1-sentence story thread!

[Honey123]

Meanwhile, Super Hero Clooney and the twenty foot snails were still roaming the sky, Clooney being fucked up the ass, as he ate out the woman in front of him who he thought was his mother, but was actually his AUNT Rosemary, she raised him as her own and had never told him his mother gave him up at birth. As Clooney was being fucked in the ass by the twenty foot snail and eating out his Mother/Aunt Rosemary, this firey threesome had no idea that the plane was descending toward the ground in a frightfully fast way!!! The added weight of the giant snails, combined with the violent motion in one of the bathrooms and adjacent aisle, had caused the pilot to almost lose control, but he was skillfully managing to land it near a large pond in Australia.

When the plane landed, Clooney staggered out and seeing a woman, was immediately enraptured by Bindy, who, after the delightful orgasm she'd just had, was lying with her legs open and her eyes closed. Stroking her well worn-out croc and smiling.

Of course the cock.. err.. croc being stroked was dead, for Bindy had killed him in the height of her orgasm, as was her habit. Clooney ignored the dead croc because he only had eyes for Bindy's hot, dripping pussy and he was seized with a strong urge to get on his knees between her legs and bury his face in it.

But before he could, Bindy opened her eyes and said, "Hey, mate, iis that a snail in your pocket or are you happy to see me?"

"I'm happy to see you but never mind that just now because I want to spend the next several hours eating your marvelous pussy."

Just then, Bindy's eyes were drawn to the 20 foot snail behind Clooney, and she fainted. Having led a rather isolated life, she had never seen a real cock before so the ten foot long one imbedded in Clooney's ass was something of a shock. Actually, shock is such a small word to describe what actually happened to Bindy, and coming right after her orgasm too.

Clooney was such an egotist that he thought that Bindy had fainted at the sight of his glorious handsomeness. His Glorious Handsomeness trotted over to Bindy and buried his face in her luxurious, flowing hair. Bindy had never trimmed her pubic hair which was why it was long and flowing. He fumbled around for some time and then finally reached the ultimate prize.

Clooney was such an egotist that he thought that Bindy had fainted at the sight of his glorious handsomeness. His Glorious Handsomeness trotted over to Bindy and buried his face in her luxurious, flowing hair. Bindy had never trimmed her pubic hair which was why it was long and flowing. He fumbled around for some time and then finally reached the ultimate prize. Clooney drew her luscious clit into his mouth and started sucking on the sweet love toy, while his tongue caressed the engorged top and sides. Clooney licked and sucked at Bindy's clit, once in a while spitting out some long hair that would stick in his teeth. The hair irritated his eyes and his face too, so Clooney finally gave up on clit-sucking. He then decided that he would take his Pride & Joy and shove it up Bindy's pussy and not so gently, which woke her up instantly and she rode him like a croc and we all know what happens to cocks...err crocs when Bindy rides 'em.

 

[Boxlicker101]

Meanwhile, Super Hero Clooney and the twenty foot snails were still roaming the sky, Clooney being fucked up the ass, as he ate out the woman in front of him who he thought was his mother, but was actually his AUNT Rosemary, she raised him as her own and had never told him his mother gave him up at birth. As Clooney was being fucked in the ass by the twenty foot snail and eating out his Mother/Aunt Rosemary, this firey threesome had no idea that the plane was descending toward the ground in a frightfully fast way!!! The added weight of the giant snails, combined with the violent motion in one of the bathrooms and adjacent aisle, had caused the pilot to almost lose control, but he was skillfully managing to land it near a large pond in Australia.

When the plane landed, Clooney staggered out and seeing a woman, was immediately enraptured by Bindy, who, after the delightful orgasm she'd just had, was lying with her legs open and her eyes closed. Stroking her well worn-out croc and smiling.

Of course the cock.. err.. croc being stroked was dead, for Bindy had killed him in the height of her orgasm, as was her habit. Clooney ignored the dead croc because he only had eyes for Bindy's hot, dripping pussy and he was seized with a strong urge to get on his knees between her legs and bury his face in it.

But before he could, Bindy opened her eyes and said, "Hey, mate, iis that a snail in your pocket or are you happy to see me?"

"I'm happy to see you but never mind that just now because I want to spend the next several hours eating your marvelous pussy."

Just then, Bindy's eyes were drawn to the 20 foot snail behind Clooney, and she fainted. Having led a rather isolated life, she had never seen a real cock before so the ten foot long one imbedded in Clooney's ass was something of a shock. Actually, shock is such a small word to describe what actually happened to Bindy, and coming right after her orgasm too.

Clooney was such an egotist that he thought that Bindy had fainted at the sight of his glorious handsomeness. His Glorious Handsomeness trotted over to Bindy and buried his face in her luxurious, flowing hair. Bindy had never trimmed her pubic hair which was why it was long and flowing. He fumbled around for some time and then finally reached the ultimate prize.

Clooney was such an egotist that he thought that Bindy had fainted at the sight of his glorious handsomeness. His Glorious Handsomeness trotted over to Bindy and buried his face in her luxurious, flowing hair. Bindy had never trimmed her pubic hair which was why it was long and flowing. He fumbled around for some time and then finally reached the ultimate prize. Clooney drew her luscious clit into his mouth and started sucking on the sweet love toy, while his tongue caressed the engorged top and sides. Clooney licked and sucked at Bindy's clit, once in a while spitting out some long hair that would stick in his teeth. The hair irritated his eyes and his face too, so Clooney finally gave up on clit-sucking. Even worse than the hair in his eyes had been the snail's ten foot long cock plowing in and out of his ass. He then decided that he would take his Pride & Joy and shove it up Bindy's pussy and not so gently, which woke her up instantly and she rode him like a croc and we all know what happens to cocks...err crocs when Bindy rides 'em. Fortunately for Clooney, the super hero suit that he was wearing beneath his clothing deflected her knife.

 

[Honey123]

Meanwhile, Super Hero Clooney and the twenty foot snails were still roaming the sky, Clooney being fucked up the ass, as he ate out the woman in front of him who he thought was his mother, but was actually his AUNT Rosemary, she raised him as her own and had never told him his mother gave him up at birth. As Clooney was being fucked in the ass by the twenty foot snail and eating out his Mother/Aunt Rosemary, this firey threesome had no idea that the plane was descending toward the ground in a frightfully fast way!!! The added weight of the giant snails, combined with the violent motion in one of the bathrooms and adjacent aisle, had caused the pilot to almost lose control, but he was skillfully managing to land it near a large pond in Australia.

When the plane landed, Clooney staggered out and seeing a woman, was immediately enraptured by Bindy, who, after the delightful orgasm she'd just had, was lying with her legs open and her eyes closed. Stroking her well worn-out croc and smiling.

Of course the cock.. err.. croc being stroked was dead, for Bindy had killed him in the height of her orgasm, as was her habit. Clooney ignored the dead croc because he only had eyes for Bindy's hot, dripping pussy and he was seized with a strong urge to get on his knees between her legs and bury his face in it.

But before he could, Bindy opened her eyes and said, "Hey, mate, iis that a snail in your pocket or are you happy to see me?"

"I'm happy to see you but never mind that just now because I want to spend the next several hours eating your marvelous pussy."

Just then, Bindy's eyes were drawn to the 20 foot snail behind Clooney, and she fainted. Having led a rather isolated life, she had never seen a real cock before so the ten foot long one imbedded in Clooney's ass was something of a shock. Actually, shock is such a small word to describe what actually happened to Bindy, and coming right after her orgasm too.

Clooney was such an egotist that he thought that Bindy had fainted at the sight of his glorious handsomeness. His Glorious Handsomeness trotted over to Bindy and buried his face in her luxurious, flowing hair. Bindy had never trimmed her pubic hair which was why it was long and flowing. He fumbled around for some time and then finally reached the ultimate prize.

Clooney was such an egotist that he thought that Bindy had fainted at the sight of his glorious handsomeness. His Glorious Handsomeness trotted over to Bindy and buried his face in her luxurious, flowing hair. Bindy had never trimmed her pubic hair which was why it was long and flowing. He fumbled around for some time and then finally reached the ultimate prize. Clooney drew her luscious clit into his mouth and started sucking on the sweet love toy, while his tongue caressed the engorged top and sides. Clooney licked and sucked at Bindy's clit, once in a while spitting out some long hair that would stick in his teeth. The hair irritated his eyes and his face too, so Clooney finally gave up on clit-sucking. Even worse than the hair in his eyes had been the snail's ten foot long cock plowing in and out of his ass. He then decided that he would take his Pride & Joy and shove it up Bindy's pussy and not so gently, which woke her up instantly and she rode him like a croc and we all know what happens to cocks...err crocs when Bindy rides 'em. Fortunately for Clooney, the super hero suit that he was wearing beneath his clothing deflected her knife.

Once Bindy woke up from her dazed orgasmic fainting spell, she realized whatshe was doing and saw Glorious Handsomeness before her, bleeding and whimpering in pain, "Ouchy! Ouchy!" whimpered Clooney, "that smarts!"

 

[Boxlicker101]

Meanwhile, Super Hero Clooney and the twenty foot snails were still roaming the sky, Clooney being fucked up the ass, as he ate out the woman in front of him who he thought was his mother, but was actually his AUNT Rosemary, she raised him as her own and had never told him his mother gave him up at birth. As Clooney was being fucked in the ass by the twenty foot snail and eating out his Mother/Aunt Rosemary, this firey threesome had no idea that the plane was descending toward the ground in a frightfully fast way!!! The added weight of the giant snails, combined with the violent motion in one of the bathrooms and adjacent aisle, had caused the pilot to almost lose control, but he was skillfully managing to land it near a large pond in Australia.

When the plane landed, Clooney staggered out and seeing a woman, was immediately enraptured by Bindy, who, after the delightful orgasm she'd just had, was lying with her legs open and her eyes closed. Stroking her well worn-out croc and smiling.

Of course the cock.. err.. croc being stroked was dead, for Bindy had killed him in the height of her orgasm, as was her habit. Clooney ignored the dead croc because he only had eyes for Bindy's hot, dripping pussy and he was seized with a strong urge to get on his knees between her legs and bury his face in it.

But before he could, Bindy opened her eyes and said, "Hey, mate, iis that a snail in your pocket or are you happy to see me?"

"I'm happy to see you but never mind that just now because I want to spend the next several hours eating your marvelous pussy."

Just then, Bindy's eyes were drawn to the 20 foot snail behind Clooney, and she fainted. Having led a rather isolated life, she had never seen a real cock before so the ten foot long one imbedded in Clooney's ass was something of a shock. Actually, shock is such a small word to describe what actually happened to Bindy, and coming right after her orgasm too.

Clooney was such an egotist that he thought that Bindy had fainted at the sight of his glorious handsomeness. His Glorious Handsomeness trotted over to Bindy and buried his face in her luxurious, flowing hair. Bindy had never trimmed her pubic hair which was why it was long and flowing. He fumbled around for some time and then finally reached the ultimate prize.

Clooney was such an egotist that he thought that Bindy had fainted at the sight of his glorious handsomeness. His Glorious Handsomeness trotted over to Bindy and buried his face in her luxurious, flowing hair. Bindy had never trimmed her pubic hair which was why it was long and flowing. He fumbled around for some time and then finally reached the ultimate prize. Clooney drew her luscious clit into his mouth and started sucking on the sweet love toy, while his tongue caressed the engorged top and sides. Clooney licked and sucked at Bindy's clit, once in a while spitting out some long hair that would stick in his teeth. The hair irritated his eyes and his face too, so Clooney finally gave up on clit-sucking. Even worse than the hair in his eyes had been the snail's ten foot long cock plowing in and out of his ass. He then decided that he would take his Pride & Joy and shove it up Bindy's pussy and not so gently, which woke her up instantly and she rode him like a croc and we all know what happens to cocks...err crocs when Bindy rides 'em. Fortunately for Clooney, the super hero suit that he was wearing beneath his clothing deflected her knife.

Once Bindy woke up from her dazed orgasmic fainting spell, she realized whatshe was doing and saw Glorious Handsomeness before her, bleeding and whimpering in pain, "Ouchy! Ouchy!" whimpered Clooney, "that smarts!"

Being on opposite sides of the land mollusk question, Bindy and Clooney were mortal enemies but, because of the secretiveness of both organizations and the confusion and weirdness of this thread, neither one knew it and Bindy, after seeing the big cock on the snail and how he was fucking clooney in the ass with it and thinking about how much she had enjoyed having her pussy eaten by Clooney, changed sides then and there.

 

[Honey123]

Clooney was such an egotist that he thought that Bindy had fainted at the sight of his glorious handsomeness. His Glorious Handsomeness trotted over to Bindy and buried his face in her luxurious, flowing hair. Bindy had never trimmed her pubic hair which was why it was long and flowing. He fumbled around for some time and then finally reached the ultimate prize. Clooney drew her luscious clit into his mouth and started sucking on the sweet love toy, while his tongue caressed the engorged top and sides. Clooney licked and sucked at Bindy's clit, once in a while spitting out some long hair that would stick in his teeth. The hair irritated his eyes and his face too, so Clooney finally gave up on clit-sucking. Even worse than the hair in his eyes had been the snail's ten foot long cock plowing in and out of his ass. He then decided that he would take his Pride & Joy and shove it up Bindy's pussy and not so gently, which woke her up instantly and she rode him like a croc and we all know what happens to cocks...err crocs when Bindy rides 'em. Fortunately for Clooney, the super hero suit that he was wearing beneath his clothing deflected her knife.

Once Bindy woke up from her dazed orgasmic fainting spell, she realized whatshe was doing and saw Glorious Handsomeness before her, bleeding and whimpering in pain, "Ouchy! Ouchy!" whimpered Clooney, "that smarts!"

Being on opposite sides of the land mollusk question, Bindy and Clooney were mortal enemies but, because of the secretiveness of both organizations and the confusion and weirdness of this thread, neither one knew it and Bindy, after seeing the big cock on the snail and how he was fucking clooney in the ass with it and thinking about how much she had enjoyed having her pussy eaten by Clooney, changed sides then and there.

Bindy and Clooney were quite happy as they snuggled against each other, but danger in the form of Corinne a/k/a Corey lurked in the bush, well, not her bush, although it is so long and hairy Lord knows what could be hiding in ther!!!


Oh, Box, this thread is crazy, weird and yet so addicting!

 

[Boxlicker101]

Clooney was such an egotist that he thought that Bindy had fainted at the sight of hi

Clooney was such an egotist that he thought that Bindy had fainted at the sight of his glorious handsomeness. His Glorious Handsomeness trotted over to Bindy and buried his face in her luxurious, flowing hair. Bindy had never trimmed her pubic hair which was why it was long and flowing. He fumbled around for some time and then finally reached the ultimate prize. Clooney drew her luscious clit into his mouth and started sucking on the sweet love toy, while his tongue caressed the engorged top and sides. Clooney licked and sucked at Bindy's clit, once in a while spitting out some long hair that would stick in his teeth. The hair irritated his eyes and his face too, so Clooney finally gave up on clit-sucking. Even worse than the hair in his eyes had been the snail's ten foot long cock plowing in and out of his ass. He then decided that he would take his Pride & Joy and shove it up Bindy's pussy and not so gently, which woke her up instantly and she rode him like a croc and we all know what happens to cocks...err crocs when Bindy rides 'em. Fortunately for Clooney, the super hero suit that he was wearing beneath his clothing deflected her knife.

Once Bindy woke up from her dazed orgasmic fainting spell, she realized whatshe was doing and saw Glorious Handsomeness before her, bleeding and whimpering in pain, "Ouchy! Ouchy!" whimpered Clooney, "that smarts!"

Being on opposite sides of the land mollusk question, Bindy and Clooney were mortal enemies but, because of the secretiveness of both organizations and the confusion and weirdness of this thread, neither one knew it and Bindy, after seeing the big cock on the snail and how he was fucking clooney in the ass with it and thinking about how much she had enjoyed having her pussy eaten by Clooney, changed sides then and there.

Bindy and Clooney were quite happy as they snuggled against each other, but danger in the form of Corinne a/k/a Corey lurked in the bush, well, not her bush, although it is so long and hairy Lord knows what could be hiding in there!!!

Actually, the danger was to Corey because, although all three of them were now on the same side, at least as far as the land mollusk question was concerned, none of them knew this, being almost as confused as the people posting to this thread.


It is addicting and it is getting crazier and weirder.

 

[Honey123]

Once Bindy woke up from her dazed orgasmic fainting spell, she realized whatshe was doing and saw Glorious Handsomeness before her, bleeding and whimpering in pain, "Ouchy! Ouchy!" whimpered Clooney, "that smarts!"

Being on opposite sides of the land mollusk question, Bindy and Clooney were mortal enemies but, because of the secretiveness of both organizations and the confusion and weirdness of this thread, neither one knew it and Bindy, after seeing the big cock on the snail and how he was fucking clooney in the ass with it and thinking about how much she had enjoyed having her pussy eaten by Clooney, changed sides then and there.

