A question about Self-esteem

[ShyGuy68]

I just finished watching a documentary about English teenagers who have been getting a boob job, and was wondering about a few things.

If you as a parent had a teenage daughter who came to you, and told you that she wanted a boob job really badly, because her real boobs was the reason for her low self-esteem, what would you do? Would you let her have the boob job, with the possibility of a bad operation, and what ever unknown damage the implants can do to her later in life? Or would you do everything in your power to teach her that the mind, and not the looks, are the most important thing here in the world, even though TV, Fashion, Movies and so on make it look otherwise?

I don’t have any kid’s myself, but if I ever get a daughter, I for sure will try to teach her as she grows up that she isn’t beautiful because of her boob or any other body part’s, but because of who she is!

Just my 2 ¢ worth.

 

[unusuallyconfused]

I am one of those parents who cares about their kids and what they think of themselves. I think that should never be an issue if you are constantly in touch with your kids and from early on they feel that their sense of worth is not in their body.

 

[lavender]

 

[Pyper]

I'd say sure, but you're payin for it honey.

 

[ChaoticLil]

Back in the dinosaur days when I was a teenager, I went through the oposite. I started to wear a bra in 5th grade (should have been earlier), and all guys looked at was them. Now my daughter is in 6th grade and she's taking after her mom of just about everything (I'm planning on planting catus under her window. Make her sneak through the front door like civilized people).

The point I'm trying to make is that almost everyone hates something about their body; it's part of growing up. What I feel this is teaching these girls is that there is a quick fix for everything. What I would do is try to explain to my daughter that boobs don't matter to the people who truly care for them, and that if she still wanted it in 2 years we will discuss it again. At that time I would also make it clear that I would not be paying for the job completely; she would have to foot half of the cost herself.

 

[lavender]

 

[*Lazer*]

Surgery even "minor" has significant risks. I worked with a woman who was never satisfied with the results of the surgeries she had (three breast augmentations and numerous facial and contouring surgery. I think her money would have been better spent on more education and psychiatric help. The knife seemed to be easier for her to go through then self examination of her mind. Sad really when you think about it. I have always felt great unease when I think of the message she has sent to her three daughters.

 

[Pyper]

At the last unofficial Lit census, Californians and Texans were equal. So get away, you ten gallon hat-wearing cow lovers! The pervs are in California, where they should be!

 

[*Lazer*]

Surgery even "minor" has significant risks. I worked with a woman who was never satisfied with the results of the surgeries she had (three breast augmentations and numerous facial and contouring surgery). I think her money would have been better spent on more education and psychiatric help. The knife seemed to be easier for her to go through then self examination of her mind. Sad really when you think about it. I have always felt great unease when I think of the message she has sent to her three daughters.

 

[ShyGuy68]

The sad thing about the girls/women in this tv documentary was that quite a few off them did get a better self-esteem after their boob job! Which to me shows that they maybe aren't very mature yet, because mature people do seem to have a different point of view on it.

Lavender I'm agree with you if it's for medical reasons, like a reductuion, or reconstructive surgery, but otherwise I'm would probably say no as well if I was in the situation.

To me what is important in a woman, is not her looks, but her personality! Ok I admit that I do like a nice pair of ..... eyes though! They are the mirror of the soul, isn't that what the saying is??

 

[ChaoticLil]

Well, thank you Lavender!

Actually I'm in Texas right now, but I'm fixing to move to Hollyweird this October.

And I do love them pervs! Makes life VERY interesting.

 

[Morden]

Well the teenager getting a boob job is a bit much. There are a lot of complications with that if I remmeber correctly. At most if it really was something that would make her feel better. I would get her some of the natural creams. The only time I think this would be something I might just might consider surgery is if the lopsided effect was present. I might then let her know that later on we will do it, and try to save the money up. I have run into a few females who suffer from this and I think that is something that can be fixed. Or I might just look into some of the more expensive Bra's that can help. I personally love those. I think if a woman needs a little boost do it. When I have them naked and alone its not really gonna matter.

