What does it take to become a HT regular?

It must be the relief of pressure from meeting a big deadline, but over the last day or so I've been pondering the group dynamics around here. I lurk more than I post here, though that hasn't always been the case. HT has been my primary forum at Lit for most of the two and a half years that I've been a member and during that time I've seen a number of shifts in personalities here. What seems to be common, though, is that the people who frequent HT seem to develop into a community even as people come and go over time.

I wonder why that is. So the question is this: what does it take to become a regular in HT? This is really a two-part question. First, what is it about HT that attracts a certain kind of person. Second, what do you think is common in the people who are regulars here that helps bind them into a community?

It's people who like to answer questions about how many posts it takes to get an avatar and how to measure penis size.

i participate very heavily in another discussion forum that revolves around RPGs (things like dungeons & dragons, that sort of thing) and that same question crops up now and again there.

IMX, people become regulars on a forum through a combination of longevity and identifiable style/personality.

example 1: not to pick on her (although i love to!), but let's consider bi. bi's a regular, i don't think anybody would argue that point. she's been on lit for some time now, but she's also got an identifiable personality and style (bijacking). she's also very funny and clever, even though she doesn't seem to think that she is.

example 2: eilan recently celebrated her 1 year anniversary of posting on lit after an unknown but clearly altogether too-long period of lurking. eilan's identifiable posting style: insightful and snarky. :> and i don't think that anybody would question that eilan's a regular here, either.

what draws people to HT or the HT cafe? clearly, a desire to ask and answer questions, which requires some modicum of desire for sincerity and honesty. or as eilan might say, "communication, communication, communication!". what i've noticed about those who are regulars here is a desire to share what knowledge and experience they've gained, which makes this place special to me.

as to what is the critical mass required to form a community: usually, at least 3 regulars who know and respect one another. through their interaction come the in-jokes (cock size threads, etc).

JMHO.

o yeah...

[trout-smacks yankee, just for the halibut]



ed

I'm not sure Yank. Lots of things I'm sure, for me I lurked a while before joining in the conversations, but the primary reason I came over was how much I was learning. I spent most of my early time on the PG and in the HT I found humor, seriousness and tons of information I needed to know. My nature is to ponder and through that I find humor - the HT has that.

As for what kept me coming here was the welcome I felt, feeling included is often under-rated around Lit, it can be difficult to join in or feel a part of something - here I found real thoughts that matter to my real life.

I am, though, slighly irregular.

I'll give it more thought later Yank - running on fumes here.

Top Ten Ways You Know You're an HT Regular:

1. People quote your posts. Over at the GB I couldn't get quoted if I was on fire. If I showed my tits, maybe...

2. You acquire a shortening of your screen name, although this is not foolproof. Some screen names are sufficiently short.

3. You hang around long enough to be given 's by Cate.

4. You've been here long enough to remember the old-timers like Bobmi357, a Litster I miss greatly.

5. You feel comfortable enough to be a smartass. This is my favorite.

6. You acquire a reputation of some kind. Refer to ed's post above.

7. If you don't post for a day or two, your presence is missed.

8. You have multi-post interaction with someone, on the same thread, in a very brief time. EJ and PTM would be happy to demonstrate.

9. You get trout-smacked for the halibut by ed.

10. You form a secret males-only cult that involves non-responsive answers and consuming large quantities of gut-busting burgers.

I just thought of the 11th way:

11. You no longer start size threads, unless it involves gross exaggeration.

bobsgirl said:

10. You form a secret males-only cult that involves non-responsive answers and consuming large quantities of gut-busting burgers.

Click to expand...

Damn, our secrets out!

TBKahuna123 said:

Damn, our secrets out!

Click to expand...

There's a tattletale among you.

[trout-smacks bobsgirl and cathleen]



ed

bobsgirl said:

There's a tattletale among you.

Click to expand...

Can we start a secret girls only club?

And I promise not to tell anyone it exists.

bisexplicit said:

Can we start a secret girls only club?

And I promise not to tell anyone it exists.

Click to expand...

How about the Pussy Pack?

Oops, me and my big mouth. I'm terrible at keeping secrets...

no, you can't.



ed

silverwhisper said:

[trout-smacks bobsgirl and cathleen]



ed

Click to expand...