Bindy and Clooney were quite happy as they snuggled against each other, but danger in the form of Corinne a/k/a Corey lurked in the bush, well, not her bush, although it is so long and hairy Lord knows what could be hiding in there!!!

Actually, the danger was to Corey because, although all three of them were now on the same side, at least as far as the land mollusk question was concerned, none of them knew this, being almost as confused as the people posting to this thread.

But someone, somewhere had to take charge, there was too much at risk, too much at stake but, who, who could that person be.........??


We need to on board again, I think....or just make this into an incredible sex story???

 

[Boxlicker101]

Once Bindy woke up from her dazed orgasmic fainting spell, she realized whatshe was doing and saw Glorious Handsomeness before her, bleeding and whimpering in pain, "Ouchy! Ouchy!" whimpered Clooney, "that smarts!"

Being on opposite sides of the land mollusk question, Bindy and Clooney were mortal enemies but, because of the secretiveness of both organizations and the confusion and weirdness of this thread, neither one knew it and Bindy, after seeing the big cock on the snail and how he was fucking clooney in the ass with it and thinking about how much she had enjoyed having her pussy eaten by Clooney, changed sides then and there.

Bindy and Clooney were quite happy as they snuggled against each other, but danger in the form of Corinne a/k/a Corey lurked in the bush, well, not her bush, although it is so long and hairy Lord knows what could be hiding in there!!!

Actually, the danger was to Corey because, although all three of them were now on the same side, at least as far as the land mollusk question was concerned, none of them knew this, being almost as confused as the people posting to this thread.

But someone, somewhere had to take charge, there was too much at risk, too much at stake but, who, who could that person be.........??

Clooney, suddenly realizing he was a super-hero, leaped to his feet to take charge, peeling off his pants to reveal his super-hero costume, less impressive than it might have been because of the snail cum on the seat.

 

[Boxlicker101]

The persistent swish of the windshield wipers was putting Jasmine to sleep as traffic crept along at a snail’s pace. As a snail, Jasmine had never enjoyed traffic very much until today. But last night she had experienced her first multiple and even grid-lock could not get her down. Several days later, Jasmine galloped the final thirty-five inches into the supermarket parking lot and read her employer's shopping list: "Butter, fresh garlic, French bread, escargot..." Her eyes grew wide and she was just opening her mouth to rail about her employer's requests when a large shadow developed overhead and in an instant her life was snubbed out by Prada. Just before she died, she asked "Who is Prada?"

The woman exiting the grocery store swore loudly upon the crunching beneath her shoes and proceeded to smear poor Jasmine's remains along the asphalt to clean her gorgeous and expensive footwear. Jasmine's loss, however, was the ants' gain.

Less than a year ago, the Prada pumps - which were lipstick-red, with a practical yet sexy two-inch "kitten" heel - had been the smooth but intriguingly textured underbelly of a young Australian crocodile we'll call Bruce.

Bruce was slithering along one day, minding his own business when suddenly a beautiful and large breasted blonde leapt from the cattails, landing right on his back and encircling his chest with her arms. Bruce, slightly annoyed by the commotion, stopped dead in his tracks and turned his head to glare at the intruder of his peaceful morning trot.

The hostile blonde wrestled him ashore where, of all things, she began tickling him. Because this, laidies and gentlemen, was not your ordinary run-of-the-mill bimbo, but the fabulous Brenda Busty. Brenda happened to be the now-grown daughter of television's famed Crocodile Hunter, so naturally she was "croc savvy." Formerly known as Bindy, Brenda really knew how to turn on a wily croc.

"Croiky," cried Bruce, "This is dangerously close to a beastiality story."

Brenda laughed and shook her long, luxurious hair as she drew forth a long knife,"You should be so lucky, mate."

Impaling Bruce just below the jaw, Bindy smiled, if only her father knew she hated live crocs with a passion, thinking of how many pairs of shoes a croc this size would produce.

Also keeping in mind that she would have to remove Bruce’s spectacularly engorged bollocks, they were a highly prized and sought after aphrodisiac used to ward off impotency and genital warts, sacred to the people of the Hahaha tribe who were currently claiming squatters rights in the oval office of the Whitehouse.

Where, even as Brenda busily bobbited Bruce, the chief of staff was conferring with an aborigine expert on how they might regain control without creating an international incident.

The chief of staff had the IQ of your average dishwasher.

Meanwhile, back at the supermarket parking lot where the young snail Jasmine had met her demise, the owner of the Prada pumps was in consultation with her attorney and the Snails, Slugs & Slime Trail Antidefamation Society were on the phone with the chief of staff's secretary, Corinne Dubois.

"Listen, Ms. Dubois, I don't give a croc's ass that the chief of staff is busy, put him on the damn phone now." Bending over, the owner of Prada took off her gorgeous pump and scrapped Jasmine's remaining skin and blood onto the edge of the curb.

"Dammit, someone get me a tissue!!" She exclaimed.

The silver remains making a streak across the ground, glittering in the sunlight.

At the White House, Corinne put her hand over the phone and whispered to her boss, "Janet Jackson is on the line for you, sir."

"Hmmm. Tell her I'm busy. Can't you see I'm working, Corinne!" He replied, going back to his crossword puzzle. "Janet Jackson!! What a boob!!"

Corinne glared at her boss. What an absolute idiot, she thought. Glancing down at her Prada shoes, she thought about kicking him. She didn't, though, because she was too concerned about damaging her shoes, which she had affectionately named "Bruce".

She took her hand away from the receiver, "Janet?"

From the other end she hears, "Call me Ms. Jackson if you're nasty!"

"Ah, Okay...." Corinne replied. "Ms. Jackson, Jonathan is quite busy right now..."

"DAMMIT!!!" Ms. Jackson cut her off in midd-sentence. "There is nothing," she shouted into the phone, "As important as stopping the slaughter of innocent snails and slugs by women in expensive shoes!"

She felt a tapping on her shoulder and turned around.

"Excuse me, Miss, but what's that on your shoe?" A man asked her, pointing to the remains of Jasmine.

Meanwhile, back at the supermarket parking lot where the young snail Jasmine had met her demise, the owner of the Prada pumps was in consultation with her attorney and the Snails, Slugs & Slime Trail Antidefamation Society were on the phone with the chief of staff's secretary, Corinne Dubois.

"Listen, Ms. Dubois, I don't give a croc's ass that the chief of staff is busy, put him on the damn phone now." Bending over, the owner of Prada took off her gorgeous pump and scrapped Jasmine's remaining skin and blood onto the edge of the curb.

"Dammit, someone get me a tissue!!" She exclaimed.

The silver remains making a streak across the ground, glittering in the sunlight.

At the White House, Corinne put her hand over the phone and whispered to her boss, "Janet Jackson is on the line for you, sir."

"Hmmm. Tell her I'm busy. Can't you see I'm working, Corinne!" He replied, going back to his crossword puzzle. "Janet Jackson!! What a boob!!"

Corinne glared at her boss. What an absolute idiot, she thought. Glancing down at her Prada shoes, she thought about kicking him. She didn't, though, because she was too concerned about damaging her shoes, which she had affectionately named "Bruce".

She took her hand away from the receiver, "Janet?"

From the other end she hears, "Call me Ms. Jackson if you're nasty!"

"Ah, Okay...." Corinne replied. "Ms. Jackson, Jonathan is quite busy right now..."

"DAMMIT!!!" Ms. Jackson cut her off in midd-sentence. "There is nothing," she shouted into the phone, "As important as stopping the slaughter of innocent snails and slugs by women in expensive shoes!"

She felt a tapping on her shoulder and turned around.

"Excuse me, Miss, but what's that on your shoe?" A man asked her, pointing to the remains of Jasmine.

After exposing one of her boobs to the man and anybody else who might be watching, she replied, "Escargot".

"Bless you!" He replied, quickly revealing to her that he was in fact Agent Two-Penises, sent on a secret mission to infiltrate the almost secret C.U.M society ( Citizenship for Urban Molluscs).

Realizing that she was in the presence of a secret agent of the enemy snail haters league, Janet thought quickly and, after covering her boob, she smiled sweetly.

Hiding the gem incrusted nipple jewellery shaped out of a snail shell looking remarkably similar to Jasmines, she responded, "It's semen from when I kicked Bill Clinton in his crotch when he tried to stick a cigar in my pussy.

Meanwhile, in a secret compound deep beneath the polar ice cap, a woman read pornography on the internet and plotted wicked deeds. Her first order of business was to swap her blind husband's toothpaste out with hair removal cream. The cream, besides its primary function, could also be used to remove the remains of snails or slugs from shoes, and this was considered to be important in the plot to exterminate these creatures.

This, however, was of no concern to him as he gagged and choked at the awful taste of what he assumed was napalm in a tube.

In fact, "Napalm In A Tube" had been one of the few, failed new product introductions by Proctor & Gamble, for whom Corinne Dubois had worked as an assistant to the director of research and development...before "the incident" had taken her to the White House, where she fielded phone calls from breast-exposing, entertainment-industry publicity whores.

The man screamed as he spat the rancid paste into the sink, "Stella, you bitch! What wickedness possesses you to punish me so?" Then he realized that, although he had just performed oral sex on Stella, leaving some of her hair stuck in his teeth, the hair had miraculously disappeared.

As her husband fell to the floor, she heard his screams of dispair, "Stel--la! Stel--la!" She ignored him, though, and continued assembling the incindiary bombs that were to be used against orphanages. She had her orders and needed to work fast so she could get the bombs to someone she only knew as "Bindy". Although nobody knew it at the time, "Bindy" was mean and nasty because of a lack of pornography or smut.

Being brought up in a sex deprived family the only way Bindy was able to feel desire was to hump the crocs she wrestled, the more they moved the more it turned her on.

Bruce was her favorite with his hard skin and bumpy scales, she could reach an orgasm in record time. It wasn't much fun for the crocs, though, because after climaxing, Bindy killed them to make shoes from their hides.

Once Stella was done packaging the bombs, her instructions were to get on the phone with C.U.M. Stella objected to this idea, however, saying, "There's no room for me and them on the phone because it is so small that even I can just barely fit on there."

Stella, you see my dear friends, is the epitome of a dumb blonde. She is so dumb, in fact, that when C. U. M. said to use powder in the bombs, she thought they meant her face powder so that is what she made them of. Fortunately for the snails, the face power worked against the hair removal cream, making them grow in size.

When the bombs went off in the orphanages, they did no damage at all and spread the face powder, increasing the size of all the nearby snails and slugs.

"The C.U.M., where is the C.U.M.!!!", cried the critters. Because C.U.M. was strongly pro-snail, the molllusks wanted to form an alliance to destroy their enemies.

Agent Two-Penises heard their cries of need and immediately rose to the occasion. The agent, named because his penis was as big as two normal sized ones, had just recovered from hearing about an injury to his hero, Bill Clinton.

Meanwhile, on a private jet en route to Milan, George Clooney removed his shirt, stretched and yawned, pondering the meaning of existence as he began to unzip his pants. His thoughts quickly turned to simpler and yet more elemental ponderings as the zipper reached the end of its track. Eyeing his SuperHero costume which was hidden under his slacks, his mind began to develope a plan to not only save the land Mollusks but to put Bindy in her righfull place, in his lap.

"First, I have to stop Stella from blowing up any more orphanages," he decided.

But then he was distracted by a gorgeous blonde stewardess and his thoughts immediately went to her blowing him and the Mile High Club. When he suggested this, however, she said, "George, how could you, I am your mother," and, sure enough, it was the great singer, Rosemary Clooney after extensive plastic surgery. Since she has been dead for quite some time, those nasty snails did a job on her!

Although it is not commonly known, snails are voodoo experts and they had transformed the late ms. Clooney into a zombie, intending to use her to further their aims in Hollywood.

While George and Rosemary took a trip to the bathroom, it seemed that a very large, dark cloud was looming over the jet, making it quite difficult for the pilot to see.
Literotica Guru

Registered: Apr 2003
Location: Snuggling with my wife
Posts: 1451
As it got closer, the pilot realized it was not a cloud; it was a huge net, held aloft by giant flying snails, transformed by the face-powder bomb. The plane shook and bucked, quite like Rosemary in the bathroom. George was sitting on the toilet seat; his mother was on his lap, facing him, and his cock was imbedded deeply in her pussy. "Oh, George!" Rosemary cried, "Fuck me, fuck me like a wombat with a 7 inch dildo! I have been dead for a long time and I have really missed your big, hard cock in my cunt!"

While the plane bucked, George stuck his hard, thick cock in Rosemary's dusty and somewhat shrivelled pussy. In and out, he drove it, while fingering his mother's ass.

"Mommy, Oh Mommy," George moaned, "You're ass is so tight! Your cunt is loose but your ass is so tight, I want to fuck you there."

But unfortunately, before he could do that, the door swung open and there stood before them a 20 foot snail, with a 10 foot cock! "I am going to fuck your mother in her ass first," the snail announced. George replied, "Oh, no buddy, you're gonna fuck me first in the ass, then my Mommy!"

"I'm not a mummy, you idiot; I'm a zombie," his mother, rather hearing-impared, said to George.

Meanwhile back at the whitehouse, Agent Two-Penises was alerted to hostile take-over of Super Hero Clooney's plane and immediately stopped jerking-off to find the C.U.M. They weren't hard to find because they were accompanied by twenty foot snails with ten foot penises.

Linking into the Super Hero Radar Center of Super Hero Clooney, Agent Two- Penises, located an odd object flying near the Kennedy Space Center, knowing immediately this was Super Hero Clooney and the 20 foot Snails buy the dick shaped cloud that formed on the screen.


Agent Two-Penises immediately called Corinne Dubois, his assistant and showed her the radar screen to which she replied, "Let 'em eat cake!" and at that moment, Agent Two-Penises knew, not cake, but pussy!!!

"This is really good," he said, licking Corinne's fresh pussy juices off his lips, then diving back to enclose her clit in his mouth.

But little did Agent Two-Penises know that Corinne had smoothed the "cream" all over her clit, and as his licks became slower, she pushed his head in deeper to her pussy and as she reached her orgasm she yelled, "Viva La C.U.M.!!!" Unknown to the government, Corinne had been a secrent agent of C.U.M. all along but now she had to cum out in the open.

As Corinne kicked Two-Penises aside with her red Prada shoes, she picked up the telephone and made a direct call to Bindy. "Bindy, I have just ruined my shoes kicking a bad guy so you are going to have to kill some more crocodiles to make more."

To which Bindy replied, "Corinne, it will be my pleasure, mate, I haven't had a good orgasm since my Bruce bucked and shook under me."

Corinne was aware that Bindy was a member of the dastardly Snail Haters League, but she really need shoes and, as she said, "First things first." The one thing Corinne believed in was, whether in sex or in life, she always CAME first, and if she had to play both sides of the fence, dammit, she'd do it! This was especially so when it came to her shoe wardrobe.

"Corinne," Bindy continued. "Ever do a woman? I have only ever done crocs, male or female, and I have always wondered about eating a hot pussy like yours, or having mine eaten."

Corinne paused for a moment, not quite sure if at this time she should tell Bindy that she was a cross-dresser, a male who loved wearing woman's clothes, especialy red Prada shoes. Being a heterosexual who liked wearing women's clothing, Corinne thought happily about eating Bindy's pussy but she wondered about what Bindy would do when she realized she had been tricked, especially considering how handy Bindy was with her knife.

"Bindy,' Corey said, "it would be my pleasure to eat you, as I always wondered what an Aussy Pussy would taste like."

"Well, why don't you come on down under to go down under on me and you will find out." With that Bindy hung up the phone and feeling a bit excited and horny, went outside to look for the biggest, scaliest croc in the pond and when she found him, she road him, rubbing her Aussy pussy against him until she came, screaming, "Yes! Yes.......I'm cummmmmmmmmmmmminnnnnnnnnnng!"

Meanwhile, Super Hero Clooney and the twenty foot snails were still roaming the sky, Clooney being fucked up the ass, as he ate out the woman in front of him who he thought was his mother, but was actually his AUNT Rosemary, she raised him as her own and had never told him his mother gave him up at birth. As Clooney was being fucked in the ass by the twenty foot snail and eating out his Mother/Aunt Rosemary, this firey threesome had no idea that the plane was descending toward the ground in a frightfully fast way!!! The added weight of the giant snails, combined with the violent motion in one of the bathrooms and adjacent aisle, had caused the pilot to almost lose control, but he was skillfully managing to land it near a large pond in Australia.

When the plane landed, Clooney staggered out and seeing a woman, was immediately enraptured by Bindy, who, after the delightful orgasm she'd just had, was lying with her legs open and her eyes closed. Stroking her well worn-out croc and smiling.

Of course the cock.. err.. croc being stroked was dead, for Bindy had killed him in the height of her orgasm, as was her habit. Clooney ignored the dead croc because he only had eyes for Bindy's hot, dripping pussy and he was seized with a strong urge to get on his knees between her legs and bury his face in it.

But before he could, Bindy opened her eyes and said, "Hey, mate, iis that a snail in your pocket or are you happy to see me?"

