Abortion

[DreamKeeper]

Have you or your partner ever have an abortion?



on going follow up on HT/c boards

 

[myinnerslut]

i have never had an abortion becuase i have never been pregnant.

 

[catalina_francisco]

Why?

Catalina

 

[myinnerslut]

...

as pointed out by everyone else, this is a rather unsual and personal lthing to ask

 

[CutieMouse]

*****

 

[catalina_francisco]

why to the OP or why to which of my points?

why would i abort? becuase i refuse to bring a child into this world with serious and potetailly fatal birth defects. i was very upset when i found this out, as untill that point i had never decided on what to do in that case.

why am i not planning on children yet? i want to be married before i have children, i want to be out of school before i am married. at 19, im not ready yet.

Why to the OP...not sure what the relevance is here when it is not BDSM and from someone we do not know.

Catalina

 

[graceanne]

I gotta wonder (a) how is this any of your business and (b) why do you care?

 

[Toa_lin]

I gotta wonder (a) how is this any of your business and (b) why do you care?

agreed

Why to the OP...not sure what the relevance is here when it is not BDSM and from someone we do not know.

Catalina

once again, I must agree, if it was from someone who frequents here alot, I might b abit more udnerstanding, but then graceanne's comment takes in effect so... I really choose not to answer.

 

[graceanne]

agreed



once again, I must agree, if it was from someone who frequents here alot, I might b abit more udnerstanding, but then graceanne's comment takes in effect so... I really choose not to answer.

Even if it was from someone I know, I probably woudln't answer. That's a really personal question for one thing, and it's also a huge can of worms. I think that we've got a troll who's trying to get a huge abortion debate going, and have everyone at eachothers throats. I refuse to participate, and I would refuse to participate in something like that even if I knew the person.

 

[Toa_lin]

Even if it was from someone I know, I probably woudln't answer. That's a really personal question for one thing, and it's also a huge can of worms. I think that we've got a troll who's trying to get a huge abortion debate going, and have everyone at eachothers throats. I refuse to participate, and I would refuse to participate in something like that even if I knew the person.

Yes I agree with yuo on that fact, which is why i said I'd understand better, but would go back to your oppinion u stated erlier.

 

[graceanne]

Yes I agree with yuo on that fact, which is why i said I'd understand better, but would go back to your oppinion u stated erlier.

Yeah, if they were regulars who're known to not be trolls, I probably would just want to know why. I still wouldn't participate in the conversation, though.

 

[Toa_lin]

Yeah, if they were regulars who're known to not be trolls, I probably would just want to know why. I still wouldn't participate in the conversation, though.

true, and most of the regulars here I can't see asking anyway, if they were facing having it, i can see some of them MAYBE asking if anyone has had an expereince and sharing there thoughts and/or suggestions via PM, but that's about it.

 

[graceanne]

true, and most of the regulars here I can't see asking anyway, if they were facing having it, i can see some of them MAYBE asking if anyone has had an expereince and sharing there thoughts and/or suggestions via PM, but that's about it.

Exactly. I know quite a few people here on lit, and some of them might want to talk to me, or someone else, if they were contemplating an abortion, but they sure woudln't make it a public conversation.

 

[Penalt]

I notice two things that raise eyebrows on this.....

1) The poster has less than 10 posts overall.

2) The poster has started this thread in multiple areas.

Considering the touchiness of the topic I decline to reply until I see more from this poster. Especially why such a topic would be here as I don't see how it relates to BDSM either.

 

[BiBunny]

No, my partner has never had an abortion.

Mostly because he's a man.

Makes me think of the Life of Brian, when Stan tells the other members of the PFJ that he wants to be a woman. He says he'd like to be called Loretta, and he wants to have babies. The others ask how he's going to have babies, and an argument ensues. Finally, Judith says, "Ok, we all agree that he can't have babies, but we'll fight for his RIGHT to have babies."

Ok, maybe I'm the only non-sequitor idiot here.

 

[Toa_lin]

hehe, no, I've seen that movie, an when u mention your partner is a guy, i am reminded of it as well.

 

[SweetErika]

There was a thread in HT proper earlier, asking a bunch of questions. It might have been moved to the GB. In it, the OP said s/he created an alt for this, so that's why they're new and have no other posts. I don't understand why s/he needs so many threads on the topic, and think it was cowardly to create an alt, especially since the OP hasn't shared any personal info on the threads themselves.

Furthermore, they told people they could share publically or privately, under an alt if they felt more comfortable, and the OP would keep everything confidential, on and off of Lit. Personally, I'd never trust someone I didn't have a good feel for with any info like this, and certainly not a person who felt they needed to create an alt to discuss.

Anyway, about a third of American women have an abortion by the time they're 45 (source) , so this is hardly an uncommon thing. I think it's too bad that it's such a controversial and 'shameful' issue/act that people feel they can't be open and get support in a wonderful community like this. I've yet to hear ANYONE say they think abortion is a great thing or easy; it's often just the unselfish and/or necessary choice, so it makes me sad to see so much guilt, shame and animosity surrounfing it.

 

[Mamid]

why the fuck should you give a flying crap about whether or not someone, or their partner, has had an abortion here?!

Medical issues like that belong to the person they belong to and are PRIVATE not public.

Go fuck yourself with the toad you rode in on.

 

[m wisdom]

I have never had an abortion
If I ever get pregnant I will get one, because it would seriously freak me out to be pregnant

 

[lil_slave_rose]

why the fuck should you give a flying crap about whether or not someone, or their partner, has had an abortion here?!

Medical issues like that belong to the person they belong to and are PRIVATE not public.