 

[beckbabe]

I would say no absolutly...even for a reduction, the risk is too big. If she wanted to proceed when she was an adult of course I couldn't stop her...but I would try! Thank god I have boys.

 

[BrainyBeauty]

Would I allow a teenager to have breast implants? Categorically and emphatically, no! For many reasons, not the least of which is health concerns.

Introduction of any foreign matter to the body sets up the possibility of a multitude of problems ranging from infection, rejection, and the immune system reacting to this as an attack on the body.

As I said on a similar thread a while ago, I don't understand why people place so much emphasis on their looks. Too much media pressure? Too much peer pressure? Too many external opinions forcing them to make dramatic physical changes?

People (mostly women) will always want to look beautiful. Someone - with something to sell - will always come along and tell you how you can look better. Someone will be there to suggest that you aren't living up to your potential.

Applying cosmetics and jewelry, etc., to enhance one's appearance is nothing new. It's been done for centuries- maybe even millennia. Men also have groomed themselves to attract sexual partners over the years. Nothing wrong with that. We choose clothing, hairstyles and perfumes with one thought in mind. How to attract a mate. Totally human. Hell - not just human. All life forms including the lowly fungus and lichen practice ways of seduction! Throwing their spores in the air and thriving in dark, wet, moist places! The little tramps! hehehe

Flowers produce colorful petals; birds display extravagant plumage. But they use what nature gave them. We alone feel the need to go further. To pursue perfection at the end of a scalpel. *shudders*

I cannot comprehend the desire to undergo such dramatic and extreme procedures in the name of aesthetics. I can understand if a cosmetic procedure is performed to correct a disfigurement or for medical reasons. But simply to increase the size of a woman's breasts seems shallow, narcissistic and pointless. I wonder if the woman feels pressured by her male partner? And doesn't that suggest that it is more for his pleasure than hers?

There is something called body dysmorphic disorder where people have a distorted view of their bodies. (Anorexics are a prime example) Perhaps this explains the phenomenon. Or "the grass is always greener" philosophy. Or coveting thy neighbor's boobs???

I personally would never do it. Don't need it. But just remember, surgical enhancement is a pretty drastic and irreversible option. Any woman or teenage girl considering this might want to start slowly with something like "Curves" or other brand name pads, fillers, or the like. Something she can take out of her bra if she doesn't like it. That is a lot easier than having to go back for additional plastic surgeries to correct a mistake.

She might try shopping at Victoria's Secret or Frederick's of Hollywood- they both offer new bra styles that allow you to manipulate the cleavage. That is presuming she just wants to "appear" bustier to the outside world. If it is for a man or to attract a boyfriend or because she has self esteem issues, then none of these suggestions will work. Maybe a visit to a therapist? She might benefit from seeing a mental health professional prior to making a decision to undergo surgery.

As I said earlier, I would never do it. I was born with all my parts in a good proportion and on a pleasing palette, but still, I don't believe I would ever consider it if that were not the case. I like what I was born with! I wish other people were happy with themselves.

 

[Wizard]

I would like to put my 2 cents in also.......................This may have been said but I don't think it was and I can't say for sure , maybe some of the good dr's out here can say for sure but ...........A teenagers body it NOT done developing at that age ......I could be wrong but I swear I read something one time that a girls breast are still growing till around 22 or so....................I also would have to say NO WAY.......................

 

[Blackbich]

So sad.

Most likely, my daughter would take after me and would be considering a reduction by the time she was 16. Okay, so I got a little off the point.

If my daughter came to me and asked for implants, I'd tell her that she had to help pay for the surgery with the stipulation that the only way I'd sign for it would be AFTER she completed extensive counseling. My personal belief is, after couseling was completed, the surgery would no longer be an issue because she'd have the self esteem she thought she'd get with her new boobies (I'd hope, anyway). The women I know with implants were happy for only a short time. I don't think it's worth the possible risks and I'd stress that to her.

 

[Desert Amazon]