"I'm happy to see you but never mind that just now because I want to spend the next several hours eating your marvelous pussy."

Just then, Bindy's eyes were drawn to the 20 foot snail behind Clooney, and she fainted. Having led a rather isolated life, she had never seen a real cock before so the ten foot long one imbedded in Clooney's ass was something of a shock. Actually, shock is such a small word to describe what actually happened to Bindy, and coming right after her orgasm too.

Clooney was such an egotist that he thought that Bindy had fainted at the sight of his glorious handsomeness. His Glorious Handsomeness trotted over to Bindy and buried his face in her luxurious, flowing hair. Bindy had never trimmed her pubic hair which was why it was long and flowing. He fumbled around for some time and then finally reached the ultimate prize.

Clooney was such an egotist that he thought that Bindy had fainted at the sight of his glorious handsomeness. His Glorious Handsomeness trotted over to Bindy and buried his face in her luxurious, flowing hair. Bindy had never trimmed her pubic hair which was why it was long and flowing. He fumbled around for some time and then finally reached the ultimate prize. Clooney drew her luscious clit into his mouth and started sucking on the sweet love toy, while his tongue caressed the engorged top and sides. Clooney licked and sucked at Bindy's clit, once in a while spitting out some long hair that would stick in his teeth. The hair irritated his eyes and his face too, so Clooney finally gave up on clit-sucking. He then decided that he would take his Pride & Joy and shove it up Bindy's pussy and not so gently, which woke her up instantly and she rode him like a croc and we all know what happens to cocks...err crocs when Bindy rides 'em. Fortunately for Clooney, the super hero suit that he was wearing beneath his clothing deflected her knife.

Once Bindy woke up from her dazed orgasmic fainting spell, she realized whatshe was doing and saw Glorious Handsomeness before her, bleeding and whimpering in pain, "Ouchy! Ouchy!" whimpered Clooney, "that smarts!"

Being on opposite sides of the land mollusk question, Bindy and Clooney were mortal enemies but, because of the secretiveness of both organizations and the confusion and weirdness of this thread, neither one knew it and Bindy, after seeing the big cock on the snail and how he was fucking clooney in the ass with it and thinking about how much she had enjoyed having her pussy eaten by Clooney, changed sides then and there.

Bindy and Clooney were quite happy as they snuggled against each other, but danger in the form of Corinne a/k/a Corey lurked in the bush, well, not her bush, although it is so long and hairy Lord knows what could be hiding in there!!!

Actually, the danger was to Corey because, although all three of them were now on the same side, at least as far as the land mollusk question was concerned, none of them knew this, being almost as confused as the people posting to this thread.

But someone, somewhere had to take charge, there was too much at risk, too much at stake but, who, who could that person be.........??

Clooney, suddenly realizing he was a super-hero, leaped to his feet to take charge, peeling off his pants to reveal his super-hero costume, less impressive than it might have been because of the snail cum on the seat of his pants. Using his super-hero, super-sized white, sparkling teeth, he grabbed Bindy's pussy hair between his teeth, swinging her round and round and tossing her into a nearby bush, knocking Corinne a/k/a Corey down and falling on top of his/her face, which made Bindy smile and start to gyrate.


Okay, this is everything, including the next post.

 

[Honey123]

deleted

 

[Honey123]

The persistent swish of the windshield wipers was putting Jasmine to sleep as traffic crept along at a snail’s pace. As a snail, Jasmine had never enjoyed traffic very much until today. But last night she had experienced her first multiple and even grid-lock could not get her down. Several days later, Jasmine galloped the final thirty-five inches into the supermarket parking lot and read her employer's shopping list: "Butter, fresh garlic, French bread, escargot..." Her eyes grew wide and she was just opening her mouth to rail about her employer's requests when a large shadow developed overhead and in an instant her life was snubbed out by Prada. Just before she died, she asked "Who is Prada?"

The woman exiting the grocery store swore loudly upon the crunching beneath her shoes and proceeded to smear poor Jasmine's remains along the asphalt to clean her gorgeous and expensive footwear. Jasmine's loss, however, was the ants' gain.

Less than a year ago, the Prada pumps - which were lipstick-red, with a practical yet sexy two-inch "kitten" heel - had been the smooth but intriguingly textured underbelly of a young Australian crocodile we'll call Bruce.

Bruce was slithering along one day, minding his own business when suddenly a beautiful and large breasted blonde leapt from the cattails, landing right on his back and encircling his chest with her arms. Bruce, slightly annoyed by the commotion, stopped dead in his tracks and turned his head to glare at the intruder of his peaceful morning trot.

The hostile blonde wrestled him ashore where, of all things, she began tickling him. Because this, laidies and gentlemen, was not your ordinary run-of-the-mill bimbo, but the fabulous Brenda Busty. Brenda happened to be the now-grown daughter of television's famed Crocodile Hunter, so naturally she was "croc savvy." Formerly known as Bindy, Brenda really knew how to turn on a wily croc.

"Croiky," cried Bruce, "This is dangerously close to a beastiality story."

Brenda laughed and shook her long, luxurious hair as she drew forth a long knife,"You should be so lucky, mate."

Impaling Bruce just below the jaw, Bindy smiled, if only her father knew she hated live crocs with a passion, thinking of how many pairs of shoes a croc this size would produce.

Also keeping in mind that she would have to remove Bruce’s spectacularly engorged bollocks, they were a highly prized and sought after aphrodisiac used to ward off impotency and genital warts, sacred to the people of the Hahaha tribe who were currently claiming squatters rights in the oval office of the Whitehouse.

Where, even as Brenda busily bobbited Bruce, the chief of staff was conferring with an aborigine expert on how they might regain control without creating an international incident.

The chief of staff had the IQ of your average dishwasher.

Meanwhile, back at the supermarket parking lot where the young snail Jasmine had met her demise, the owner of the Prada pumps was in consultation with her attorney and the Snails, Slugs & Slime Trail Antidefamation Society were on the phone with the chief of staff's secretary, Corinne Dubois.

"Listen, Ms. Dubois, I don't give a croc's ass that the chief of staff is busy, put him on the damn phone now." Bending over, the owner of Prada took off her gorgeous pump and scrapped Jasmine's remaining skin and blood onto the edge of the curb.

"Dammit, someone get me a tissue!!" She exclaimed.

The silver remains making a streak across the ground, glittering in the sunlight.

At the White House, Corinne put her hand over the phone and whispered to her boss, "Janet Jackson is on the line for you, sir."

"Hmmm. Tell her I'm busy. Can't you see I'm working, Corinne!" He replied, going back to his crossword puzzle. "Janet Jackson!! What a boob!!"

Corinne glared at her boss. What an absolute idiot, she thought. Glancing down at her Prada shoes, she thought about kicking him. She didn't, though, because she was too concerned about damaging her shoes, which she had affectionately named "Bruce".

She took her hand away from the receiver, "Janet?"

From the other end she hears, "Call me Ms. Jackson if you're nasty!"

"Ah, Okay...." Corinne replied. "Ms. Jackson, Jonathan is quite busy right now..."

"DAMMIT!!!" Ms. Jackson cut her off in midd-sentence. "There is nothing," she shouted into the phone, "As important as stopping the slaughter of innocent snails and slugs by women in expensive shoes!"

She felt a tapping on her shoulder and turned around.

"Excuse me, Miss, but what's that on your shoe?" A man asked her, pointing to the remains of Jasmine.

Meanwhile, back at the supermarket parking lot where the young snail Jasmine had met her demise, the owner of the Prada pumps was in consultation with her attorney and the Snails, Slugs & Slime Trail Antidefamation Society were on the phone with the chief of staff's secretary, Corinne Dubois.

"Listen, Ms. Dubois, I don't give a croc's ass that the chief of staff is busy, put him on the damn phone now." Bending over, the owner of Prada took off her gorgeous pump and scrapped Jasmine's remaining skin and blood onto the edge of the curb.

"Dammit, someone get me a tissue!!" She exclaimed.

The silver remains making a streak across the ground, glittering in the sunlight.

At the White House, Corinne put her hand over the phone and whispered to her boss, "Janet Jackson is on the line for you, sir."

"Hmmm. Tell her I'm busy. Can't you see I'm working, Corinne!" He replied, going back to his crossword puzzle. "Janet Jackson!! What a boob!!"

Corinne glared at her boss. What an absolute idiot, she thought. Glancing down at her Prada shoes, she thought about kicking him. She didn't, though, because she was too concerned about damaging her shoes, which she had affectionately named "Bruce".

She took her hand away from the receiver, "Janet?"

From the other end she hears, "Call me Ms. Jackson if you're nasty!"

"Ah, Okay...." Corinne replied. "Ms. Jackson, Jonathan is quite busy right now..."

"DAMMIT!!!" Ms. Jackson cut her off in midd-sentence. "There is nothing," she shouted into the phone, "As important as stopping the slaughter of innocent snails and slugs by women in expensive shoes!"

She felt a tapping on her shoulder and turned around.

"Excuse me, Miss, but what's that on your shoe?" A man asked her, pointing to the remains of Jasmine.

After exposing one of her boobs to the man and anybody else who might be watching, she replied, "Escargot".

"Bless you!" He replied, quickly revealing to her that he was in fact Agent Two-Penises, sent on a secret mission to infiltrate the almost secret C.U.M society ( Citizenship for Urban Molluscs).

Realizing that she was in the presence of a secret agent of the enemy snail haters league, Janet thought quickly and, after covering her boob, she smiled sweetly.

Hiding the gem incrusted nipple jewellery shaped out of a snail shell looking remarkably similar to Jasmines, she responded, "It's semen from when I kicked Bill Clinton in his crotch when he tried to stick a cigar in my pussy.

Meanwhile, in a secret compound deep beneath the polar ice cap, a woman read pornography on the internet and plotted wicked deeds. Her first order of business was to swap her blind husband's toothpaste out with hair removal cream. The cream, besides its primary function, could also be used to remove the remains of snails or slugs from shoes, and this was considered to be important in the plot to exterminate these creatures.

This, however, was of no concern to him as he gagged and choked at the awful taste of what he assumed was napalm in a tube.

In fact, "Napalm In A Tube" had been one of the few, failed new product introductions by Proctor & Gamble, for whom Corinne Dubois had worked as an assistant to the director of research and development...before "the incident" had taken her to the White House, where she fielded phone calls from breast-exposing, entertainment-industry publicity whores.

The man screamed as he spat the rancid paste into the sink, "Stella, you bitch! What wickedness possesses you to punish me so?" Then he realized that, although he had just performed oral sex on Stella, leaving some of her hair stuck in his teeth, the hair had miraculously disappeared.

As her husband fell to the floor, she heard his screams of dispair, "Stel--la! Stel--la!" She ignored him, though, and continued assembling the incindiary bombs that were to be used against orphanages. She had her orders and needed to work fast so she could get the bombs to someone she only knew as "Bindy". Although nobody knew it at the time, "Bindy" was mean and nasty because of a lack of pornography or smut.

Being brought up in a sex deprived family the only way Bindy was able to feel desire was to hump the crocs she wrestled, the more they moved the more it turned her on.

Bruce was her favorite with his hard skin and bumpy scales, she could reach an orgasm in record time. It wasn't much fun for the crocs, though, because after climaxing, Bindy killed them to make shoes from their hides.

Once Stella was done packaging the bombs, her instructions were to get on the phone with C.U.M. Stella objected to this idea, however, saying, "There's no room for me and them on the phone because it is so small that even I can just barely fit on there."

Stella, you see my dear friends, is the epitome of a dumb blonde. She is so dumb, in fact, that when C. U. M. said to use powder in the bombs, she thought they meant her face powder so that is what she made them of. Fortunately for the snails, the face power worked against the hair removal cream, making them grow in size.

When the bombs went off in the orphanages, they did no damage at all and spread the face powder, increasing the size of all the nearby snails and slugs.

"The C.U.M., where is the C.U.M.!!!", cried the critters. Because C.U.M. was strongly pro-snail, the molllusks wanted to form an alliance to destroy their enemies.

Agent Two-Penises heard their cries of need and immediately rose to the occasion. The agent, named because his penis was as big as two normal sized ones, had just recovered from hearing about an injury to his hero, Bill Clinton.

Meanwhile, on a private jet en route to Milan, George Clooney removed his shirt, stretched and yawned, pondering the meaning of existence as he began to unzip his pants. His thoughts quickly turned to simpler and yet more elemental ponderings as the zipper reached the end of its track. Eyeing his SuperHero costume which was hidden under his slacks, his mind began to develope a plan to not only save the land Mollusks but to put Bindy in her righfull place, in his lap.

"First, I have to stop Stella from blowing up any more orphanages," he decided.

But then he was distracted by a gorgeous blonde stewardess and his thoughts immediately went to her blowing him and the Mile High Club. When he suggested this, however, she said, "George, how could you, I am your mother," and, sure enough, it was the great singer, Rosemary Clooney after extensive plastic surgery. Since she has been dead for quite some time, those nasty snails did a job on her!

Although it is not commonly known, snails are voodoo experts and they had transformed the late ms. Clooney into a zombie, intending to use her to further their aims in Hollywood.

While George and Rosemary took a trip to the bathroom, it seemed that a very large, dark cloud was looming over the jet, making it quite difficult for the pilot to see.

As it got closer, the pilot realized it was not a cloud; it was a huge net, held aloft by giant flying snails, transformed by the face-powder bomb. The plane shook and bucked, quite like Rosemary in the bathroom. George was sitting on the toilet seat; his mother was on his lap, facing him, and his cock was imbedded deeply in her pussy. "Oh, George!" Rosemary cried, "Fuck me, fuck me like a wombat with a 7 inch dildo! I have been dead for a long time and I have really missed your big, hard cock in my cunt!"

While the plane bucked, George stuck his hard, thick cock in Rosemary's dusty and somewhat shrivelled pussy. In and out, he drove it, while fingering his mother's ass.

"Mommy, Oh Mommy," George moaned, "You're ass is so tight! Your cunt is loose but your ass is so tight, I want to fuck you there."

But unfortunately, before he could do that, the door swung open and there stood before them a 20 foot snail, with a 10 foot cock! "I am going to fuck your mother in her ass first," the snail announced. George replied, "Oh, no buddy, you're gonna fuck me first in the ass, then my Mommy!"

"I'm not a mummy, you idiot; I'm a zombie," his mother, rather hearing-impared, said to George.

Meanwhile back at the whitehouse, Agent Two-Penises was alerted to hostile take-over of Super Hero Clooney's plane and immediately stopped jerking-off to find the C.U.M. They weren't hard to find because they were accompanied by twenty foot snails with ten foot penises.

Linking into the Super Hero Radar Center of Super Hero Clooney, Agent Two- Penises, located an odd object flying near the Kennedy Space Center, knowing immediately this was Super Hero Clooney and the 20 foot Snails buy the dick shaped cloud that formed on the screen.


Agent Two-Penises immediately called Corinne Dubois, his assistant and showed her the radar screen to which she replied, "Let 'em eat cake!" and at that moment, Agent Two-Penises knew, not cake, but pussy!!!

"This is really good," he said, licking Corinne's fresh pussy juices off his lips, then diving back to enclose her clit in his mouth.

But little did Agent Two-Penises know that Corinne had smoothed the "cream" all over her clit, and as his licks became slower, she pushed his head in deeper to her pussy and as she reached her orgasm she yelled, "Viva La C.U.M.!!!" Unknown to the government, Corinne had been a secrent agent of C.U.M. all along but now she had to cum out in the open.

As Corinne kicked Two-Penises aside with her red Prada shoes, she picked up the telephone and made a direct call to Bindy. "Bindy, I have just ruined my shoes kicking a bad guy so you are going to have to kill some more crocodiles to make more."

To which Bindy replied, "Corinne, it will be my pleasure, mate, I haven't had a good orgasm since my Bruce bucked and shook under me."

Corinne was aware that Bindy was a member of the dastardly Snail Haters League, but she really need shoes and, as she said, "First things first." The one thing Corinne believed in was, whether in sex or in life, she always CAME first, and if she had to play both sides of the fence, dammit, she'd do it! This was especially so when it came to her shoe wardrobe.

"Corinne," Bindy continued. "Ever do a woman? I have only ever done crocs, male or female, and I have always wondered about eating a hot pussy like yours, or having mine eaten."

Corinne paused for a moment, not quite sure if at this time she should tell Bindy that she was a cross-dresser, a male who loved wearing woman's clothes, especialy red Prada shoes. Being a heterosexual who liked wearing women's clothing, Corinne thought happily about eating Bindy's pussy but she wondered about what Bindy would do when she realized she had been tricked, especially considering how handy Bindy was with her knife.

"Bindy,' Corey said, "it would be my pleasure to eat you, as I always wondered what an Aussy Pussy would taste like."

"Well, why don't you come on down under to go down under on me and you will find out." With that Bindy hung up the phone and feeling a bit excited and horny, went outside to look for the biggest, scaliest croc in the pond and when she found him, she road him, rubbing her Aussy pussy against him until she came, screaming, "Yes! Yes.......I'm cummmmmmmmmmmmminnnnnnnnnnng!"

