More young men fucking older women would solve so many problems

I can see the merits of sexual relations across generations if there is something in it for both partners (I too am not particularly interested in being a tutor for the sexually clueless unless there is otherwise a strong connection). However, I wouldn't make such a distinction between the dynamics of older woman/younger man and older man/younger women.

To the extent that the dynamics tend to work differently it is more a by-product of societal constructs and expectations than any intrinsic difference. I don't see young women being any less able to deal with heartbreak or disappointment or power dynamics or the prospect of being used or lied to. Likewise I don't see young women as being intrinsically any less able to regard the relationship with clear-eyed vision. I dated several older men when I was a young woman and did not feel like it was fraught with anything - but that came down to my approach which involved ignoring (as much as possible) what society thought.

The key difference in my view is in expectations. If a young man is fucking an attractive older woman society generally thinks he should enjoy it while it lasts and keep his head as straight as possible. We don't infer any commitment on her part unless she has stated one and we don't denigrate him for just enjoying the sex.

When the genders are reversed it is society that casts the young woman as either vulnerable naïf or manipulative gold digger. It is almost unimaginable that she is just enjoying the sex and keeping her head straight – how dare she be so independent and not submit to the ethos that such behaviour (preferred for a man) makes her soiled goods.

We tend to see these things based on what is shown to us. The instances of young woman/older man that we see are the ones that society and media want to hold up to us as proof of misogyny. There are plenty of young women (like I was) who have sexual relationships with older men with no fuss and no drama and no negative consequences. But that doesn’t support the popular narrative, so nobody talks about it.

Meanwhile if an older woman/younger man sexual relationship goes off the rails, we tend to dismiss it – oh well at least he got laid. The difference in how we perceive the role reversal isn’t rooted in empirical evidence. It is rooted in how these situations are portrayed and how we have been conditioned to regard them.
 
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What exactly is the benefit to the older woman in this scenario? Why would I want to train a puppy instead of be properly fucked?



Also, I don’t think you know what feminism means. ForFuckSake. 🙄

I have always found it peculiar the way men can twist things to somehow blame women for their own sexual inadequacies.

In my experience most mature women don't expect men to just magically know everything about us sexually. We expect to need to communicate. And if we feel a genuine connection to them we will invest in mutual exploration and teaching them how to please us and learning how to please them.

More often than not if a woman has a poor sexual experience and chooses not to invest more into that man, I'd say it is because he hasn't presented any (or enough) redeeming qualities to make it worth her effort.

At the end of the day, we aren't obliged to be tutors and trainers. We should all strive to be supportive of one another as human beings, but that has its limits as we must all take responsibility for ourselves as well.

Do women sometimes just want a good fuck and would selfishly rather be with a man who already offers that rather than pulling some 3rd stringer off the bench and showing him the ropes? Yes we do. But it is about 100 on a 100 point scale of hypocrisy for men as a gender to get worked up about someone just wanting a predictably good fuck with no strings attached.
 
I have always found it peculiar the way men can twist things to somehow blame women for their own sexual inadequacies.

In my experience most mature women don't expect men to just magically know everything about us sexually. We expect to need to communicate. And if we feel a genuine connection to them we will invest in mutual exploration and teaching them how to please us and learning how to please them.

More often than not if a woman has a poor sexual experience and chooses not to invest more into that man, I'd say it is because he hasn't presented any (or enough) redeeming qualities to make it worth her effort.

At the end of the day, we aren't obliged to be tutors and trainers. We should all strive to be supportive of one another as human beings, but that has its limits as we must all take responsibility for ourselves as well.

Do women sometimes just want a good fuck and would selfishly rather be with a man who already offers that rather than pulling some 3rd stringer off the bench and showing him the ropes? Yes we do. But it is about 100 on a 100 point scale of hypocrisy for men as a gender to get worked up about someone just wanting a predictably good fuck with no strings attached.
I did not read him as twisting things. I got the impression he was making some effort to understand. He obviously recognizes that he has to learn to become a good sexual partner, which is progress from, say, 20 years ago, when young men thought that just because they could pump in and out for extended periods, they were good lovers.

The fundamental issue that seems to be holding him back is that he has not learned to view women as individuals with individual needs, interests and desires. And maybe the flip comment about feminism didn't help.
 
What exactly is the benefit to the older woman in this scenario? Why would I want to train a puppy instead of be properly fucked?



Also, I don’t think you know what feminism means. ForFuckSake. 🙄
Too funny! Can’t argue with those thoughts!
 
I did not read him as twisting things. I got the impression he was making some effort to understand. He obviously recognizes that he has to learn to become a good sexual partner, which is progress from, say, 20 years ago, when young men thought that just because they could pump in and out for extended periods, they were good lovers.

The fundamental issue that seems to be holding him back is that he has not learned to view women as individuals with individual needs, interests and desires. And maybe the flip comment about feminism didn't help.

