hairybeanbag
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mightyquinn2112 said:
Go ahead and take care of business... I've got it on good authority that your wife is getting laid regularly elsewhere.
advice on affair
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Go ahead and take care of business... I've got it on good authority that your wife is getting laid regularly elsewhere.
Bob Peale
angeli ribelli
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mightyquinn2112 said:
Simple.
Don't.
What you won't find here is a primer on how to cheat; this isn't a fictitious story or a Lifetime movie - your question has very real consequences.
mightyquinn2112 said:
So then man up and end your current relationship before you screw up three other people's lives because of your immaturity.
Sounds like you never should have been married - fine to date, but it sounds like you're not capable of committment if you're always worried about what you might have left on the table.
And if the other woman is willing to cheat on her husband with you, you deserve each other.
bad kitty
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I second Liz, and raise her a: Talk with your wife. Lay it out on the table (not about her friend, but about being unhappy) and from there you both can decide if you want to continue the marriage or not. Don't ever sneak around and cheat because you damn the marriage right then and there. Especially if there are kids involved, DON'T DO IT! Thinking about it is natural. Confronting a problem (unhappy in marriage) is always the best course of action. Deal with one relationship before trying to move into another.
MaggieH
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mightyquinn2112 said:
No, I think I will, but you knew I would. Of course it's refreshing. It's new, it's uncertain, it's exciting. It's not your wife.
BTW, don't you think your wife would like experiencing something new too? But, so far as we know, she doesn't pursue those options because she's committed to your marriage. Show her some respect.
mightyquinn2112 said:
Nope, no least risky method, and no backpedaling. Make a decision about your marriage. And if your marriage isn't what you want, either fix it or get out of it. If you get out of it, then look for a new woman. One who isn't married.
If it’s monotonous, find a way to spice it up. If it’s argumentative, get marriage counseling. That is if you *really* want to save your marriage.
Of course this chic is refreshing, perky, bubbly and sexy. She hasn’t had to deal with your boring ass all this time like your wife has. If you want you wife to be that way, you begin treating her like she is something sexy and special and see how she responds. Plus, I thought you said you liked this chic’s husband!
See if they’ll go for spouse trading. If not, don’t do it. Bad idea. Besides if you leave your wife for this chic, who’s to say she won’t cheat on you once you become boring. Marriage isn’t a destination, it’s a journey. A commitment. It’s up to you and your spouse to make it the best it can be. If you aren’t doing that, then it’s your own damn fault.
1hotbabe
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mightyquinn2112 said:
All marriages get monotonous and argumentative if you don't actively take steps to keep it otherwise. People grow complacent... do something about it.
Anything "new" is always more exciting! Instead of reaching outside your marriage why don't you reach out to your wife and have a discussion about what's wrong with your marriage and how the two of you can fix it? If that's not feasible then divorce and settle this relationship first before seeking out other relationships. It is fairer to all concerned. Instead of leaving the safety net of your marriage intact. So, that if things don't work out as planned and you don't get caught you have the "comfort" of your staid life to go back to.
There isn't a least risky method, risk is involved. Do you want to chance it or not? But, remember this if she will cheat with you, she will cheat on you. Deal with the relationship you are in. Revive it or end it. If you end it you can reach out anywhere you wish.
CuteKittyCat
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Having an affair is the cowards way out. Married people who have affairs disgust me and so do those who have affairs with married people!!!!
Work at your marriage and try to make it better (why get married in the first place if youre going to stumble at the first hurdle???) and if you cant control your 'urges' (
) stay away from this woman.
Its a simple decision if your a decent person.
Work at your marriage and try to make it better (why get married in the first place if youre going to stumble at the first hurdle???) and if you cant control your 'urges' (
) stay away from this woman. Its a simple decision if your a decent person.
snasu
Literotica Guru
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go to the How to section under Erotic Stories.mightyquinn2112 said:
http://www.literotica.com/stories/index.php
I'm sure if you do a search in there - there is something that tells you "how to cheat on your wife and not get caught".
However, it's probably best to invite this couple over for supper or something and while your wife and her husband are in the next room, just tell your wife's friend that you're bored in your marriage, she is sending you signals that she is into you and you would really like to start up an affair with her.
Could she meet you at a hotel sometime next week?
It would definitely clear up any confusion that might exist, on so many levels.
rosco rathbone
1. f3e5 2. g4??
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mightyquinn2112 said:
The least risky method is to fuck someone who is not a friend of your wife. That's a bad idea if you are trying to keep the whole thing secret.
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Hisbabydoll26
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mightyquinn2112 said:
Not that you should have a list in the first place but b should be a and a should be b. Hope your wife finds out what an ass you are before you hurt her too badly.
MNGuy
I put the Ick in Erotic
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mightyquinn2112 said:
You've only been married two years and you have the seven year itch? Wasn't your wife once refreshing? Didn' t you once see these things in your wife that you now see in her best friend? The key is to keep the marriage fresh, and it takes work.
Do you try to stay refreshing to your wife, or have you both developed routines? Break the routines, and start revitalizing your marriage. Why is your marriage argumentative? If its over minor things, you two need to find a way to fix it, but, if it is major, violent, or such, then maybe you should think abut ending the marriage. But in that case you would be ending the marriage because it isn't working, not because you think the grass is greener elsewhere.
As far as wanting to reach out, and backpedal if you are wrong, everyone would like that. Kind of a rewind button for life. Oops! I screwed up, rewind a couple of weeks and that didn't happen.
Comshaw
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mightyquinn2112 said:
You want to know what the least risky method of reaching out to this girl is?
Simple. Theres one method that's almost fool proof, fairly easy, there's no way you'll ever be caught by your wife and if you're serious about staying married, it will make the rest of your time together fun and exciting.