Meanwhile, Super Hero Clooney and the twenty foot snails were still roaming the sky, Clooney being fucked up the ass, as he ate out the woman in front of him who he thought was his mother, but was actually his AUNT Rosemary, she raised him as her own and had never told him his mother gave him up at birth. As Clooney was being fucked in the ass by the twenty foot snail and eating out his Mother/Aunt Rosemary, this firey threesome had no idea that the plane was descending toward the ground in a frightfully fast way!!! The added weight of the giant snails, combined with the violent motion in one of the bathrooms and adjacent aisle, had caused the pilot to almost lose control, but he was skillfully managing to land it near a large pond in Australia.

When the plane landed, Clooney staggered out and seeing a woman, was immediately enraptured by Bindy, who, after the delightful orgasm she'd just had, was lying with her legs open and her eyes closed. Stroking her well worn-out croc and smiling.

Of course the cock.. err.. croc being stroked was dead, for Bindy had killed him in the height of her orgasm, as was her habit. Clooney ignored the dead croc because he only had eyes for Bindy's hot, dripping pussy and he was seized with a strong urge to get on his knees between her legs and bury his face in it.

But before he could, Bindy opened her eyes and said, "Hey, mate, iis that a snail in your pocket or are you happy to see me?"

"I'm happy to see you but never mind that just now because I want to spend the next several hours eating your marvelous pussy."

Just then, Bindy's eyes were drawn to the 20 foot snail behind Clooney, and she fainted. Having led a rather isolated life, she had never seen a real cock before so the ten foot long one imbedded in Clooney's ass was something of a shock. Actually, shock is such a small word to describe what actually happened to Bindy, and coming right after her orgasm too.

Clooney was such an egotist that he thought that Bindy had fainted at the sight of his glorious handsomeness. His Glorious Handsomeness trotted over to Bindy and buried his face in her luxurious, flowing hair. Bindy had never trimmed her pubic hair which was why it was long and flowing. He fumbled around for some time and then finally reached the ultimate prize. Clooney drew her luscious clit into his mouth and started sucking on the sweet love toy, while his tongue caressed the engorged top and sides. Clooney licked and sucked at Bindy's clit, once in a while spitting out some long hair that would stick in his teeth. The hair irritated his eyes and his face too, so Clooney finally gave up on clit-sucking. He then decided that he would take his Pride & Joy and shove it up Bindy's pussy and not so gently, which woke her up instantly and she rode him like a croc and we all know what happens to cocks...err crocs when Bindy rides 'em. Fortunately for Clooney, the super hero suit that he was wearing beneath his clothing deflected her knife.

Once Bindy woke up from her dazed orgasmic fainting spell, she realized whatshe was doing and saw Glorious Handsomeness before her, bleeding and whimpering in pain, "Ouchy! Ouchy!" whimpered Clooney, "that smarts!"

Being on opposite sides of the land mollusk question, Bindy and Clooney were mortal enemies but, because of the secretiveness of both organizations and the confusion and weirdness of this thread, neither one knew it and Bindy, after seeing the big cock on the snail and how he was fucking clooney in the ass with it and thinking about how much she had enjoyed having her pussy eaten by Clooney, changed sides then and there.

Bindy and Clooney were quite happy as they snuggled against each other, but danger in the form of Corinne a/k/a Corey lurked in the bush, well, not her bush, although it is so long and hairy Lord knows what could be hiding in there!!!

Actually, the danger was to Corey because, although all three of them were now on the same side, at least as far as the land mollusk question was concerned, none of them knew this, being almost as confused as the people posting to this thread.

But someone, somewhere had to take charge, there was too much at risk, too much at stake but, who, who could that person be.........??

Clooney, suddenly realizing he was a super-hero, leaped to his feet to take charge, peeling off his pants to reveal his super-hero costume, less impressive than it might have been because of the snail cum on the seat of his pants. Using his super-hero, super-sized white, sparkling teeth, he grabbed Bindy's pussy hair between his teeth, swinging her round and round and tossing her into a nearby bush, knocking Corinne a/k/a Corey down and falling on top of his/her face, which made Bindy smile and start to gyrate.

While Bindy's face was in Corinne/Corey's lap, she felt an incredibly large bulge, to which she unzip the trousers and out popped the most beautiful cock she had every seen.

 

[Boxlicker101]

The persistent swish of the windshield wipers was putting Jasmine to sleep as traffic crept along at a snail’s pace. As a snail, Jasmine had never enjoyed traffic very much until today. But last night she had experienced her first multiple and even grid-lock could not get her down. Several days later, Jasmine galloped the final thirty-five inches into the supermarket parking lot and read her employer's shopping list: "Butter, fresh garlic, French bread, escargot..." Her eyes grew wide and she was just opening her mouth to rail about her employer's requests when a large shadow developed overhead and in an instant her life was snubbed out by Prada. Just before she died, she asked "Who is Prada?"

The woman exiting the grocery store swore loudly upon the crunching beneath her shoes and proceeded to smear poor Jasmine's remains along the asphalt to clean her gorgeous and expensive footwear. Jasmine's loss, however, was the ants' gain.

Less than a year ago, the Prada pumps - which were lipstick-red, with a practical yet sexy two-inch "kitten" heel - had been the smooth but intriguingly textured underbelly of a young Australian crocodile we'll call Bruce.

Bruce was slithering along one day, minding his own business when suddenly a beautiful and large breasted blonde leapt from the cattails, landing right on his back and encircling his chest with her arms. Bruce, slightly annoyed by the commotion, stopped dead in his tracks and turned his head to glare at the intruder of his peaceful morning trot.

The hostile blonde wrestled him ashore where, of all things, she began tickling him. Because this, laidies and gentlemen, was not your ordinary run-of-the-mill bimbo, but the fabulous Brenda Busty. Brenda happened to be the now-grown daughter of television's famed Crocodile Hunter, so naturally she was "croc savvy." Formerly known as Bindy, Brenda really knew how to turn on a wily croc.

"Croiky," cried Bruce, "This is dangerously close to a beastiality story."

Brenda laughed and shook her long, luxurious hair as she drew forth a long knife,"You should be so lucky, mate."

Impaling Bruce just below the jaw, Bindy smiled, if only her father knew she hated live crocs with a passion, thinking of how many pairs of shoes a croc this size would produce.

Also keeping in mind that she would have to remove Bruce’s spectacularly engorged bollocks, they were a highly prized and sought after aphrodisiac used to ward off impotency and genital warts, sacred to the people of the Hahaha tribe who were currently claiming squatters rights in the oval office of the Whitehouse.

Where, even as Brenda busily bobbited Bruce, the chief of staff was conferring with an aborigine expert on how they might regain control without creating an international incident.

The chief of staff had the IQ of your average dishwasher.

Meanwhile, back at the supermarket parking lot where the young snail Jasmine had met her demise, the owner of the Prada pumps was in consultation with her attorney and the Snails, Slugs & Slime Trail Antidefamation Society were on the phone with the chief of staff's secretary, Corinne Dubois.

"Listen, Ms. Dubois, I don't give a croc's ass that the chief of staff is busy, put him on the damn phone now." Bending over, the owner of Prada took off her gorgeous pump and scrapped Jasmine's remaining skin and blood onto the edge of the curb.

"Dammit, someone get me a tissue!!" She exclaimed.

The silver remains making a streak across the ground, glittering in the sunlight.

At the White House, Corinne put her hand over the phone and whispered to her boss, "Janet Jackson is on the line for you, sir."

"Hmmm. Tell her I'm busy. Can't you see I'm working, Corinne!" He replied, going back to his crossword puzzle. "Janet Jackson!! What a boob!!"

Corinne glared at her boss. What an absolute idiot, she thought. Glancing down at her Prada shoes, she thought about kicking him. She didn't, though, because she was too concerned about damaging her shoes, which she had affectionately named "Bruce".

She took her hand away from the receiver, "Janet?"

From the other end she hears, "Call me Ms. Jackson if you're nasty!"

"Ah, Okay...." Corinne replied. "Ms. Jackson, Jonathan is quite busy right now..."

"DAMMIT!!!" Ms. Jackson cut her off in midd-sentence. "There is nothing," she shouted into the phone, "As important as stopping the slaughter of innocent snails and slugs by women in expensive shoes!"

She felt a tapping on her shoulder and turned around.

"Excuse me, Miss, but what's that on your shoe?" A man asked her, pointing to the remains of Jasmine.

Meanwhile, back at the supermarket parking lot where the young snail Jasmine had met her demise, the owner of the Prada pumps was in consultation with her attorney and the Snails, Slugs & Slime Trail Antidefamation Society were on the phone with the chief of staff's secretary, Corinne Dubois.

"Listen, Ms. Dubois, I don't give a croc's ass that the chief of staff is busy, put him on the damn phone now." Bending over, the owner of Prada took off her gorgeous pump and scrapped Jasmine's remaining skin and blood onto the edge of the curb.

"Dammit, someone get me a tissue!!" She exclaimed.

The silver remains making a streak across the ground, glittering in the sunlight.

At the White House, Corinne put her hand over the phone and whispered to her boss, "Janet Jackson is on the line for you, sir."

"Hmmm. Tell her I'm busy. Can't you see I'm working, Corinne!" He replied, going back to his crossword puzzle. "Janet Jackson!! What a boob!!"

Corinne glared at her boss. What an absolute idiot, she thought. Glancing down at her Prada shoes, she thought about kicking him. She didn't, though, because she was too concerned about damaging her shoes, which she had affectionately named "Bruce".

She took her hand away from the receiver, "Janet?"

From the other end she hears, "Call me Ms. Jackson if you're nasty!"

"Ah, Okay...." Corinne replied. "Ms. Jackson, Jonathan is quite busy right now..."

"DAMMIT!!!" Ms. Jackson cut her off in midd-sentence. "There is nothing," she shouted into the phone, "As important as stopping the slaughter of innocent snails and slugs by women in expensive shoes!"

She felt a tapping on her shoulder and turned around.

"Excuse me, Miss, but what's that on your shoe?" A man asked her, pointing to the remains of Jasmine.

After exposing one of her boobs to the man and anybody else who might be watching, she replied, "Escargot".

"Bless you!" He replied, quickly revealing to her that he was in fact Agent Two-Penises, sent on a secret mission to infiltrate the almost secret C.U.M society ( Citizenship for Urban Molluscs).

Realizing that she was in the presence of a secret agent of the enemy snail haters league, Janet thought quickly and, after covering her boob, she smiled sweetly.

Hiding the gem incrusted nipple jewellery shaped out of a snail shell looking remarkably similar to Jasmines, she responded, "It's semen from when I kicked Bill Clinton in his crotch when he tried to stick a cigar in my pussy.

Meanwhile, in a secret compound deep beneath the polar ice cap, a woman read pornography on the internet and plotted wicked deeds. Her first order of business was to swap her blind husband's toothpaste out with hair removal cream. The cream, besides its primary function, could also be used to remove the remains of snails or slugs from shoes, and this was considered to be important in the plot to exterminate these creatures.

This, however, was of no concern to him as he gagged and choked at the awful taste of what he assumed was napalm in a tube.

In fact, "Napalm In A Tube" had been one of the few, failed new product introductions by Proctor & Gamble, for whom Corinne Dubois had worked as an assistant to the director of research and development...before "the incident" had taken her to the White House, where she fielded phone calls from breast-exposing, entertainment-industry publicity whores.

The man screamed as he spat the rancid paste into the sink, "Stella, you bitch! What wickedness possesses you to punish me so?" Then he realized that, although he had just performed oral sex on Stella, leaving some of her hair stuck in his teeth, the hair had miraculously disappeared.

As her husband fell to the floor, she heard his screams of dispair, "Stel--la! Stel--la!" She ignored him, though, and continued assembling the incindiary bombs that were to be used against orphanages. She had her orders and needed to work fast so she could get the bombs to someone she only knew as "Bindy". Although nobody knew it at the time, "Bindy" was mean and nasty because of a lack of pornography or smut.

Being brought up in a sex deprived family the only way Bindy was able to feel desire was to hump the crocs she wrestled, the more they moved the more it turned her on.

Bruce was her favorite with his hard skin and bumpy scales, she could reach an orgasm in record time. It wasn't much fun for the crocs, though, because after climaxing, Bindy killed them to make shoes from their hides.

Once Stella was done packaging the bombs, her instructions were to get on the phone with C.U.M. Stella objected to this idea, however, saying, "There's no room for me and them on the phone because it is so small that even I can just barely fit on there."

Stella, you see my dear friends, is the epitome of a dumb blonde. She is so dumb, in fact, that when C. U. M. said to use powder in the bombs, she thought they meant her face powder so that is what she made them of. Fortunately for the snails, the face power worked against the hair removal cream, making them grow in size.

When the bombs went off in the orphanages, they did no damage at all and spread the face powder, increasing the size of all the nearby snails and slugs.

"The C.U.M., where is the C.U.M.!!!", cried the critters. Because C.U.M. was strongly pro-snail, the molllusks wanted to form an alliance to destroy their enemies.

Agent Two-Penises heard their cries of need and immediately rose to the occasion. The agent, named because his penis was as big as two normal sized ones, had just recovered from hearing about an injury to his hero, Bill Clinton.

Meanwhile, on a private jet en route to Milan, George Clooney removed his shirt, stretched and yawned, pondering the meaning of existence as he began to unzip his pants. His thoughts quickly turned to simpler and yet more elemental ponderings as the zipper reached the end of its track. Eyeing his SuperHero costume which was hidden under his slacks, his mind began to develope a plan to not only save the land Mollusks but to put Bindy in her righfull place, in his lap.

"First, I have to stop Stella from blowing up any more orphanages," he decided.

But then he was distracted by a gorgeous blonde stewardess and his thoughts immediately went to her blowing him and the Mile High Club. When he suggested this, however, she said, "George, how could you, I am your mother," and, sure enough, it was the great singer, Rosemary Clooney after extensive plastic surgery. Since she has been dead for quite some time, those nasty snails did a job on her!

Although it is not commonly known, snails are voodoo experts and they had transformed the late ms. Clooney into a zombie, intending to use her to further their aims in Hollywood.

While George and Rosemary took a trip to the bathroom, it seemed that a very large, dark cloud was looming over the jet, making it quite difficult for the pilot to see.

As it got closer, the pilot realized it was not a cloud; it was a huge net, held aloft by giant flying snails, transformed by the face-powder bomb. The plane shook and bucked, quite like Rosemary in the bathroom. George was sitting on the toilet seat; his mother was on his lap, facing him, and his cock was imbedded deeply in her pussy. "Oh, George!" Rosemary cried, "Fuck me, fuck me like a wombat with a 7 inch dildo! I have been dead for a long time and I have really missed your big, hard cock in my cunt!"

While the plane bucked, George stuck his hard, thick cock in Rosemary's dusty and somewhat shrivelled pussy. In and out, he drove it, while fingering his mother's ass.

"Mommy, Oh Mommy," George moaned, "You're ass is so tight! Your cunt is loose but your ass is so tight, I want to fuck you there."

But unfortunately, before he could do that, the door swung open and there stood before them a 20 foot snail, with a 10 foot cock! "I am going to fuck your mother in her ass first," the snail announced. George replied, "Oh, no buddy, you're gonna fuck me first in the ass, then my Mommy!"

"I'm not a mummy, you idiot; I'm a zombie," his mother, rather hearing-impared, said to George.

Meanwhile back at the whitehouse, Agent Two-Penises was alerted to hostile take-over of Super Hero Clooney's plane and immediately stopped jerking-off to find the C.U.M. They weren't hard to find because they were accompanied by twenty foot snails with ten foot penises.

Linking into the Super Hero Radar Center of Super Hero Clooney, Agent Two- Penises, located an odd object flying near the Kennedy Space Center, knowing immediately this was Super Hero Clooney and the 20 foot Snails buy the dick shaped cloud that formed on the screen.


Agent Two-Penises immediately called Corinne Dubois, his assistant and showed her the radar screen to which she replied, "Let 'em eat cake!" and at that moment, Agent Two-Penises knew, not cake, but pussy!!!

"This is really good," he said, licking Corinne's fresh pussy juices off his lips, then diving back to enclose her clit in his mouth.

But little did Agent Two-Penises know that Corinne had smoothed the "cream" all over her clit, and as his licks became slower, she pushed his head in deeper to her pussy and as she reached her orgasm she yelled, "Viva La C.U.M.!!!" Unknown to the government, Corinne had been a secrent agent of C.U.M. all along but now she had to cum out in the open.

As Corinne kicked Two-Penises aside with her red Prada shoes, she picked up the telephone and made a direct call to Bindy. "Bindy, I have just ruined my shoes kicking a bad guy so you are going to have to kill some more crocodiles to make more."

To which Bindy replied, "Corinne, it will be my pleasure, mate, I haven't had a good orgasm since my Bruce bucked and shook under me."

