Is It Possible?
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silver_inari
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Some of my real good friends from college are like brothers to me. Very very good friends. If they needed anything they could call and I'd drop everything and haul ass to get the them.
Have I ever entertained romantic thoughts about them, I have not. And I'm pretty sure that they haven;t thought them about me. In fact, the thought is kinda icky....
Have I ever entertained romantic thoughts about them, I have not. And I'm pretty sure that they haven;t thought them about me. In fact, the thought is kinda icky....
graceanne
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I think it's possible, but very very VERY rare. I think that men think about sex a lot, and just cause the woman isn't considering it, doesnt' mean that the guy wouldn't if given a chance. So I voted that it's possible, but I almost voted the other way, cause it's so unlikely.
E
esclave_PP
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It is possible. I've had many male friends and we haven't fallen into temptation so to speak 
I think it really depends on the 2 people in question
I think it really depends on the 2 people in question 
m wisdom
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I'm somewhat attracted to all off my female friends and that means that there is a temptation. I would however still turn down some off them where the longterm consequences wouldn't be worth it.
So a man and a woman can be be friends but at least for me there as always an attraction and temptation even if it's something that I have no desire to act on.
Not sure that made any sense.
So a man and a woman can be be friends but at least for me there as always an attraction and temptation even if it's something that I have no desire to act on.
Not sure that made any sense.
sunfox
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My best and closest friends are all men.. one of them I've known for over 25 years now. He's gorgeous.. kinda Brad Pitt-like.. but I've never been attracted beyond noticing rather belatedly that yes, he was good looking, when a female friend pointed it out. 
I tend to prefer male friends to female. I have trouble trusting the members of my own gender to have my best interests in mind.
I tend to prefer male friends to female. I have trouble trusting the members of my own gender to have my best interests in mind.
I think it's possible but like malcah said a lot of it depends on the people involved. Personally I used to have more guy friends then female ones, those numbers have changed a bit in recent years but all my female friends are the types of girls that usually get along better with guys then girl so there is always a bevy of men floating around when we all hang out.
bridgeburner
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I've got quite a few platonic male friends. Many of them are married or in committed relationships and I'm also friends with their wives.
Now, I don't on any regular basis hang out one on one with committed guys when their wives/girlfriends are not around, but it's certainly never occurred to me to tempt them or to be tempted by them in general. On an individual case I have known men who were off limits to my mind but didn't consider themselves so. I avoid them. That's not a hassle I want to deal with.
I've also got a lot of single, platonic male friends. A couple of them would probably take me up on an offer of more, but that's not really at the forefront of our friendships.
So, yes, I think it's quite possible but I do think you have to be careful and aware.
-B
Now, I don't on any regular basis hang out one on one with committed guys when their wives/girlfriends are not around, but it's certainly never occurred to me to tempt them or to be tempted by them in general. On an individual case I have known men who were off limits to my mind but didn't consider themselves so. I avoid them. That's not a hassle I want to deal with.
I've also got a lot of single, platonic male friends. A couple of them would probably take me up on an offer of more, but that's not really at the forefront of our friendships.
So, yes, I think it's quite possible but I do think you have to be careful and aware.
-B
catalina_francisco
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sunfox said:My best and closest friends are all men.. one of them I've known for over 25 years now. He's gorgeous.. kinda Brad Pitt-like.. but I've never been attracted beyond noticing rather belatedly that yes, he was good looking, when a female friend pointed it out.
I tend to prefer male friends to female. I have trouble trusting the members of my own gender to have my best interests in mind.
Sounds very much like my own experience. I have always found it a lot easier to find things in common with male friends more so than female, and not missed the hot and cold moments I have experienced with a lot of female friends. Some I know have been attracted to me as well as friends, but they respected my boundaries and valued the friendship above all else....others there was never a question of it being anything but friendship for either of us. Many still remain good friends to this day. Of course there have been the minor disruptions from time to time when male friends have become romantically involved with women who couldn't understand friendship between men and women without it having to be anything more, at which time I have respected the choice of the male to either discontinue the friendship for peace sake, or begin calling again once the romance has ended.
Catalinahttp://www.smilies4you.de/content/freundlich/a45.gif
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i have a VERY close female friend who I love dearly ... and we both know its never gonna go beyond strong soul-mate friendship, eventhough she's gorgeous and I'm attracted to her ...
I also have several female friends (married) that I get together with ... separately and with their hubby's .... never considered them to be anything more than close buddies
I always have had way more female friends than male ... I get along much better with women
I also have several female friends (married) that I get together with ... separately and with their hubby's .... never considered them to be anything more than close buddies
I always have had way more female friends than male ... I get along much better with women
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shy slave
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In the past i have had very close male friends.
Many of them have been gay so not sure if that makes a difference. Have to say I love gay men because of their slut behaviour and sharp humour.
At present do not have any close non-gay friends but have had.
I think it can work as long as neither of you has lustful or romantic feelings for the other.
Actually I am just in shock that this is a poll on the board dolf did not think of.
Should we do a poll about the polls dolf does compared to polls by others??
xx to dolf and tiger claw
Many of them have been gay so not sure if that makes a difference. Have to say I love gay men because of their slut behaviour and sharp humour.
At present do not have any close non-gay friends but have had.
I think it can work as long as neither of you has lustful or romantic feelings for the other.
Actually I am just in shock that this is a poll on the board dolf did not think of.
