A popular story with an less popular chapter?

[MediocreAuthor]

So the third chapter of Price of Embezzlement is not scoring as well as I was expecting, and not doing as well as the previous chapters.

Any thoughts?

 

[Gamblnluck]

Often you will start out strong. Your introduction catches the reader's attention, you set up the story and then set the hook. You can't keep up the momentum if you just repeat the same things or it does move the plot along. Chapter length is important. Yours is about right.... 10k. I'll have to go back and read the story for particulars on this chapter.
One thing I do is write at least one chapter ahead of what I post. That gives me flexibility. Just continue. As you go you might see you lose readers but the ones you keep will the ones you managed to snare. Sometimes you will see a story like that get more and more reads as time goes on.
Another thing is you just posted this chapter after months of wait. Even old readers have to go back and re-read the older chapters to catch up. Give it time.

 

[AwkwardlySet]

Usually, scores go up as chapters progress because the crowd that didn't like your story will not follow, so only those who did like the previous chapters are sticking with it. In that sense, it is a bit strange. Did you do something unexpected? Did you switch the dynamics, or make an unusual turn in the story?

 

[lovecraft68]

Generally this means you did something the readers did not expect and didn't like. Just looking at your tag line, maybe you're pushing the line between blackmail and real NC?

Its also new so maybe you've attracted a couple new trolls and as chapters go on you'll get less votes, but the trolls will stay for the duration.

Always a pisser when you realize the trolls here make more effort than the decent readers.

 

[MediocreAuthor]

Usually, scores go up as chapters progress because the crowd that didn't like your story will not follow, so only those who did like the previous chapters are sticking with it. In that sense, it is a bit strange. Did you do something unexpected? Did you switch the dynamics, or make an unusual turn in the story?

I included a reference to the menstrual cycle.
(This is the story that spawned that discussion in the AH)

If that's the reason it's unpopular, I've lost all respect for male erotica readers at large. Haha

 

[MediocreAuthor]

Its also new so maybe you've attracted a couple new trolls and as chapters go on you'll get less votes, but the trolls will stay for the duration.

Always a pisser when you realize the trolls here make more effort than the decent readers.

Possibly. Although I can't imagine what I've done to attract trolls (aside from generally being an insufferable bitch)

Generally this means you did something the readers did not expect and didn't like. Just looking at your tag line, maybe you're pushing the line between blackmail and real NC?

This chapter is the least NC of the bunch. But still certainly reluctance

 

[AwkwardlySet]

I included a reference to the menstrual cycle.
(This is the story that spawned that discussion in the AH)

If that's the reason it's unpopular, I've lost all respect for male erotica readers at large. Haha

I doubt that was the reason unless you went into too much... detail.

It's hard to guess without reading all three chapters, but either way, give it a day or two. Sometimes, if your story doesn't have many votes, all it takes is one random troll to make your scores suffer.

 

[lovecraft68]

I included a reference to the menstrual cycle.
(This is the story that spawned that discussion in the AH)

If that's the reason it's unpopular, I've lost all respect for male erotica readers at large. Haha

I don't know if that's it, unless you really went into detail on it, in which case I'd be like "Yeah, do we need this?" because unless you're pushing it in a fetish story, its a bit needless to go on about it in an erotic story.

FWIW, you're going to get very few real responses from men here on any topic.

 

[MediocreAuthor]

I don't know if that's it, unless you really went into detail on it, in which case I'd be like "Yeah, do we need this?" because unless you're pushing it in a fetish story, its a bit needless to go on about it in an erotic story.

FWIW, you're going to get very few real responses from men here on any topic.

It is plot relevant and there is no blood featured. I don't go on about it.

Basically a boss tells his dishonest secretary that she has to go without panties, but when she gets her period, he lets her wear a pad but bans her bra instead.

I pity any man who deems it's inclusion worthy of docking an entire star.

 

[Devinter]

This chapter is the least NC of the bunch. But still certainly reluctance

I haven't had the time to read the stories and I apologize for that - but this might actually be the reason. People who read NC are very honed in on that particular aspect of the story, I believe. If you have attracted readers that want this specific thing, and then turn it down a few notches, then the same reader that was committed since the first two parts might start giving you one star lower than they would have otherwise. And I am not sure that the NC people and the Reluctance people, despite sharing the same category, are truly the same readers. Some overlap, sure, but speaking for myself I think a bit of reluctance can even be " cute " in some cases where as stronger forms of NC is pretty difficult for me to even read.

The "more intense" the kink, the more important it is to keep it at the same level if not higher as you go along, I believe. For example, if you work on a series that's about "orgasm denial" and then at first there's complete denial, and then suddenly the characters start to become more lenient and a few orgasms are allowed, that'd be a big no-no I would imagine.

 

[MediocreAuthor]

I haven't had the time to read the stories and I apologize for that - but this might actually be the reason. People who read NC are very honed in on that particular aspect of the story, I believe. If you have attracted readers that want this specific thing, and then turn it down a few notches, then the same reader that was committed since the first two parts might start giving you one star lower than they would have otherwise. And I am not sure that the NC people and the Reluctance people, despite sharing the same category, are truly the same readers. Some overlap, sure, but speaking for myself I think a bit of reluctance can even be " cute " in some cases where as stronger forms of NC is pretty difficult for me to even read.