Corinne was aware that Bindy was a member of the dastardly Snail Haters League, but she really need shoes and, as she said, "First things first." The one thing Corinne believed in was, whether in sex or in life, she always CAME first, and if she had to play both sides of the fence, dammit, she'd do it! This was especially so when it came to her shoe wardrobe.

"Corinne," Bindy continued. "Ever do a woman? I have only ever done crocs, male or female, and I have always wondered about eating a hot pussy like yours, or having mine eaten."

Corinne paused for a moment, not quite sure if at this time she should tell Bindy that she was a cross-dresser, a male who loved wearing woman's clothes, especialy red Prada shoes. Being a heterosexual who liked wearing women's clothing, Corinne thought happily about eating Bindy's pussy but she wondered about what Bindy would do when she realized she had been tricked, especially considering how handy Bindy was with her knife.

"Bindy,' Corey said, "it would be my pleasure to eat you, as I always wondered what an Aussy Pussy would taste like."

"Well, why don't you come on down under to go down under on me and you will find out." With that Bindy hung up the phone and feeling a bit excited and horny, went outside to look for the biggest, scaliest croc in the pond and when she found him, she road him, rubbing her Aussy pussy against him until she came, screaming, "Yes! Yes.......I'm cummmmmmmmmmmmminnnnnnnnnnng!"

Meanwhile, Super Hero Clooney and the twenty foot snails were still roaming the sky, Clooney being fucked up the ass, as he ate out the woman in front of him who he thought was his mother, but was actually his AUNT Rosemary, she raised him as her own and had never told him his mother gave him up at birth. As Clooney was being fucked in the ass by the twenty foot snail and eating out his Mother/Aunt Rosemary, this firey threesome had no idea that the plane was descending toward the ground in a frightfully fast way!!! The added weight of the giant snails, combined with the violent motion in one of the bathrooms and adjacent aisle, had caused the pilot to almost lose control, but he was skillfully managing to land it near a large pond in Australia.

When the plane landed, Clooney staggered out and seeing a woman, was immediately enraptured by Bindy, who, after the delightful orgasm she'd just had, was lying with her legs open and her eyes closed. Stroking her well worn-out croc and smiling.

Of course the cock.. err.. croc being stroked was dead, for Bindy had killed him in the height of her orgasm, as was her habit. Clooney ignored the dead croc because he only had eyes for Bindy's hot, dripping pussy and he was seized with a strong urge to get on his knees between her legs and bury his face in it.

But before he could, Bindy opened her eyes and said, "Hey, mate, iis that a snail in your pocket or are you happy to see me?"

"I'm happy to see you but never mind that just now because I want to spend the next several hours eating your marvelous pussy."

Just then, Bindy's eyes were drawn to the 20 foot snail behind Clooney, and she fainted. Having led a rather isolated life, she had never seen a real cock before so the ten foot long one imbedded in Clooney's ass was something of a shock. Actually, shock is such a small word to describe what actually happened to Bindy, and coming right after her orgasm too.

Clooney was such an egotist that he thought that Bindy had fainted at the sight of his glorious handsomeness. His Glorious Handsomeness trotted over to Bindy and buried his face in her luxurious, flowing hair. Bindy had never trimmed her pubic hair which was why it was long and flowing. He fumbled around for some time and then finally reached the ultimate prize. Clooney drew her luscious clit into his mouth and started sucking on the sweet love toy, while his tongue caressed the engorged top and sides. Clooney licked and sucked at Bindy's clit, once in a while spitting out some long hair that would stick in his teeth. The hair irritated his eyes and his face too, so Clooney finally gave up on clit-sucking. He then decided that he would take his Pride & Joy and shove it up Bindy's pussy and not so gently, which woke her up instantly and she rode him like a croc and we all know what happens to cocks...err crocs when Bindy rides 'em. Fortunately for Clooney, the super hero suit that he was wearing beneath his clothing deflected her knife.

Once Bindy woke up from her dazed orgasmic fainting spell, she realized whatshe was doing and saw Glorious Handsomeness before her, bleeding and whimpering in pain, "Ouchy! Ouchy!" whimpered Clooney, "that smarts!"

Being on opposite sides of the land mollusk question, Bindy and Clooney were mortal enemies but, because of the secretiveness of both organizations and the confusion and weirdness of this thread, neither one knew it and Bindy, after seeing the big cock on the snail and how he was fucking clooney in the ass with it and thinking about how much she had enjoyed having her pussy eaten by Clooney, changed sides then and there.

Bindy and Clooney were quite happy as they snuggled against each other, but danger in the form of Corinne a/k/a Corey lurked in the bush, well, not her bush, although it is so long and hairy Lord knows what could be hiding in there!!!

Actually, the danger was to Corey because, although all three of them were now on the same side, at least as far as the land mollusk question was concerned, none of them knew this, being almost as confused as the people posting to this thread.

But someone, somewhere had to take charge, there was too much at risk, too much at stake but, who, who could that person be.........??

Clooney, suddenly realizing he was a super-hero, leaped to his feet to take charge, peeling off his pants to reveal his super-hero costume, less impressive than it might have been because of the snail cum on the seat of his pants. Using his super-hero, super-sized white, sparkling teeth, he grabbed Bindy's pussy hair between his teeth, swinging her round and round and tossing her into a nearby bush, knocking Corinne a/k/a Corey down and falling on top of his/her face, which made Bindy smile and start to gyrate.

While Bindy's face was in Corinne/Corey's lap, she felt an incredibly large bulge, to which she unzip the trousers and out popped the most beautiful cock she had every seen. Although it was somewhat smaller than the snail cock she had admired earlier, it was perfectly shaped and she happily took it into her mouth while grinding her pussy on the face of the very fortunate Corey DuBois

 

[damppanties]

Of course the cock.. err.. croc being stroked was dead, for Bindy had killed him in the height of her orgasm, as was her habit. Clooney ignored the dead croc because he only had eyes for Bindy's hot, dripping pussy and he was seized with a strong urge to get on his knees between her legs and bury his face in it.

But before he could, Bindy opened her eyes and said, "Hey, mate, iis that a snail in your pocket or are you happy to see me?"

"I'm happy to see you but never mind that just now because I want to spend the next several hours eating your marvelous pussy."

Just then, Bindy's eyes were drawn to the 20 foot snail behind Clooney, and she fainted. Having led a rather isolated life, she had never seen a real cock before so the ten foot long one imbedded in Clooney's ass was something of a shock. Actually, shock is such a small word to describe what actually happened to Bindy, and coming right after her orgasm too.

Clooney was such an egotist that he thought that Bindy had fainted at the sight of his glorious handsomeness. His Glorious Handsomeness trotted over to Bindy and buried his face in her luxurious, flowing hair. Bindy had never trimmed her pubic hair which was why it was long and flowing. He fumbled around for some time and then finally reached the ultimate prize. Clooney drew her luscious clit into his mouth and started sucking on the sweet love toy, while his tongue caressed the engorged top and sides. Clooney licked and sucked at Bindy's clit, once in a while spitting out some long hair that would stick in his teeth. The hair irritated his eyes and his face too, so Clooney finally gave up on clit-sucking. He then decided that he would take his Pride & Joy and shove it up Bindy's pussy and not so gently, which woke her up instantly and she rode him like a croc and we all know what happens to cocks...err crocs when Bindy rides 'em. Fortunately for Clooney, the super hero suit that he was wearing beneath his clothing deflected her knife.

Once Bindy woke up from her dazed orgasmic fainting spell, she realized what she was doing and saw Glorious Handsomeness before her, bleeding and whimpering in pain, "Ouchy! Ouchy!" whimpered Clooney, "that smarts!"

Being on opposite sides of the land mollusk question, Bindy and Clooney were mortal enemies but, because of the secretiveness of both organizations and the confusion and weirdness of this thread, neither one knew it and Bindy, after seeing the big cock on the snail and how he was fucking clooney in the ass with it and thinking about how much she had enjoyed having her pussy eaten by Clooney, changed sides then and there.

Bindy and Clooney were quite happy as they snuggled against each other, but danger in the form of Corinne a/k/a Corey lurked in the bush, well, not her bush, although it is so long and hairy Lord knows what could be hiding in there!!!

Actually, the danger was to Corey because, although all three of them were now on the same side, at least as far as the land mollusk question was concerned, none of them knew this, being almost as confused as the people posting to this thread.

But someone, somewhere had to take charge, there was too much at risk, too much at stake but, who, who could that person be.........??

Clooney, suddenly realizing he was a super-hero, leaped to his feet to take charge, peeling off his pants to reveal his super-hero costume, less impressive than it might have been because of the snail cum on the seat of his pants. Using his super-hero, super-sized white, sparkling teeth, he grabbed Bindy's pussy hair between his teeth, swinging her round and round and tossing her into a nearby bush, knocking Corinne a/k/a Corey down and falling on top of his/her face, which made Bindy smile and start to gyrate.

While Bindy's face was in Corinne/Corey's lap, she felt an incredibly large bulge, to which she unzip the trousers and out popped the most beautiful cock she had ever seen. Although it was somewhat smaller than the snail's cock she had admired earlier, it was perfectly shaped and she happily took it into her mouth while grinding her pussy on the face of the very fortunate Corey DuBois.

Clooney yelled, "AAAAaaaaaaAAAAAAaaaaAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAA," (like Tarzan), then thumped his chest with his fists and jumped into the orgy.

 

[SensualCealy]

Leaping into action Clooney slipped between Bindy's thighs, parted her pubic hair and tied it behind her back, making access to her delicious mound much easier.

 

[damppanties]

Actually, the danger was to Corey because, although all three of them were now on the same side, at least as far as the land mollusk question was concerned, none of them knew this, being almost as confused as the people posting to this thread.

But someone, somewhere had to take charge, there was too much at risk, too much at stake but, who, who could that person be.........??

Clooney, suddenly realizing he was a super-hero, leaped to his feet to take charge, peeling off his pants to reveal his super-hero costume, less impressive than it might have been because of the snail cum on the seat of his pants. Using his super-hero, super-sized white, sparkling teeth, he grabbed Bindy's pussy hair between his teeth, swinging her round and round and tossing her into a nearby bush, knocking Corinne a/k/a Corey down and falling on top of his/her face, which made Bindy smile and start to gyrate.

While Bindy's face was in Corinne/Corey's lap, she felt an incredibly large bulge, to which she unzip the trousers and out popped the most beautiful cock she had ever seen. Although it was somewhat smaller than the snail's cock she had admired earlier, it was perfectly shaped and she happily took it into her mouth while grinding her pussy on the face of the very fortunate Corey DuBois.

Clooney yelled, "AAAAaaaaaaAAAAAAaaaaAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAA," (like Tarzan), then thumped his chest with his fists and jumped into the orgy. Leaping into action Clooney slipped between Bindy's thighs, parted her pubic hair and tied it behind her back, making access to her delicious mound much easier.

But then, he was sidetracked with plaiting the long pubic hair neatly; he was just that type of a guy - compulsively obsessive and orderly.

 

[Honey123]

Actually, the danger was to Corey because, although all three of them were now on the same side, at least as far as the land mollusk question was concerned, none of them knew this, being almost as confused as the people posting to this thread.

But someone, somewhere had to take charge, there was too much at risk, too much at stake but, who, who could that person be.........??

Clooney, suddenly realizing he was a super-hero, leaped to his feet to take charge, peeling off his pants to reveal his super-hero costume, less impressive than it might have been because of the snail cum on the seat of his pants. Using his super-hero, super-sized white, sparkling teeth, he grabbed Bindy's pussy hair between his teeth, swinging her round and round and tossing her into a nearby bush, knocking Corinne a/k/a Corey down and falling on top of his/her face, which made Bindy smile and start to gyrate.

While Bindy's face was in Corinne/Corey's lap, she felt an incredibly large bulge, to which she unzip the trousers and out popped the most beautiful cock she had ever seen. Although it was somewhat smaller than the snail's cock she had admired earlier, it was perfectly shaped and she happily took it into her mouth while grinding her pussy on the face of the very fortunate Corey DuBois.

Clooney yelled, "AAAAaaaaaaAAAAAAaaaaAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAA," (like Tarzan), then thumped his chest with his fists and jumped into the orgy. Leaping into action Clooney slipped between Bindy's thighs, parted her pubic hair and tied it behind her back, making access to her delicious mound much easier.

But then, he was sidetracked with plaiting the long pubic hair neatly; he was just that type of a guy - compulsively obsessive and orderly. Being the Metro-Sexual guy that we all know he is, he continually braided and unbraided Bindy's public hair until he got it right, and he got it right alright, but as he admired what he did, he realized it looked a bit like Willie Nelson, then thought, 'What the hell, bet the ol' geezer never had a perfect cock in his mouth' and with that he shoved it in, humming one of Willie's songs.

 

[damppanties]

Actually, the danger was to Corey because, although all three of them were now on the same side, at least as far as the land mollusk question was concerned, none of them knew this, being almost as confused as the people posting to this thread.

But someone, somewhere had to take charge, there was too much at risk, too much at stake but, who, who could that person be.........??

Clooney, suddenly realizing he was a super-hero, leaped to his feet to take charge, peeling off his pants to reveal his super-hero costume, less impressive than it might have been because of the snail cum on the seat of his pants. Using his super-hero, super-sized white, sparkling teeth, he grabbed Bindy's pussy hair between his teeth, swinging her round and round and tossing her into a nearby bush, knocking Corinne a/k/a Corey down and falling on top of his/her face, which made Bindy smile and start to gyrate.

While Bindy's face was in Corinne/Corey's lap, she felt an incredibly large bulge, to which she unzip the trousers and out popped the most beautiful cock she had ever seen. Although it was somewhat smaller than the snail's cock she had admired earlier, it was perfectly shaped and she happily took it into her mouth while grinding her pussy on the face of the very fortunate Corey DuBois.

Clooney yelled, "AAAAaaaaaaAAAAAAaaaaAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAA," (like Tarzan), then thumped his chest with his fists and jumped into the orgy. Leaping into action Clooney slipped between Bindy's thighs, parted her pubic hair and tied it behind her back, making access to her delicious mound much easier.

But then, he was sidetracked with plaiting the long pubic hair neatly; he was just that type of a guy - compulsively obsessive and orderly. Being the Metro-Sexual guy that we all know he is, he continually braided and unbraided Bindy's public hair until he got it right, and he got it right alright, but as he admired what he did, he realized it looked a bit like Willie Nelson, then thought, 'What the hell, bet the ol' geezer never had a perfect cock in his mouth' and with that he shoved it in, humming one of Willie's songs.

Behind Clooney, the croc's ghost rose, like a phoenix, from the dead body and with one look at the spectacle before it, started weeping copious tears - crocodile tears.

 

[Honey123]

Actually, the danger was to Corey because, although all three of them were now on the same side, at least as far as the land mollusk question was concerned, none of them knew this, being almost as confused as the people posting to this thread.

But someone, somewhere had to take charge, there was too much at risk, too much at stake but, who, who could that person be.........??

Clooney, suddenly realizing he was a super-hero, leaped to his feet to take charge, peeling off his pants to reveal his super-hero costume, less impressive than it might have been because of the snail cum on the seat of his pants. Using his super-hero, super-sized white, sparkling teeth, he grabbed Bindy's pussy hair between his teeth, swinging her round and round and tossing her into a nearby bush, knocking Corinne a/k/a Corey down and falling on top of his/her face, which made Bindy smile and start to gyrate.

While Bindy's face was in Corinne/Corey's lap, she felt an incredibly large bulge, to which she unzip the trousers and out popped the most beautiful cock she had ever seen. Although it was somewhat smaller than the snail's cock she had admired earlier, it was perfectly shaped and she happily took it into her mouth while grinding her pussy on the face of the very fortunate Corey DuBois.

Clooney yelled, "AAAAaaaaaaAAAAAAaaaaAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAA," (like Tarzan), then thumped his chest with his fists and jumped into the orgy. Leaping into action Clooney slipped between Bindy's thighs, parted her pubic hair and tied it behind her back, making access to her delicious mound much easier.

But then, he was sidetracked with plaiting the long pubic hair neatly; he was just that type of a guy - compulsively obsessive and orderly. Being the Metro-Sexual guy that we all know he is, he continually braided and unbraided Bindy's public hair until he got it right, and he got it right alright, but as he admired what he did, he realized it looked a bit like Willie Nelson, then thought, 'What the hell, bet the ol' geezer never had a perfect cock in his mouth' and with that he shoved it in, humming one of Willie's songs.

Behind Clooney, the croc's ghost rose, like a phoenix, from the dead body and with one look at the spectacle before it, started weeping copious tears - crocodile tears.

Humming, On the Road Again, Clooney was unaware that the Croc's Ghost was lumming above him, until he felt droplets of tears upon his neck, turning around, Clooney paled at the sight before him and screamed, quite like a girl.

 

[damppanties]

Actually, the danger was to Corey because, although all three of them were now on the same side, at least as far as the land mollusk question was concerned, none of them knew this, being almost as confused as the people posting to this thread.

But someone, somewhere had to take charge, there was too much at risk, too much at stake but, who, who could that person be.........??