Should we do a poll about the polls dolf does compared to polls by others??
xx to dolf and tiger claw
A's Sweet Baby
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i answered "yes" but i suppose a lot hinges on what is meant by "fall into temptation." and as others have said ... it depends greatly on the 2 people involved.
TeasedWhispers
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Honestly it really depends on the people who are trying to be friends,who they are...their personalities,etc...so its possiable
ethereal~minx
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you know, i was told that my belief in this was selfish. i was told that it's taking advantage of a man but i do disagree. i've been told by men that 'all men want your sex, that's it'...that they may act like they're your friend but ultimately it's because they want you. basically, you can't trust them. maybe that was said because the man is distrusting of other men and of course, you.
if you have a friendship that you both value and respect, i see no reason why a woman should feel like it cannot be done. it's all about respect for eachother --- realizing the gift you are to each other.
i know myself and i know my boundaries. when i have a male friend, my boundaries are respected by him and if they aren't~ i question his intent, motive, authenticity. i don't know many men that will go to this extent~ forming a true friendship because they realize the mutual gains despite the wanting. most are only after one thing. but when you find one that isn't so intent on sex~ you've found a diamond. it takes strength to put your own motives aside & actually get to know someone.
i think to have a platonic relationship with a man ---to grow a friendship of depth and trust and respect is an experience that will help you when you actually want to have more w/ another..
shouldn't all relationships be founded on this basis?
if you have a friendship that you both value and respect, i see no reason why a woman should feel like it cannot be done. it's all about respect for eachother --- realizing the gift you are to each other.
i know myself and i know my boundaries. when i have a male friend, my boundaries are respected by him and if they aren't~ i question his intent, motive, authenticity. i don't know many men that will go to this extent~ forming a true friendship because they realize the mutual gains despite the wanting. most are only after one thing. but when you find one that isn't so intent on sex~ you've found a diamond. it takes strength to put your own motives aside & actually get to know someone.
i think to have a platonic relationship with a man ---to grow a friendship of depth and trust and respect is an experience that will help you when you actually want to have more w/ another..
shouldn't all relationships be founded on this basis?
graceanne
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ok, I also think that the reason that it's very unlikely is cause of the guy. LIke I said, it's possible, but unless the chicks a total dog . . .
Well, lets just say that if one of your girls came on to your friend, like really really, I seriously doubt that he'd turn you down. Cause Mr. Willie and Mr. Brain don't always agree with each other. I notice that it's mostly women here saying 'I have a guy friend, and nothing would ever happen.' And I bet if you asked them they'd agree, but that's cause it's their brains talking at that point, not their dicks. Get naked, and I bet Mr. Willie would win the friend/lover battle every time.
Well, lets just say that if one of your girls came on to your friend, like really really, I seriously doubt that he'd turn you down. Cause Mr. Willie and Mr. Brain don't always agree with each other. I notice that it's mostly women here saying 'I have a guy friend, and nothing would ever happen.' And I bet if you asked them they'd agree, but that's cause it's their brains talking at that point, not their dicks. Get naked, and I bet Mr. Willie would win the friend/lover battle every time.
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witcha
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I believe that in some cases it's possible...but yes also think that in fait amount of cases of fem/male friendship there's this temptation..She/He's an amazing friend..Would she/he be an amazing partner and lover too?? (or option for guys..Wonder how it'd feel to f*uck her)
I've recently started establishing a friendship with a really nice guy,the problem is however that my last friendship with a male ended when he decided he loved me and just had to tell me that. Sure we still talk...but all that was sooooooo good and special between us is gone now.
To sum up..this kind of friendship is possible,but very hard to find..prolly would work better with an eunuch
witcha
I've recently started establishing a friendship with a really nice guy,the problem is however that my last friendship with a male ended when he decided he loved me and just had to tell me that. Sure we still talk...but all that was sooooooo good and special between us is gone now.
To sum up..this kind of friendship is possible,but very hard to find..prolly would work better with an eunuch
witcha
ethereal~minx
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graceanne said:
the point of getting naked would not happen. it's all about knowing & respecting a man for his 'weakness' (or his ...nature)
it's about not putting either of you in a situation that would compromise your friendship. it takes alot of strength to balance both of your innate desires, it takes alot of strength to put your own vulnerabilities aside... hell, i'm vulnerable~ this depth is something i want and it would be easy to allow myself to take advantage of the situation but i would never be so selfish.
when you have such a friendship, falling into weakness should not happen. the respect would demand that you both consciously choose to do so, or not.
i don't see any falling into weakness when you respect each eachother's nature.
m wisdom
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graceanne said:
I would say you are right in most cases but not all.
If I'm drunk then it's 99% chance I'll give in.
But otherwise I have no problem thinking with my big brain and making a decision if it would be worth it or not. Some off us do have some control
I would guess I would do about 50% of my current female friends if I would be put in such a situation. It all depends on the reason why they want to.
graceanne
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m wisdom said:I would say you are right in most cases but not all.
If I'm drunk then it's 99% chance I'll give in.
But otherwise I have no problem thinking with my big brain and making a decision if it would be worth it or not. Some off us do have some control
I would guess I would do about 50% of my current female friends if I would be put in such a situation. It all depends on the reason why they want to.
I know that some guys have control, but the majority don't. Add alcohol or drugs into the equation, and it's a definate on mr willie winning the battle. And as you said, you'd do at least half of your friends. Here's a question, if they came to you and asked if you'd do them, or if you're just friends, would you tell them the truth?