Fair enough, I should have been clearer that I wasn't referring specifically to the OP, but rather some attitude and comments that I have noticed more broadly when the subject of a man not being well versed in how to please a woman. Some guys get very defensive and lash out at women who aren't willing to put in that extra effort to teach them. I don't think is a fair expectation at least not in all circumstances. It might be the generous thing to do but that is our prerogative to decide how much we will invest in any given man.
 
Fair enough, I should have been clearer that I wasn't referring specifically to the OP, but rather some attitude and comments that I have noticed more broadly when the subject of a man not being well versed in how to please a woman. Some guys get very defensive and lash out at women who aren't willing to put in that extra effort to teach them. I don't think is a fair expectation at least not in all circumstances. It might be the generous thing to do but that is our prerogative to decide how much we will invest in any given man.
Wow.
I didn't realize that had become a new thing.
I'm sure I didn't read everything posted on this thread.
I knew that it was a thing, or at least used to be, that men believed that if they were strong and manly and had a hard dick, that was all that it took to be a good lover. But I guess it hadn't registered that men were now demanding that women teach them. Of course, now that you say it, this does sound like sort of the next step in a more or less natural progression of male privilege. Or male expectation of privilege.
 
This thread reminds me of brilliant joke I first heard many decades ago...
Q: What's the difference between a clitoris and a pub?
A: Most men can find their way to a pub.
 
Wow.
I didn't realize that had become a new thing.
I'm sure I didn't read everything posted on this thread.
I knew that it was a thing, or at least used to be, that men believed that if they were strong and manly and had a hard dick, that was all that it took to be a good lover. But I guess it hadn't registered that men were now demanding that women teach them. Of course, now that you say it, this does sound like sort of the next step in a more or less natural progression of male privilege. Or male expectation of privilege.

I'd say my comments ventured beyond the content of this thread. What resonated with me was the idea of a woman teaching a man to please her. In that context I have been surprised at the degree to which some guys (in other discussions) will accuse women who are sexually unsatisfied of being impatient or selfish for moving on rather than investing in teaching the man to please her.

Obviously there are situations where that might be the appropriate response (i.e. if she is in a committed relationship and her spouse is receptive) and situations where it is an unrealistic expectation (i.e. someone she just started dating).

But what struck me about those comments was the guys making them were effectively acknowledging their inability to please a woman then blaming her for it rather than owning their own shortcomings.
 
I'd say my comments ventured beyond the content of this thread. What resonated with me was the idea of a woman teaching a man to please her. In that context I have been surprised at the degree to which some guys (in other discussions) will accuse women who are sexually unsatisfied of being impatient or selfish for moving on rather than investing in teaching the man to please her.

Obviously there are situations where that might be the appropriate response (i.e. if she is in a committed relationship and her spouse is receptive) and situations where it is an unrealistic expectation (i.e. someone she just started dating).

But what struck me about those comments was the guys making them were effectively acknowledging their inability to please a woman then blaming her for it rather than owning their own shortcomings.
So, what we have is a progession from denial to a refusal to take responsibilty.
NOt sure whether that is a form of progress or now.
I suppose part of the problem is that boys and men get their information and education from porn, which generally shows women to be in a constantly aroused state and readily achieving orgasm.
But by and large, I think the answer is that men need to invest enough in a relationship to make a woman want to work with them.
Men: relationships require some effort.
 
So, what we have is a progession from denial to a refusal to take responsibilty.
NOt sure whether that is a form of progress or now.
I suppose part of the problem is that boys and men get their information and education from porn, which generally shows women to be in a constantly aroused state and readily achieving orgasm.
But by and large, I think the answer is that men need to invest enough in a relationship to make a woman want to work with them.
Men: relationships require some effort.

It feels to me like a different sort of denial. In addition to investing in a relationship I think that it is important to see things as they truly are.

Nobody is entitled to expect someone else to consider them as a sexual partner. And there is nothing that anybody can do to earn that entitlement unless so agreed upon by the other party. I don't owe it to anybody to "give them a shot" so to speak. Who I choose to consider as a sexual partner is solely my discretion and no man has the right to feel or act aggrieved for not being considered.

Meanwhile, the notion that we can do anything we put our minds is something we tell children to motivate them to take on the world with confidence. It isn't literally true. Not every man who puts his mind to it has the physical characteristics to play for the Chicago Bulls. And not every guy who tries hard is going to be a stud.

We shouldn’t tear one another down, but nor should any of us be obliged to indulge someone else’s delusions or endure their hostility for not doing so.

Sometimes men simply need to accept that a woman isn’t interested in him or accept that he isn’t going to rock her world no matter how hard he tries. That is reality and it is nobody’s fault that she doesn’t see him the way he wants to be seen.
 