Clooney, suddenly realizing he was a super-hero, leaped to his feet to take charge, peeling off his pants to reveal his super-hero costume, less impressive than it might have been because of the snail cum on the seat of his pants. Using his super-hero, super-sized white, sparkling teeth, he grabbed Bindy's pussy hair between his teeth, swinging her round and round and tossing her into a nearby bush, knocking Corinne a/k/a Corey down and falling on top of his/her face, which made Bindy smile and start to gyrate.

While Bindy's face was in Corinne/Corey's lap, she felt an incredibly large bulge, to which she unzip the trousers and out popped the most beautiful cock she had ever seen. Although it was somewhat smaller than the snail's cock she had admired earlier, it was perfectly shaped and she happily took it into her mouth while grinding her pussy on the face of the very fortunate Corey DuBois.

Clooney yelled, "AAAAaaaaaaAAAAAAaaaaAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAA," (like Tarzan), then thumped his chest with his fists and jumped into the orgy. Leaping into action Clooney slipped between Bindy's thighs, parted her pubic hair and tied it behind her back, making access to her delicious mound much easier.

But then, he was sidetracked with plaiting the long pubic hair neatly; he was just that type of a guy - compulsively obsessive and orderly. Being the Metro-Sexual guy that we all know he is, he continually braided and unbraided Bindy's public hair until he got it right, and he got it right alright, but as he admired what he did, he realized it looked a bit like Willie Nelson, then thought, 'What the hell, bet the ol' geezer never had a perfect cock in his mouth' and with that he shoved it in, humming one of Willie's songs.

Behind Clooney, the croc's ghost rose, like a phoenix, from the dead body and with one look at the spectacle before it, started weeping copious tears - crocodile tears. Humming, On the Road Again, Clooney was unaware that the Croc's Ghost was lumming above him, until he felt droplets of tears upon his neck, turning around, Clooney paled at the sight before him and screamed, quite like a girl.

Except, not exactly - it was more like a transsexual person who had just had a sex change operation.

 

[Honey123]

Actually, the danger was to Corey because, although all three of them were now on the same side, at least as far as the land mollusk question was concerned, none of them knew this, being almost as confused as the people posting to this thread.

But someone, somewhere had to take charge, there was too much at risk, too much at stake but, who, who could that person be.........??

Clooney, suddenly realizing he was a super-hero, leaped to his feet to take charge, peeling off his pants to reveal his super-hero costume, less impressive than it might have been because of the snail cum on the seat of his pants. Using his super-hero, super-sized white, sparkling teeth, he grabbed Bindy's pussy hair between his teeth, swinging her round and round and tossing her into a nearby bush, knocking Corinne a/k/a Corey down and falling on top of his/her face, which made Bindy smile and start to gyrate.

While Bindy's face was in Corinne/Corey's lap, she felt an incredibly large bulge, to which she unzip the trousers and out popped the most beautiful cock she had ever seen. Although it was somewhat smaller than the snail's cock she had admired earlier, it was perfectly shaped and she happily took it into her mouth while grinding her pussy on the face of the very fortunate Corey DuBois.

Clooney yelled, "AAAAaaaaaaAAAAAAaaaaAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAA," (like Tarzan), then thumped his chest with his fists and jumped into the orgy. Leaping into action Clooney slipped between Bindy's thighs, parted her pubic hair and tied it behind her back, making access to her delicious mound much easier.

But then, he was sidetracked with plaiting the long pubic hair neatly; he was just that type of a guy - compulsively obsessive and orderly. Being the Metro-Sexual guy that we all know he is, he continually braided and unbraided Bindy's public hair until he got it right, and he got it right alright, but as he admired what he did, he realized it looked a bit like Willie Nelson, then thought, 'What the hell, bet the ol' geezer never had a perfect cock in his mouth' and with that he shoved it in, humming one of Willie's songs.

Behind Clooney, the croc's ghost rose, like a phoenix, from the dead body and with one look at the spectacle before it, started weeping copious tears - crocodile tears. Humming, On the Road Again, Clooney was unaware that the Croc's Ghost was lumming above him, until he felt droplets of tears upon his neck, turning around, Clooney paled at the sight before him and screamed, quite like a girl.

Except, not exactly - it was more like a transsexual person who had just had a sex change operation. This sound startled the croc, as well as Bindy and Corey, who were still engaged in a 69.




________
LOL --

 

[damppanties]

Actually, the danger was to Corey because, although all three of them were now on the same side, at least as far as the land mollusk question was concerned, none of them knew this, being almost as confused as the people posting to this thread.

But someone, somewhere had to take charge, there was too much at risk, too much at stake but, who, who could that person be.........??

Clooney, suddenly realizing he was a super-hero, leaped to his feet to take charge, peeling off his pants to reveal his super-hero costume, less impressive than it might have been because of the snail cum on the seat of his pants. Using his super-hero, super-sized white, sparkling teeth, he grabbed Bindy's pussy hair between his teeth, swinging her round and round and tossing her into a nearby bush, knocking Corinne a/k/a Corey down and falling on top of his/her face, which made Bindy smile and start to gyrate.

While Bindy's face was in Corinne/Corey's lap, she felt an incredibly large bulge, to which she unzip the trousers and out popped the most beautiful cock she had ever seen. Although it was somewhat smaller than the snail's cock she had admired earlier, it was perfectly shaped and she happily took it into her mouth while grinding her pussy on the face of the very fortunate Corey DuBois.

Clooney yelled, "AAAAaaaaaaAAAAAAaaaaAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAA," (like Tarzan), then thumped his chest with his fists and jumped into the orgy. Leaping into action Clooney slipped between Bindy's thighs, parted her pubic hair and tied it behind her back, making access to her delicious mound much easier.

But then, he was sidetracked with plaiting the long pubic hair neatly; he was just that type of a guy - compulsively obsessive and orderly. Being the Metro-Sexual guy that we all know he is, he continually braided and unbraided Bindy's public hair until he got it right, and he got it right alright, but as he admired what he did, he realized it looked a bit like Willie Nelson, then thought, 'What the hell, bet the ol' geezer never had a perfect cock in his mouth' and with that he shoved it in, humming one of Willie's songs.

Behind Clooney, the croc's ghost rose, like a phoenix, from the dead body and with one look at the spectacle before it, started weeping copious tears - crocodile tears. Humming, On the Road Again, Clooney was unaware that the Croc's Ghost was lumming above him, until he felt droplets of tears upon his neck, turning around, Clooney paled at the sight before him and screamed, quite like a girl. Except, not exactly - it was more like a transsexual person who had just had a sex change operation. This sound startled the croc, as well as Bindy and Corey, who were still engaged in a 69. They broke off the 69 into 34 and 35 and stared open-mouthed at Clooney.




________
LOL -- [/B][/QUOTE]

 

[Boxlicker101]

The persistent swish of the windshield wipers was putting Jasmine to sleep as traffic crept along at a snail’s pace. As a snail, Jasmine had never enjoyed traffic very much until today. But last night she had experienced her first multiple and even grid-lock could not get her down. Several days later, Jasmine galloped the final thirty-five inches into the supermarket parking lot and read her employer's shopping list: "Butter, fresh garlic, French bread, escargot..." Her eyes grew wide and she was just opening her mouth to rail about her employer's requests when a large shadow developed overhead and in an instant her life was snubbed out by Prada. Just before she died, she asked "Who is Prada?"

The woman exiting the grocery store swore loudly upon the crunching beneath her shoes and proceeded to smear poor Jasmine's remains along the asphalt to clean her gorgeous and expensive footwear. Jasmine's loss, however, was the ants' gain.

Less than a year ago, the Prada pumps - which were lipstick-red, with a practical yet sexy two-inch "kitten" heel - had been the smooth but intriguingly textured underbelly of a young Australian crocodile we'll call Bruce.

Bruce was slithering along one day, minding his own business when suddenly a beautiful and large breasted blonde leapt from the cattails, landing right on his back and encircling his chest with her arms. Bruce, slightly annoyed by the commotion, stopped dead in his tracks and turned his head to glare at the intruder of his peaceful morning trot.

The hostile blonde wrestled him ashore where, of all things, she began tickling him. Because this, laidies and gentlemen, was not your ordinary run-of-the-mill bimbo, but the fabulous Brenda Busty. Brenda happened to be the now-grown daughter of television's famed Crocodile Hunter, so naturally she was "croc savvy." Formerly known as Bindy, Brenda really knew how to turn on a wily croc.

"Croiky," cried Bruce, "This is dangerously close to a beastiality story."

Brenda laughed and shook her long, luxurious hair as she drew forth a long knife,"You should be so lucky, mate."

Impaling Bruce just below the jaw, Bindy smiled, if only her father knew she hated live crocs with a passion, thinking of how many pairs of shoes a croc this size would produce.

Also keeping in mind that she would have to remove Bruce’s spectacularly engorged bollocks, they were a highly prized and sought after aphrodisiac used to ward off impotency and genital warts, sacred to the people of the Hahaha tribe who were currently claiming squatters rights in the oval office of the Whitehouse.

Where, even as Brenda busily bobbited Bruce, the chief of staff was conferring with an aborigine expert on how they might regain control without creating an international incident.

The chief of staff had the IQ of your average dishwasher.

Meanwhile, back at the supermarket parking lot where the young snail Jasmine had met her demise, the owner of the Prada pumps was in consultation with her attorney and the Snails, Slugs & Slime Trail Antidefamation Society were on the phone with the chief of staff's secretary, Corinne Dubois.

"Listen, Ms. Dubois, I don't give a croc's ass that the chief of staff is busy, put him on the damn phone now." Bending over, the owner of Prada took off her gorgeous pump and scrapped Jasmine's remaining skin and blood onto the edge of the curb.

"Dammit, someone get me a tissue!!" She exclaimed.

The silver remains making a streak across the ground, glittering in the sunlight.

At the White House, Corinne put her hand over the phone and whispered to her boss, "Janet Jackson is on the line for you, sir."

"Hmmm. Tell her I'm busy. Can't you see I'm working, Corinne!" He replied, going back to his crossword puzzle. "Janet Jackson!! What a boob!!"

Corinne glared at her boss. What an absolute idiot, she thought. Glancing down at her Prada shoes, she thought about kicking him. She didn't, though, because she was too concerned about damaging her shoes, which she had affectionately named "Bruce".

She took her hand away from the receiver, "Janet?"

From the other end she hears, "Call me Ms. Jackson if you're nasty!"

"Ah, Okay...." Corinne replied. "Ms. Jackson, Jonathan is quite busy right now..."

"DAMMIT!!!" Ms. Jackson cut her off in midd-sentence. "There is nothing," she shouted into the phone, "As important as stopping the slaughter of innocent snails and slugs by women in expensive shoes!"

She felt a tapping on her shoulder and turned around.

"Excuse me, Miss, but what's that on your shoe?" A man asked her, pointing to the remains of Jasmine.

Meanwhile, back at the supermarket parking lot where the young snail Jasmine had met her demise, the owner of the Prada pumps was in consultation with her attorney and the Snails, Slugs & Slime Trail Antidefamation Society were on the phone with the chief of staff's secretary, Corinne Dubois.

"Listen, Ms. Dubois, I don't give a croc's ass that the chief of staff is busy, put him on the damn phone now." Bending over, the owner of Prada took off her gorgeous pump and scrapped Jasmine's remaining skin and blood onto the edge of the curb.

"Dammit, someone get me a tissue!!" She exclaimed.

The silver remains making a streak across the ground, glittering in the sunlight.

At the White House, Corinne put her hand over the phone and whispered to her boss, "Janet Jackson is on the line for you, sir."

"Hmmm. Tell her I'm busy. Can't you see I'm working, Corinne!" He replied, going back to his crossword puzzle. "Janet Jackson!! What a boob!!"

Corinne glared at her boss. What an absolute idiot, she thought. Glancing down at her Prada shoes, she thought about kicking him. She didn't, though, because she was too concerned about damaging her shoes, which she had affectionately named "Bruce".

She took her hand away from the receiver, "Janet?"

From the other end she hears, "Call me Ms. Jackson if you're nasty!"

"Ah, Okay...." Corinne replied. "Ms. Jackson, Jonathan is quite busy right now..."

"DAMMIT!!!" Ms. Jackson cut her off in midd-sentence. "There is nothing," she shouted into the phone, "As important as stopping the slaughter of innocent snails and slugs by women in expensive shoes!"

She felt a tapping on her shoulder and turned around.

"Excuse me, Miss, but what's that on your shoe?" A man asked her, pointing to the remains of Jasmine.

After exposing one of her boobs to the man and anybody else who might be watching, she replied, "Escargot".

"Bless you!" He replied, quickly revealing to her that he was in fact Agent Two-Penises, sent on a secret mission to infiltrate the almost secret C.U.M society ( Citizenship for Urban Molluscs).

Realizing that she was in the presence of a secret agent of the enemy snail haters league, Janet thought quickly and, after covering her boob, she smiled sweetly.

Hiding the gem incrusted nipple jewellery shaped out of a snail shell looking remarkably similar to Jasmines, she responded, "It's semen from when I kicked Bill Clinton in his crotch when he tried to stick a cigar in my pussy.

Meanwhile, in a secret compound deep beneath the polar ice cap, a woman read pornography on the internet and plotted wicked deeds. Her first order of business was to swap her blind husband's toothpaste out with hair removal cream. The cream, besides its primary function, could also be used to remove the remains of snails or slugs from shoes, and this was considered to be important in the plot to exterminate these creatures.

This, however, was of no concern to him as he gagged and choked at the awful taste of what he assumed was napalm in a tube.

In fact, "Napalm In A Tube" had been one of the few, failed new product introductions by Proctor & Gamble, for whom Corinne Dubois had worked as an assistant to the director of research and development...before "the incident" had taken her to the White House, where she fielded phone calls from breast-exposing, entertainment-industry publicity whores.

The man screamed as he spat the rancid paste into the sink, "Stella, you bitch! What wickedness possesses you to punish me so?" Then he realized that, although he had just performed oral sex on Stella, leaving some of her hair stuck in his teeth, the hair had miraculously disappeared.

As her husband fell to the floor, she heard his screams of dispair, "Stel--la! Stel--la!" She ignored him, though, and continued assembling the incindiary bombs that were to be used against orphanages. She had her orders and needed to work fast so she could get the bombs to someone she only knew as "Bindy". Although nobody knew it at the time, "Bindy" was mean and nasty because of a lack of pornography or smut.

Being brought up in a sex deprived family the only way Bindy was able to feel desire was to hump the crocs she wrestled, the more they moved the more it turned her on.

Bruce was her favorite with his hard skin and bumpy scales, she could reach an orgasm in record time. It wasn't much fun for the crocs, though, because after climaxing, Bindy killed them to make shoes from their hides.

Once Stella was done packaging the bombs, her instructions were to get on the phone with C.U.M. Stella objected to this idea, however, saying, "There's no room for me and them on the phone because it is so small that even I can just barely fit on there."

Stella, you see my dear friends, is the epitome of a dumb blonde. She is so dumb, in fact, that when C. U. M. said to use powder in the bombs, she thought they meant her face powder so that is what she made them of. Fortunately for the snails, the face power worked against the hair removal cream, making them grow in size.

When the bombs went off in the orphanages, they did no damage at all and spread the face powder, increasing the size of all the nearby snails and slugs.

"The C.U.M., where is the C.U.M.!!!", cried the critters. Because C.U.M. was strongly pro-snail, the molllusks wanted to form an alliance to destroy their enemies.

Agent Two-Penises heard their cries of need and immediately rose to the occasion. The agent, named because his penis was as big as two normal sized ones, had just recovered from hearing about an injury to his hero, Bill Clinton.

Meanwhile, on a private jet en route to Milan, George Clooney removed his shirt, stretched and yawned, pondering the meaning of existence as he began to unzip his pants. His thoughts quickly turned to simpler and yet more elemental ponderings as the zipper reached the end of its track. Eyeing his SuperHero costume which was hidden under his slacks, his mind began to develope a plan to not only save the land Mollusks but to put Bindy in her righfull place, in his lap.

"First, I have to stop Stella from blowing up any more orphanages," he decided.

But then he was distracted by a gorgeous blonde stewardess and his thoughts immediately went to her blowing him and the Mile High Club. When he suggested this, however, she said, "George, how could you, I am your mother," and, sure enough, it was the great singer, Rosemary Clooney after extensive plastic surgery. Since she has been dead for quite some time, those nasty snails did a job on her!

Although it is not commonly known, snails are voodoo experts and they had transformed the late ms. Clooney into a zombie, intending to use her to further their aims in Hollywood.

While George and Rosemary took a trip to the bathroom, it seemed that a very large, dark cloud was looming over the jet, making it quite difficult for the pilot to see.

As it got closer, the pilot realized it was not a cloud; it was a huge net, held aloft by giant flying snails, transformed by the face-powder bomb. The plane shook and bucked, quite like Rosemary in the bathroom. George was sitting on the toilet seat; his mother was on his lap, facing him, and his cock was imbedded deeply in her pussy. "Oh, George!" Rosemary cried, "Fuck me, fuck me like a wombat with a 7 inch dildo! I have been dead for a long time and I have really missed your big, hard cock in my cunt!"