Go fuck yourself with the toad you rode in on.

by reading the other threads in which this OP started up the same conversations in different parts of Lit, i do believe this person is looking for support of some kind, my feeling is they or their partner had an abortion and are needing to feel the 'it's ok' thing and that's why they are asking if anyone else has shared the experience. does it belong in the BDSM forum..umm..i think not, and do i think that it's something that should be shared..sadly enough no, because of the flaming and such that would go on by those who do not agree with their choices. i don't understand why start this topic here but i think they were starting it everywhere on Lit and well we are part of Lit so they started it here too......i do KIND OF understand why they used and alt. name to post the question as i said, no one likes to be flamed or have their respect revoked by people they like because of a choice they made. anyway, i'm rambling and not really saying much so i'll end my post here..it looks like a lot of people voted though, they just didn't write down their thoughts

 

[MasterPhoenix]

I voted no, but do wonder what the hell the motives of the op were...

 

[DreamKeeper]

Yes. I'm an alt of a person that has frequented here and the other forums for over five years. It wasn't cowardice, it was more sort of protection. No one should be flamed and questioned if they don't want to answer.
I created the alt because how can a person ask such personal things of people without going through the situation themselves and have any relevance (to other people) in the conversation? I asked a few things I didn't understand or was curious about in an anonymous way and asked that if others feel comfortable they can share publically, privately, or even as an alt - to correct wrong infornmation, to get anything off their chest they need to, to debate, to comfort and be comforted in a trying time.
We are here for eachother - through so so many things, and we are here for strangers in nearly the same exact ways. Why make this topic at hand any different?


The polls were created for awareness that the thread exists. It was a yes/no question with zero promp on the poll page to say who they were or not. It was to highlight SweetErika's points exactly- just to make statistics more real, and give the stats a home face instead of "...of America, of the world..."
I posted a 'follow up' link so that if people wanted to - they could.
Zero pressure.

Answer if you want - Ignore it if you want.
I apologise if people took offense and felt like they had to answer - that was not my intention. Alot goes ignored as it is on Lit - relevant issues, silly games between members, flame wars, trolling... and some of the same things get hit with heat.

As for messaging this screen name with personal accounts - I just tossed that out there as an idea. Take it or leave it. As I said before, giving my word and making promises to privacy may not seem sincere - but for what it is worth, I tell no lies, this topic is "too big" for lack of better words to not treat it with up most respect.

It is a choice (legally in most places) for now - agree with it or not; it exists, and it has for a good deal of time. "Naturally" and medically.

And that is what I offered people, a choice - believe me, or not.


Does it belong here?

In reality, yes, I suppose it would belong in the GB. But truly... it wouldn't stand a chance there. Does it belong on the HT, no, not exactly - it isn't a true HT. Playground? no. Personals? no. Photos and Roleplaying? no. It is a cafe discussion at best - and the HT and BDSM boards have a cafe. I posted it 'everywhere' so that people who don't cross board post see it. If the thread gets shuffled under the rugs, then fine. At least it is there. People come to Lit for millions of reasons - mostly though, they look for infornmation, guidance, friendship and to feel normal somewhere no matter their kink, world view, or to know they aren't alone in whatever crisis (big or small) they are having...

 

[graceanne]

I have never had an abortion
If I ever get pregnant I will get one, because it would seriously freak me out to be pregnant

hehe I don't think you'd be the only one to be freaked out.

 

[shy slave]

I really don't like the way you have phrased this question in so many different ways across Lit.

I fail to see why a debate of this is needed. I am suspicious of your stated need to have an alt just to ask this question.

It makes me briefly wonder are you contemplating abortion or is your SO contemplating it.

Whichever, I don't care enough about people who hide behind alts to give it any more thought.

I will put you on ignore that way I save myself a great deal of irritation from someone who does not not respect anyone at Lit enough to post under their usual name.

 

[DreamKeeper]

I really don't like the way you have phrased this question in so many different ways across Lit.

I fail to see why a debate of this is needed. I am suspicious of your stated need to have an alt just to ask this question.

It makes me briefly wonder are you contemplating abortion or is your SO contemplating it.

Whichever, I don't care enough about people who hide behind alts to give it any more thought.

I will put you on ignore that way I save myself a great deal of irritation from someone who does not not respect anyone at Lit enough to post under their usual name.

... if you can still se this. I am sorry you feel that way. If you read into what I am saying about people feel the need for protection - I being a person needing no protection and doing it anyway to show others "its ok, talk about whatever you want to; in anyway you are able to".
I'm not contemplating anything - just providing a place so that others can. I come and go from Lit, I use it as a tool now instead of a place to 'always be' because it stopped giving me new infornmation.
I grew tired of the flame wars and the 'same old topics' so... it came to me finally after a friend of mine was put in the situation of having to sit on this fence... I of course dashed to Lit to send her a link of facts, personal accounts and such so she can read anonymously... but... to my surprise... it wasn't here.

My tool, my source that I grew to count on for so many things over the years - failed me. We all don't come here for pictures and cyber... we come for recipes, rope tricks, pervertable ideas, find a lost hampster advice, how to deal with mother-in-laws, boredom ... I've found the sky is the limit here.

I wondered, how many others came up short in hope to get anonymous infornmation and comfort from here... so... I took it into my own hands, and followed the anonymous trend... and posted it across the forums then gave it a centralized home.

I am hurt that you said I have no respect to post under my usual name. I made myself an example for regulars who wish to post anonymously on such a difficult topic to talk about. It is like you are saying you have zero secrets and can admit anything and everything to everyone no matter who. If you can, then I truly honor you. And I am not being patronizing, that really is wonderful.
But, just incase one day you don't feel that way - but wish to share and can't with the usual people... here is another group of people, that I am sort of modeling this whole mission of mine after : Post Secret.