Nothing better than an older woman. They know what they want and want what they need. MMMMM
 
Well said. I know from experience, it was my lack of understanding or communication that left my lover less than thrilled.

This is probably a statement of the obvious, but often one of the challenges is establishing that your partner is receptive to communication and being told how you want them to do something. This is not restricted to one age group, but younger guys do seem to be more inclined to get defensive and regard anything but praise as criticism. Simply opening up those communication channels can result in backlash. Certainly I find that I need to pause and consider whether that is likely to happen and is it worth it, especially with someone who you are likely to encounter regularly. I have found ways to manage pretty well, but that response is not an inconsequential concern.
 
This is probably a statement of the obvious, but often one of the challenges is establishing that your partner is receptive to communication and being told how you want them to do something. This is not restricted to one age group, but younger guys do seem to be more inclined to get defensive and regard anything but praise as criticism. Simply opening up those communication channels can result in backlash. Certainly I find that I need to pause and consider whether that is likely to happen and is it worth it, especially with someone who you are likely to encounter regularly. I have found ways to manage pretty well, but that response is not an inconsequential concern.
Intimate, interpersonal communications are complicated.
For all sexes.
It requires a degree of commitment and trust to pull it off.
(Whereas, pulling off our own organ is much simpler.)
With respect to the issue of hetero men learning about what feels good to a female partner, one of the challenges can be figuring out how to ask.
"What do you want me to do" can sound demanding and offputting in many circumstances.

Whereas "Does this feel good?" or "Do you want me to...? can work better.
And learning to pay attention to how her body is reacting (before the climax or pretend, When Harry Met SAlly climax)
 
When I was younger I met a woman at a pool in an apartment complex. There was music, drinking, and a dozen or so people there. This woman took a liking to me. She tough me a lot in the few hours I spent with her. A lot of lessons that benefited me and many of my future partners.
 
I would love for my wife to experience a younger guy.
She would be really reluctant to do it. It would be so hot though! Would anyone else like to see their wife with a younger guy?

Any women desire to have a younger guy?

Would anyone like to share any experiences the might have had?
 
Intimate, interpersonal communications are complicated.
For all sexes.
It requires a degree of commitment and trust to pull it off.
(Whereas, pulling off our own organ is much simpler.)
With respect to the issue of hetero men learning about what feels good to a female partner, one of the challenges can be figuring out how to ask.
"What do you want me to do" can sound demanding and offputting in many circumstances.

Whereas "Does this feel good?" or "Do you want me to...? can work better.
And learning to pay attention to how her body is reacting (before the climax or pretend, When Harry Met SAlly climax)

I am a big believer in facing such matters directly but not bluntly. Be nice. Be constructive. Make your positive intentions known.

But don't beat around the bush. It is just confusing. And for goodness sake don't be passive aggressive or aim for subliminal or subtle, indirect messaging. It fools nobody and irritates everybody.

All that said, I think that one of the biggest reasons it can be difficult to figure out how to ask is not knowing if your partner is receptive to the question. From the perspective of a woman wanting to let a guy know what I want or what I need him to change quite a few men are so sensitive to those topics that it borders on just not wanting to hear it. You gotta ask in the right way, but that won't be good enough if the partner isn't open to the possibility of receiving input.
 
(in order to comply with forum rules [EDIT: thank you for the clarification in terms], specific ages will not be mentioned)

There are some taboos that are probably worth keeping in place - older men seducing younger women is fraught with peril, which means that even when it goes right, it probably shouldn't be encouraged. Increasingly, however, I find myself wondering if there is in fact much of a downside to the opposite - older women seducing younger men.

The number one difficulty young heterosexual couples face is that the man has absolutely no idea how to please the woman - how to lick and kiss and fuck. This provides a needless burden on the young woman to educate the young man when she may not even be experienced enough to know what she likes herself, and can delay her achieving sexual satisfaction for years if not decades. An older woman being the man's first partner, when he is as young as morally acceptable, would do wonders - she could teach him the ropes, giving him the stamina, sensitivity, and confidence needed to go back and make love to younger women as they deserve to be. It's practical feminism in action!
In that case, I'd love to help some of the worlds problems as much as I can x x x x
 
My son has these 3 friends that I take turns thinking about and jacking off with fantasies of them fucking their friend's old mom. I'd LOVE! to be a cleanup and cock sucking old dad for one or all 3 of them fucking my wife's old granny pussy. They range from 37 to 42 years old. their friend's mom is still hot at 69.
 
What exactly is the benefit to the older woman in this scenario? Why would I want to train a puppy instead of be properly fucked?

There's no reason the term young man has to apply to only 18-20 year old "pups". By the time I was 25 I was pretty damn skilled in bed and was still a young man. That's the sort of guy I'd think would be attractive to an older woman. Out of school, working, has a trade and is starting to make his way in the world. He's had a few relationships and is confident and capable. But is still a young man.
 
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