While the plane bucked, George stuck his hard, thick cock in Rosemary's dusty and somewhat shrivelled pussy. In and out, he drove it, while fingering his mother's ass.

"Mommy, Oh Mommy," George moaned, "You're ass is so tight! Your cunt is loose but your ass is so tight, I want to fuck you there."

But unfortunately, before he could do that, the door swung open and there stood before them a 20 foot snail, with a 10 foot cock! "I am going to fuck your mother in her ass first," the snail announced. George replied, "Oh, no buddy, you're gonna fuck me first in the ass, then my Mommy!"

"I'm not a mummy, you idiot; I'm a zombie," his mother, rather hearing-impared, said to George.

Meanwhile back at the whitehouse, Agent Two-Penises was alerted to hostile take-over of Super Hero Clooney's plane and immediately stopped jerking-off to find the C.U.M. They weren't hard to find because they were accompanied by twenty foot snails with ten foot penises.

Linking into the Super Hero Radar Center of Super Hero Clooney, Agent Two- Penises, located an odd object flying near the Kennedy Space Center, knowing immediately this was Super Hero Clooney and the 20 foot Snails buy the dick shaped cloud that formed on the screen.


Agent Two-Penises immediately called Corinne Dubois, his assistant and showed her the radar screen to which she replied, "Let 'em eat cake!" and at that moment, Agent Two-Penises knew, not cake, but pussy!!!

"This is really good," he said, licking Corinne's fresh pussy juices off his lips, then diving back to enclose her clit in his mouth.

But little did Agent Two-Penises know that Corinne had smoothed the "cream" all over her clit, and as his licks became slower, she pushed his head in deeper to her pussy and as she reached her orgasm she yelled, "Viva La C.U.M.!!!" Unknown to the government, Corinne had been a secrent agent of C.U.M. all along but now she had to cum out in the open.

As Corinne kicked Two-Penises aside with her red Prada shoes, she picked up the telephone and made a direct call to Bindy. "Bindy, I have just ruined my shoes kicking a bad guy so you are going to have to kill some more crocodiles to make more."

To which Bindy replied, "Corinne, it will be my pleasure, mate, I haven't had a good orgasm since my Bruce bucked and shook under me."

Corinne was aware that Bindy was a member of the dastardly Snail Haters League, but she really need shoes and, as she said, "First things first." The one thing Corinne believed in was, whether in sex or in life, she always CAME first, and if she had to play both sides of the fence, dammit, she'd do it! This was especially so when it came to her shoe wardrobe.

"Corinne," Bindy continued. "Ever do a woman? I have only ever done crocs, male or female, and I have always wondered about eating a hot pussy like yours, or having mine eaten."

Corinne paused for a moment, not quite sure if at this time she should tell Bindy that she was a cross-dresser, a male who loved wearing woman's clothes, especialy red Prada shoes. Being a heterosexual who liked wearing women's clothing, Corinne thought happily about eating Bindy's pussy but she wondered about what Bindy would do when she realized she had been tricked, especially considering how handy Bindy was with her knife.

"Bindy,' Corey said, "it would be my pleasure to eat you, as I always wondered what an Aussy Pussy would taste like."

"Well, why don't you come on down under to go down under on me and you will find out." With that Bindy hung up the phone and feeling a bit excited and horny, went outside to look for the biggest, scaliest croc in the pond and when she found him, she road him, rubbing her Aussy pussy against him until she came, screaming, "Yes! Yes.......I'm cummmmmmmmmmmmminnnnnnnnnnng!"

Meanwhile, Super Hero Clooney and the twenty foot snails were still roaming the sky, Clooney being fucked up the ass, as he ate out the woman in front of him who he thought was his mother, but was actually his AUNT Rosemary, she raised him as her own and had never told him his mother gave him up at birth. As Clooney was being fucked in the ass by the twenty foot snail and eating out his Mother/Aunt Rosemary, this firey threesome had no idea that the plane was descending toward the ground in a frightfully fast way!!! The added weight of the giant snails, combined with the violent motion in one of the bathrooms and adjacent aisle, had caused the pilot to almost lose control, but he was skillfully managing to land it near a large pond in Australia.

When the plane landed, Clooney staggered out and seeing a woman, was immediately enraptured by Bindy, who, after the delightful orgasm she'd just had, was lying with her legs open and her eyes closed. Stroking her well worn-out croc and smiling.

Of course the cock.. err.. croc being stroked was dead, for Bindy had killed him in the height of her orgasm, as was her habit. Clooney ignored the dead croc because he only had eyes for Bindy's hot, dripping pussy and he was seized with a strong urge to get on his knees between her legs and bury his face in it.

But before he could, Bindy opened her eyes and said, "Hey, mate, iis that a snail in your pocket or are you happy to see me?"

"I'm happy to see you but never mind that just now because I want to spend the next several hours eating your marvelous pussy."

Just then, Bindy's eyes were drawn to the 20 foot snail behind Clooney, and she fainted. Having led a rather isolated life, she had never seen a real cock before so the ten foot long one imbedded in Clooney's ass was something of a shock. Actually, shock is such a small word to describe what actually happened to Bindy, and coming right after her orgasm too.

Clooney was such an egotist that he thought that Bindy had fainted at the sight of his glorious handsomeness. His Glorious Handsomeness trotted over to Bindy and buried his face in her luxurious, flowing hair. Bindy had never trimmed her pubic hair which was why it was long and flowing. He fumbled around for some time and then finally reached the ultimate prize. Clooney drew her luscious clit into his mouth and started sucking on the sweet love toy, while his tongue caressed the engorged top and sides. Clooney licked and sucked at Bindy's clit, once in a while spitting out some long hair that would stick in his teeth. The hair irritated his eyes and his face too, so Clooney finally gave up on clit-sucking. He then decided that he would take his Pride & Joy and shove it up Bindy's pussy and not so gently, which woke her up instantly and she rode him like a croc and we all know what happens to cocks...err crocs when Bindy rides 'em. Fortunately for Clooney, the super hero suit that he was wearing beneath his clothing deflected her knife.

Once Bindy woke up from her dazed orgasmic fainting spell, she realized whatshe was doing and saw Glorious Handsomeness before her, bleeding and whimpering in pain, "Ouchy! Ouchy!" whimpered Clooney, "that smarts!"

Being on opposite sides of the land mollusk question, Bindy and Clooney were mortal enemies but, because of the secretiveness of both organizations and the confusion and weirdness of this thread, neither one knew it and Bindy, after seeing the big cock on the snail and how he was fucking clooney in the ass with it and thinking about how much she had enjoyed having her pussy eaten by Clooney, changed sides then and there.

Bindy and Clooney were quite happy as they snuggled against each other, but danger in the form of Corinne a/k/a Corey lurked in the bush, well, not her bush, although it is so long and hairy Lord knows what could be hiding in there!!!

Actually, the danger was to Corey because, although all three of them were now on the same side, at least as far as the land mollusk question was concerned, none of them knew this, being almost as confused as the people posting to this thread.

But someone, somewhere had to take charge, there was too much at risk, too much at stake but, who, who could that person be.........??

Clooney, suddenly realizing he was a super-hero, leaped to his feet to take charge, peeling off his pants to reveal his super-hero costume, less impressive than it might have been because of the snail cum on the seat of his pants. Using his super-hero, super-sized white, sparkling teeth, he grabbed Bindy's pussy hair between his teeth, swinging her round and round and tossing her into a nearby bush, knocking Corinne a/k/a Corey down and falling on top of his/her face, which made Bindy smile and start to gyrate.

While Bindy's face was in Corinne/Corey's lap, she felt an incredibly large bulge, to which she unzip the trousers and out popped the most beautiful cock she had every seen. Although it was somewhat smaller than the snail cock she had admired earlier, it was perfectly shaped and she happily took it into her mouth while grinding her pussy on the face of the very fortunate Corey DuBois.

Clooney yelled, "AAAAaaaaaaAAAAAAaaaaAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAA," (like Tarzan), then thumped his chest with his fists and jumped into the orgy. Leaping into action Clooney slipped between Bindy's thighs, parted her pubic hair and tied it behind her back, making access to her delicious mound much easier.

But then, he was sidetracked with plaiting the long pubic hair neatly; he was just that type of a guy - compulsively obsessive and orderly. Being the Metro-Sexual guy that we all know he is, he continually braided and unbraided Bindy's public hair until he got it right, and he got it right alright, but as he admired what he did, he realized it looked a bit like Willie Nelson, then thought, 'What the hell, bet the ol' geezer never had a perfect cock in his mouth' and with that he shoved it in, humming one of Willie's songs.

Behind Clooney, the croc's ghost rose, like a phoenix, from the dead body and with one look at the spectacle before it, started weeping copious tears - crocodile tears. Humming, On the Road Again, Clooney was unaware that the Croc's Ghost was lumming above him, until he felt droplets of tears upon his neck, turning around, Clooney paled at the sight before him and screamed, quite like a girl. Except, not exactly - it was more like a transsexual person who had just had a sex change operation. This sound startled the croc, as well as Bindy and Corey, who were still engaged in a 69. They broke off the 69 into 34 and 35 and stared open-mouthed at Clooney.

The crocodile ghost interrupted his crying long enough to tell the persons in front of him how much all the crocs loved Bindy but they were disappointed when she always killed them after they had sex with her.

 

[Honey123]

Actually, the danger was to Corey because, although all three of them were now on the same side, at least as far as the land mollusk question was concerned, none of them knew this, being almost as confused as the people posting to this thread.

But someone, somewhere had to take charge, there was too much at risk, too much at stake but, who, who could that person be.........??

Clooney, suddenly realizing he was a super-hero, leaped to his feet to take charge, peeling off his pants to reveal his super-hero costume, less impressive than it might have been because of the snail cum on the seat of his pants. Using his super-hero, super-sized white, sparkling teeth, he grabbed Bindy's pussy hair between his teeth, swinging her round and round and tossing her into a nearby bush, knocking Corinne a/k/a Corey down and falling on top of his/her face, which made Bindy smile and start to gyrate.

While Bindy's face was in Corinne/Corey's lap, she felt an incredibly large bulge, to which she unzip the trousers and out popped the most beautiful cock she had ever seen. Although it was somewhat smaller than the snail's cock she had admired earlier, it was perfectly shaped and she happily took it into her mouth while grinding her pussy on the face of the very fortunate Corey DuBois.

Clooney yelled, "AAAAaaaaaaAAAAAAaaaaAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAA," (like Tarzan), then thumped his chest with his fists and jumped into the orgy. Leaping into action Clooney slipped between Bindy's thighs, parted her pubic hair and tied it behind her back, making access to her delicious mound much easier.

But then, he was sidetracked with plaiting the long pubic hair neatly; he was just that type of a guy - compulsively obsessive and orderly. Being the Metro-Sexual guy that we all know he is, he continually braided and unbraided Bindy's public hair until he got it right, and he got it right alright, but as he admired what he did, he realized it looked a bit like Willie Nelson, then thought, 'What the hell, bet the ol' geezer never had a perfect cock in his mouth' and with that he shoved it in, humming one of Willie's songs.

Behind Clooney, the croc's ghost rose, like a phoenix, from the dead body and with one look at the spectacle before it, started weeping copious tears - crocodile tears. Humming, On the Road Again, Clooney was unaware that the Croc's Ghost was lumming above him, until he felt droplets of tears upon his neck, turning around, Clooney paled at the sight before him and screamed, quite like a girl. Except, not exactly - it was more like a transsexual person who had just had a sex change operation. This sound startled the croc, as well as Bindy and Corey, who were still engaged in a 69. They broke off the 69 into 34 and 35 and stared open-mouthed at Clooney.

The crocodile gholst interrupted his crying long enough to tell the persons in front of him how much all the crocs loved Bindy but they were disappointed when she always killed them after sex with her.

So the Croc walked past Clooney and made his way to Bindy, who like the woman she is, stood up in all her naked, beautifulness, her braided pubic hair unfortunately tripping her.

 

[Boxlicker101]

Clooney yelled, "AAAAaaaaaaAAAAAAaaaaAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAA," (like Tarzan), then thumped his chest with his fists and jumped into the orgy. Leaping into action Clooney slipped between Bindy's thighs, parted her pubic hair and tied it behind her back, making access to her delicious mound much easier.

But then, he was sidetracked with plaiting the long pubic hair neatly; he was just that type of a guy - compulsively obsessive and orderly. Being the Metro-Sexual guy that we all know he is, he continually braided and unbraided Bindy's public hair until he got it right, and he got it right alright, but as he admired what he did, he realized it looked a bit like Willie Nelson, then thought, 'What the hell, bet the ol' geezer never had a perfect cock in his mouth' and with that he shoved it in, humming one of Willie's songs.

Behind Clooney, the croc's ghost rose, like a phoenix, from the dead body and with one look at the spectacle before it, started weeping copious tears - crocodile tears. Humming, On the Road Again, Clooney was unaware that the Croc's Ghost was lumming above him, until he felt droplets of tears upon his neck, turning around, Clooney paled at the sight before him and screamed, quite like a girl. Except, not exactly - it was more like a transsexual person who had just had a sex change operation. This sound startled the croc, as well as Bindy and Corey, who were still engaged in a 69. They broke off the 69 into 34 and 35 and stared open-mouthed at Clooney.

The crocodile ghost interrupted his crying long enough to tell the persons in front of him how much all the crocs loved Bindy but they were disappointed when she always killed them after sex with her.

So the Croc walked past Clooney and made his way to Bindy, who like the woman she is, stood up in all her naked, beautifulness, her braided pubic hair unfortunately tripping her. Like the gentleman he was, the ghost offered his claw to Bindy and helped her to her feet but, being a ghost and insubstantial, he could not join the orgy but he did want to watch and he told the humans to continue.

 

[Honey123]

The persistent swish of the windshield wipers was putting Jasmine to sleep as traffic crept along at a snail’s pace. As a snail, Jasmine had never enjoyed traffic very much until today. But last night she had experienced her first multiple and even grid-lock could not get her down. Several days later, Jasmine galloped the final thirty-five inches into the supermarket parking lot and read her employer's shopping list: "Butter, fresh garlic, French bread, escargot..." Her eyes grew wide and she was just opening her mouth to rail about her employer's requests when a large shadow developed overhead and in an instant her life was snubbed out by Prada. Just before she died, she asked "Who is Prada?"

The woman exiting the grocery store swore loudly upon the crunching beneath her shoes and proceeded to smear poor Jasmine's remains along the asphalt to clean her gorgeous and expensive footwear. Jasmine's loss, however, was the ants' gain.

Less than a year ago, the Prada pumps - which were lipstick-red, with a practical yet sexy two-inch "kitten" heel - had been the smooth but intriguingly textured underbelly of a young Australian crocodile we'll call Bruce.

Bruce was slithering along one day, minding his own business when suddenly a beautiful and large breasted blonde leapt from the cattails, landing right on his back and encircling his chest with her arms. Bruce, slightly annoyed by the commotion, stopped dead in his tracks and turned his head to glare at the intruder of his peaceful morning trot.

The hostile blonde wrestled him ashore where, of all things, she began tickling him. Because this, laidies and gentlemen, was not your ordinary run-of-the-mill bimbo, but the fabulous Brenda Busty. Brenda happened to be the now-grown daughter of television's famed Crocodile Hunter, so naturally she was "croc savvy." Formerly known as Bindy, Brenda really knew how to turn on a wily croc.

"Croiky," cried Bruce, "This is dangerously close to a beastiality story."

Brenda laughed and shook her long, luxurious hair as she drew forth a long knife,"You should be so lucky, mate."

Impaling Bruce just below the jaw, Bindy smiled, if only her father knew she hated live crocs with a passion, thinking of how many pairs of shoes a croc this size would produce.

Also keeping in mind that she would have to remove Bruce’s spectacularly engorged bollocks, they were a highly prized and sought after aphrodisiac used to ward off impotency and genital warts, sacred to the people of the Hahaha tribe who were currently claiming squatters rights in the oval office of the Whitehouse.

Where, even as Brenda busily bobbited Bruce, the chief of staff was conferring with an aborigine expert on how they might regain control without creating an international incident.

The chief of staff had the IQ of your average dishwasher.

Meanwhile, back at the supermarket parking lot where the young snail Jasmine had met her demise, the owner of the Prada pumps was in consultation with her attorney and the Snails, Slugs & Slime Trail Antidefamation Society were on the phone with the chief of staff's secretary, Corinne Dubois.

"Listen, Ms. Dubois, I don't give a croc's ass that the chief of staff is busy, put him on the damn phone now." Bending over, the owner of Prada took off her gorgeous pump and scrapped Jasmine's remaining skin and blood onto the edge of the curb.

"Dammit, someone get me a tissue!!" She exclaimed.

The silver remains making a streak across the ground, glittering in the sunlight.

At the White House, Corinne put her hand over the phone and whispered to her boss, "Janet Jackson is on the line for you, sir."

