

My suggestion is to focus on where you're getting good results. Do you really need the trolls in LW following you back and starting in on your genre?

 

[windar]

Do they leave comments on porn video's like " The iighting at 2.30 was sub par, I never saw her clit property, the lux level should have been higher, so I stopped jerking off."

I never watch porn so I wouldn't know, but friends who visit porn sites tell me that they have seen such comments.

Bad lighting will have greater impact on a video than a few typos do on a story so that isn't such an unreasonable comment if you honestly can't see the action. Besides, those porn films are professional and should be held to some standards. Trashing stories on a free site is a bit like complaining about the food down at the soup kitchen...

 

[LongDraw]

I never watch porn so I wouldn't know, but friends who visit porn sites tell me that they have seen such comments.

Bad lighting will have greater impact on a video than a few typos do on a story so that isn't such an unreasonable comment if you honestly can't see the action. Besides, those porn films are professional and should be held to some standards. Trashing stories on a free site is a bit like complaining about the food down at the soup kitchen...

I completely agree, especially with me publishing my VY novel in the LW category. I didn't know when I first published it the reputation of that category, but honestly I now feel that if I get close to or above a 4 on my publishings there, then I've probably pleased the readers that really matter. And if someone is going to stop reading after the first paragraph or the first page because they weren't able to get themselves off in the first couple minutes, then it is their loss TBH. The sex scenes increase in frequency and kinkiness and variety the further you read on in the novel. Patience is a virtue.

Okay, so after reading the story. A few remarks. I noticed probably about 20 spelling errors, some attributed to the use of the wrong word that phonetically sounds identical, so I could see this as a speech-to-text conversion issue. Another thing is that Mark is portrayed as a hardline heterosexual man, even when his lesbian friend suggests he could easily be bi, yet he seems all too eager to give up his heterosexual nature. Also, as a strictly hetero guy myself (don't judge), I would have to demand far more than a couple million to live the gay lifestyle, especially if it involved surgeries to alter my body, we're talking like a billion, no less.

Now I don't want to give you the impression that your story is crap. Infact I think it shows promise, and if you develop it more completely could prove to be an excellent story to be used as an example for other authors here.

 

[windar]

I haven't read your published story yet, though I plan to as soon as I let my dogs out after this response. If I like what I read though, I could possibly be looking for a co-author on the planned sequel in the VY series.

Uhhh, let's see....I don't know which published story you're referring to, since I have dozens,..I already write with a co-author and am very happy with the results...I gave you feedback at your request on your first chapters and got no response...I have a commission that I plan to begin working on soon... and I made a promise not to post any more stories here which I intend to keep so...I will have to regretfully decline...

 

[Lifestyle66]

I had heard about the comments on LW. I just had a look at a new story, It had 20k views. 32 comments , many of which were horrible. It really is odd. Lots of moaning about categories.

TBH I get pissed off when some prat says, "You missed an apostrophe out on it's, so I stopped reading". I have seen mistakes by major authors. Why do these trolls bother. It's free porn stories for God's sake!

Do they leave comments on porn video's like " The iighting at 2.30 was sub par, I never saw her clit property, the lux level should have been higher, so I stopped jerking off." I just realized today that you can delete comments like that.

I mainly write trans cd/tv stories. I may give LW a go for a laugh, perhaps I should just re-submit that story and change the guys gender to female and see if I get a shit storm.

You've read just one story in LW? That's the tip if the iceberg.

The comments on a wife sharing/mutually consensual swinger story will mostly include words like "cuckhold", "wimp", "slut", "whore", "Why bother being married", "divorce coming soon", etc.

IMO, those who HATE such swinger situations essentially see marriage as a contract to OWN the spouse's body forever. "I promise to love, honor, and be celibate forever if you lose all interest or ability to have sex." It's like consensual slavery.

In my stories, I tried to create a couple who enjoyed sex. And as they grew older with kids out of the house, they started enjoying sex with others, together, as if putting on a porn show for each other. But, when those originally posted to LW, the comments were mostly hateful. So, I re-wrote those and took down the earlier versions, posting to other categories such as Erotic Couplings and Group Sex. The ratings are higher. But I still get some of those negative comments, just not as many.

In my story for the Pink Orchid challenge 'Her Bucket List: Strip Club' posted in Mature, the first comment is "The destiny of becoming a gutter slut, married to a pimp. Thank goodness she got that advice."

 

[Lifestyle66]

I mainly write trans cd/tv stories. I may give LW a go for a laugh, perhaps I should just re-submit that story and change the guys gender to female and see if I get a shit storm.

My suggestion is to focus on where you're getting good results. Do you really need the trolls in LW following you back and starting in on your genre?

Gordo12 has some good advice there.

Be careful posting to LW or even pissing off an author here in the forums. Some WILL go to your story list and open each one to give it a 1 rating and leave a hateful comment.

Within a day of getting into a forum disagreement, I found each of my stories I was tracking ratings on to get another one rate, and in those six or seven stories, the rating was posted in rapid succession, so they weren't even speed reading the story.

 

[LongDraw]

Sorry, was referring to OP's story.

 

[leeanna19]

My suggestion is to focus on where you're getting good results. Do you really need the trolls in LW following you back and starting in on your genre?

Good point!

 

[gordo12]

Good point!

Let's take it a step further. Somebody posted about 20,000 views and 32 comments on an LW story. I don't know which one but I'll make some assumptions. 20 of those comments were negative. (helps with the math) The rest were positive or ok.

20 comments are 1/10 of 1% of the traffic. 99.9% said nothing or posted positively. 19,980 people read that story and said nothing bad. Talk about getting readers. Admittedly, not everyone read the story. They clicked on and off without saying anything. More importantly, they acted like adults. 19,980 of them acted like ADULTS.

When it comes to LW I have failed to understand why so many authors here allow it to live rent-free in their heads. They let a few wackjobs stampede them for the exit.

I'll return the thread now before it runs off track. Sorry!

 

[leeanna19]

Let's take it a step further. Somebody posted about 20,000 views and 32 comments on an LW story. I don't know which one but I'll make some assumptions. 20 of those comments were negative. (helps with the math) The rest were positive or ok.

20 comments are 1/10 of 1% of the traffic. 99.9% said nothing or posted positively. 19,980 people read that story and said nothing bad. Talk about getting readers. Admittedly, not everyone read the story. They clicked on and off without saying anything. More importantly, they acted like adults. 19,980 of them acted like ADULTS.

When it comes to LW I have failed to understand why so many authors here allow it to live rent-free in their heads. They let a few wackjobs stampede them for the exit.

I'll return the thread now before it runs off track. Sorry!

I had a quick look at Wheelchair girl. A very good, original story. Yet I noticed you had criticism about genetics and salt etc. I don't believe some readers. They must feel like they are professional critics. If I don't like a story I just don't rate it or comment. That's one thing about Bigcloset, you can vote, but can't comment without you ID. most negative stuff is anonymous on here.

 

[gordo12]

Thank you for the compliment. The salt thing I have no explanation for. It didn't show up anywhere I searched, although it seems somewhat logical. The genetics were half right and half wrong. But I don't mind comments like that. They made me research and learn. First thing I learned was when you put a story away for a year, make sure you READ your notes before resuming!