*wiping fish guts off face*

Thanks, ed. I needed that.

So is it a sign that you're a regular or not when your thread is hijacked by a guy swinging a fish and a woman who wants to start a secret society dedicated to cats?

nah, that just means that your thread was bijacked. :> happens to everybody, regular or newbie alike.

i'll admit however to being surprised nobody's actually added anything on topic in a few hours, esp given how opinionated this bunch is.

ed

bobsgirl said:

How about the Pussy Pack?

Click to expand...

You mean a Snack Pack?

To be a regular, I think you just have to keep showing up and spouting off with the advice.

I think I first came here because the questions deal with relationships as much as sex, and I'm always interested in understanding the opposite sex. Now, I think a lot of my replies are as much for the lurkers as the thread starters - I want to make sure the younger ones get the real scoop on sex instead of what they've learned from porn or their equally inexperienced partners.

OK, seriously this time. I think what makes you a regular is simply that you keep showing up. The real question is what makes people keep coming back and making an actual contribution to the community?

Well I think it's desire, desire to help others and a desire to explore themselves. Heck I've learned as much as I've past on in my short time here. I think the thing that makes this particular forum wihtin a forum so special is the welcoming nature. Our occasional snarkiness at the odd size thread aside, the people of HT do try to make sure people are correctly informed, feel welcome, and leave with the knowledge they sought. Open and comfortable might be a good way to state it.

i think it takes two simple things to become an HT regular:

1. you have to be willing to accept that neither you nor any other single person knows everything.

2. you have to be willing to share what you know and absorb that which others know.


fwiw, and since it was brought up, sack pack information will be forthcoming in the near future.

midwestyankee said:

So is it a sign that you're a regular or not when your thread is hijacked by a guy swinging a fish and a woman who wants to start a secret society dedicated to cats?

Click to expand...

Well, Yank, you know how fond I am of my pussy.

bobsgirl said:

Top Ten Ways You Know You're an HT Regular:

Click to expand...

1. People quote your posts. Over at the GB I couldn't get quoted if I was on fire. If I showed my tits, maybe... Self explanatory

2. You acquire a shortening of your screen name, although this is not foolproof. Some screen names are sufficiently short. Hi BG

3. You hang around long enough to be given 's by Cate. I got some.

4. You've been here long enough to remember the old-timers like Bobmi357, a Litster I miss greatly. Very well said and very much missed.

5. You feel comfortable enough to be a smartass. This is my favorite. Sooo your implying that I'm a smartarse huh!

6. You acquire a reputation of some kind. Refer to ed's post above.That worries me a bit (How long before we see a poll on this?)

7. If you don't post for a day or two, your presence is missed. True

8. You have multi-post interaction with someone, on the same thread, in a very brief time. EJ and PTM would be happy to demonstrate. Sickening wasn't it.

9. You get trout-smacked for the halibut by ed.The piscatorial punisher *nods*

10. You form a secret males-only cult that involves non-responsive answers and consuming large quantities of gut-busting burgers.I value my sack far too much to betray the brotherhood. Just sayin'.

I just thought of the 11th way:

11. You no longer start size threads, unless it involves gross exaggeration.True, they are both gross and exaggerated.

I think one of the main reasons is acceptance.
Everyone here has different ideologies, whether it be politics, religion, sexuality or just their general outlook on life, and yet they are never forced on others here. These ideologies are are simply accepted by other members as being part of who we are.
The place is 95% snark free, now that's a hell of a lot better than out there, and you need a little snark now and then.
Oh shit, look it's a nice place, we all hang here because it make us feel comfortable.

o quoll...you know me so well...

ed

Thanks for the replies so far (even the snarkiness, for that's typical here). So far what I've seen matches up with my own experience fairly well. People here respond to genuine interest in helping others and sincere responses when the subject matter is serious.

Now, to slightly recast the question (or add a corollary): what advice would you give a lurker who would like to become accepted into the HT community?

midwestyankee said:

Now, to slightly recast the question (or add a corollary): what advice would you give a lurker who would like to become accepted into the HT community?

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respect OPINIONS that may be different from yours... and dispute FACTS in a tactful manner.

i remember when SW and scalywag first flopped in... they didn't hesitate to show their personalities and just be themselves. i think that's kind of important... be genuine and CARE.