"Hmmm. Tell her I'm busy. Can't you see I'm working, Corinne!" He replied, going back to his crossword puzzle. "Janet Jackson!! What a boob!!"

Corinne glared at her boss. What an absolute idiot, she thought. Glancing down at her Prada shoes, she thought about kicking him. She didn't, though, because she was too concerned about damaging her shoes, which she had affectionately named "Bruce".

She took her hand away from the receiver, "Janet?"

From the other end she hears, "Call me Ms. Jackson if you're nasty!"

"Ah, Okay...." Corinne replied. "Ms. Jackson, Jonathan is quite busy right now..."

"DAMMIT!!!" Ms. Jackson cut her off in midd-sentence. "There is nothing," she shouted into the phone, "As important as stopping the slaughter of innocent snails and slugs by women in expensive shoes!"

She felt a tapping on her shoulder and turned around.

"Excuse me, Miss, but what's that on your shoe?" A man asked her, pointing to the remains of Jasmine.

Meanwhile, back at the supermarket parking lot where the young snail Jasmine had met her demise, the owner of the Prada pumps was in consultation with her attorney and the Snails, Slugs & Slime Trail Antidefamation Society were on the phone with the chief of staff's secretary, Corinne Dubois.

"Listen, Ms. Dubois, I don't give a croc's ass that the chief of staff is busy, put him on the damn phone now." Bending over, the owner of Prada took off her gorgeous pump and scrapped Jasmine's remaining skin and blood onto the edge of the curb.

"Dammit, someone get me a tissue!!" She exclaimed.

The silver remains making a streak across the ground, glittering in the sunlight.

At the White House, Corinne put her hand over the phone and whispered to her boss, "Janet Jackson is on the line for you, sir."

"Hmmm. Tell her I'm busy. Can't you see I'm working, Corinne!" He replied, going back to his crossword puzzle. "Janet Jackson!! What a boob!!"

Corinne glared at her boss. What an absolute idiot, she thought. Glancing down at her Prada shoes, she thought about kicking him. She didn't, though, because she was too concerned about damaging her shoes, which she had affectionately named "Bruce".

She took her hand away from the receiver, "Janet?"

From the other end she hears, "Call me Ms. Jackson if you're nasty!"

"Ah, Okay...." Corinne replied. "Ms. Jackson, Jonathan is quite busy right now..."

"DAMMIT!!!" Ms. Jackson cut her off in midd-sentence. "There is nothing," she shouted into the phone, "As important as stopping the slaughter of innocent snails and slugs by women in expensive shoes!"

She felt a tapping on her shoulder and turned around.

"Excuse me, Miss, but what's that on your shoe?" A man asked her, pointing to the remains of Jasmine.

After exposing one of her boobs to the man and anybody else who might be watching, she replied, "Escargot".

"Bless you!" He replied, quickly revealing to her that he was in fact Agent Two-Penises, sent on a secret mission to infiltrate the almost secret C.U.M society ( Citizenship for Urban Molluscs).

Realizing that she was in the presence of a secret agent of the enemy snail haters league, Janet thought quickly and, after covering her boob, she smiled sweetly.

Hiding the gem incrusted nipple jewellery shaped out of a snail shell looking remarkably similar to Jasmines, she responded, "It's semen from when I kicked Bill Clinton in his crotch when he tried to stick a cigar in my pussy.

Meanwhile, in a secret compound deep beneath the polar ice cap, a woman read pornography on the internet and plotted wicked deeds. Her first order of business was to swap her blind husband's toothpaste out with hair removal cream. The cream, besides its primary function, could also be used to remove the remains of snails or slugs from shoes, and this was considered to be important in the plot to exterminate these creatures.

This, however, was of no concern to him as he gagged and choked at the awful taste of what he assumed was napalm in a tube.

In fact, "Napalm In A Tube" had been one of the few, failed new product introductions by Proctor & Gamble, for whom Corinne Dubois had worked as an assistant to the director of research and development...before "the incident" had taken her to the White House, where she fielded phone calls from breast-exposing, entertainment-industry publicity whores.

The man screamed as he spat the rancid paste into the sink, "Stella, you bitch! What wickedness possesses you to punish me so?" Then he realized that, although he had just performed oral sex on Stella, leaving some of her hair stuck in his teeth, the hair had miraculously disappeared.

As her husband fell to the floor, she heard his screams of dispair, "Stel--la! Stel--la!" She ignored him, though, and continued assembling the incindiary bombs that were to be used against orphanages. She had her orders and needed to work fast so she could get the bombs to someone she only knew as "Bindy". Although nobody knew it at the time, "Bindy" was mean and nasty because of a lack of pornography or smut.

Being brought up in a sex deprived family the only way Bindy was able to feel desire was to hump the crocs she wrestled, the more they moved the more it turned her on.

Bruce was her favorite with his hard skin and bumpy scales, she could reach an orgasm in record time. It wasn't much fun for the crocs, though, because after climaxing, Bindy killed them to make shoes from their hides.

Once Stella was done packaging the bombs, her instructions were to get on the phone with C.U.M. Stella objected to this idea, however, saying, "There's no room for me and them on the phone because it is so small that even I can just barely fit on there."

Stella, you see my dear friends, is the epitome of a dumb blonde. She is so dumb, in fact, that when C. U. M. said to use powder in the bombs, she thought they meant her face powder so that is what she made them of. Fortunately for the snails, the face power worked against the hair removal cream, making them grow in size.

When the bombs went off in the orphanages, they did no damage at all and spread the face powder, increasing the size of all the nearby snails and slugs.

"The C.U.M., where is the C.U.M.!!!", cried the critters. Because C.U.M. was strongly pro-snail, the molllusks wanted to form an alliance to destroy their enemies.

Agent Two-Penises heard their cries of need and immediately rose to the occasion. The agent, named because his penis was as big as two normal sized ones, had just recovered from hearing about an injury to his hero, Bill Clinton.

Meanwhile, on a private jet en route to Milan, George Clooney removed his shirt, stretched and yawned, pondering the meaning of existence as he began to unzip his pants. His thoughts quickly turned to simpler and yet more elemental ponderings as the zipper reached the end of its track. Eyeing his SuperHero costume which was hidden under his slacks, his mind began to develope a plan to not only save the land Mollusks but to put Bindy in her righfull place, in his lap.

"First, I have to stop Stella from blowing up any more orphanages," he decided.

But then he was distracted by a gorgeous blonde stewardess and his thoughts immediately went to her blowing him and the Mile High Club. When he suggested this, however, she said, "George, how could you, I am your mother," and, sure enough, it was the great singer, Rosemary Clooney after extensive plastic surgery. Since she has been dead for quite some time, those nasty snails did a job on her!

Although it is not commonly known, snails are voodoo experts and they had transformed the late ms. Clooney into a zombie, intending to use her to further their aims in Hollywood.

While George and Rosemary took a trip to the bathroom, it seemed that a very large, dark cloud was looming over the jet, making it quite difficult for the pilot to see.

As it got closer, the pilot realized it was not a cloud; it was a huge net, held aloft by giant flying snails, transformed by the face-powder bomb. The plane shook and bucked, quite like Rosemary in the bathroom. George was sitting on the toilet seat; his mother was on his lap, facing him, and his cock was imbedded deeply in her pussy. "Oh, George!" Rosemary cried, "Fuck me, fuck me like a wombat with a 7 inch dildo! I have been dead for a long time and I have really missed your big, hard cock in my cunt!"

While the plane bucked, George stuck his hard, thick cock in Rosemary's dusty and somewhat shrivelled pussy. In and out, he drove it, while fingering his mother's ass.

"Mommy, Oh Mommy," George moaned, "You're ass is so tight! Your cunt is loose but your ass is so tight, I want to fuck you there."

But unfortunately, before he could do that, the door swung open and there stood before them a 20 foot snail, with a 10 foot cock! "I am going to fuck your mother in her ass first," the snail announced. George replied, "Oh, no buddy, you're gonna fuck me first in the ass, then my Mommy!"

"I'm not a mummy, you idiot; I'm a zombie," his mother, rather hearing-impared, said to George.

Meanwhile back at the whitehouse, Agent Two-Penises was alerted to hostile take-over of Super Hero Clooney's plane and immediately stopped jerking-off to find the C.U.M. They weren't hard to find because they were accompanied by twenty foot snails with ten foot penises.

Linking into the Super Hero Radar Center of Super Hero Clooney, Agent Two- Penises, located an odd object flying near the Kennedy Space Center, knowing immediately this was Super Hero Clooney and the 20 foot Snails buy the dick shaped cloud that formed on the screen.


Agent Two-Penises immediately called Corinne Dubois, his assistant and showed her the radar screen to which she replied, "Let 'em eat cake!" and at that moment, Agent Two-Penises knew, not cake, but pussy!!!

"This is really good," he said, licking Corinne's fresh pussy juices off his lips, then diving back to enclose her clit in his mouth.

But little did Agent Two-Penises know that Corinne had smoothed the "cream" all over her clit, and as his licks became slower, she pushed his head in deeper to her pussy and as she reached her orgasm she yelled, "Viva La C.U.M.!!!" Unknown to the government, Corinne had been a secrent agent of C.U.M. all along but now she had to cum out in the open.

As Corinne kicked Two-Penises aside with her red Prada shoes, she picked up the telephone and made a direct call to Bindy. "Bindy, I have just ruined my shoes kicking a bad guy so you are going to have to kill some more crocodiles to make more."

To which Bindy replied, "Corinne, it will be my pleasure, mate, I haven't had a good orgasm since my Bruce bucked and shook under me."

Corinne was aware that Bindy was a member of the dastardly Snail Haters League, but she really need shoes and, as she said, "First things first." The one thing Corinne believed in was, whether in sex or in life, she always CAME first, and if she had to play both sides of the fence, dammit, she'd do it! This was especially so when it came to her shoe wardrobe.

"Corinne," Bindy continued. "Ever do a woman? I have only ever done crocs, male or female, and I have always wondered about eating a hot pussy like yours, or having mine eaten."

Corinne paused for a moment, not quite sure if at this time she should tell Bindy that she was a cross-dresser, a male who loved wearing woman's clothes, especialy red Prada shoes. Being a heterosexual who liked wearing women's clothing, Corinne thought happily about eating Bindy's pussy but she wondered about what Bindy would do when she realized she had been tricked, especially considering how handy Bindy was with her knife.

"Bindy,' Corey said, "it would be my pleasure to eat you, as I always wondered what an Aussy Pussy would taste like."

"Well, why don't you come on down under to go down under on me and you will find out." With that Bindy hung up the phone and feeling a bit excited and horny, went outside to look for the biggest, scaliest croc in the pond and when she found him, she road him, rubbing her Aussy pussy against him until she came, screaming, "Yes! Yes.......I'm cummmmmmmmmmmmminnnnnnnnnnng!"

Meanwhile, Super Hero Clooney and the twenty foot snails were still roaming the sky, Clooney being fucked up the ass, as he ate out the woman in front of him who he thought was his mother, but was actually his AUNT Rosemary, she raised him as her own and had never told him his mother gave him up at birth. As Clooney was being fucked in the ass by the twenty foot snail and eating out his Mother/Aunt Rosemary, this firey threesome had no idea that the plane was descending toward the ground in a frightfully fast way!!! The added weight of the giant snails, combined with the violent motion in one of the bathrooms and adjacent aisle, had caused the pilot to almost lose control, but he was skillfully managing to land it near a large pond in Australia.

When the plane landed, Clooney staggered out and seeing a woman, was immediately enraptured by Bindy, who, after the delightful orgasm she'd just had, was lying with her legs open and her eyes closed. Stroking her well worn-out croc and smiling.

Of course the cock.. err.. croc being stroked was dead, for Bindy had killed him in the height of her orgasm, as was her habit. Clooney ignored the dead croc because he only had eyes for Bindy's hot, dripping pussy and he was seized with a strong urge to get on his knees between her legs and bury his face in it.

But before he could, Bindy opened her eyes and said, "Hey, mate, iis that a snail in your pocket or are you happy to see me?"

"I'm happy to see you but never mind that just now because I want to spend the next several hours eating your marvelous pussy."

Just then, Bindy's eyes were drawn to the 20 foot snail behind Clooney, and she fainted. Having led a rather isolated life, she had never seen a real cock before so the ten foot long one imbedded in Clooney's ass was something of a shock. Actually, shock is such a small word to describe what actually happened to Bindy, and coming right after her orgasm too.

Clooney was such an egotist that he thought that Bindy had fainted at the sight of his glorious handsomeness. His Glorious Handsomeness trotted over to Bindy and buried his face in her luxurious, flowing hair. Bindy had never trimmed her pubic hair which was why it was long and flowing. He fumbled around for some time and then finally reached the ultimate prize. Clooney drew her luscious clit into his mouth and started sucking on the sweet love toy, while his tongue caressed the engorged top and sides. Clooney licked and sucked at Bindy's clit, once in a while spitting out some long hair that would stick in his teeth. The hair irritated his eyes and his face too, so Clooney finally gave up on clit-sucking. He then decided that he would take his Pride & Joy and shove it up Bindy's pussy and not so gently, which woke her up instantly and she rode him like a croc and we all know what happens to cocks...err crocs when Bindy rides 'em. Fortunately for Clooney, the super hero suit that he was wearing beneath his clothing deflected her knife.

Once Bindy woke up from her dazed orgasmic fainting spell, she realized whatshe was doing and saw Glorious Handsomeness before her, bleeding and whimpering in pain, "Ouchy! Ouchy!" whimpered Clooney, "that smarts!"

Being on opposite sides of the land mollusk question, Bindy and Clooney were mortal enemies but, because of the secretiveness of both organizations and the confusion and weirdness of this thread, neither one knew it and Bindy, after seeing the big cock on the snail and how he was fucking clooney in the ass with it and thinking about how much she had enjoyed having her pussy eaten by Clooney, changed sides then and there.

Bindy and Clooney were quite happy as they snuggled against each other, but danger in the form of Corinne a/k/a Corey lurked in the bush, well, not her bush, although it is so long and hairy Lord knows what could be hiding in there!!!

Actually, the danger was to Corey because, although all three of them were now on the same side, at least as far as the land mollusk question was concerned, none of them knew this, being almost as confused as the people posting to this thread.

But someone, somewhere had to take charge, there was too much at risk, too much at stake but, who, who could that person be.........??

Clooney, suddenly realizing he was a super-hero, leaped to his feet to take charge, peeling off his pants to reveal his super-hero costume, less impressive than it might have been because of the snail cum on the seat of his pants. Using his super-hero, super-sized white, sparkling teeth, he grabbed Bindy's pussy hair between his teeth, swinging her round and round and tossing her into a nearby bush, knocking Corinne a/k/a Corey down and falling on top of his/her face, which made Bindy smile and start to gyrate.

While Bindy's face was in Corinne/Corey's lap, she felt an incredibly large bulge, to which she unzip the trousers and out popped the most beautiful cock she had every seen. Although it was somewhat smaller than the snail cock she had admired earlier, it was perfectly shaped and she happily took it into her mouth while grinding her pussy on the face of the very fortunate Corey DuBois.

Clooney yelled, "AAAAaaaaaaAAAAAAaaaaAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAA," (like Tarzan), then thumped his chest with his fists and jumped into the orgy. Leaping into action Clooney slipped between Bindy's thighs, parted her pubic hair and tied it behind her back, making access to her delicious mound much easier.

But then, he was sidetracked with plaiting the long pubic hair neatly; he was just that type of a guy - compulsively obsessive and orderly. Being the Metro-Sexual guy that we all know he is, he continually braided and unbraided Bindy's public hair until he got it right, and he got it right alright, but as he admired what he did, he realized it looked a bit like Willie Nelson, then thought, 'What the hell, bet the ol' geezer never had a perfect cock in his mouth' and with that he shoved it in, humming one of Willie's songs.

Behind Clooney, the croc's ghost rose, like a phoenix, from the dead body and with one look at the spectacle before it, started weeping copious tears - crocodile tears. Humming, On the Road Again, Clooney was unaware that the Croc's Ghost was lumming above him, until he felt droplets of tears upon his neck, turning around, Clooney paled at the sight before him and screamed, quite like a girl. Except, not exactly - it was more like a transsexual person who had just had a sex change operation. This sound startled the croc, as well as Bindy and Corey, who were still engaged in a 69. They broke off the 69 into 34 and 35 and stared open-mouthed at Clooney.

The crocodile ghost interrupted his crying long enough to tell the persons in front of him how much all the crocs loved Bindy but they were disappointed when she always killed them after they had sex with her.

So the Croc walked past Clooney and made his way to Bindy, who like the woman she is, stood up in all her naked, beautifulness, her braided pubic hair unfortunately tripping her. Like the gentleman he was, the ghost offered his claw to Bindy and helped her to her feet but, being a ghost and insubstantial, he could not join the orgy but he did want to watch and he told the humans to continue. As he watched the orgy, the croc's eye caught sight of the 20 foot snail still embedded in Super Hero Clooney's ass.