19 years old and still waitin...

[icy_cold_beer]

Ok here goes.
Long time lurker, first time poster.
I turned 19 a couple months ago and am still a virgin. Not just a virgin but completly sexually inexperienced except for kissing one girl. Ive never had a girlfriend or anything close to one. Im a pretty shy and quiet guy. Now i am NOT waiting for the right girl im just waitng for any girl. And I dont want people to reply with "just wait for the right girl, it will be more special" I Dont Care, i just want to have sex! All of my mates have done it a few times and have had serious girlfriends.

I go out every weekend with my mates to different pubs/clubs and try to meet girls, but sometimes I just end up having too much fun with mates and dont try to pick up. Other times it just doesnt work out. But as every weekend passes that nothting happens I start to think nothing will ever happen. A couple of weeks ago One of my best mates met a new girl and is having sex with her all the time after he was almost as inexperinced as me. And this makes it worse.

I know im only 19 and have many years ahead of me but i cant stop asking when it will happen? I just wanna get the ball rolling so the 2nd, 3rd, 4th times are easier.

Now ive got that off my chest hopefully a few people will have some encouraging words of advice.

 

[M's girl]

...... A couple of weeks ago One of my best mates met a new girl and is having sex with her all the time after he was almost as inexperinced as me. And this makes it worse.

It shouldn't. Look at it from the other side; if it can happen to him, it can happen to you as well. You just have to be patient, besides, what's 19 after all? I know that's not how it feels to you at this time but I would say you have nothing to worry about.

Try not to be (and act?) this desperate. Other people (yes - the girls too) will pick up on that and there are not many people (girls) who are actually looking for someone who is desperate. It's not very attractive. And if you happen to 'catch' someone who does not care you could be in for trouble. She might make you 'forget' to use/ask about birth control or have some STD or something.

It is not a matter of waiting for THE right girl, but waiting for A right girl is not a bad thing at all!

Welcome to Lit, by the way....

 

[Irish_Green]

I know the position that you are in mate, it isn't unique so know that others out there are in the same situation. With the exception of having a one night stand about two months ago I haven't had sex or even had a kiss in over three years and to be honest, I have no idea when either is going to happen again.

Just don't give up, just keep putting yourself out there and it will turn around. Like M's girl said, don't look to desperate. It will come off you like a bad stench. Just be you and get someone who will like you for you.

 

[an_angels_wings]

I didn't even hold hands with a guy until I was 20, let alone kiss and all that jazz. I'm glad I didn't just go around with random people, but obviously that isn't for everybody. Judging yourself by other people is not necessarily the way to go because it's obviously making you desperate (or, well, more desperate) and like M's girl said, desperation isn't attractive. And, to be perfectly honest, women can sniff it out a mile a way. And what's interesting even further is that a woman may also just be looking for a nice little one-night stand, but sometimes some women may get turned off if it's obvious that that's all you want. So, I dunno, change your tactics a bit? Relax, have some fun ... what's it to you if she goes home with you or not, right? Just don't lead her on necessarily. But that sort of carefree attitude in a way might be just what helps you out a bit.

Take it easy, I know a couple of guys that are your age, or even a little older who are still virgins and they're perfectly fine with it. Again, not that you ought to judge yourself by other people, but just in case that makes you feel better in that you're not a freak or something because you're 19 and haven't really been intimate.

Just take it easy, it will come.

 

[icy_cold_beer]

Ok so desperation is a big NO-NO. I know that and my original post comes off my desperate than I really am. It was just a letting off of steam. Mostly because the last couple of weeks i had built up as great oppurtunitys to pick up that went begging.
I know that im only 19 and there are plenty of people in the same situation as me. Its just that some of my mates and other people i know make it look so easy to talk to and meet girls. Whens it goin to happen for me? This weekend? This month? This year? But it will happen

 

[pinkeden]

Honey, I met the most wonderful amazing gorgeous caring sweet guy this weekend who is 27 and still a virgin, so don't feel down on yourself!

Sex isn't *really* that great- especially the first time (or times, esp. if youre a girl) unless it's with someone with whom you share care and trust.

Going out with the want only to get your dick wet isn't going to go well. Try and meet a nice girl that you care about first, perhaps, and build on it from there?

 

[human_male]

Don't feel too bad. It's a lot more common than anyone would think for men to be quite old and still be virgins. Women make it so difficult. Ok there are guys that do well, but for most of us it takes work and luck. You sound like you're getting out there which is the main thing. Get invited to parties and try and get talking to people.

If you just want to get laid though maybe your best bet's a hooker.

Don't give up. If you give up, you're doomed, because they won't come to you.

 

[M's girl]

...... Women make it so difficult.

Do we now?

So what are we supposed to be? Easy fucks for everyone to enjoy? You probably don't mean it that way, and I know you are frustrated, but all you really need to do is adjust your attitude.

A woman, just like most men I suppose, will fall for the guy that treats her well and whom she is attracted to. And that attraction has to go both ways. Both women ánd men need to put some time and effort into the whole courting thing for it to be succesful so if what you're currently doing does not work, then change your ways (while staying true to your caracter).

 

[icy_cold_beer]

If you just want to get laid though maybe your best bet's a hooker.

Definately out of the question. At least in the short and medium term future. Thats just too easy. Takes the fun out of the whole "chase".