Porn written in the style of a famous author

[EmilyMiller]

If you really want your perceptions of TLTWATW to be... er... fucked with, then read "The Problem of Susan" by Neil Gaiman.

Will have to.

Also, I had a pet crow when I was young. Crows are the best!

I’ve always been drawn to them. It’s not like I was ever a goth or anything.

Em

 

[onehitwanda]

Will have to.

Be warned. Um. It's not... light... reading. It forever changed my view of the books in an extremely harsh and pointed way.

 

[SimonDoom]

I like corvids in general and Corvus corax in particular. Cronk! Cronk! Bok! Bok! Bok!


Em

They are highly intelligent and have lots of personality. There are several different types where I live. Magpies are striking birds.

A friend of mine raised a crow for a while until he released it to the wild, and it was surprising how pet-like and interactive the bird was.

 

[onehitwanda]

Will have to.

I’ve always been drawn to them. It’s not like I was ever a goth or anything.

Em

Nothing renders you powerless like a corvid. They are little feathery malevolent black-eyed fucks. They steal shit, and destroy shit for the hell of it. They are also phenomenally intelligent and affectionate. They're like winged cats with a British sense of humour. Cannot recommend highly enough.

 

[EmilyMiller]

They are highly intelligent and have lots of personality. There are several different types where I live. Magpies are striking birds.

A friend of mine raised a crow for a while until he released it to the wild, and it was surprising how pet-like and interactive the bird was.

Super smart and quite adorable - and they like messing with eagles. My kinda birds.

Em

 

[EmilyMiller]

Nothing renders you powerless like a corvid. They are little feathery malevolent black-eyed fucks. They steal shit, and destroy shit for the hell of it. They are also phenomenally intelligent and affectionate. They're like winged cats with a British sense of humour. Cannot recommend highly enough.

Never met one face to beak. But love hearing ravens when in the back of beyond. Always think they are up to no good.

Em

 

[SimonDoom]

Super smart and quite adorable - and they like messing with eagles. My kinda birds.

Em

I often see a pair of crows chasing a red-tailed hawk. Eagles are a much less common sight around here, although I see them every once in a while.

 

[EmilyMiller]

I often see a pair of crows chasing a red-tailed hawk. Eagles are a much less common sight around here, although I see them every once in a while.

They like fucking with raptors. Raptors are the jocks of the bird kingdom. Ravens are the cool outsiders who don’t join high school cliques.

Em

 

[gunhilltrain]

Thank you

I'm a bit dense today. Who was that based on?

 

[gunhilltrain]

yeah, it was an easy target

Sorry, I didn't get that one either.

 

[EmilyMiller]

I'm a bit dense today. Who was that based on?

Really? How many poems do you know that include “quoth” in them? And which might appeal to a thesaurus-swallowing girl like me?

Em

 

[gunhilltrain]

I had one that I wrote in an old screenplay. Someday, I may make it into a story, but it's so long. It would take a bit of explaining if anyone is interested.

 

[gunhilltrain]

Really? How many poems do you know that include “quoth” in them? And which might appeal to a thesaurus-swallowing girl like me?

Em

I have a very erratic memory when it comes to poetry. Which is strange, because I like to use bits of them in stories - usually being quoted by a female character. Robert Lowell will appear twice in my Geek Pride story. (Not as a parody, for sure.)

 

[Euphony]

Courting that Lit demo...

“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune appendage, must be in want of his sister.”

 

[onehitwanda]

Courting that Lit demo...

“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune appendage, must be in want of his sister.”

But is he a fine, upstanding member of the local community?

 

[Euphony]

But is he a fine, upstanding member of the local community?

Depends. Where do you fall on the suitability of zombies?

 

[SimonDoom]

They like fucking with raptors. Raptors are the jocks of the bird kingdom. Ravens are the cool outsiders who don’t join high school cliques.

Em

Don't forget jays. Despite their smaller size they don't take shit from anybody. I've seen jays chase crows.

Magpies are more chill and sociable. They like to hang out and forage in groups.

 

[gunhilltrain]

Courting that Lit demo...

“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune appendage, must be in want of his sister.”

Jane Austen?

 

[Euphony]

Jane Austen?

P & P for sure.

 

[gunhilltrain]

P & P for sure.

Pride and Prejudice. Can't people on this site stop using abbreviations for everything? ITOHTLTU.

 

[Euphony]

Pride and Prejudice. Can't people on this site stop using abbreviations for everything? ITOHTLTU.

NKOTB?

 

[EmilyMiller]

Courting that Lit demo...

“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune appendage, must be in want of his sister.”

“If a woman is kind enough to allow you to probe her anal cavity, then she should, at the very least, be extended some consideration.”

The Pornstar Experience

 

[gunhilltrain]

Hah, see what I mean? "I'm tired of having to look them up." A common texting usage. Someday there will be messages consisting entirely of abbreviations. (A reply to NKOTB?)

 

[Euphony]

“If a woman is kind enough to allow you to probe her anal cavity, then she should, at the very least, be extended some consideration.”

The Pornstar Experience

“The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasured in a good novel fisting, must be intolerably stupid.”

 

[Euphony]

Hah, see what I mean? "I'm tired of having to look them up." A common texting usage. Someday there will be messages consisting entirely of abbreviations.

I mean, I get it but it has an "Old Man Yells At Cloud" vibe. Certainly out of character for you Hill so I played with it a bit.

NKOTB is a joke for the older sect.

New Kids on the Block was a decidedly boy band that tried to "mature" by re-moniker-ing.

And if society isn't using boy bands for the font of wisdom they are, what are we even doing?