The "more intense" the kink, the more important it is to keep it at the same level if not higher as you go along, I believe. For example, if you work on a series that's about "orgasm denial" and then at first there's complete denial, and then suddenly the characters start to become more lenient and a few orgasms are allowed, that'd be a big no-no I would imagine.

Understandable, and perhaps that's so. Ruth is definitely more eager to reciprocate pleasure in this chapter than normal.

But if someone dislikes the change enough to punish the score, then you'd think they'd complain in the comments, yeah? And that hasn't happened (yet).

I'm aware that NC and R fans kinda want different things. But I think this story does a good job of riding that line.

If you read it, let me know what you think.

 

[Devinter]

If you read it, let me know what you think.

I did read the first chapter just a moment ago. It doesn't feel super-hardcore-NC to me at all, so perhaps my earlier consideration isn't correct in this case.

Now, I read the tags and the descriptions of the other two parts, and from what I'm gathering, these three parts conclude the story, but Ruth and her boss never fully go all the way? Could that be a factor? That the readers got really into the story, and then they were left not entirely satisfied because they really wanted a ton of sex at the end and it never arrived? I'm just guessing. If so, maybe a part four would be in order - commissioned or not.

I love your writing, by the way. You have such a way with words. And your stories also appeal to me, generally speaking, since we're both 'incredibly monogamous'.

 

[MediocreAuthor]

I did read the first chapter just a moment ago. It doesn't feel super-hardcore-NC to me at all, so perhaps my earlier consideration isn't correct in this case.

Now, I read the tags and the descriptions of the other two parts, and from what I'm gathering, these three parts conclude the story, but Ruth and her boss never fully go all the way? Could that be a factor? That the readers got really into the story, and then they were left not entirely satisfied because they really wanted a ton of sex at the end and it never arrived? I'm just guessing. If so, maybe a part four would be in order - commissioned or not.

I love your writing, by the way. You have such a way with words. And your stories also appeal to me, generally speaking, since we're both 'incredibly monogamous'.

One more chapter is planned to conclude the story, and I think that's about all I can milk out of this story anyway

Also, it has come to my attention that all of my stories have had an unusual drop in scores, which leads me to believe that I've been targeted by a troll.

It's not real problem, such things are bound to happen when you speak your mind in the forums.

Also, I got an absolutely hilarious comment:

Yawn. DNF

The idea that someone would either read both previous chapters, just to comment that the last chapter wasn't worth finishing... OR they would start on the third chapter like a moron who doesn't understand how stories work. That has me absolutely cracking up

Anyway, that explains the poor score, but I'm still open to critique on the chapter.

 

[Devinter]

Also, it has come to my attention that all of my stories have had an unusual drop in scores, which leads me to believe that I've been targeted by a troll.

It's not real problem, such things are bound to happen when you speak your mind in the forums.

Oh, that is highly unfortunate. But those 'troll votes' does get removed eventually, from what I've been told. Or at least a percentage of them. But the implication of what this means - the correlation of speaking your mind here on the forums, and receiving unfavourable votes in return - is most troublesome, because it is highly apparent that you're a kind-hearted person with a lot of empathy, based on the posts I've read from you. That basically means that someone who disagrees with you on something goes out of their way in an attempt to sabotage you - and I cannot imagine that being remotely warranted. Hmm..

On a lighter note; I do intend to finish your series, because I want to see what happens to the characters now. I must confess though, reading chapter 1, I found all of the characters realistically written - but so flawed and immoral that it's difficult for me to like any of them. Not every story needs someone to root for, of course - but I tend to find myself more emotionally invested when such personalities are being presented. Ruth's certainly a victim, but I must confess I feel less sympathetic knowing she's put herself into that position to some extent by committing serious crimes.

 

[MediocreAuthor]

I must confess though, reading chapter 1, I found all of the characters realistically written - but so flawed and immoral that it's difficult for me to like any of them.

Understandable!

I was watching Better Call Saul and my spouse said,

"Who are we supposed to root for?"

"Nobody, as far as I can tell. They're all awful, but it's still enjoyable to watch."

My stories are similar. I love D/s in wildly unrealistic scenarios where people take control in an aggressive manner, and yet everyone ends up satisfied by the end. That's not even remotely how life works, so in real life, all my characters would be terrible people.

 

[AchtungNight]

It’s hard to say what turns off readers in a multi chapter series. My Rendezvous story was split into 5 chapters for length issues- only the opening masturbation and layout chapter ranged below 5 when I had ratings on. Subsequent chapters featured a bisexual awakening, fisting fetish, sapphic triangle, and lesbian swapping orgy. Yet none of these got more than a single lasting vote in years of being posted on Lit. Granted, voting wasn’t always on, but… as long as readers are enjoying the stories I’m grateful for it. I should not judge.

 

[Rob_Royale]

The sequel to my Aunt Tina story is rated higher than the original, but I'm surpirsed how much the viewership falls off on Chapter 2. A third of the views Ch.1 gets on a daily basis.

 

[ElectricBlue]

The sequel to my Aunt Tina story is rated higher than the original, but I'm surpirsed how much the viewership falls off on Chapter 2. A third of the views Ch.1 gets on a daily basis.

That's typical. I reckon the third chapter gives you a better idea of true reader numbers, because that's when you've got readers sticking with the story until the end. I reckon your view count will be steady state(ish) from Ch.3 onwards, and your vote count much the same.