After Earth: another shamalamalaman mess

[JinSun]

It was probably one of the worst movies I have EVER had displeasure of watching.

Shamalamananasdflb whatever the fuck his name is had one good movie: The sixth sense. Everything after that has been pure horse shit, so why the hell do they keep hiring him back?

Will Smith's son can't act for shit, and this was probably the most cliched, predictable movies I've ever seen. Period.

 

[Aquagal]

I just watched Chupacabra vs The Alamo, starring Erik Estrada. I'm sure this was far worse.

 

[JinSun]

I just watched Chupacabra vs The Alamo, starring Erik Estrada. I'm sure this was far worse.

I just looked it up on IMDb. Looks like shit.

 

[lovecraft68]

I think he had more than one.

Unbreakable was pretty good.

But agreed after that, shit went downhill.

I still to this day think the Village was one of the worst films I've ever seen.

 

[Aquagal]

1/2 a star

 

[JinSun]

1/2 a star

-1/2 a star.

 

[lovecraft68]

Aside from it being M night whatever's latest bomb, Will Smith's(Who I generally like) attempt to shove his kid down our throats is getting old.

I know that with parents like Will and Jada the kid is a pedigree, but well, sometimes shit skips a generation.

 

[Aquagal]

-1/2 a star.

I gave it 1/2 because I laughed when the girl stuck a baby Chupacabra in the microwave and it blew up. And I used to have a crush on Erik Estrada. He's more C.H.U.N.K. than C.H.I.P. now.

 

[JinSun]

Aside from it being M night whatever's latest bomb, Will Smith's(Who I generally like) attempt to shove his kid down our throats is getting old.

I know that with parents like Will and Jada the kid is a pedigree, but well, sometimes shit skips a generation.

Exactly! Except what they don't get is that it doesn't work like that.

Pursuit of Happiness: I went home trying not to kill myself.

The Karate Kid: Is that your definition of acting?

Will and his half-baked wife are trying to build a nice comfy career for their son, however they clearly don't realize that no matter how many "supposed" blockbusters they put him in, he will never be a good actor.

 

[JinSun]

I gave it 1/2 because I laughed when the girl stuck a baby Chupacabra in the microwave and it blew up. And I used to have a crush on Erik Estrada. He's more C.H.U.N.K. than C.H.I.P. now.

Haha, Estrada? I hadn't even heard of him until this.

 

[Aquagal]

Haha, Estrada? I hadn't even heard of him until this.

You must be quite young, he was a hottie in the 70's.

 

[JinSun]

You must be quite young, he was a hottie in the 70's.

Ah and I am.

 

[Aquagal]

Ah and I am.

Were you even born by the 70's?

I saw After Earth previews and it did nothing for me so...this confirms my must need not see.

 

[Sean Renaud]

If you thought the Village was one of the worst films you've ever seen you must have done yourself the favorof skipping Lady in the Water and the Last Airbender..

and the New Karate Kid is just fine. If you hate that movie you just hate fun.

 

[JinSun]

Were you even born by the 70's?

I saw After Earth previews and it did nothing for me so...this confirms my must need not see.

Nope, early 90s.

I was really bored last night, and I already knew it wouldn't be a good movie, so I went with a friend of mine who I know likes to make fun of movies as we watch them, but it turned out so much worse than we'd thought it would be.

 

[lovecraft68]

I gave it 1/2 because I laughed when the girl stuck a baby Chupacabra in the microwave and it blew up. And I used to have a crush on Erik Estrada. He's more C.H.U.N.K. than C.H.I.P. now.

I wish I could remember the name of it, but back in the day some friends and I would get together every Sunday, go to the video store(remember them?) and see who could rent the cheesiest horror movie.

I picked this lame ass possession movie and lo and behold, Estrada shows up as the priest.

After Chips he did not do much in the US but was huge in South America on soap operas

 

[lovecraft68]

Exactly! Except what they don't get is that it doesn't work like that.

Pursuit of Happiness: I went home trying not to kill myself.

The Karate Kid: Is that your definition of acting?

Will and his half-baked wife are trying to build a nice comfy career for there son, however they clearly don't realize that no matter how many "supposed" blockbusters they put him in, he will never be a good actor.

I feel kind of bad saying it (because he killed himself not too long ago) but this reminds me of Stallone's putting his son in a couple of his movies to try to get him to "catch" I did think he did a good job in "Daylight" unlike Smith the younger who looks more and more lost.

 

[Aquagal]

I wish I could remember the name of it, but back in the day some friends and I would get together every Sunday, go to the video store(remember them?) and see who could rent the cheesiest horror movie.

I picked this lame ass possession movie and lo and behold, Estrada shows up as the priest.

After Chips he did not do much in the US but was huge in South America on soap operas

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0100672/

 

[JinSun]

I feel kind of bad saying it (because he killed himself not too long ago) but this reminds me of Stallone's putting his son in a couple of his movies to try to get him to "catch" I did think he did a good job in "Daylight" unlike Smith the younger who looks more and more lost.

Eerie comparison.

 

[lovecraft68]

If you thought the Village was one of the worst films you've ever seen you must have done yourself the favorof skipping Lady in the Water and the Last Airbender..

and the New Karate Kid is just fine. If you hate that movie you just hate fun.

I did do myself that favor. After Village I saw one more and can;t even recall the name "The Happening?" and oh, jeez.

I may be a masochist, but there are limits to what I can endure.

as for the new KK? I think it was just a case of it being the third remake(remember they re made it with a girl even though I think they called it part 4)

 

[lovecraft68]

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0100672/

Thank you! Wow, I used to live for low budget cheese like that. and like many of those schlock type movies it did have its charm.

The problem for Estrada was that he had one of those roles in chips that is what he will always be known for.

I saw him show up and I'm like "It's Ponch!"

 

[IrezumiKiss]

Something tells me that if I don't see After Earth nice and loud on a big screen, it won't be worth watching at home come September.

But straight up...is it worse than either of these:

because after seeing those wastes of ability, talent and resource in the theaters, they've become my personal negative benchmark for watchability and tolerance, even if the flick is only substandard. It's why I didn't feel too crappy after paying to see Skyline. At least with sci-fi, you can half-assedly cruise on effects/action/battle-sequence-porn over shitty writing.

But due to the plethora of dud reviews, I might have to regulate AE to "sneakquel" status in order to satisfy my curiosity.

 

[Worm]

What was the one where the wind was killing people and it was the trees and the grass or something. The Village was Citizen Kane compared to that one.

 

[JinSun]

Something tells me that if I don't see After Earth nice and loud on a big screen, it won't be worth watching at home come September.

But straight up...is it worse than either of these:

because after seeing those wastes of ability, talent and resource in the theaters, they've become my personal negative benchmark for watchability and tolerance, even if the flick is only substandard. It's why I didn't feel too crappy after paying to see Skyline. At least with sci-fi, you can half-assedly cruise on effects/action/battle-sequence-porn over shitty writing.

But due to the plethora of dud reviews, I might have to regulate AE to "sneakquel" status in order to satisfy my curiosity.

No, it's on a whole new level of shitty. Actually, maybe they're the same.

 

[lovecraft68]

What was the one where the wind was killing people and it was the trees and the grass or something. The Village was Citizen Kane compared to that one.

That's the one I was trying to think of. I rented it and shut it off half way through.