What is it? Well first let me pose a question or two for you to answer.
I get from your post that you're a bit bored, a bit fed up with being married, that right?
Have you ever really stopped and looked at your own motives for this? Is it the excitement of sex with someone new? Or the fact that you don't really want to be married any more?
If it's the latter, the first thing you need to do is take a long honest look at whether or not you still want to be married. If not DO NOT FUCKUP YOUR WIFES LIFE BY PLAYING GAMES. If that's what you want, then get the hell out and let her heal and get on with her life.
If it's the former, then go to my copy righted (I wished) plan below.
Ask permission from your wife! Tada!
Actually if you do this and get permission, you never have to worry about being caught, because she already knows AND
you will have more sex for the rest of your life then most people ever dream of.
If you're honest, treat her like the equal she is, and can give as well as take, you have a life time of fun in front of you.
But be aware, up front, that if you ask for and receive permission to boff her friend, sometime it's going to go the other way. If it goes this way, sometime, someplace, she's going to be asking permission to boff some guy.
Everything comes with a cost, with consequences. Which one you choose depends on your character and what you're willing to pay. Choose wisely.
Comshaw
Allow your wife some dignity. If you love her at all.
If you want out then get out. To cheat is an awful thing to do,
worse yet with a friend. The betrayal is doubly so and the hurt
unimaginable.
In the end though, none of us wear your shoes and you'll
do whatever you want regardless of anything that's said here.
If you want out then get out. To cheat is an awful thing to do,
worse yet with a friend. The betrayal is doubly so and the hurt
unimaginable.
In the end though, none of us wear your shoes and you'll
do whatever you want regardless of anything that's said here.
mightyquinn2112
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black and white
all the responses are black and white....from what i saw, there appear to be only two options (a) divorce, and play (b) don't fuck up, work and save the marriage. No disrespect to y'all, but I was able to figure these two alternatives by myself. I was rather hoping for a nuanced and thoughtful way to address the situation.
The facts remain the same. I love my wife...but I apparently like this this other girl as well - who happens to be my wife's close friend. Firstly, can't a guy like/love two women? I can safely say, Yes. The tricky thing is - a guy is not allowed to have two relationships unless it is open.....else it is cheating.
The interesting questions are:
- What if this girl and I are denying ourselves when we may truly belong to each other?
- And if above does not turn out to be the case, why do I have to jeopardize my marriage and tell my wife BEFORE I find out?
- What if this turns out to be an infatuation...why tell my wife and cause needless hurt?
All I am saying is...there is a middle road where I can explore feelings (maybe not physically) and test how it goes, and then tackle the marriage situation. By having thoughts of another woman, and living with my wife, in itself, is gross injustice to both women, and myself.
all the responses are black and white....from what i saw, there appear to be only two options (a) divorce, and play (b) don't fuck up, work and save the marriage. No disrespect to y'all, but I was able to figure these two alternatives by myself. I was rather hoping for a nuanced and thoughtful way to address the situation.
The facts remain the same. I love my wife...but I apparently like this this other girl as well - who happens to be my wife's close friend. Firstly, can't a guy like/love two women? I can safely say, Yes. The tricky thing is - a guy is not allowed to have two relationships unless it is open.....else it is cheating.
The interesting questions are:
- What if this girl and I are denying ourselves when we may truly belong to each other?
- And if above does not turn out to be the case, why do I have to jeopardize my marriage and tell my wife BEFORE I find out?
- What if this turns out to be an infatuation...why tell my wife and cause needless hurt?
All I am saying is...there is a middle road where I can explore feelings (maybe not physically) and test how it goes, and then tackle the marriage situation. By having thoughts of another woman, and living with my wife, in itself, is gross injustice to both women, and myself.
Eilan
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The thread title is a bit misleading. "Advice on affair?" I think you meant "Validation of affair." It sounds like you want to have your cake and eat it too.mightyquinn2112 said:
Try The Playground. You're more likely to find the validation you seek there.
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Jedi_Princess
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what is the point in asking us then? either we agree with you and you feel good about it or we don't agree so you ignore what we say and do it anyway.
so yeah, go right ahead. fuck your wifes friend and fuck yourself.
asshat
so yeah, go right ahead. fuck your wifes friend and fuck yourself.
asshat
sincerely_helene
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mightyquinn2112 said:
You want to make sure you have a back-up in place before you leave your wife, in other words? Otherwise, you will just stay in the relationship until something a little less risk free comes along?
Yeah, don't, as you say "shortchange yourself for the rest of your life," do you and your wife both a favor and leave now with or without your back-up.
Sorry if that sounds nasty, but if I had a husband who was staying in the relationship just for the reasons you have stated, I'd just as soon him fuck off. She deserves equal opportunity to move on with her life, and find the one she was meant to be with too, yanno.
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SweetErika
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How is that "tricky"? If you wanted to have multiple relationships, why did you agree to get married and live monogamously? Why stay in a monogamous relationship when that's clearly not what you want?mightyquinn2112 said:
If you truly belong together, wouldn't it be helpful to found a relationship on honesty? You're going to have to get out of your marriage somehow, or get your wife to agree to polyamory, so why not start now so you can explore your options and see if you can find a woman you truly belong with?
Well, because you agreed to be honest and monogamous before getting married. I'm all for open relationships, but that's something you have to agree on if you don't want to jeopardize your current relationship.
And fucking around behind her back WON'T cause her needless hurt? This is her friend - her MARRIED friend- don't fool yourself, she WILL find out.
Yes, the middle ground might be an open relationship. How about approaching her in trying soft swinging at first? Other than honesty, there's NO middle ground here.
